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chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014




This guy looks way too much like a former AP Psychology classmate of mine from high school. He was the teacher's son, so obviously he did the best in that class.

He later got arrested and suspended from UCF for attempting to surprise sex a drunk girl at a party. The only reason it was "attempted" is he was such a virgin he didn't know how much harder it is to get into a girl who's bone dry and gave up.

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chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



ParserGirl posted:

Does anyone have the four panel image with a woman responding to this image?




chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014




Occasionally I had thoughts of going to a convention in MRA cosplay. Flame shirt, cargo shorts, a fedora, a Mountain Dew bottle and bag of Doritos, and socks with sandals.

Then I realized that nobody would be able to tell I wasn't serious.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014




The 84% Match is the most unbelievable part.

cash crab posted:

Also, I think we can mine better material than dudes in fedoras now, because it's not 2006. God bless.

Silly bros in fedoras will always be AUG.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



cash crab posted:

has anyone ever told you what a loving exceptional username you have

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Picnic Princess posted:

That's now 2 friend's exes I've seen mocked on this site. Motherfucker.

Sometimes I forget you and cash crab aren't sisters or something.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



JEEVES420 posted:

There were threats and one person that opened fire at a military recruitment center some years back. Some idiots like that guy thought they would go protect the offices for the military by standing outside with their guns.

The funniest part of that photo is that AR has an arm brace, not a stock, and <16" barrel making it more than likely a pistol not SBR (requires a tax stamp to be a short barreled rifle) but still has a vertical front grip on it which is prohibited on a pistol without a tax stamp making it a registered AOW. He is most likely committing a felony in that picture by possessing an unregistered AOW.

He also has no sights on the gun but I guess he doesn't need them with his eyes closed.

https://www.atf.gov/firearms/docs/o...andgun/download

Also if he used the arm brace as a stock and didn't have it registered as an SBR, it would legally become a short-barreled rifle and thus also a felony. Basically unless he had it registered as an SBR, he's almost definitely committing a felony with a gun that couldn't hit anything past 50 feet.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Fleta Mcgurn posted:

SOMEONE'S not having a great time in middle school...

That's much, much, much cleaner than my middle school restrooms.

I used them once in all three years. I nearly threw up.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Fleta Mcgurn posted:

That makes me feel really sad. I hope your old school has improved considerably.

Knowing middle schoolers, I'm going to say no.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014




*my own distant screaming*

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



im pooping! posted:

it's actually a decent youtube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/Mangoworms

WHY IS THERE A YOUTUBE CHANNEL

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014







chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



*dramatically turns and whips cape* Mission....accomplished.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



AUG Thread: You can post fewer than 5 rubber pussies

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014





He called it a meat scepter twice.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



I’ve never had a serious injury story from sex, but a few times during doggy style my ex’s head bounced off the wall. It’s okay though because she’s a masochist.

I also had one case during attempted car sex where the girl was trying to position herself on top and her rear end hit the steering wheel, setting off the car alarm. Because we were doing this in a deserted parking lot for a public park, we freaked out and drove away before any cop came to investigate...before she had put her clothes back on.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



*loud screeching*

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



This came on my Spotify mix. The cover art is...interesting.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



John Ringo used them as the protagonist’s favorite band in the Ghost series of extremely racist right-wing novels, including having him sing the lyrics during action scenes, so they’re permanently associated with that in my mind.

Also their music videos feel like a Vampire: The Masquerade LARP on film:

https://youtu.be/SVNjx4k8mWk

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



I can’t remember if the singer is/was married to either the violinist or one of the spastic dancers on stage.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



It’s like I’d want to listen to them, but....



You can smell the MDMA crumbled in the vodka.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Lazlo Nibble posted:

How in god’s name are The Crüxshadows still around after 25 years?

The hairspray is a preservative.

Non-comedy answer, I think the goth community just hasn’t really evolved enough in 25 years that Crüxshadows is out of date.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Tiny Lowtax posted:

I just listened to a song by them and what could this many members possibly do in this band?

Also it was horrible and I didn’t last more than 90 seconds before I turned it off. And that was the most popular song by them on amazon music.

At least two of them seem to just be dancers?

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



ToxicSlurpee posted:

They basically always have a string section. Not in the "one or two guitars and a bass player" way but in the "multiple violins" kinds of ways. I think when they perform a couple of them just dance. There are actually a lot of things a "band" has to do; even a band with three or four performing members probably has support crew if they're big at all.

I actually like the Crüxshadows and still mostly listen to various flavors of industrial, spooky electronic, and gothic music. I think Winterborn is a very good song.

...it's me, I'm the AUG.

For the person that asked how they lasted 25 years, well...people enjoy them?

Hey let’s all remember John Ringo:

quote:

"Tide's making, so if we do go aground, we'll be able to float off. But I'll need to find a deep hole to set this thing or we'll be screwed when the tide goes out." He flipped a switch and the speakers started to boom with heavy bass.

"More Goth?" Courtney asked, sighing.

"I'm going to take you to a Goth concert, someday," Mike said, grinning. "You'll have a blast. And I need to get my head into mission mode. And in this debt, a better world is made . . ." he whispered. "In the fury of this darkest hour, we will be your light. You ask me for this sacrifice and I am Winter born . . . I hear the angels call my name . . ."

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Wait I found a better quote. Thanks Cyrano!

quote:

Amy. "There any bandages in the room?"

"No," Amy said. "Why? Oh, crap!"

"Yeah," Mike said, sitting up and leaning back. When his back touched the wall he felt like screaming, but he was afraid he'd pass out if he stayed prone. "Fight until you die or drop time."

"Where have I heard that before?" Amy asked.

"Axes flash, broadswords swing," Mike quietly sung. "Shining armor's piercing ring. Horses run on a polished shield. Fight those bastards til they yield."

"Midnight mare and blood red roan," Amy replied. "Fight to keep this land your own."

"Sound the horn and call the cry," they sang together. "HOW MANY OF THEM CAN WE MAKE DIE!"

"What is that?" Babe asked from the doorway.

"'March of Cambreadth,'" Amy replied. "Heather Alexander. Very cool song. That's the only verse I can ever remember. My dad used to play it."

"I think I'd like your dad," Mike said and coughed. His hand came away dark in the flare light, but he was pretty sure it was blood. It wasn't a sucking chest wound but something had nicked his lung. "Follow orders as you're told, make their yellow blood run cold. Fight until you die and drop. A force like ours is hard to stop. Close your mind to stress and pain, fight 'til you're no longer sane. Let not one damned cur pass by. How many of them can we make die."

"You know the whole song?" Amy asked.

"And lots of others," Mike said, weakly. "Right now I'm thinking of one by Crüxshadows."

"Who?" Amy asked.

"Great band," Mike whispered. "I will not run, this is my sacrifice," he sang, softly then coughed. "For I am Winter born . . ."

"Bad song, Ghost," Amy said. "I really need you to hang in here."

"I will, Amy," Mike said. "I will. I hereby dub thee . . . Bo."

"Why Bo for God's Sake?" Amy asked, angrily. "It's better than Thumper, I suppose . . ."

"For Boadicea," Mike replied. "The Celtic warrior queen."

"Oh. In that case . . ."

"Of course, she lost," Mike added honestly. "And was dragged off to Rome in chains. But hopefully we'll do better."

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Ibblebibble posted:

You're right, grey underwear is pretty gross.

That just let me notice the Pokemon belt.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014





chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Zipperelli. posted:

Hasn't this been ruled a criminal act?

I believe stealing parts off someone's body without their consent can be ruled as assault. In the UK, the 2006 Human Tissue Act also makes the act of taking and storing human tissue without consent or performing DNA tests without consent a crime.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014




555 unread messages is incredibly gross.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Skippy McPants posted:

In addition to the obvious, I also hate that his shirt alternates between caps and underlining for emphasis. Pick one and stick with it, you vacillating fuckwit!

It almost looks like the underlining is tiny text, like a URL.

There's also a female counterpart shirt:

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Knormal posted:



Sidenote on the source to that image: Yikes
http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Charac...y_parts_removed

Someone out there is masturbating to this page.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Dienes posted:

Does trashy count as gross and awkward?



Especially if they have their kid with them.

chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



I was just looking up stuff on the band...



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chitoryu12
Apr 23, 2014



Helping make a thread title for the AUG thread is always an emotional cross between pleasure and pain.

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