PYF AUG: you don't get to see her chew the MLP figurine.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > PYF AUG: you don't get to see her chew the MLP figurine.

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cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

I know y'all were particularly heart-broken the last time I shut down the AUG thread, but in my defense, you're all completely terrible. Anyway, your friend [REDACTED]* is now unemployed and sitting in a friend's apartment in sunny [REDACTED] with nothing better to do than babysit your asses while you post in this thread.

*: I figure if you guys are going to send me threatening/insulting PMs, we may as well be on a first-name basis.

Once again, if you don't read the OP, that's a "you" problem.

Here's the rules:

1) No transphobia/homophobia/racism/etc. This always becomes a point of contention because some people can't understand why we can make fun of some people, and not other people. Essentially, if you think you're being funny by making fun of someone who is trans, that sort of makes you an rear end in a top hat. If you're making fun of someone for eating an entire block of cheese at a train station, that is funny. One person is subject to institutional and social vulnerability; the other person is eating cheese in public. If you can't tell the difference between those things, then I'm sorry. I'm going to be incredibly loving strict about this, including colourful language. If I cannot tell if you're joking or not, I will assume you're not.

ADDENDUM: This rule also encompasses a prior rule, which is that people who are a little fat or weird-looking but who can be otherwise categorized as unremarkable do not belong in this thread. A good rule of thumb is that if you saw this person at the grocery store, would you immediately drop all your groceries and call a priest or a rabbi? That person belongs here. If instead your reaction would be, "Ha-ha, nasty," but continued picking out a pasta sauce, probably not. Do not be goony about this rule, please.

2) No arguing about what is/isn't AUG. This does not include "this owns, actually", but it does include page-long slapfights.

3) :siren:

Here's a new one: :siren:

You are not allowed to submit more than five images in a row in a single post. You are also not permitted to submit, for example, five images in one post and immediately make another post with another couple of images. This rule exists for a reason and there are no exceptions.

4) ~~DO. NOT. SUBMIT. REPORTS. ABOUT. THIS. THREAD.~~ As of July, 2018, the summer of our Lord, the AUG thread now accepts reports. If your report is loving stupid, I will probate the reporter instead.

5) Another new rule! If you message me directly to call me a bitch, or whatever, I will screencap your message and post it here.

6) Oh, this is sort of a formatting thing more than anything, but be sure to timg large images and make sure you don't hide NSW images under spoilers, because that's just sort of ugly, but not in the way we're looking for.

7) Bats are bugs.

Anyway, here's a teratoma:

Ha-ha! Crunchy.

Here's a woman making out with a dog:

"Art"

Not sure what this is, but I don't like it:

Here's, uh... something:

Ha, "mood" amirite

Alright, have fun.

Tim Whatley posted:

I can't believe they replaced hot mustard on the menu with clown cum. Wouldn't have been my first choice but it's not my company

8) Jackalopes are real. Dispute their existence and be probated, you loving clown. You absolute moron buffoon idiot manbaby shitlord. loving moron.

cash crab has a new favorite as of 04:30 on Aug 11, 2019

# ¿ Apr 22, 2018 04:00

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# ¿ Apr 24, 2024 23:05

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Hello! So far, everything has been absolutely disgusting.

Thank you!

# ¿ Apr 22, 2018 07:55

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Sponge Baathist posted:

Like, I love this especially. This is such an underappreciated flavour of AUG. Thank you.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2018 07:56

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Probably stdh.jpg but:

# ¿ Apr 27, 2018 20:24

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

# ¿ Apr 29, 2018 05:47

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Scathach posted:

I love this for some reason.

Also, I finally got my first PM calling me a bitch. I just want to say I also added the qualifier "or whatever" because I wanted some creativity. What a disappointment.

# ¿ Apr 29, 2018 23:26

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

# ¿ Apr 30, 2018 06:42

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Also, every so often something belongs here instead of IoSM or the Tinder thread for a good reason:

Who names their child ORIVIA

# ¿ Apr 30, 2018 07:48

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Sorry for the triple post but hot drat

# ¿ Apr 30, 2018 09:50

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

chitoryu12 posted:

LMAO

Who What Now posted:

Well?

Solice Kirsk posted:

*cracks knuckles

It took me a minute to figure out what this was, and wow!

# ¿ May 2, 2018 03:11

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Solice Kirsk posted:

*the sounds of ripping velcro fills the air

That makes it worse

Palate cleanser

# ¿ May 2, 2018 08:01

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Randaconda posted:

Not sure I get this one.

# ¿ May 2, 2018 18:19

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Randaconda posted:

he's a tool. that's it.

Yeah, I sort of got that's why you might have posted it. The reason I'm asking is because aside from this just being screengrabs from a tankie discord chat, it's a lot of otherwise innocuous statements about people being on HRT. Since I don't normally see you focusing your ire on people who make jokes about Mensheviks it seemed odd to me, but I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt.

# ¿ May 2, 2018 19:01

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Moderator side-note: If I cannot tell what precisely is supposed to be funny about a post, you will need to explain it to me. "He's a tool" is not a sufficient explanation. Also, I think we can mine better material than dudes in fedoras now, because it's not 2006. God bless.

# ¿ May 2, 2018 20:12

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

trickybiscuits posted:

Am I a pervert for thinking this is kind of adorable?

You're desensitized, congrats. I think it's cute. The dog is alright, too.

# ¿ May 3, 2018 05:20

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Tonsil stones are your body making its own gemstones

# ¿ May 3, 2018 08:26

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Edit: timg. I had no idea the pic was this big when I phone posted, sorry.

It didn't break the tables on desktop, so it's all good, but I appreciate it.

T-man posted:

Raccoon Mod Emily please change the tag on this thread, it shows up the same as the cute thread in my bookmarks and I reeeally don't want to get the two confused one day. TIA.

I will take this into consideration.

# ¿ May 3, 2018 20:10

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Picnic Princess posted:

I'm sorry everyone.

I found it.

I have to post it.

Because this thread has returned.

And it belongs here.

The Thing Of Which We Do Not Speak

Hall�! I changed the image to a link because I don't want any images under spoilers. It's not a decorum no-no, it's just a formatting peeve of mine.

# ¿ May 4, 2018 06:53

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

# ¿ May 4, 2018 08:39

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Sponge Baathist posted:

M.O.D.O.K. IRL

I'm really trying to lean into this image, but there's something so uncomfortable about it. The hardhat looks comically tiny. His expression radiates such sadness. What the gently caress is in his pocket. Etc.

# ¿ May 4, 2018 10:51

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

trickybiscuits posted:

Counterpoint: cat feet.

hosed-up teeth!

After:

This can't be the same after. How did the top set get a gap?

# ¿ May 6, 2018 10:28

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Sponge Baathist posted:

http://www.oxygen.com/crime-time/photos-golden-state-killer-suspects-penis-james-deangelo-taken

Even though the Wu Tang album didn't get seized and therefore they can't freedom of information act it we can laugh at the size of the Golden State Killer's reportedly small penis one day

http://www.oxygen.com/crime-time/Thomas-Tramaglini-school-superintendent-poop-football-field-district

This site is so far a good trove of AUG crime stories

# ¿ May 6, 2018 20:43

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Sorry to toothchat again, but I found what I believe to be the worst one.

I won't subject you to the full image right off the bat (that's :nms:

by the way).

# ¿ May 7, 2018 05:10

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

im pooping! posted:

we are as one

has anyone ever told you what a loving exceptional username you have

# ¿ May 7, 2018 09:59

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

# ¿ May 7, 2018 21:42

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

I want one of those to write tone deaf complaint letters to the Keg and different Apple stores I've never been to

# ¿ May 8, 2018 05:10

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

That reminds me, this lad popped up on my OKC the other day

# ¿ May 8, 2018 06:21

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Picnic Princess posted:

Oh gently caress that's my friend's ex

Yeah, wasn't the other one that Zach guy who found a bunch of cat hair under his foreskin and posted about it on Facebook?

Screaming Idiot posted:

Not a Nazi, seems to groom himself, has an awesome cat I want to pet, this dude only seems kinda douchey compared to the never-ending horrorshow that is the internet.

Seriously, I would hang with this dude and argue about religion over taquitos and Coke while our cats play and The Adventure Zone blasts in the background.

I know, right? He's probably a pretty chill dude, but he's sort of a dweeb. What to do?

T-man posted:

Stop dating men, problem solved.

Develop a higher predilection for the feline persuasion, then. Gotcha.

# ¿ May 8, 2018 06:50

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL posted:

Hording seems to be a symptom of depression or some other mental disorder or trauma. Deliberate laziness though I�ve come to associate with toxic masculinity and other failures to parent and/or learned helplessness lest we forget the Reddit posts about young adult men who don�t wipe properly or wash their assholes. Apologies I don�t have a picture but a twitter post went viral in the last day where a young guy purposely left his kitchen messy and brought his girlfriend over for the first time. After she left he publically lamented she wasn�t wife material because she didn�t touch a single piece of the filth. She found the post and dumped him, good on her.

I've lived with a few hoarders over the years, almost all of them women. Usually, it seemed to be a weird control thing. My last roommate was an ardent environmentalist, which is how she justified saving a 3'x5' box filled with old Purolator envelopes, or why our fridge was filled with rotting food all the time. You could see her panicking every time me and the other girl would get tired of it and throw something out. I used to have pictures of some of the inventories of stuff she'd amassed but I guess I deleted them.

Anyways, here's some classic low-hanging fruit:

Look, ma! No teeth!

# ¿ May 10, 2018 19:33

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL posted:

But that�s not what we�re discussing. That said, I believe the same Reddit post included an empathetic response from a young man who lived with an adult sister who did not work nor had good hygiene to the point of stinking of old blood. However I maintain there are some differing mechanisms from the �nurture� side of things when it comes to expectations of cisgender men and women when it comes to cleanliness (of self and the home).

And now I realize this is toeing too close to debating what is/n�t AUG so I�ll leave off on this line of discussion.

Small story: at one point I lived with roommates in a poorly-built house (newer, but built on the cheap right before the artificially inflated housing bubble burst) where we discovered during deep cleaning upon preparing for moveout that the master bedroom tub had a crack where the tub met the tile that mushrooms grew from. A couple lived in that room and there was nothing obvious by way of odor, but they were first to leave and only afterward did we realize they were poor cleaners to put it kindly. Imagine showering and having these very thin mushrooms sprouting inches from where you stood, an inch high. I wish I�d taken pics because I�ve never found anything like them before or since.

Picnic Princess posted:

I was reminded of a story for you guys today.

Way back I had a roommate who I had been friends with in high school. His hygiene was horrendous. He had his own bar of soap that he kept in the shower soap dish, my husband and I kept ours in a corner of the tub. This guy's soap developed drainage basins from erosion and no use. It looked like an aerial photo of an eroded slope. We eventually called him out which was so awkward but he started showering more frequently.

A few months later we were all up drinking together and my husband went to pee. Our friend asked if he could have a hug because he just thought I was cool and he liked hugging people. I said sure. This was a mistake. He wouldn't let me go and started saying I should leave my husband for him and that we'd be perfect together. After I steadfastly refused things got extremely awkward between us all and we weren't friends or roommates for much longer after that.

# ¿ May 11, 2018 09:01

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

PS: Whizz!

# ¿ May 11, 2018 09:39

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

# ¿ May 13, 2018 09:07

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

BiggerBoat posted:

Does anyone remember the old dollfucker threads?

Kevin Havens is still buying dolls and appears to be living in a tent. He's also turned into a hunchback and gotten really skinny.

NSFWhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJ-68oYwZ2INSFW

Solice Kirsk posted:

I only see one pair of removed boots....did the other person go into the bathroom with no shoes to begin with? Plus none of the socks are long enough for boots. No, no, no, none of this is adding up at all.

Maybe they live in that bathroom and some rude person stole their shoes, so now their close friends are in their favourite stall with them, consoling them.

# ¿ May 15, 2018 19:46

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Simone Poodoin posted:

e: wrong thread

usually, yeah

# ¿ May 16, 2018 05:44

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

twistedmentat posted:

I found this

Mild NSFW
https://imgur.com/gallery/JZKci

And a thread on reddit which confirms its from Russia. I am pretty sure I read that it was a school for Rich Kids on SA years ago.

Seeing these girls in any other context than the "birth of a supervillain" picture is deeply unsettling.

# ¿ May 17, 2018 04:40

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

i take a hammer and switch the gear

# ¿ May 19, 2018 10:36

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Picnic Princess posted:

So they rubbed the ash in it. Right?

Maybe? I can't tell if all that purple is some kind of stencil left over, which would be hilarious.

# ¿ May 19, 2018 21:10

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Submitted to reddit with the caption: "my roommate's bathroom"

# ¿ May 23, 2018 08:04

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

twistedmentat posted:

Humans can live anywhere.

"Live"

DicktheCat posted:

Btw, how do you guys come across aug content? I've never run across this awful poo poo in my browsing otber than these threads.

Reddit, Tumblr, and the vague echos of horrors since past.

# ¿ May 24, 2018 05:36

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# ¿ Apr 24, 2024 23:05

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

twistedmentat posted:

Out of the countless times I have seen this image, I have never noticed the other, smaller dirty room on the screen.

CelticPredator posted:

For me, this video found it’s way into mine and my friends YouTube recommendations some how and i looked into his channel more, and found that Rey video.

for naked dolls
https://youtu.be/07YmJEreZNM

The whole video is nasty but the quote about the creepy realism is just so odd to me. This man is gross and weird and has odd hang ups, both sexually and with hot toys figures.

I think the thing that is most striking about this so far is that when he is tasked (ostensibly) with saying "vagina" his voice drops perceptibly and he automatically substitutes it with "va-jay-jay". I would expect no less from a man like this.

# ¿ May 24, 2018 07:57

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > PYF AUG: you don't get to see her chew the MLP figurine.

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