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Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006
Probation
Can't post for 16 days!


And then define what third base actually is. Because I think it's well past time that we, as a society, sat down and codified what it means to get to each base so that future generations won't have to go through the same confusion that we did. And, of course, we're going to use the definitions I used growing up.

First Base: Making out with tongue. If you aren't covered with slobber then you were only At Bat. And don't try to lie and say that she totally did some crazy thing with her tongue, because we'll know and then we'll all make fun of you.

Second Base: Touching boobs. If it's your first time then under the shirt and over the bra is acceptable but every time after it must be skin to skin contact to count.

Third Base: Handies. Simple and clear cut.

Home: Mouth stuff. Again, real simple.

Grand Slam: You did it, you lost your virginity and are officially a Cool Kid.

Going to the Dugout: Butt stuff.

Line Drive to the Short Stop: Dry humping, obviously.

It Looked Like a Homer But It Landed Just Short But Was Caught By A Fan Before The Outfielder Could Get It: I have no idea, my friend wont tell me what this one means <>


Now, as you can see, the above all pertains to dudes talking about getting it on with ladies. But what about the reverse? I, not being a lady, cannot say and so I need the help of goons, known sexhavers. Same with defining these terms for gay men and lesbians.

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Nooner
Mar 26, 2007

AN A+ POSTER (:

3rd base is getting a blowy

lol but seriously I
Feb 24, 2007

~*weird*~*lf*~*chicken*~*thing*~


Slippery Tilde

the whole concept of 3rd base is extremely problematic because the implication that PIV sex is *ten hundred thousand words*

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

Jumbotron: kneeling in front of your big screen tv so it fills your vision while watching ASMR Hands Free Hypnosis Mind Control Orgasm Induction videos.

Pawn 17
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





Grimey Drawer

Let's stop using outdated references to a dead sport. Newer generations will better understand if these can be translated to things in Fortnite.

myDad
Jan 20, 2010

ce n'est pas ma mère

College Slice

3rd base is a titty loving

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

Rain Delay: The moment of global euphoria when the whole of earth stops moving to watch the Piss Tape the nanosecond it is released.

Sand Dan
May 15, 2017

welcum 2 our
sick cyberpunk h e l l


myDad posted:

3rd base is a titty loving

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006
Probation
Can't post for 16 days!


myDad posted:

3rd base is a titty loving

A tit gently caress is just a handjob with boobs instead of fingers. So I concur, it does fall under the definition of Third Base.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

I thought it was time you had a new av so typed in random picture and this is what came up


Pawn 17 posted:

Let's stop using outdated references to a dead sport. Newer generations will better understand if these can be translated to things in Fortnite.

Yeah nobody knows or cares about baseball in 21st century. I motion to replace these horribly dated labels with Quake style announcements.

lol but seriously I
Feb 24, 2007

~*weird*~*lf*~*chicken*~*thing*~


Slippery Tilde

Who What Now posted:

A tit gently caress is just a handjob with boobs instead of fingers.

"just" you ingrate you absolute philistine

Jose
Jul 24, 2007



Smythe posted:

Jumbotron: kneeling in front of your big screen tv so it fills your vision while watching ASMR Hands Free Hypnosis Mind Control Orgasm Induction videos.

Lol

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

Who What Now posted:

A tit gently caress is just a handjob with boobs instead of fingers. So I concur, it does fall under the definition of Third Base.

dude not even close. they are miles apart. not even in the same freaking ballpark

Stryder
Oct 3, 2002


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HzXI_ApY4dY

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014



titty fucks are awkward as hell

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006



Colonel Cancer posted:

Yeah nobody knows or cares about baseball in 21st century. I motion to replace these horribly dated labels with Quake style announcements.

jayden my man you wont ever believe what lykeneze did to me last we night. we totally m-m-m-monsterkilled it!!

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

Line Drive: blasting a load with such force it blows out the back of the poor lassy you're drillin' so that her organs explode out the back of her body.

Infield Pop Fly: Rotating your legs over your head so that when you cum it blasts right into your sissy mouth you pathetic cum eating slut. YOU LOVE IT!

Home Field Advantage: When the divot in your mattress caused my your extreme corpulence slurps around you or your partner and holds them in place in greasy B.O. laden bondage so you can really amp up the slop serving

down n out
Sep 16, 2008



Nap Ghost

Infield fly: You bust a load in your pants while making out and they ask if you have a condom

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


FINALLY i know what this poo poo means

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006
Probation
Can't post for 16 days!


Smythe posted:

dude not even close. they are miles apart. not even in the same freaking ballpark

I'm speaking in terms of taxonomy, not of pleasure. Please try to remain objective and scientific, this is for posterity!

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


its good to know where baseball gets their terminology though I'm a big fan

Dollas
Sep 16, 2007

$$$$$$$$$


Clapping Larry

i'm a switch hitter


wait

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

*Suck My Balls*

Grimey Drawer

ball sucking omitted

voted 1

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

I thought it was time you had a new av so typed in random picture and this is what came up


Landed a sweet last hit on my bae's second tower iykwim

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


what does a RHP mean

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


or extra innings

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


stolen base?

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006
Probation
Can't post for 16 days!


Chinatown posted:

ball sucking omitted

voted 1

That falls under mouth stuff!

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

I thought it was time you had a new av so typed in random picture and this is what came up


Ganked the wife on bot lane last night. I played support from the closet

lol but seriously I
Feb 24, 2007

~*weird*~*lf*~*chicken*~*thing*~


Slippery Tilde

The saber system: bored divorcees of between 35 to 50 will find it highly flattering that you want to "x" them, especially if you're young looking when you shave

Unassisted triple play: it will always end with screaming, emotionally wounding recriminations

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014



Relief Pitcher - Bae gets tired so you gotta finish urself off.

Pawn 17
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





Grimey Drawer

Colonel Cancer posted:

Ganked the wife on bot lane last night. I played support from the closet

I creeped until late game.

I Brake For MILFs
Jan 9, 2007



I'm curious as to what a sacrifice fly or a bunt could possible mean. The idea of playing "small ball."

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

I thought it was time you had a new av so typed in random picture and this is what came up


Pawn 17 posted:

I creeped until late game.

Did you at least solo the (bad) dragon?

Dollas
Sep 16, 2007

$$$$$$$$$


Clapping Larry

sometimes i get pine tar on the bat ehheheehe

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


last game I attended was nationally televised

Dollas
Sep 16, 2007

$$$$$$$$$


Clapping Larry

i have an excellent slider

Pawn 17
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





Grimey Drawer

Colonel Cancer posted:

Did you at least solo the (bad) dragon?

Yes and I'm currently on a god-like streak if you know what I mean!

Dollas
Sep 16, 2007

$$$$$$$$$


Clapping Larry

i stole home and now i'm in jail for a very long time

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Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


lol you're probably in the minor leagues

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