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grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




Oh, you caught a buck? How many points was it?

Just one, but it hurt like a son of a bitch

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grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Dixville posted:

Lol I started realizing I was posting screenshots from my phone with a bunch of notifications up so I'm actually making a concerted effort to delete them more now so people won't judge me

Because of the earlier email chat on this thread I went and deleted all the emails that had been piling up. It took me a good 45 minutes.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




So do women with insanely intricate nail art just resign themselves to never using their hands again? Do they learn how to write with their feet like amputees?

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



MageMage posted:

Let's be real here. There are exceptions to the rule but, let's be real here.

Are you saying there aren't plenty of women who are anti abortion crazies? Then you should meet my cousin. She gave out the email addresses of a bunch of my relatives to her activist buddies and started bombarding them with pictures of aborted fetuses.

grittyreboot has a new favorite as of 02:39 on Jul 20, 2018

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




I have a crack in my screen now because this made me drop my phone

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



I'm the guy at parties who actually eats from the veggie tray, including the celery. Just pop some ranch on that bad boy and I'm gtg.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Somebody has a new favorite as of 11:03 on Aug 26, 2018

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



twistedmentat posted:

Anyways talking about mal adjusted nerds



The message isn't AUG, but its the attitude. They probably do have a problem with people coming in and going "hey can you turn on the game?" and maybe they're getting salty when the staff won't stop playing Ice Pirates. All they'd need to say is "hey there are a ton of other bars playing sports, please don't ask us to switch to the game' or even "this is a nerd bar for nerdy things, if you're looking for a sports bar, look elsewhere" but no, they have to make a stand, they have to shout geek pride and stick it to the dumb jocks who in their mind are coming in just to make fun of them for playing Catan while having a beer.

It makes me think of that dumb "In this house we respect the prime directive, the force, whatever dumb harry potter thing...." plaque I see every so often. You're not special because you like Star Wars and Lord of the Rings! They were some of the most popular things in recent history! You're not unique and special!

I sometimes go to a nerdy bar. The trick is that it's a bar first and nerd playground second. If you wanna watch 80's pro wrestling or play Smash Bros, it's there for you. Otherwise it still has bands and pool tables if that's your thing. It pulls in a really diverse croud because the vibe is never judgy or adversarial. I think that's how you should run a nerd bar, not this cringy NERDS UNITE attitude.

Anyways here's an AUG Kitchen Nightmares episode wherin Gordon meets 2 impish manchild twins who look, sound, and act like Patton Oswalt characters. https://youtu.be/XSO1JHezZqA

grittyreboot has a new favorite as of 07:40 on Sep 1, 2018

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



text me a vag pic posted:

https://metalartisan.deviantart.com/









bitch looks like max landis litle brother, min landis

He looks like Zach Braff went through a late in life goth phase.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Guy makes a compilation of himself farting at work, gets fired.
https://youtu.be/ECnmDUPS0vY

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



WebDog posted:

I had to keep editing around cans of Jim Beam that kept on appearing in his hands from his mates as soon as they woke up.
Even the service was a "hold me drink bro".

I've never heard of canned Jim Beam before. I live in Kentucky, I drink a lot of bourbon, but no way am I drinking an entire cans worth in just a few hours.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



People have to guess each others kinks
https://youtu.be/tpgszSFG99w

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




Never seen a person made up of nothing but right angles before.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



There's no boring game concept thread, but they gave the pig toys teats so I'm posting it here
https://youtu.be/dIjgPbb1fw4

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Me and this girl went to a hookah bar to see what it was all about. We left 5 minutes after getting a table because this 18 year old was trying to impress girls by breakdancing. And by breakdancing I mean spinning on his head over and over again.

The kid was starting to get seriously dizzy, but he kept spinning. Think of a spinning top that's starting to wobble and that's this kid.

Soon enough he wobbles his way over to our table. I shout at him to look where he's going: he doesn't listen. I shout at the employee to kick this kid out: he doesn't listen either.

By his last spin he's close enough that we're feeling the wind off his foot. So we both leave without paying. She's in a full blown panic attack yelling at me to man up and I'm yelling that I don't wanna get kicked in the face by a breakdancer.

She didn't call after that.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Yeet posted:

Aug date chat, I'm 32 and have never gone to "bone town," which doesn't really bother me but that gives you an idea of my experience level. Ask me about being incel

I think I posted the story about my first kiss like 8 years ago but oh well. I was 21 and had never been out on a date let alone kiss someone. My brother found his now-wife on craigslist so I was eh, gently caress it. Posted something like "never kissed someone" and surprisingly got responses. A quite cute girl ended up coming over and I ended up mashing her face 1940s style kissing. She laughed at me and said it was "cute" but then my cat Buddy "pissed" on the "rug" which was an awkward break. But she was cool! She asked if we could cuddle in my bed and things are getting pretty wild. I'm thinking awesome, I could just become a sex god in one night. We're both half naked and that rear end hole cat comes in and lies down on her legs. I'm whisper yelling "Buddy! Get off!" and my date says "no don't! I can feel him purring!"

And then we ended up lying there talking with the cat on her until she left. The creepy cat part is I had my door shut so he must've slipped in and just watched us for like 20 minutes.

Also I can't remember the conversation but when I meant "self deprecating" I said self defecating

E: Happy birthday my friend!

You ever heard of the cat that lives in the nursing home that knows when the residents are about to die? Yours is worse.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Peanut Butter posted:

The 'A' in AUG doesn't stand for awesome, buddy.

Also, I was taking a piss in the local shopping centre and saw this. Naturally, I thought of you guys.



What kind of monster would do this to the poor cleaners?

That's just malicious. Every single toilet seat at my job has piss on them. Not like a little droplet here and there, every inch of seat is evenly covered by piss. Like if they attached a garden hose nozzle set to mist to their dick.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



It's really impressive that TikTok manages to attract such a diverse range of douchebags

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




Something doesn't add up. How could he learn the fiddle if he spent all day at the forum whining about women gladiators?

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



TinTower posted:

I regret to inform you all that the Catholics have discovered Izzy Australia.

https://twitter.com/adequateemily/s...58669848576?s=2
“You didn’t think ‘Fancy’ could get any more white, did you?”

I'm confused why Emily doesn't think this guy is religious considering he sets off all the alarms of someone who has no friends or life outside of his church.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



soy posted:

this was awful to watch

Well most H3H3 videos are.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Bees on Wheat posted:

Ugh, the worst is when you have headphones on and you're reading something and people still try to talk to you.

I bring books into work and people constantly ask me what I'm reading. I wouldn't mind except I mostly read pulpy sci fi/ fantasy and I'm too embarrassed to explain the premise.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Found her blog. She must be spending thousands of dollars a month on professional photography. The best way I can describe her style is 'beige hell'.

http://mommyslittlesunshine.blogspot.com/?m=1

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




When I got evicted I left an open jug of old milk in the fridge for them to find.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Big Centipede posted:

A friend of mine got evicted from his apartment so he dumped 2 dozen dead rats into the a/c vents



Scathach posted:

We ended up getting out of a hosed-up living situation and left a housebus behind on a farm (it ran on CNG which isn't publicly available here anymore) and left the composting toilet with it. Whoever finds that thing is going to have a bitch of a time figuring that out.

Holy poo poo. And here I was thinking I was being vindictive.

Edit: gently caress landlords

grittyreboot has a new favorite as of 08:34 on Apr 1, 2019

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



jobson groeth posted:

Just lol if you think the sort of person who pulls a scam like Theranos will wait to start again. As soon as she thinks no one is watching she'll start another one.

Kinda like the Fyre Fest guy. He started a fake ticket scam while he was awaiting prosecution for the festival.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Let's be honest, that guy didn't really need two post its

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Sandwich Anarchist posted:

I worked at Best Buy and watched a kid jiggle a poo poo out of the bottom of his pant leg, pick it up, and hand it to an employee before she realized what it was, and just hosed off into the video game area.

I think you've told this story 3 or 4 times now and it never fails to bring a smile to my face.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




There's like 5 of these at every bar I go to.

grittyreboot has a new favorite as of 23:44 on May 7, 2019

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Professor of Cats posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mwcSSK-1RQ#t=45s

When you graduate from black and white photos of brick walls to pretend comic, slam poetry?


(e: sorry for the trash snipe)
(e2: maybe this is more just a film student with schizophrenia)

My friend thinks he could do a stand-up based on his Tweets. This is what his act would be minus the random racial slurs.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012




You can't tell me those kids aren't evil ghosts.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Violet_Sky posted:



Weddings are a goldmine of AUG.

I was once tasked by the groom to make sure our mutual friend rented a suit instead of his usual outfit. He was that guy who always wore a pullover hoodie and basketball shorts regardless of weather or social situation. I once saw a picture of him wearing that outfit to a funeral.

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



I suppose one way to stop manspreading is to just ruin the concept of chairs. Honestly I'm hypnotized by how bad the design is. It's like the furniture version of live action Sonic. The back is too small to support anything but still big enough to force you to sit straight up. The seat is so flat that it's gonna make your rear end numb.

Why can't those walls on the men's chair at least be parallel? Why does the women's version force them to manspread? Am I going crazy?

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Woman gives herself chemical burns for.... Something? https://twitter.com/FamousCeleb/sta...2092110848?s=19

grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



Kentucky politics is always AUG
https://twitter.com/WuTangCannabis/...1414069249?s=19

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grittyreboot
Oct 2, 2012



We have a Discord set up: https://discord.gg/bkvRYGr

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