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Look Around You
Jan 19, 2009

You're just lucky my jaw is broken!


HELLO HELLO HELLO! IT'S TIME FOR THE 2018 T-T-T-TRIPLE CROWN!!! I DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT HORSE BUT I KNOW THAT THEY RUN THREE RACES AND IT'S HARD TO WIN ALL THREE!!! ALSO A BUNCH OF RICH PEOPLE ACT ALL BOURGEOIS AT THE RACES SO THAT'S FUN TOO!

RACE 1: The KENTUCKY DERBY at CHURCHILL DOWNS in LOUISVILLE, KY on SATURDAY, MAY 5TH at 2:30PM ET on NBC

RACE 2: The PREAKNESS STAKES at PIMLICO RACE COURSE in BALTIMORE, MD on SATURDAY, MAY 19TH

RACE 3: The BELMONT STAKES at BELMONT PARK in ELMONT, NY on SATURDAY, JUNE 9TH

SOME IDIOTS PEOPLE BET ON THESE RACES TOO I GUESS! HERE ARE THE ODDS FOR THE 2018 KENTUCKY HORSE RACE!

quote:

Justify (7-2)
Mendelssohn (5-1)
My Boy Jack (5-1)
Audible (6-1)
Good Magic (8-1)
Bolt d'Oro (8-1)
Magnum Moon (13-1)
Vino Rosso (18-1)
Hofburg (24-1)
Lone Sailor (29-1)
Promises Fulfilled (41-1)
Free Drop Billy (42-1)
Noble Indy (49-1)
Enticed (52-1)
Flameaway (53-1)
Firenze Fire (65-1)
Solomini (68-1)
Bravazo (68-1)
Combatant (79-1)
Instilled Regard (99-1)

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CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

Again, Torts took him to a very high mountain and showed him Nationwide and all its splendor.

"All this I will give you," he said, "if you will lay down and block for me." -Jackets 15:16



Go Horse.

Does anybody have Eddie Olczyk's hot betting takes?

Eltoasto
Aug 26, 2002

We come spinning out of nothingness, scattering stars like dust.


Grimey Drawer

Weir is still the best.

geeves
Sep 16, 2004



Can Weir and Lipinski replace Pierre McGuire in the booth for the Pens / Caps game tonight?

CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

Again, Torts took him to a very high mountain and showed him Nationwide and all its splendor.

"All this I will give you," he said, "if you will lay down and block for me." -Jackets 15:16



geeves posted:

Can Weir and Lipinski replace Pierre McGuire in the booth for the Pens / Caps game tonight?

They did do stuff with ice skates. I'll allow it.

VikingSkull
Jan 23, 2017


turn left clydesdale nooooooooooooooooo

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN

That track is a loving slop, I hope nobody snaps a leg today

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



CBJSprague24 posted:

Go Horse.

Does anybody have Eddie Olczyk's hot betting takes?
He dropped it on Good Magic...

Also, welcome to the only day of the year America gives a rip about horsey.

Robnoxious fucked around with this message at May 5, 2018 around 22:41

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011



Hair Elf

Likes mud, likes mud / This X means the horse likes mud

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



Edward Mass posted:

Likes mud, likes mud / This X means the horse likes mud
Loves the slop, born to slop...

His mother was a mudder.

edit: Well even though it's past post time, I'll drop 10 funbuxs on Bolt d'Oro @ 8-1

Robnoxious fucked around with this message at May 5, 2018 around 22:45

Armitage
Aug 16, 2005

"Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."


still disappointed orb never won the triple crown, but I am glad to see that at least one horse did in my lifetime!

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011



Hair Elf

That's a lot of horse-watchers in person.

my bat mitzvah ROCKED
Mar 13, 2002

MY AV IS VERY COOL OP, NOT GETTING ANOTHER

I say they put possums or koala bears on the back of the horses instead of the little midget with the whooping stick

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



LOAD 'EM UP!

Look Around You
Jan 19, 2009

You're just lucky my jaw is broken!


i thought i missed horsey earlier but apparently it is almost now so i am happy

Acquilae
May 15, 2013



go horsies!

justifyyyyyy

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN

I'm shocked, absolutely shocked, that a Bob Baffert horse won again

Look Around You
Jan 19, 2009

You're just lucky my jaw is broken!


yay horse

Youth Decay
Aug 17, 2015

a little too tithonic
yeah I really do think


Mike Smith is a legend.

VikingSkull
Jan 23, 2017


Your 2018 Kentucky Derby winner is the tiniest dad in the world

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



Holy poo poo, his silks look like they just came out of the laundry.

my bat mitzvah ROCKED
Mar 13, 2002

MY AV IS VERY COOL OP, NOT GETTING ANOTHER

Does the horse feel a sense of accomplishment or is it still just a fast cow

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?


my bat mitzvah ROCKED posted:

Does the horse feel a sense of accomplishment or is it still just a fast cow

He's probs stoked that he gets to eat some oats and doesn't have a dwarf hitting him with a stick anymore

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



my bat mitzvah ROCKED posted:

Does the horse feel a sense of accomplishment or is it still just a fast cow
Horse gets extra oats!
Horsies love oats, soo.... maybe?

InsensitiveSeaBass
Apr 1, 2008

You're entering a realm which is unusual. Maybe it's magic, or contains some kind of monster... The second one. Prepare to enter The Scary Door.

Nap Ghost

Robnoxious posted:

Horse gets extra oats!
Horsies love oats, soo.... maybe?

Don't forget all the sex he now gets to have!

Robnoxious
Feb 17, 2004



InsensitiveSeaBass posted:

Don't forget all the sex he now gets to have!

Still two more horsie to go before the stud fee skyrockets to free ballin'.
But yeah, horse can bang solid 7's even if it tanks The Preakness.

my bat mitzvah ROCKED
Mar 13, 2002

MY AV IS VERY COOL OP, NOT GETTING ANOTHER

God blessed the rich horse family

That was nice

Khazar-khum
Oct 22, 2008

Cat Army
2nd Battalion


my bat mitzvah ROCKED posted:

Does the horse feel a sense of accomplishment or is it still just a fast cow

They know.

Look Around You
Jan 19, 2009

You're just lucky my jaw is broken!


Bumping this because HORSE IS TODAY!!!

runoverbobby
Apr 21, 2007

Fighting like beavers.


Mud again. Horse must navigate the mud.

CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

Again, Torts took him to a very high mountain and showed him Nationwide and all its splendor.

"All this I will give you," he said, "if you will lay down and block for me." -Jackets 15:16



MORE HORSE!

More dirty horse.

runoverbobby
Apr 21, 2007

Fighting like beavers.


Best horse clean horse.

CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

Again, Torts took him to a very high mountain and showed him Nationwide and all its splendor.

"All this I will give you," he said, "if you will lay down and block for me." -Jackets 15:16



I think they need to include a 100 word essay from each of the horses' owners in the program as to what the hell the name of their horse means. Failure to provide a quasi-coherent explanation is grounds for disqualification.

"I gave our horse running in the Preakness the name Willy Sharted Himself because my uncle in 1979 named a horse Gus hosed Alice and laughed so hard that he had an accident. That pinnacle moment in our relationship was what inspired me to invest millions of dollars in horse racing and I felt desperate to fit in so, instead of naming my horse Chad or Andy or Bill or RuPaul, I wanted to pay homage to my uncle's bowel disaster."

runoverbobby posted:

Best horse clean horse.

Aerodynamics!

runoverbobby
Apr 21, 2007

Fighting like beavers.


My horse is called Switzerland because it's where I used to hide my money.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011



Hair Elf

When is the Preakness?

runoverbobby
Apr 21, 2007

Fighting like beavers.


It's at 6:45 assuming Pimlico doesn't suffer a structural failure.

marioinblack
Sep 21, 2007

Thanks Pham


runoverbobby posted:

It's at 6:45 assuming Pimlico doesn't suffer a structural failure.

I was at Pimlico last year and that track looks like it's always on the verge of a structural failure.

runoverbobby
Apr 21, 2007

Fighting like beavers.


It's falling apart and needs some serious upkeep, but there are less than two weeks of racing there per year and the owners seem intent on moving the Preakness to Laurel Park.

Argus Zant
Nov 18, 2012

Wer ist bereit zu tanzen?


wtf the Maryland state anthem is literally "O Christmas Tree"

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marioinblack
Sep 21, 2007

Thanks Pham


Belmont people gonna be happy that people might care about their race now.

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