Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us $3,400 per month for bandwidth bills alone, and since we don't believe in shoving popup ads to our registered users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
«43 »
  • Post
  • Reply
Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Your friendly croctopus overlord LP'er

Dungeon Master. A digging too deep CYOA

A thousand years ago, the philosopher Kariman published his greatest work, On Heroes and Greatness. Even he would have no idea how he would change the world. in it he showed through history that the people who had the greatest effect on the course of history were not the generals or the kings, but the heroes and villains that kept popping up again and again. They were the people who held the most value in the world.
The text was widely read, even by the commonest people in the kingdom, and fearing a revolution, one king announced that instead of marrying his only daughter off to secure a political alliance, he would marry her to the hero who could rid him of a troublesome cult.

The band of heroes that defeated the cultists uncovered a vast conspiracy and saved the world. The new prince and his companions, (History does not record how the adventurers decided which of their number gained the hand of the princess, but the others did not fare badly) settled into the kingdom and assumed key roles. They defeated other threats and issued in a golden age.
Other kingdoms saw this, and imitated them, and soon every kingdom was marrying their heirs to Wizards, Fighters and Rogues. A single hero could turn the course of a battle defeat a necromancer or confound a evil god, and the more famous the Hero, the most offers of marriage or position they would gain. Hero academies sprang up across the globe as people tried to become the next big thing.

Then there was the Villain shortage of 569.
The Heroes had been to efficient, and any small cult found itself wiped out before they even got part way into their plans for world domination. Anyone who even looked like they were about to take a step down the path of the villain lead to a small army of adventures turning up on their doorstep five minutes after they thought of their evil plan.
This was followed by witch hunts, and nations that had long held truces and alliances against the evil threats began to war amongst themselves, wars much more violent and destructive than any orc invasion.

The Wizard Doldrun took things into his own hands. He cast a mighty spell and sealed off a huge island known now as the Dark Isle. Here anyone with darkness in their souls could train safely. They could then return to the world if they wished and carry out their evil plots, but many preferred to stay on the Dark Isle, where they were not hunted down and killed on sight.
After a while, Doldrun gathered the kingdoms, and informed them that he would unleash evil upon the world if they paid him a sum of money. The rulers of the kingdoms were shocked for a few minutes, but as the Wizard continued, they saw the wisdom in his plan.

This is the world you live in. Where evil is drip fed into the world. Kingdoms save money up to hire some form of threat to them - it allows great heroes to save the world, the economy to be re balanced and the peasants to be kept in place. The Dark Isle is now a wealthy place, where the inhabitants want for little. Anyone with greatness in them is found at a young age and taken in by either a hero guild or the Dungeon Master academy, depending on how seers scry their soul.

quote:

Youíve done it. Itís taken eight years of your life, but you have finally graduated from the Dungeon Master academy! In your hand is the scroll that licenses you to build and maintain dungeons in the Goodlands and scheme and plot to the letter of your contract.

But who are you?


Welcome to yet another CYOA! This one will be following someone building a dungeon in a fantasy world. I expect this to end up fairly humorous, but who knows!


1) Name - This is pretty simple, what should our Dungeon master be called.

2) Race - Human? Orc? Elf? Something else?

3) Academics - what is you Dungeon Masters in?

a) Architecture - You just want to build something the world will never forget, or at least quake in fear of.
b) Management - You are a people person, and know how to get the best from them. Happy minions are productive minions.
c) Monstrology. - You are a fan of all things monstrous, and know how to keep the more interesting creatures happy.
d) Magic. - A master of the mystical arts, are you.
e) Combat - Thunking Hard. Grog hit things with sword. Paper app-arent-ly say Grog good at it.
f) Something else...

4) What was our minor in?

a) Architecture - Knowing how to not have the dungeon fall down might be a good thing.
b) Management - The staff are important. Maybe you should know how to keep them happy.
c) Monstrology. - you know which end of the demigorgon to avoid.
d) Magic. - Youíve dabbled in magic. Itís always useful.
e) Combat - being able to handle a blade is better than getting stabbed in the gut by a rebellious daughter who has just fallen for the dashing hero.
f) Something else...

5) What is your weak subject? No one is good at everything.

a) Architecture - Who cares what the place looks like?
b) Management - Youíve never been much of a people person.
c) Monstrology. - Iíve got these allergies you seeÖ.
d) Magic. - The only thing youíve ever managed to turn into a toad is yourself...
e) Combat - PLEASE DONíT HIT ME ANY MORE!
f) Something else...

6) What job are you looking for?

a) They will pay for this - Some personal grudge has driven you on this path. Now you are returning with a burning desire to be bad. The world is your oyster, but there is little protection.
b) Tenure - There are always grants going for evil doers, maybe one of those is the way to go? There will be some stipulations in the contract, but beyond that you are free to go. You may or not gain personal protection.
c) Subcontracting - There are some powerful villains out there who are in need of good staff. While there is less creative control, the wages are good and the hours a bit more sociable. You would be in control of a project with some oversight. Most of the time you will be spared by heros under the law.
d) Apprenticeship - and Archvillain wants a henchman, and you are up for the job of being a Grand vizier. The boss will be looking over your shoulder at all times, but there will always be some advice on hand. Plus you were just following orders!
e) Something elseÖ..

Those will do for now, weíll do another round to explore what these open up in a bit.


The Story so far....



The Pyramid of Oppertunities.
Interview with a Dwarf.
Everythingís better, down where itís wetter.
Construction begins.
I've got Crabs, Man.

Grey Hunter fucked around with this message at Apr 20, 2018 around 11:11

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Barbed Tongues
Mar 16, 2012



1) Name - Talia Breakwater
2) Race - Aquatic Elf
3) Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Architecture
4) Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Monstrology
5) Academics (Weakness) - Magic
6) Dream Job - Subcontracting

Traditional dungeons were getting passe. Stale. Uninspiring. And most of the prime real-estates were already taken up by more famous, more connected (or more dastardly) masters.

Elevator Pitch: Water dungeons

So much seaside opportunity, so much potential for new traps, puzzles - fights in three dimensions without needing costly air spells. Imagine - starting with an old lighthouse tower - going deeper to reveal undergeround seas, deeper still to the live coral mazes, deeper still to ... well, they'd see.

We can make something amazing. And maybe one day - we might be given our own entire island to populate, staff and orchestrate! *amateur evil laugh*

sheep-dodger
Feb 21, 2013



We're Samna, a Gorgon who's done her Dungeon Master's in 3B Management with a minor in 4A Architecture, though we're bad at 5E Combat. We're looking for a 6B Tenure position.

PoultryGeist
Feb 26, 2013

Crystals?

1) Name - Jannie 'Monster Master' Cooper
2) Race - Mostly Human
The family says Great-Granddad Cooper was just *really* ugly, but I'm sure he was an orc. How else do you explain the grey pallor and little tusks?
3) Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Monstrology (C)
4) Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Architecture (A)
5) Academics (Weakness) - Magic
(D)
6) Job - Other: Monster Preservation
Did you know there are only 8 breeding pairs of chimeras left in the Goodlands? Magical experimentation and re-introduction from the Dark Isle can't keep up with the rate most monsters are being vanquished, someone must set up a sanctuary on this side of the Straits of Doom. And that someone is me, Jannie Cooper. I mean me, Monster Master!

PoultryGeist fucked around with this message at Apr 12, 2018 around 12:25

LLSix
Jan 20, 2010

The real power behind countless overlords


Name Honest Jane
Race Human
Dungeon Master of DRAMA! - We are masters of the seven insidious facts to make men flee and the three perfect words to steal a demihumans heart. Not to mention the very latest in fashionable plays and poems. Yes, the diploma does spell it in all caps. No, the exclamation mark is not optional. Say it with feeling!
Dungeon Minor of Management
We are laughably bad at Combat
We would love to put on evil plays to stir up peasant revolts on something but will probably be stuck Subcontracting as a thief guild master. Robbing from the poor to give to the rich king or something else cliche. Ugh. Not to mention overused.

I have to admit I like the water dungeon idea too.

LLSix fucked around with this message at Apr 12, 2018 around 12:35

Piell
Sep 3, 2006



1) Name - Tolis Axebeard
2) Race - Dwarf
3) Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Architecture
4) Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Management
5) Academics (Weakness) - Magic
6) Dream Job - I must dig deep, for that is what dwarves are for. Also that's where the magma is

Abyssal Squid
Jul 23, 2003
"I even think "Medicare for all" is pretty bad policy...I say that as a Medicaid recipient"

(Fuck you, got mine.)


1) Name - Debbie
2) Race - Star Elf
3) Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Magic
4) Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Managenent
5) Academics (Weakness) - Architecture
6) Dream Job - They Will Pay: During training, Visiting Dungeon Master Ms. Frost pushed Debbie's friend "Black Leaf" Marcie too hard. Ruined physically and psychically, Marcie killed herself. This is not how villains are supposed to act on the Dark Isle!

Crazycryodude
Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?







PoultryGeist posted:

1) Name - Jannie 'Monster Master' Cooper
2) Race - Mostly Human
The family says Great-Granddad Cooper was just *really* ugly, but I'm sure he was an orc. How else do you explain the grey pallor and little tusks?
3) Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Monstrology (C)
4) Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Architecture (A)
5) Academics (Weakness) - Magic
(D)
6) Job - Other: Monster Preservation
Did you know there are only 8 breeding pairs of chimeras left in the Goodlands? Magical experimentation and re-introduction from the Dark Isle can't keep up with the rate most monsters are being vanquished, someone must set up a sanctuary on this side of the Straits of Doom. And that someone is me, Jannie Cooper. I mean me, Monster Master!

Ooo I like this

Chatrapati
Nov 6, 2012


1) Aster

2) Minotaur

3) Architecture - You just want to build something the world will never forget, or at least quake in fear of.

4) Combat - being able to handle a blade is better than getting stabbed in the gut by a rebellious daughter who has just fallen for the dashing hero.

5) Magic. - The only thing youíve ever managed to turn into a toad is yourself...

6) Tenure - There are always grants going for evil doers, maybe one of those is the way to go? There will be some stipulations in the contract, but beyond that you are free to go. You may or not gain personal protection.

A labyrinth can be so much more than what our old lecturers made them out to be! We need to strive for new and bold architectural designs; mirrors, portals, non-euclidean pathways... A labyrinth can be art.

Triskelli
Sep 26, 2011

I AM A SKELETON
WITH VERY HIGH
STANDARDS





1) Name - Mallus The Undying
2) Race - Human Lich (pre-op)
3) Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Magic
4) Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Theater
5) Academics (Weakness) - Architecture
6) Dream Job - Tenure

Gentlemen, what separates the cutpurses and crime bosses from the truly great villains?

PRESENTATION!

For one low, low price of *choghplem*, you can purchase the incomparable services of I, MALUS THE UNDYING! Youíll never need another villain! Iíll turn your townís crypt into a cavalcade of corpses, and sustain your hero economy for centuries to come!

*well rehearsed evil laugh*

Hmm? My skin? Well I plan to transition to a full lich once I get settled in. Itís a major unlife step and I donít want to rush into it. Plus Iíve got a fantastic makeup team in the interim. Now sign here and my prop guys- prop skelet- ARMY OF SKELETONS can begin setting up a dungeon within a month. d-Donít touch those spike traps! They are very real and not at all plywood. Very deadly, very expensive.

...



(Also throwing support for Talia Breakwater or the Monster Master)

Triskelli fucked around with this message at Apr 12, 2018 around 16:48

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



Name: Overlord
Race: Dolphin
Academy: Dolphin Kindergarten

Major: Architecture: Dungeon Waterpark

Minor: Themepark Management

Weak: Combat

Job: Themepark Overlord

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...they shall march out of my laboratory and sweep away every adversary, every creed, every nation, until the very planet is in the loving grip of the Pax Bisonica. And then peace will reign, and the world, and all humanity, shall bow to me in humble gratitude...

sheep-dodger posted:

We're Samna, a Gorgon who's done her Dungeon Master's in 3B Management with a minor in 4A Architecture, though we're bad at 5E Combat. We're looking for a 6B Tenure position.

Sure

Rockopolis
Dec 21, 2012

I MAKE FUN OF QUEER STORYGAMES BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH MY LIFE THAN MAKE OTHER PEOPLE CRY

I can't understand these kinds of games, and not getting it bugs me almost as much as me being weird


1_: Rex Gladio
2_: Dwarven
3E: Combat
4B: Management
5A: Architecture
6A: They will pay for this
A masked dwarven warrior, a hero turned heel, swearing vengeance for the Menzoberranzan screwjob. Will probably put together a stable and subcontract in the mean time.

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

you're a flower. you're also a rainbow and a river. you are the manifestation of all perfection and i want to i don't fucking know, but you are fucking perfect


Name: Leovan Kemaris
Race: High Elf
Major: Finance/Accounting - If you can't properly manage your money, things can fall apart faster than you realize.
Minor: Magic - Sometimes you need a little help in negotiations...or a quick escape plan.
Weakness: Management - What do you mean the workers can't just be looked at as resources to expend as we need to? They should be happy to be working for one of the highborn in the first place.
Dream Job: CFO (Chief Financial Officer) - Look, I'm not sure you realize how much it costs to run a successful dungeon. There's material costs, food, worker upkeep, horde allocation...we can't loot and steal everything. Besides, everyone know what the true root of evil is.

JesterOfAmerica
Sep 11, 2015



Name: Vio Lane
Race: Tiefling
Major:Magic
Minor: Combat
Weakness: Architecture
Dream Job: Tenure

I told my sister that she needed to take things slow, but no she had to go full blast. Now thanks to her I need to go and show the world why the Lane name needs to be respected in the arts of Dungeons, not meager heroics!

Nephzinho
Jan 24, 2008



1) Name - Boris Underhill
2) Race - Halfling
3) Academics - Management
4) Minor - Monstrology
5) Weak - Combat
6) Job? - Tenure

Years of bullying from the BBGs with their scythes and armors has steered Boris' life towards the art of creating more dangerous dungeons and getting monsters to do what he can't. Boris has been known to leave "design flaws" in his blueprints when it comes to designing for those who have slighted him in the past, resulting in occasional adventurers finding secret passages leading directly to the unsuspecting brute's lair.

Nephzinho fucked around with this message at Apr 12, 2018 around 16:27

Splicer
Oct 16, 2006

from hell's heart I stab at thee

Name: Guy Barkwood Barkwood's Humanoid and Humanoid-Adjacent Solutions pleased to make your acquaintance
Race:: Shifty Elf
Major: Management
Minor:: Monsterology
Weakness: Architecture
Dream Job: Sub-contractor

It's not what you know, it's who you know. And I know people. I mean I know a lot of people and I also understand people. You want some skeletons? I know a lich. Well, pre-lich. Need a chimera? I got a key if you got a distraction. You need some dwarves? Don't be stupid nobody needs dwarves. Trust me you want to get in on the ground floor here, 'cos this time next year if you need a guy, I'll be the guy. Guy Barkwood.

(Throwing my vote for Monster Master)

Splicer fucked around with this message at Apr 12, 2018 around 16:26

Quorum
Sep 24, 2014

REMIND ME AGAIN HOW THE LITTLE HORSE-SHAPED ONES MOVE?

Name: Hugh Mann Wizzard

Race: Definitely a human and not three gnome wizards stacked up inside a robe. He's been quite clear on this point. His voice is very squeaky though. And his beard is suspiciously luxurious.

Major: Magic. Hugh demonstrates great aptitude in a number of schools of magic-- more so, in fact, than should ordinarily be possible for one mage. Clearly he is an arcane prodigy of high degree!

Minor: Architecture. The Mathematica Arcane seem easily transferring to dungeon engineering. And anyway, wizards are known to love towers.

Weakness: Combat. Hugh avoided gym class like the plague, and always had a signed note from his mother, Rea Sponsible Adult Wizzard, excusing him from anything that might require him to move at anything faster than a dignified glide.

Dream Job: Tenure. The Dark Lord Fellowship is very competitive, but with a creative enough application...

Triskelli
Sep 26, 2011

I AM A SKELETON
WITH VERY HIGH
STANDARDS


The OP is a little sparse on structure; weíre picking one bad guy to follow for the CYOA, right? Practicing my maniacal laugh either way

https://youtu.be/R6MlHxAzLXA

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Your friendly croctopus overlord LP'er

Yeah. On guy. So not much consesus so far. That tends to change after a while though.

cigaw
Sep 13, 2012




1. Name - Ifnkovhgroghprm, the Avatar of Annoyance
2. Race - Preternatural Old Man Gnome
3. Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Annoyance
4. Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Magic
5. Academics (Weakness) - Combat
6. Dream Job - Tenure

Huh? Whatsit? You need a villain? I may be able to help you if you can only guess my name through a nonsensical riddle that defies all logic! Also, bring me 20 sewer-rat tails.

Bah, fine. Here's my business card. Ifnkovhgroghprm - the Avatar of Annoyance, DM at your service. I specialize in having the pesky heroes defeat themselves.

A little bit of magic, a hefty dose vexation and enough exasperation to choke a half-dragon donkey will win the day! Need eternal double-back corridors? Myriad riddles of varying frustrating degrees? Puzzles with hair-pulling self-referencing laws with the solution hidden in plain sight? I can get you that and more!

For my Dungeon Master's thesis I actually designed a small, self-resetting dungeon that caused the simulated party to turn on one another within 3 riddles. The Paladin actually killed himself at the end because he couldn't solve the puzzle to open the door. He was pulling and pushing and trying to sell his soul to any Abyssal entity who would listen and - here's the kicker - it was an unlocked sliding door! Haw!

So, you young whippersnapper, give me the job and the job solves itself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get to my PhD classes - we're running a lab on broken and unfinished questlines.

Hexenritter
May 20, 2001

Buncha slack-jawed faggots around here

cigaw posted:



1. Name - Ifnkovhgroghprm, the Avatar of Annoyance
2. Race - Preternatural Old Man Gnome
3. Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Annoyance
4. Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Magic
5. Academics (Weakness) - Combat
6. Dream Job - Tenure

Huh? Whatsit? You need a villain? I may be able to help you if you can only guess my name through a nonsensical riddle that defies all logic! Also, bring me 20 sewer-rat tails.

Bah, fine. Here's my business card. Ifnkovhgroghprm - the Avatar of Annoyance, DM at your service. I specialize in having the pesky heroes defeat themselves.

A little bit of magic, a hefty dose vexation and enough exasperation to choke a half-dragon donkey will win the day! Need eternal double-back corridors? Myriad riddles of varying frustrating degrees? Puzzles with hair-pulling self-referencing laws with the solution hidden in plain sight? I can get you that and more!

For my Dungeon Master's thesis I actually designed a small, self-resetting dungeon that caused the simulated party to turn on one another within 3 riddles. The Paladin actually killed himself at the end because he couldn't solve the puzzle to open the door. He was pulling and pushing and trying to sell his soul to any Abyssal entity who would listen and - here's the kicker - it was an unlocked sliding door! Haw!

So, you young whippersnapper, give me the job and the job solves itself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get to my PhD classes - we're running a lab on broken and unfinished questlines.

I was suffering a major choice paralysis (and you should all be proud of such great ideas) but this just broke it. +1

Hexenritter fucked around with this message at Apr 12, 2018 around 21:31

Bee Bonk
Feb 19, 2011





1)Sarga Scrawgill
2)Tide-kin You've been called, among other things, sea-goblin, scrag, haglet, saltgob, squidtaur, soglin, and octobutt, but you're just tide-kin. You do have an octobutt, technically.
3)C - Monstrology Alchemically mutating monsters and breeding chimerae is your passion. Having a humanoid upper body and a mollusk lower body might give you a bit more affinity for the discipline, but all you know is you're damned good at it, and it's fun!
4)A- Architecture No one appreciates a good water dungeon because most of them suck. Oh, a water level puzzle. Oh, a big fish. Making a good one takes know-how, and you've got a bit of that.
5)E - Combat You're on the small side and a bit awkward on land; but why fight when you've got a carefully-engineered wrecking crew to handle that?
6)C - Subcontracting A good overlord knows how to delegate, and that means it falls to you to make a proper water dungeon with a proper set of mutant chimerae.

Hexenritter
May 20, 2001

Buncha slack-jawed faggots around here

Bee Bonk posted:



1)Sarga Scrawgill
2)Tide-kin You've been called, among other things, sea-goblin, scrag, haglet, saltgob, squidtaur, soglin, and octobutt, but you're just tide-kin. You do have an octobutt, technically.
3)C - Monstrology Alchemically mutating monsters and breeding chimerae is your passion. Having a humanoid upper body and a mollusk lower body might give you a bit more affinity for the discipline, but all you know is you're damned good at it, and it's fun!
4)A- Architecture No one appreciates a good water dungeon because most of them suck. Oh, a water level puzzle. Oh, a big fish. Making a good one takes know-how, and you've got a bit of that.
5)E - Combat You're on the small side and a bit awkward on land; but why fight when you've got a carefully-engineered wrecking crew to handle that?
6)C - Subcontracting A good overlord knows how to delegate, and that means it falls to you to make a proper water dungeon with a proper set of mutant chimerae.

Ok, sorry other dude I'm going to have to modify my vote.

voting Sarga

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010

Q.E.D.



change to vote sarga. We need to breed killer dolphin.

cigaw
Sep 13, 2012


Hexenritter posted:

I was suffering a major choice paralysis (and you should all be proud of such great ideas) but this just broke it. +1


Hexenritter posted:

Ok, sorry other dude I'm going to have to modify my vote.

voting Sarga


No worries, man! Lots of fun entries here and it is hard to resist the lure of the octobutt.

Right now I really like Mallus, the pre-op Lich.

Hex: Kenji would also vote for Octo, so it's ok

Hexenritter
May 20, 2001

Buncha slack-jawed faggots around here


Now i feel mean, sorry buddy

quote:

No worries, man! Lots of fun entries here and it is hard to resist the lure of the octobutt.



Hex: Kenji would also vote for Octo, so it's ok

aww yeah threadbuddy gets it

Speleothing
May 6, 2008

Spare batteries are pretty key.

Fun Shoe

Chatrapati posted:

1) Aster

2) Minotaur

3) Architecture - You just want to build something the world will never forget, or at least quake in fear of.

4) Combat - being able to handle a blade is better than getting stabbed in the gut by a rebellious daughter who has just fallen for the dashing hero.

5) Magic. - The only thing youíve ever managed to turn into a toad is yourself...

6) Tenure - There are always grants going for evil doers, maybe one of those is the way to go? There will be some stipulations in the contract, but beyond that you are free to go. You may or not gain personal protection.

A labyrinth can be so much more than what our old lecturers made them out to be! We need to strive for new and bold architectural designs; mirrors, portals, non-euclidean pathways... A labyrinth can be art.

Voting for this, but wouldnít it make a bit more sense to vote for our favorites in each question.



For example, I like the idea of focusing on the dungeon architecture or the monsters, but would prefer to have a grudge, and not suck at magic.

malbogio
Jan 19, 2015


Bee Bonk posted:



1)Sarga Scrawgill
2)Tide-kin You've been called, among other things, sea-goblin, scrag, haglet, saltgob, squidtaur, soglin, and octobutt, but you're just tide-kin. You do have an octobutt, technically.
3)C - Monstrology Alchemically mutating monsters and breeding chimerae is your passion. Having a humanoid upper body and a mollusk lower body might give you a bit more affinity for the discipline, but all you know is you're damned good at it, and it's fun!
4)A- Architecture No one appreciates a good water dungeon because most of them suck. Oh, a water level puzzle. Oh, a big fish. Making a good one takes know-how, and you've got a bit of that.
5)E - Combat You're on the small side and a bit awkward on land; but why fight when you've got a carefully-engineered wrecking crew to handle that?
6)C - Subcontracting A good overlord knows how to delegate, and that means it falls to you to make a proper water dungeon with a proper set of mutant chimerae.

+1

Helical Nightmares
Apr 30, 2009


Oh boy, another fantastic Grey Hunter production!



Bee Bonk posted:



1)Sarga Scrawgill
2)Tide-kin You've been called, among other things, sea-goblin, scrag, haglet, saltgob, squidtaur, soglin, and octobutt, but you're just tide-kin. You do have an octobutt, technically.
3)C - Monstrology Alchemically mutating monsters and breeding chimerae is your passion. Having a humanoid upper body and a mollusk lower body might give you a bit more affinity for the discipline, but all you know is you're damned good at it, and it's fun!
4)A- Architecture No one appreciates a good water dungeon because most of them suck. Oh, a water level puzzle. Oh, a big fish. Making a good one takes know-how, and you've got a bit of that.
5)E - Combat You're on the small side and a bit awkward on land; but why fight when you've got a carefully-engineered wrecking crew to handle that?
6)C - Subcontracting A good overlord knows how to delegate, and that means it falls to you to make a proper water dungeon with a proper set of mutant chimerae.

Octobutt! Octobutt!

Epicurius
Apr 10, 2010


Malus or Samna. I want tenure, drat it!

Ralith
Jan 12, 2011

I see a ship in the harbor
I can and shall obey
But if it wasn't for your misfortune
I'd be a heavenly person today


cigaw posted:



1. Name - Ifnkovhgroghprm, the Avatar of Annoyance
2. Race - Preternatural Old Man Gnome
3. Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Annoyance
4. Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Magic
5. Academics (Weakness) - Combat
6. Dream Job - Tenure

Huh? Whatsit? You need a villain? I may be able to help you if you can only guess my name through a nonsensical riddle that defies all logic! Also, bring me 20 sewer-rat tails.

Bah, fine. Here's my business card. Ifnkovhgroghprm - the Avatar of Annoyance, DM at your service. I specialize in having the pesky heroes defeat themselves.

A little bit of magic, a hefty dose vexation and enough exasperation to choke a half-dragon donkey will win the day! Need eternal double-back corridors? Myriad riddles of varying frustrating degrees? Puzzles with hair-pulling self-referencing laws with the solution hidden in plain sight? I can get you that and more!

For my Dungeon Master's thesis I actually designed a small, self-resetting dungeon that caused the simulated party to turn on one another within 3 riddles. The Paladin actually killed himself at the end because he couldn't solve the puzzle to open the door. He was pulling and pushing and trying to sell his soul to any Abyssal entity who would listen and - here's the kicker - it was an unlocked sliding door! Haw!

So, you young whippersnapper, give me the job and the job solves itself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get to my PhD classes - we're running a lab on broken and unfinished questlines.

This sounds delightful

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Your friendly croctopus overlord LP'er

Sarga is winning with 5 votes at the moment, but I'll give it a little longer for people to change votes - Ifnkovhgroghprm, Gorgon, Malus and Aster all have 2 votes if I'm reading this right.

Lots of good suggestions though! All would be fun to play!

Splicer
Oct 16, 2006

from hell's heart I stab at thee

I'm so torn between Monster Master and That One DM right now.

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

No need to sign, we'll take care of that.


Lipstick Apathy

cigaw posted:



1. Name - Ifnkovhgroghprm, the Avatar of Annoyance
2. Race - Preternatural Old Man Gnome
3. Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Annoyance
4. Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Magic
5. Academics (Weakness) - Combat
6. Dream Job - Tenure

Huh? Whatsit? You need a villain? I may be able to help you if you can only guess my name through a nonsensical riddle that defies all logic! Also, bring me 20 sewer-rat tails.

Bah, fine. Here's my business card. Ifnkovhgroghprm - the Avatar of Annoyance, DM at your service. I specialize in having the pesky heroes defeat themselves.

A little bit of magic, a hefty dose vexation and enough exasperation to choke a half-dragon donkey will win the day! Need eternal double-back corridors? Myriad riddles of varying frustrating degrees? Puzzles with hair-pulling self-referencing laws with the solution hidden in plain sight? I can get you that and more!

For my Dungeon Master's thesis I actually designed a small, self-resetting dungeon that caused the simulated party to turn on one another within 3 riddles. The Paladin actually killed himself at the end because he couldn't solve the puzzle to open the door. He was pulling and pushing and trying to sell his soul to any Abyssal entity who would listen and - here's the kicker - it was an unlocked sliding door! Haw!

So, you young whippersnapper, give me the job and the job solves itself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get to my PhD classes - we're running a lab on broken and unfinished questlines.

+1

Liquid Cannibalism
Mar 9, 2004

Delicious and Nutritious



Fun Shoe

Malus gets my first vote, but Sarga is a close second.

Lots of great ideas in here, it's hard to pick!

DivineCoffeeBinge
Mar 3, 2011

Spider-Man's Amazing Construction Company


cigaw posted:



1. Name - Ifnkovhgroghprm, the Avatar of Annoyance
2. Race - Preternatural Old Man Gnome
3. Academics (Dungeon Masters) - Annoyance
4. Academics (Dungeon Minor) - Magic
5. Academics (Weakness) - Combat
6. Dream Job - Tenure

Huh? Whatsit? You need a villain? I may be able to help you if you can only guess my name through a nonsensical riddle that defies all logic! Also, bring me 20 sewer-rat tails.

Bah, fine. Here's my business card. Ifnkovhgroghprm - the Avatar of Annoyance, DM at your service. I specialize in having the pesky heroes defeat themselves.

A little bit of magic, a hefty dose vexation and enough exasperation to choke a half-dragon donkey will win the day! Need eternal double-back corridors? Myriad riddles of varying frustrating degrees? Puzzles with hair-pulling self-referencing laws with the solution hidden in plain sight? I can get you that and more!

For my Dungeon Master's thesis I actually designed a small, self-resetting dungeon that caused the simulated party to turn on one another within 3 riddles. The Paladin actually killed himself at the end because he couldn't solve the puzzle to open the door. He was pulling and pushing and trying to sell his soul to any Abyssal entity who would listen and - here's the kicker - it was an unlocked sliding door! Haw!

So, you young whippersnapper, give me the job and the job solves itself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get to my PhD classes - we're running a lab on broken and unfinished questlines.

Voting for this so hard

Epicurius
Apr 10, 2010


Changing my vote to Ifnkovhgroghprm. Well, and Malus, because I like liches.

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Your friendly croctopus overlord LP'er

Here comes Ifnkovhgroghprm up the outside, now riding 5 to 5 with Sarga.

Mallus is dropping behind on 3.....

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Shogeton
Apr 26, 2007

"Little by little the old world crumbled, and not once did the king imagine that some of the pieces might fall on him"

Gonna go with Sarga It's better down where it's wetter.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply
«43 »