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Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here
I'm thinking you rent a sick-rear end sports car and drive it through the window of the bank. Make sure Fiona Apple's Criminal is blaring out of your 15" sub-woofers. Get out wearing your knee length powder-blue Insane Clown Posse t-shirt and walk up to the teller holding your Mac-10 sideways. Ask for all the money in benjis, benjemins or c-notes: your choice. Say something cool when you leave like "Syonara suckas!" Die in a shoot-out with police while screaming the lyrics to "gently caress da' police."

Alright, GBS. What you got?

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A Concrete Divider
Jan 20, 2012

The Unbearable Whiteness of Eating
Possession of meth

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

Candlelight Virgil posted:

Possession of meth

Duh. I totally should have thought of that.

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord
Probably you two guys for being too sexy. Police are on their way FYI

The Human Crouton
Sep 20, 2002

Don't you really mean "Coolest act you can think of that is also a felony?" Coolest felony gives it a lot of restraint because your thread title suggests that it must be a felony title, but you provide an action that just happens to be legal felony, but would be less cool when just described as a legal felony.

The Human Crouton fucked around with this message at 04:03 on Mar 13, 2018

Bip Roberts
Mar 29, 2005
sucking a dick.... ON FIRE!!!

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

The Human Crouton posted:

Don't you really mean "Coolest act you can think of?" Coolest felony gives it a lot of restraint, but you suggest an action that also happens to be legal felony, but would be less cool when just described as a legal felony.

This is the most sensical post I have ever read.

Thots and Prayers
Jul 13, 2006

A is the for the atrocious abominated acts that YOu committed. A is also for ass-i-nine, eight, seven, and six.

B, b, b - b is for your belligerent, bitchy, bottomless state of affairs, but why?

C is for the cantankerous condition of our character, you have no cut-out.
Grimey Drawer
Stealing an expensive freezer

The Human Crouton
Sep 20, 2002

Literally A Person posted:

This is the most sensical post I have ever read.

You think that now. I edited it to be even more sensical.

TheReverend
Jun 21, 2005

Going to Mattress Firm and ripping off all the tags.

client
Aug 19, 2010

aggravated mayhem

spinderella
Jul 15, 2017

by FactsAreUseless
Murdering an Eskimo?

Former DILF
Jul 13, 2017

Voting for hillary clinton twice in the same election as an illegal immigrant

Ralph Hurley
Aug 3, 2009

:barf::sweep::zoid:



Grand Larsony

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

TheReverend posted:

Going to Mattress Firm and ripping off all the tags.

Dude, we're all just trying to have a good time here. This is loving sick.

Mods, ban this sick filth.

poisonpill
Nov 8, 2009

The only way to get huge fast is to insult a passing witch and hope she curses you with Beast-strength.


banging the queen

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
probably cocaine

girls love it

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
either that or giving a politician a motherfreakING SUPER SWIRLIE

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004



ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP

Releasing the piss tape.

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013

by R. Guyovich
Treason

Duke Pukem
Oct 23, 2010

Three cheers for dark beer!


stealing a zamboni

Cyberpunkey Monkey
Jun 23, 2003

by Nyc_Tattoo
treason used to be cool, but that wasn't enough so they had to invent sedition

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

Duke Pukem posted:

stealing a zamboni

drat, thats pretty cool yeah

Sand Dan
May 15, 2017

welcum 2 our
sick cyberpunk h e l l
blowing weed smoke into Jeff Sessions' face

client
Aug 19, 2010

theres something called "theft of a legend drug" which i guess means stealing jenkem or adrenochrome or some poo poo

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

Duke Pukem posted:

stealing a zamboni

:perfect:

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

Sand Dan posted:

blowing weed smoke into Jeff Sessions' face

same but directly up he own rear end in a top hat

The Human Crouton
Sep 20, 2002

Duke Pukem posted:

stealing a zamboni

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVkJbvv3pHg

Except you steal it.

A_Bug_That_Thinks
Mar 16, 2011


ASK ME ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE BIG SAGGY POKEMON TITS
Assassinating the you-know-who of the you-know-what

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010

client posted:

theres something called "theft of a legend drug" which i guess means stealing jenkem or adrenochrome or some poo poo

It sounds cool but mostly would refer to stealing someone's medication, which is very uncool.

Bank robbery is definitely the coolest crime.

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

A_Bug_That_Thinks posted:

Assassinating the you-know-who of the you-know-what

:tinfoil:

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord

A_Bug_That_Thinks posted:

Assassinating the you-know-who of the you-know-what

Ops death wouldn’t be important enough to be considered assassination imo

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

Kuato posted:

Ops death wouldn’t be important enough to be considered assassination imo

...oh. Dang.

A_Bug_That_Thinks
Mar 16, 2011


ASK ME ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE BIG SAGGY POKEMON TITS

Kuato posted:

Ops death wouldn’t be important enough to be considered assassination imo

It would be...if he were the most powerful person in the free world

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Equinal manslaughter

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord

A_Bug_That_Thinks posted:

It would be...if he were the most powerful person in the free world

Op is pretty dumb. But is he Donald j. Trump dumb? Maybe! :tinfoil:

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

Kuato posted:

Op is pretty dumb. But is he Donald j. Trump dumb? Maybe! :tinfoil:

Double-dang.

Brother Tadger
Feb 15, 2012

I'm accidentally a suicide bomber!

Are you serious?

Arson. Like, by a large margin, arson, OP. Arson is the coolest felony.

Egbert Souse
Nov 6, 2008

Painting mustaches on all the people in The Apotheosis of Washington

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xtal
Jan 9, 2011

by Fluffdaddy
Extortion. The X makes it sound cool

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