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AE This is it, our big reveal moment
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Mar 25, 2019 14:07
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I feel like ABC are all the same thing and the natural choice. We can't reveal ourselves -- remember, both armies think we are the devil.
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Mar 25, 2019 14:16
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E is going to be terrible optics, to have our side be led by the literal devil. Also Sarga isn't specced for combat, we need to go with A
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Mar 25, 2019 14:59
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AC, while we start killing their priests in the back with magic and an egg as well for maximum confusion
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Mar 25, 2019 15:07
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F. Port in some Crabbersons as a Heavy Infantry honor guard for our Asherah. They're tough enough and odd looking enough to make an impact. Wait for the right moment to airdrop a big-rear end school of stinging jellies into the middle ranks, complete with the seawater.
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Mar 25, 2019 15:12
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Eggs aren't going to hatch and just be killer beasts, they'll take time and effort to grow. They are definitely for slipping into a warm sewer or something where we're setting up poo poo weeks or months out.
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Mar 25, 2019 15:22
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This is a god fight, we are a devil. If anything, we should fake some attacks coming from the Imperial side. Make it look like he's shooting shark rays that just bounce off our Asherah.
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Mar 25, 2019 15:37
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There's something to be said for appearing on the battlefield against our asherah, giving fakesherah a high five and announcing 'yes! Now let's kill that rival of mine once and for all!' and just slapstick goofballing attacks that amount to massive collateral damage against fakesherah's side.
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Mar 25, 2019 16:06
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Outrail posted:There's something to be said for appearing on the battlefield against our asherah, giving fakesherah a high five and announcing 'yes! Now let's kill that rival of mine once and for all!' and just slapstick goofballing attacks that amount to massive collateral damage against fakesherah's side. This
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Mar 25, 2019 16:15
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I agree, there's nothing better than making ourselves look like a total doofus while trying to secretly build up our own following of believers.
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Mar 25, 2019 17:26
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Outrail posted:There's something to be said for appearing on the battlefield against our asherah, giving fakesherah a high five and announcing 'yes! Now let's kill that rival of mine once and for all!' and just slapstick goofballing attacks that amount to massive collateral damage against fakesherah's side. Vote: +1; sure, why not. Just not too 'goofball' as we still want to be taken seriously as The Devil and we don't want our followers to think we're a joke.
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Mar 25, 2019 20:33
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Outrail posted:There's something to be said for appearing on the battlefield against our asherah, giving fakesherah a high five and announcing 'yes! Now let's kill that rival of mine once and for all!' and just slapstick goofballing attacks that amount to massive collateral damage against fakesherah's side. This kills the cult.
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Mar 25, 2019 21:09
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Volmarias posted:This kills the cult. I see what you did there. AB
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Mar 25, 2019 21:24
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Telefrag their Asherah with an Obsidionzilla exploding from within.
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Mar 25, 2019 23:49
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IcePhoenix posted:I agree, there's nothing better than making ourselves look like a total doofus while trying to secretly build up our own following of believers. Well not goofballing, but making a few 'mistakes' before an inevitable crowing betrayal and blinking out could be a great nudge for realsherah, a slap in the face to the dumb dumb fakesherah who needs worship and it'd solidify our position as 'evil sister to asherah but ultimately still on his side'.
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Mar 26, 2019 01:50
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Don't gently caress up the cult.
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Mar 26, 2019 03:38
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Blasphemaster posted:Don't gently caress up the cult. Exactly this. A. This is what Asherah was made for. Let him go for his win, and if it looks like he's going to lose, he can ask us for help. Win-win for the Devilfish Herself, after all, either he wins and we have a powerful ally, or he learns that he is still no match for his mother.
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Mar 26, 2019 04:16
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What if we Port in wearing a bulky and extremely silly shark costume, along with several dark isle kids in shark costumes and do a musical number in between the two armies to that K-pop cover of that shark song? Then everyone is in awwwwww mode and the two Asherahs do a fusion dance and all is peaceful (also we lose no more troops for the rush to conquer the pagan lands which is everything else everywhere). "I'm a   "
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Mar 26, 2019 04:41
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Blasphemaster posted:Don't gently caress up the cult. Fair enough, changing my vote to this.
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Mar 26, 2019 08:22
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 The war in…. Some field somewhere. There was little Sarga could do now, this was Asherahs problem, and if he was to succeed as a god, he would have to do this on his own. Asherah must have sensed this, as he stepped from whatever veil he inhabited and onto the field of battle. Both Asherahs sized each other up, then bellowed as one. ”PRETENDER!!! This was taken to signal the start of the Battle of the Gods. The two sides surged forwards, and the hulking gods made straight for each other. They smashed their way through the front lines of troops, and met in the centre of the field. Imperial Asherah was larger, stronger, but he was slower than the True Asherah. They fought on, slashing at each other with long claws and slamming each other with vicous hammerheadbuts. Around them, their men died, some braver ones shot arrows at their opposing god, trying to aid him. Soon both Asherahs had bolts and arrows sticking from all over the skin, and blood running down. Imperial Asherah seems to be slowing, and although he had landed some good hits on Asherah, he had taken some hits himself. He slipped on the bloody ground, then, as Asherah moved in to the kill he slithered around, covering his golden hide in mud and blood, and locked his teeth on Asherahs knee. The cracking sound brought the battle to a momentary standstill. Imperial Asherah took a few steps back, grinning a bloody grin, then began to circle the kill. Back off holiday and having a keyboard to type on means we’re back in action. Things are going poorly, what do we do? A - Hold off, Asherah need to do this himself. B - Send magical aid covertly (healing, other invisible ways) C - Send magical aid overtly (fireballs, lightning. D - Send in an obsidionilla. E - Appear ourselves to save the day. F - Side with Imperial Asherah. Back the winning horse. G - Something else! quote:Mana = 400/400 (2/day at the castle)
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Apr 1, 2019 08:48
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B&C, Asherah can claim credit for both in the aftermath and then we privately have a conversation about being too big for his britches and not forgetting who saved his rear end yet again. While all of this poo poo is going on in the field I hope our cultists are having a field day back in town(s).
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Apr 1, 2019 13:26
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B. Covertly get him to no-sell that. Rot the pretender's teeth concurrent to repairing the damage to Asherah.
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Apr 1, 2019 14:13
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AJ_Impy posted:B. Covertly get him to no-sell that. Rot the pretender's teeth concurrent to repairing the damage to Asherah.
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Apr 1, 2019 14:14
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AJ_Impy posted:B. Covertly get him to no-sell that. Rot the pretender's teeth concurrent to repairing the damage to Asherah. Dis be smart. Me vote dis.
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Apr 1, 2019 14:40
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AJ_Impy posted:B. Covertly get him to no-sell that. Rot the pretender's teeth concurrent to repairing the damage to Asherah. 
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Apr 1, 2019 17:21
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A https://youtu.be/YFFo7xz69t0
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Apr 1, 2019 19:40
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Vote: B - Send magical aid covertly (healing, other invisible ways) And, remind Asherah afterwards that even Gods can die in this new Age.
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Apr 1, 2019 20:45
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B
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Apr 1, 2019 22:14
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F but inevitable betrayal
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Apr 1, 2019 22:19
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I'd be okay with B and C.
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Apr 1, 2019 22:49
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B&C. Magic is meant to be used.
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Apr 2, 2019 06:19
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Remember the teeth. Sarga decides to step in, she casts two spells, the first is a healing spell on Asherah that begins to bind his wound, the second one targets the teeth of the Imperial Asherah, attempting to cause them to rot out in his mouth. Asherahs wounds began to heal, but Sarga could not get her attack spell to take. The monster looked up into the sky and laughed. ”I can feel you mage, poking around up there. But know this I am all powerful, your magic will not work on aARGGHA!” the beasts speech was cut off as Asherah surged from the ground and locked his jaws on his opponents vulnerable throat. They clenched shut and Asherah pulled. A fountain of gore sprayed over him and the Imperial Asherah slumped to the ground clutching his ruined throat, his life blood running rivers into the earth. ”Monologuing. Such a rookie mistake.” Sarga said to herself. The battle turned in an instant, all who could see either broke or surged forward, and the Imperial army quickly turned into nothing more than a fleeing mob. The Truther army took the day and the field. After that, it was all over for the Empire. The people marched forward, and where they were opposed they destroyed their enemies. A portion of the Nobility - lead by those who had joined Sargas cult, submitted to keep their lands and some form of power, others were banished or killed. Victorious, the Asherans began to set up a new state. Sarga settled back, happy with her work, and now her eyes turned once more to the horizon. You got lucky there - the magic failed, but Asherah won the contest with hefty penalties! 1- So! What form of state will be formed from the ruins of the Empire of Zhog? A - A Kingdom ruled by Asherah B - A Kingsom ruled by the chosen of Asherah C - A Republic - power to the people D - A theocracy - power to the church E - Something else? 2 - What shall this new nation be called? 3 - What is the next step in our master plan? A - See the orks B - Find a dark tower and a powerful supervillain C - get the Princess married. D - Go knock over some other country E - Something else? quote:Mana = 400/400 (2/day at the castle)
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Apr 2, 2019 09:15
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C. We need to be able to focus elsewhere, as does Asherah. The angel's forces know his origin, they attacked him in the first place, and surely will again. Best not to have a sign on the front door where he's going to be ruling from. Sharklantis. A. Those cute little green buggers are a huge thorn in the side of humanity without any guidance or support, let's go give it to them. Let the proverbial bull loose in the proverbial china shop, except the bull has extra legs and horns and weighs several tons because of magic.
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Apr 2, 2019 13:11
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C. We don't need a religious apartheid state. The People's Republic of Sharklantis C Also the rush of belief there reminds me of Om hitting Vorbis in the forehead in Small Gods.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:47
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Nephzinho posted:C. We need to be able to focus elsewhere, as does Asherah. The angel's forces know his origin, they attacked him in the first place, and surely will again. Best not to have a sign on the front door where he's going to be ruling from. Rule from the shadows. Until we get bored. We're definitely back on Good's (sic) radar.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:47
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Beerdeer posted:
Glad Im not the only one who thought of that.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:09
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C Megalopolis A The princess will marry for love, and be our Patsy. Every time we are going to interview a prospect, they will wait in a tea room with the princess and engage in small talk. People will begin to think she is us with our glamour on and try to plot around a trick that isn't there. Eventually she'll become a secondary protagonist in her own right and immediately become a lesbian abolitionist because of course we'll vote that way. The whole world ends up run by a polygamist coven of slaver murdering princesses in a sewing circle.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:24
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Blasphemaster posted:The whole world ends up run by a polygamist coven of slaver murdering princesses in a sewing circle. This is the future liberals want. Sign me the gently caress up
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Apr 2, 2019 15:25
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Blasphemaster posted:C This is the best timeline.
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Apr 2, 2019 17:39
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Blasphemaster posted:C I endorse this bright future
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Apr 2, 2019 18:49
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