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SuperMechagodzilla
Jun 9, 2007

NEWT REBORN


Horizon Burning posted:

funnily enough I don't hate snoke being made from Luke's hand but lmao I wish that'd been in the movies

This is why Rise Of Skywalker, despite being a garbage Star Wars movie, is the best of the ST. The Snoke clone twist is the high point of the series, and you don't even need Luke's hand in there to lol at it.

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CelticPredator
Oct 11, 2013



DesertIslandHermit posted:

All he needs to say is 'Last Jedi is pretty good, come to think of it' and that's all you need.

Rian Johnson was the guy who convinced him to direct and taught him some stuff.

The Shame Boy
Jan 27, 2014

Dead weight, just like this post.




YaketySass posted:

I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate's hand's clone.

...So what does that make us?

Bongo Bill
Jan 17, 2012



Cool hand, Luke.

Ingmar terdman
Jul 24, 2006



Bongo Bill posted:

Cool hand, Luke.

lol

mastershakeman
Oct 28, 2008


galagazombie posted:

Lol the new issue of the Darth Vader comic just revealed that Snoke is Luuke, complete with being grown from Luke's severed hand.

You have got to be kidding me, this poo poo would have been perfect in the opening crawl

The United States
Jul 18, 2004

Please grab the extinguisher


Melman v2

THE DEAD SPEAK

THE LUKE HANDS ARE CLONED

wyoming
Jun 7, 2010

Like a television
tuned to a dead channel.


Star Wars Episode IX
They Cloned Luke's Hand

wyoming fucked around with this message at 23:10 on May 2, 2021

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010



Head canon is now of Palps dumpster diving on Bespin and just tossing out Luke’s saber but keeping his hand kinda like Yoda digging through Luke’s supplies.

Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004

Nyah hah hah hah hah!


wyoming posted:

Star Wars Episode IX
They Snoked Luke's Hand

galenanorth
May 19, 2016



galagazombie posted:

Lol the new issue of the Darth Vader comic just revealed that Snoke is Luuke, complete with being grown from Luke's severed hand.

I love things like this that are funny but would also be deadly serious if a botched hand-clone was coming at you with a lightsaber. Should've been in the movies instead of Palpatine himself.

The last time I'd heard of Palpatine clones before the movie, I had heard of some EU comic with flying Palpatine clones in the context of "so at least the show creators have that already done so they can know what does and doesn't work", so when I heard the news in the run-up to its release, I thought they had to be bullshitting based on the existence of that.

Kart Barfunkel
Nov 10, 2009



This begs the question as to the whereabouts of Zam Wessell, Ponda Baba and the Wampa’s hands. They may not yield force wielding clones, but they could perhaps be crimelords or some other kind of lesser plot relevant antagonist.

Ingmar terdman
Jul 24, 2006



There's something there about how the hand was holding the youngling-killing sword that eventually comes around to kill the clone of the hand of the son of the youngling-killer. That dresses in gold in the style of his other son, see-threepio

YaketySass
Jan 15, 2019

Blind Idiot Dog


Bongo Bill posted:

Cool hand, Luke.

thrawn527
Mar 27, 2004

Thrawn/Pellaeon
Studying the art of terrorists
To keep you safe

Kart Barfunkel posted:

This begs the question as to the whereabouts of Zam Wessell, Ponda Baba and the Wampa’s hands. They may not yield force wielding clones, but they could perhaps be crimelords or some other kind of lesser plot relevant antagonist.

It doesn't really, though. Luke is the son of the Chosen One himself, and one of the most poweful Force users of all time (according to the EU, which the comics are a part of). Palpatine would have reason to want to clone him, in his weird mind. The three people you described are just, like, three people who aren't that special (maaaaybe Zam is kind of good at their job, but that's the closest you get? But it's not like we saw them succeed in the one job we saw them hired for.) and are easily just replaced by other people.

Ingmar terdman posted:

There's something there about how the hand was holding the youngling-killing sword that eventually comes around to kill the clone of the hand of the son of the youngling-killer. That dresses in gold in the style of his other son, see-threepio

I honestly wouldn't be surprised if this is eventually leading towards the story of Luke's lightsaber, either in this comic line or another. It's too silly and tantalizing a plot thread for the comic writers to leave hanging, especially if they've now established that someone found the hand.

Also, anyone saying that this proves that the new EU is worse than the old EU...this is literally from the old EU. At worst this is on the same level. They're both very dumb. It's both part of what makes them great and terrible.

Like the Wampa mentioned above. In the old EU, doesn't she end up becoming some sort of one armed Wampa queen on Hoth when Luke comes back? That is very silly and dumb.

thrawn527 fucked around with this message at 12:13 on May 3, 2021

Halloween Jack
Sep 11, 2003

Let your word be "Yes, Yes" or "No, No"; anything more than this comes from the evil one.




It's amazing how these people just totally spaced on the point Lucas was making when he had Obi-Wan treat lightsabers like they're sacred, only for he and Anakin to both lose their lightsabers constantly.

Kart Barfunkel
Nov 10, 2009



Why is a clone of Luke nine feet tall with claws?

Elias_Maluco
Aug 23, 2007
I need to sleep

I thought snokes were made out of baby yodas

Kart Barfunkel
Nov 10, 2009



Oh hey two things I used to like:

thrawn527
Mar 27, 2004

Thrawn/Pellaeon
Studying the art of terrorists
To keep you safe

Kart Barfunkel posted:

Why is a clone of Luke nine feet tall with claws?

Mistakes were made.

Kart Barfunkel
Nov 10, 2009



thrawn527 posted:

Mistakes were made.

‘Somehow, Luke returned’

Bongo Bill
Jan 17, 2012



Kart Barfunkel posted:

Why is a clone of Luke nine feet tall with claws?

If I were in charge of making sense of all this poo poo, I'd say it's because they caught the kid from The Mandalorian and harvested his midichlorians, and injected them into the Luke clone as part of an evil science experiment to make an overwhelmingly powerful psychic mutant, and the process led to these deformities.

Halloween Jack
Sep 11, 2003

Let your word be "Yes, Yes" or "No, No"; anything more than this comes from the evil one.




Kart Barfunkel posted:

Why is a clone of Luke nine feet tall with claws?
My interpretation is that when Palpatine made Snoke, he didn't want to gently caress around with actually training an apprentice who would inevitably betray him and so on. So he took a shortcut and made Snoke a powerful Force user by just jamming him full of midichlorians. He's cloned from the most powerful Jedi he could find, and he's 7 feet tall, to hold extra midichlorians. This resulted in him being kinda overcooked.

Schwarzwald
Jul 27, 2004

Don't Blink


Kart Barfunkel posted:

Why is a clone of Luke nine feet tall with claws?

Induced metamorphosis from iodine injection.

MonsieurChoc
Oct 12, 2013

Every species can smell its own extinction.




Stairmaster posted:

This is why gundam is the superior sci-fi franchise because they don't give a gently caress about canon

Doesn't stop people arguing about the Gundam Canon, despite Bandai/Sunrise officially not giving a gently caress.

Timeless Appeal
May 28, 2006


Halloween Jack posted:

My interpretation is that when Palpatine made Snoke, he didn't want to gently caress around with actually training an apprentice who would inevitably betray him and so on. So he took a shortcut and made Snoke a powerful Force user by just jamming him full of midichlorians. He's cloned from the most powerful Jedi he could find, and he's 7 feet tall, to hold extra midichlorians. This resulted in him being kinda overcooked.
Considering how the idea of genetically engineering or manipulating Jedi blood is a thing in the Mandalorian, I can see that.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Halloween Jack posted:

It's amazing how these people just totally spaced on the point Lucas was making when he had Obi-Wan treat lightsabers like they're sacred, only for he and Anakin to both lose their lightsabers constantly.

Probably doesn't help that at that point they're a lot more difficult to replace, but yeah. People treat a lot of very deliberate decisions about the prequels as accidents or oversights.


Bongo Bill posted:

If I were in charge of making sense of all this poo poo, I'd say it's because they caught the kid from The Mandalorian and harvested his midichlorians, and injected them into the Luke clone as part of an evil science experiment to make an overwhelmingly powerful psychic mutant, and the process led to these deformities.

And poor Snoke missed out on getting to bond with his dads.

CelticPredator
Oct 11, 2013



https://youtu.be/CO5BXrr44ME

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
ASK ME ABOUT MY SELF-PUBLISHED WARHAMMER FANFICTION AND MY KNIFE COLLECTION


Ghost Leviathan posted:

People treat a lot of very deliberate decisions about the prequels as accidents or oversights.

My favourite, simply due to the cultural cache he had at the time, will always be Maddox calling the very deliberate dramatic irony of Anakin's quest to save his wife leading to her death a plot hole. I'm not going to link to the site because holy poo poo it is so much uglier than I remember (and also somehow still going)

There's whole tracts of film internet that have always treated a film like a speedrun of the events depicted. Anything that isn't optimal is a plothole.

2house2fly
Nov 14, 2012

You did a super job wrapping things up! And I'm not just saying that because I have to!

My favourite is the red letter media videos showing a bunch of clips specifically contrasting prequel Yoda's wise mystic sayings against Obi-Wan saying "this weapon is your life" and such, with the point being that the prequels are bad for getting it wrong. I think at one point they literally show Mace Windu saying "we're keepers of the peace not soldiers" and then cut to the Jedi fighting in a war at the end, as if to point out a plot hole. And these guys love movies!!

I once saw a dude talking about TLJ say "did you notice how at the start Luke scoffs at the idea of facing down the First Order with his laser sword, then at the end that's exactly what he does" in a smug sort of "Rian Johnson is an idiot" way. Like uh, yeah I did, that was on purpose

E: also The Editing Room said that Luke being born before Leia introduced a continuity error in the original movies, and I never understood what that meant at all

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Snowman_McK posted:

My favourite, simply due to the cultural cache he had at the time, will always be Maddox calling the very deliberate dramatic irony of Anakin's quest to save his wife leading to her death a plot hole. I'm not going to link to the site because holy poo poo it is so much uglier than I remember (and also somehow still going)

There's whole tracts of film internet that have always treated a film like a speedrun of the events depicted. Anything that isn't optimal is a plothole.

'Tactical realism' is the most inexplicable curse on nerd discouse, and led to basically an entire genre in the form of isekai that's in its purest form is just describing speedruns in narrative.

CelticPredator
Oct 11, 2013



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3A8kdCk_fM

Timeless Appeal
May 28, 2006


2house2fly posted:

E: also The Editing Room said that Luke being born before Leia introduced a continuity error in the original movies, and I never understood what that meant at all
It's probably in reference to Leia having memories of her mom. Return of the Jedi actually gives you the impression that her mother died when Leia was young. But honestly, the Luke/Leia twist is just not great in RotJ and it's really hard to make sense of why any of the details we are given work out the way they do. So, it feels petty to blame the prequels.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised




Timeless Appeal posted:

It's probably in reference to Leia having memories of her mom. Return of the Jedi actually gives you the impression that her mother died when Leia was young. But honestly, the Luke/Leia twist is just not great in RotJ and it's really hard to make sense of why any of the details we are given work out the way they do. So, it feels petty to blame the prequels.

Yeah, iirc they don't go into any of the context about how they actually are siblings, which you'd think would be significant given Leia is royalty and Luke was raised by an aunt and uncle on the rear end end of the galaxy. The prequels still basically gloss over that, iirc Leia's adoptive father is supposed to be a significant character but I barely remember him?

I should watch the Clone Wars where a pre-Empire Tarkin apparently shows up as a Republic Army officer.

fatherboxx
Mar 25, 2013



Ghost Leviathan posted:

The prequels still basically gloss over that, iirc Leia's adoptive father is supposed to be a significant character but I barely remember him?

He is in this hilarious scene

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FPtvBP8S0ZM

And stands next to Padme in "this is how liberty dies" scene which, imo, is enough to set him up as future backer of the Rebellion. Jimmy Smits has screen presence.

HaitianDivorce
Jul 29, 2012


fatherboxx posted:

He is in this hilarious scene

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FPtvBP8S0ZM

And stands next to Padme in "this is how liberty dies" scene which, imo, is enough to set him up as future backer of the Rebellion. Jimmy Smits has screen presence.

IIRC there's also cut stuff where he, Padme, and maybe Mon Mothma lay the groundwork for the rebellion?

Ingmar terdman
Jul 24, 2006



Jimmy Smitts also does that defeated knuckle tap on the balcony at the end of AOTC


It's funny how they've given up on "star wars is fun" and are gradually going for "star wars is church"

Payndz
Sep 22, 2006

I'm Peter Graves, and I was wondering if you could direct me to the natatorium, as I'm attending a Scuderia Ferrari team-building exercise. Thank you. I'm Peter Graves.


Still think that if they're going to keep changing poo poo in Episode 4, they should add Jimmy Smits on Alderaan looking up at the Death Star and doing a big "NOOOOOOOOO!" as it fires.

Jimmy Smits.

Ingmar terdman
Jul 24, 2006



Payndz posted:

Still think that if they're going to keep changing poo poo in Episode 4, they should add Jimmy Smits on Alderaan looking up at the Death Star and doing a big "NOOOOOOOOO!" as it fires.

Jimmy Smits.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icXUaYixO9c

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Gargamel Gibson
Apr 24, 2014


Timeless Appeal posted:

It's probably in reference to Leia having memories of her mom. Return of the Jedi actually gives you the impression that her mother died when Leia was young.

I thought Leia was pretty young when Padmé died.


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