Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

Girl, don't even give me your birthing pains sob story, I had triplets with no medication and the labor took 70 hours. When I went into labor, my husband was just entering the tv world for the first time in Persona 4 and by th etime the trips had arrived, he had discovered the killer and confessed his love to Chie.


Oh, Kaylee is reading at a third grade level now? How nice for her. My toddler Skylar has an opinion on the oxford comma, and it's nuanced.


Kevin made Soccer Captain? ... cute. Brian is capable of carrying up to 70,000 pounds (32,000 kg) of weapons, and has a typical combat range of more than 8,800 miles (14,080 km) without aerial refueling.


**this thread can also be boasts by babys about themselves**

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

Really happy to hear your water birth was a magical experience... our salt water birth was hellish but our son is going to be the baddest dude in the history of the world. We'll have to set up a play date so little Danzig can meet your "magical little angel."


~~~ byob summer 2020 ~~~ sig responsibly ~~~ i hope you enjoy my sig ~~~ please dont kangaroo jack what you cant kangaroo give back. ~~~

Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

*Mother holding her hands out wide* I once had a baby thiiiiiisss big


~~~ byob summer 2020 ~~~ sig responsibly ~~~ i hope you enjoy my sig ~~~ please dont kangaroo jack what you cant kangaroo give back. ~~~

Ride The Gravitron

by FactsAreUseless
My baby was digitally replicated to make 3 of of the seven babies in the hit 1992 family comedy Baby Geniuses

Ride The Gravitron

by FactsAreUseless
Well my child was chosen to be the annual sacrifice to our god.

Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

Your child is on the honor roll? How quaint. Our child brought honor to our clan by slaying 34 Mongolian invaders with a longbow.


~~~ byob summer 2020 ~~~ sig responsibly ~~~ i hope you enjoy my sig ~~~ please dont kangaroo jack what you cant kangaroo give back. ~~~

Ride The Gravitron

by FactsAreUseless
Oh that? That's Terminator. You see my son is such a successful part of the human resistance that robots are going back in time to stop his birth.

canyoneer


I only have canyoneyes for you
Oh, your son likes Daniel Tiger? My daughter wrote the whole Baby Margaret story arc from season 2 and beyond when she was 8 months old.

Android Blues

Ride The Gravitron posted:

Oh that? That's Terminator. You see my son is such a successful part of the human resistance that robots are going back in time to stop his birth.

take the moon

by sebmojo

Jolo posted:

Your child is on the honor roll? How quaint. Our child brought honor to our clan by slaying 34 Mongolian invaders with a longbow.

lol

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

Doctor Dogballs

driving the fuck truck from hand land to pound town without stopping at suction station


no but i seen a really big boast :haw:

----------------
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/HopefulSophisticatedIndianrhinoceros-mobile.webm
"The Bad Boy of Comics"

Farecoal

There he go

byob baby posted:

hey guys just poo poo myself again

lol just lol if you're 2 months and still making GBS threads yourself

Jedrick

:420: There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high-powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.
Smoke weed every day.
:420:
haha babies can't drive boats

Twenty Four


Jedrick posted:

haha babies can't drive boats

They can't even talk or anything like what's the point of babies?

Just get rid of them and move on to toddlers or even skip that!

I might consider a child if they can be close to the same age or older then me.

That kid would be amazing, and worthy of many boasts, having a great retirement plan and a well planned out portfolio, my well loved but older then me offspring!

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
Lol that you had to wait for your kid to be BORN to find out they were mediocre at best.

When MY kid was conceived I got an email saying they were in the running for a Nobel. Category?

Future Shoulder of a Giant :smug:

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

For Sale: Baby Shoes, Worn by Baby NBA Dunk Competition Winner Slamjam Sheffield (360 Tomahawk slam from half court line)


~~~ byob summer 2020 ~~~ sig responsibly ~~~ i hope you enjoy my sig ~~~ please dont kangaroo jack what you cant kangaroo give back. ~~~

PHIZ KALIFA

#mood
I stand on one leg, rest the other on the top windowsill of my vantage point in the dallas schoolbook depository. eyeing down my mons venus, i line up my birth canal with my target and account for wind resistance and bullet drop. by popping into a squat, i hear that familiar ka-CHAK indicating a round has been chambered. today, my little bwendolyn makes history.

crimes

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

I stand on one leg, rest the other on the top windowsill of my vantage point in the dallas schoolbook depository. eyeing down my mons venus, i line up my birth canal with my target and account for wind resistance and bullet drop. by popping into a squat, i hear that familiar ka-CHAK indicating a round has been chambered. today, my little bwendolyn makes history.

**fidgets with as-yet-unconcieved kid's Nobel nervously**

HERE. YOU deserve this more... That was some impressive... self-loading?

Yeah. We'll run with that

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

PHIZ KALIFA

#mood
from my position on the bottom of the orbital platform, i could see the cybercityscape stretch undifferentiated across the surface of Urth-69. my stomach rumbled, the flesh writhing with hungry young. i felt my boi-yoni stretch and disdend, heard the wet snapping as my anatomy rearranged itself. i suppose it hurt, but my body was a distant discomfort i watched, slack-faced, go about its wretched business. i saw it, myself, i suppose i was the one who pulled down my fishnets, the soaked-through panties i stole from senpai's laundry, i popped a squat upon the translucent hatch, and saw it gently unclench.

What horrors rained down upon that planet I cannot name. I only know the name which screams through every fried neuron with each successive cummies: Onii-san. Onii-san. Onii-san, I love you. Onii-san, I live for you. Onii-san, fill me with your hungry love. Onii-san.

crimes

PHIZ KALIFA

#mood
my baby kills threads at a college level :getin:

crimes

Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

"My baby takes the morning train, he works from nine till five and then...."

Uh, gonna cut you off right there. My baby designed the magnetic levitation system that allows your baby's train to get to and from work safely and efficiently. My baby is a magnetic engineering pioneer and and he has changed the world as we know it.


~~~ byob summer 2020 ~~~ sig responsibly ~~~ i hope you enjoy my sig ~~~ please dont kangaroo jack what you cant kangaroo give back. ~~~

google THIS

Me: Yes, well, it's been a lovely playgroup. I'd love to stay and continue to chat about our little ones' SAT scores, but if you'll excuse me, I have a 2:30 appointment to get shot in an alley so my son can become Batman.

Other Parents: :aaa:

PHIZ KALIFA

#mood
its good to start a college fund early, its even gooder to cryogenically freeze all ur organs on the off chance lil'spunky needs a spare ticker when he turns 69

crimes

rump buttman

I just wish I had time for one more bowl of chili



*overhearing two cub scout moms talking over a checkin table*

Mom 1. huh. I guess it’s neat your little timmy took third at the council wide pinewood derby.

Mom 2. yeah, he worked really hrd on solidworks designing and hand sanded the contours

Mom 1. wow, I wish mark took more initiative.

*i run over and clumsily windmill slamming a pic of my little Susie chopping down a pine tree with her buck teeth *

HUSKY DILF

aggressively chill

Jolo posted:

For Sale: Baby Shoes, Worn by Baby NBA Dunk Competition Winner Slamjam Sheffield (360 Tomahawk slam from half court line)

the shortest nba dunk competition every competed

cda

by Hand Knit

Jolo posted:

For Sale: Baby Shoes, Worn by Baby NBA Dunk Competition Winner Slamjam Sheffield (360 Tomahawk slam from half court line)

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

cda

by Hand Knit

google THIS posted:

Me: Yes, well, it's been a lovely playgroup. I'd love to stay and continue to chat about our little ones' SAT scores, but if you'll excuse me, I have a 2:30 appointment to get shot in an alley so my son can become Batman.

Other Parents: :aaa:

Lol

  • Locked thread