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If I was rich I would.... Start a chain of restaurants that just serves coleslaw and nothing else. It's hard to find good coleslaw these days. Buy a Walmart and make it not open to the public so I can shop alone and not have to wait in line to purchase things. Buy Wells Fargo change the name to "Smells Farto" and sell the company to a disgruntled employee for one dollar. Buy the Girl Scouts organization and force the girls to make reduced fat Lemon Coolers again and only make those from now on.  Drive like 100mph to my crappy job so I'm not late anymore and just pay off all the speeding tickets cash like whatever I'm rich. |
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Mar 20, 2018 21:46
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I would pay off my student loans, buy everyone in my family a house and car, donate to the ACLU and erowid, and then put the rest in an account to live off interest. |
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Mar 20, 2018 22:25
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not ready posted:I would pay off my student loans, buy everyone in my family a house and car, donate to the ACLU and erowid, and then put the rest in an account to live off interest. You're still thinking like a poor person. Instead of just paying off your loans buy the student loan company and then bribe the bank to transfer all the student loans to people you don't like, then raise the interest rate to like 9999% and then sell the company to the most evil landlord you can find.
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Mar 20, 2018 22:40
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My goal in being rich would be that I wouldn't have to worry about paying bills or having a place to sleep. That would allow me to have more time to enjoy life and maybe do what I can to help others enjoy life too. This, no doubt, is why I'm not rich.
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Mar 20, 2018 23:24
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If I were rich I'd be really into yachting and helicopters. When someone asks me why I don't have a helipad on my yacht I'll tell them that you can have too much of a good thing and then use my GoGoGadget Helicopter Hat to fly to my yacht. |
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Mar 21, 2018 00:25
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poop in the worlds biggest toilet. I’m not sure what meal I would eat in preparation, but I’d make Gordon Ramsey taste it first incase it’s diarrhea inducing. I’d want to lay logs. |
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Mar 21, 2018 00:39
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How rich we talkin here? Bill Gates/Warren Buffett rich? I'd figure out how to clone a dinosaur and then eat it. Regular run of the mill never to have to work again live off investments rich? I guess just eat panda. |
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Mar 21, 2018 01:09
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I'd buy Pepsi Co. and order a halt on all Pepsi products and produce only Pepsi Blue. I'd also buy and reboot the XFL with the only sponsorship/advertising being for Pepsi Blue. All players can drink on the sideline is Pepsi Blue and it will be the only drink sold at the stadium. I'd also buy a red '84 Ferrari Testarossa and love out my Outrun dream. 
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Mar 21, 2018 01:36
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mummynapkin posted:I'd buy Pepsi Co. and order a halt on all Pepsi products and produce only Pepsi Blue. YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6YMPAH67f4o |
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Mar 21, 2018 01:49
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I would buy up all the auto manufacturers and force them to change the sounds that car horns make. they would still be loud, for safety in an emergency, but they would yell something extremely embarrassing about the driver . . . you know, body odor, weird genitals, low standardized test scores, fondness for nickelback . . . so they would not be used unless absolutely necessary. existing cars would be retrofitted under penalty of the owner being legally renamed by internet poll. motorcycles would be modified to either purr like kittens or constantly say "waka waka waka" like fozzie bear |
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Mar 21, 2018 02:35
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Manifisto posted:I would buy up all the auto manufacturers and force them to change the sounds that car horns make. they would still be loud, for safety in an emergency, but they would yell something extremely embarrassing about the driver . . . you know, body odor, weird genitals, low standardized test scores, fondness for nickelback . . . so they would not be used unless absolutely necessary. existing cars would be retrofitted under penalty of the owner being legally renamed by internet poll. Along these lines, I'd spend every last dime I had to do something to disable all car horns that honk when you lock the doors. Come on people . . . not everybody in a 1/4 mile radius needs to know you locked your loving doors! They make a nice, satisfying clunk sound when they lock. That's all you need.
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Mar 21, 2018 03:15
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i'd invest in the LA Beast so he could open a dispensary in CA and quit abusing his body. stay safe LA Beast ilu
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Mar 21, 2018 04:53
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Scroon posted:How rich we talkin here? Like Ritchie Rich rich. Like so rich you could rename Dubai to Monopoly Man town and the owners of Dubai would be like thank you for renaming our town you have so much more money than we do.
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Mar 21, 2018 06:09
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If I was rich I would revive the Blockbuster chain of video rental stores in every major U.S city. The stores would only appeal to ironic hipsters and people who only watch 1 or 2 movies a year and don't want to pay a monthly fee and the company would operate at a huge loss but it's important to remember the 1990s. Back in my day we gave paper money to guys in costumes for the permission to take home ancient discs with movie codes on them so our video machines could show us The Phantom Menace in our house dens or "yurts". You olds and too youngs these days are punks.
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Mar 21, 2018 06:27
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all day long I'd biddy biddy bum |
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Mar 21, 2018 07:34
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I would go to space. I don't even care what happens after I get there |
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Mar 21, 2018 08:46
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if i was rich i'd buy the rights to Anime from japan and turn it into a beloved live-action sitcom, but in the last episode i'd reveal that a significant chunk of the show didn't happen and it was all part of a novel written after a dramatic life event, then i'd wait two decades and announce a new season, leading everyone to speculate as to how i was going to deal with the massive retcon that destroyed the canon of the original show |
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Mar 21, 2018 09:15
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edit: it was too edgy for yob also not true I'd be a garbage engineer and build things from trash. Cyberpunkey Monkey fucked around with this message at 18:39 on Mar 22, 2018 ---------------- |
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Mar 21, 2018 10:16
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id smoke weed and watch hey arnold
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Mar 21, 2018 10:23
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Koishi Komeiji posted:Like Ritchie Rich rich. Like so rich you could rename Dubai to Monopoly Man town and the owners of Dubai would be like thank you for renaming our town you have so much more money than we do.  cool animals island!?!? |
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Mar 21, 2018 11:44
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treasure planet 2
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Mar 21, 2018 23:08
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420 SWAGLORD posted:I would go to space. I don't even care what happens after I get there what a coincidence I would also send u into space  except I would care |
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Mar 21, 2018 23:24
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redm posted:id smoke weed and watch hey arnold this is wywd if you were rich, not wywd if you had every last dollar on earth ---------------- |
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Mar 22, 2018 00:00
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this thread is triggering i can only think of serious real answers |
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Mar 22, 2018 01:28
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I'd buy InfoWars, rename it to InfoPeace and donate it to a Good And Wholesome charity that could use the signal boost.
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Mar 22, 2018 01:35
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sig by Prof. Crocodile
BYOB spells: Mutually Assured Kindness
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I'd also bring back Showbiz Pizza and only I, or someone i choose, would be allowed to play After Burner. The one you actually sit in and it moves, not that bullshit one you stand in front of.
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Mar 22, 2018 01:38
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All I wanna do is zooma, zoom zoom zoom And a poom-poom just shake ya rump
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Mar 22, 2018 01:50
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I would pay for my favorite bands to reunite, play poorly rehearsed comeback shows in my town for one night only and id host them in my backyard for free. |
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Mar 22, 2018 02:34
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lmbo calrissian posted:this thread is triggering I gave a serious real answer.
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Mar 22, 2018 02:43
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Koishi Komeiji posted:Drive like 100mph to my crappy job so I'm not late anymore and just pay off all the speeding tickets cash like whatever I'm rich. why would you still be going to that crappy job ---------------- |
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Mar 22, 2018 02:52
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how rich a re we talkin here
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Mar 22, 2018 02:52
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i would get a special surgery to make it so when i clap my hands it sounds like a duck quack instead of a clap
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Mar 22, 2018 02:54
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once I told someone that and they said "there's not even a box for you to think outside of, is there?"
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Mar 22, 2018 02:55
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I think I would enjoy inventing some faux historical piece of pop culture and gaslighting the public into believing it was authentic, like that "good old shoe" song from wag the dog. except I'd encode something funny into it like goatse or some other classic meme. man when the public found out about it they would be so much happier I spent my time and money that way instead of curing cancer or whatever other boring crap people say. |
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Mar 22, 2018 03:10
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https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png |
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Mar 22, 2018 03:31
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HUSKY DILF posted:All I wanna do is zooma, zoom zoom zoom all I wanna do is [gunshot gunshot gunshot gunshot cash register noise]
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Mar 22, 2018 05:39
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I'd probably buy a nerf gun. I mean that's not all I would do, not even close, but among other things I would probably buy a nerf gun.
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Mar 22, 2018 18:01
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Doctor Dogballs posted:why would you still be going to that crappy job |
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Mar 22, 2018 18:35
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Doctor Dogballs posted:why would you still be going to that crappy job Eh, it's a living 
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Mar 22, 2018 18:52
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Buy up all the fat unhealthy foods sold in poor neighborhoods and throw it all in the trash so people won't get fat anymore. Construct a massive 9,000,000 ton air conditioner the size of L.A. to counter global warming's effects. Buy every homeless person a laptop with bitcoin mining software so they won't be poor anymore. Oh and you're welcome 
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Mar 22, 2018 19:31
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