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Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

client posted:

incredibly powerful especially if you use this voice

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HL6YARuMRwk

lol

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Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

i rather play DOTA

remigious
May 13, 2009

Destruction comes inevitably


Lipstick Apathy

Its raid night.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Nap Ghost

I have smelly penis

Meredith Baxter-Burnout
Jul 4, 2003

Let the KIDS!!! eat what they want!..LOL..Come on out to Doobie's!


"Have you read my posting history?!"

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

Grimey Drawer

remigious posted:

It’s raid night.

GamingHyena
Jul 25, 2003

Devil's Advocate

#71: I quit last week.

drat, you quit sex last week? I was SO close!

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Nap Ghost

#73 I have to go to the bathroom

It's cool bb we can have sex in the bathroom

1st_Panzer_Div.
May 11, 2005

Phoenixes we can believe in

Grimey Drawer

#115 Jesus isn't with us
#117 I left my dick in my other pant

Edit: One from the f'd up church I fled from that was brought up in church by the pastor as a pathetic excuse his wife needed to get over "I just gave birth and it's really sore still"

1st_Panzer_Div. fucked around with this message at May 16, 2018 around 05:53

GamingHyena
Jul 25, 2003

Devil's Advocate

#118: You can't tell me what to do. You're not my real dad.

dudeness
Mar 5, 2010


31 and 32 are some rough poo poo taken together.

1st_Panzer_Div.
May 11, 2005

Phoenixes we can believe in

Grimey Drawer

#119 I only have sex with my real dad

Bored
Jul 26, 2007

Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

#85, 27, 70, 42.

Alternatively, wait until he pulls his dick out, then use #42.

I feel like I'm ordering from a Chinese menu.

Applewhite posted:

I have smelly penis

#16

#120: I know this is just the first date, but I really feel a connection with you.

Bored fucked around with this message at May 16, 2018 around 06:02

my kinda ape
Sep 15, 2008

Everything's gonna be A-OK


Hair Elf

Yes....psych!

Bored
Jul 26, 2007

Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

#121: "only if you say hi to my cat. Here, let me call him. I got one of those pet selfie cameras you put on a treat dispenser....Mr Wiiiiggles...sometimes it takes a little while for him to show up..."

PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan


With all these diseases that you obviously have? No thanks buster.

Soul Reaver
Mar 8, 2009

in retrospect the old redtext was a little over the top, I think I was in a bad mood that day. it appears you've learned your lesson about slagging our gods and masters at beamdog but I'm still going to leave this av up because i think its funny

god bless


That's not how you use that pamphlet.

If someone has propositioned you for sex that you don't want to have, just take a deep breath, pull out that pamphlet, and start rattling the reasons off one after another, only pausing when you need to take another breath.

That's how you say no to sex.

Autistic Edgy Guy
Jan 21, 2017

screaming at bare ass

Former DILF posted:

#102 I like anime

#103 I literally am anime.

EX250 Type R
Mar 7, 2013



https://www.teamdan69.com


#28 is generally what my partners learn after sex (it's not worth it)

Risky
May 18, 2003



#124 These Warhammer figures aren't gonna paint themselves.

Sekenr
Dec 12, 2013



Let's break up until you can wait ??

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

In a world gone mad,
we will not spank the monkey,
but the monkey will spank us.

Im gay.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS


Nap Ghost

1: nein
2: nyet
3: bu
4...

Risky
May 18, 2003



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s01MH6P-ezs

This seems appropriate for this thread

Ralph Crammed In
May 11, 2007
Let's get clean and smart

#80 is true. I've had sex and I don't have a career.

Swedish Butt-Whistle
Feb 12, 2004

Mentally Trill


Never hear any goons saying 43, I dont like kids

discarded box
Oct 15, 2008


thank god for this list. i was running out of ways to tell all the ladies no

some of these have troubling subtext

discarded box fucked around with this message at May 16, 2018 around 10:15

Alucard
Mar 11, 2002


#125 - Sorry, but I'm already full of cum.

discarded box
Oct 15, 2008


i just love you too dang much to have sex, sorry

Suspect A
Jan 1, 2015


#-1 My penis has negative length so it would be physically impossible to have sex.

Charles
May 9, 2004

O Ahuramazda,
grant us your flame


Toilet Rascal

1) no
2) no
3) no
4) no
5) no
6) no
7) no
8) no
9) no
10) no
11) no
12) no
13) no
14) no
15) no
16) no
17) no
18) no
19) no
20) no
21) no
22) no
23) no
24) no
25) no
26) no
27) no
28) no
29) no
30) no
31) no
32) no
33) no
34) no
35) no
36) no
37) no
38) no
39) no
40) no
41) no
42) no
43) no
44) no
45) no
46) no
47) no
48) no
49) no
50) no
51) no
52) no
53) no
54) no
55) no
56) no
57) no
58) no
59) no
60) no
61) no
62) no
63) no
64) no
65) no
66) no
67) no
68) no
69) no
70) no
71) no
72) no
73) no
74) no
75) no
76) no
77) no
78) no
79) no
80) no
81) no
82) no
83) no
84) no
85) no
86) no
87) no
88) no
89) no
90) no
91) no
92) no
93) no
94) no
95) no
96) no
97) no
98) no
99) no
100) no
101) no

Suspect A
Jan 1, 2015


#67: no way fag

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004

Thank You,
Thank You,
Thank You GOD!


Nooner posted:

coach says he wont have any fornicators on his team, cant have them shefolk stealing our masculine essence if we wanna make state

loooool

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004

Thank You,
Thank You,
Thank You GOD!


imagine being a grown adult human being and denying yourself sex like some cloistered rear end in a top hat lmao.

discarded box
Oct 15, 2008


Suspect A posted:

#67: no way f**

whoa man we dont use that word anymore

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014



im gay

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

It's your HPV, Veronica. I'm just carrying it.

#102 I can't have sex unless you're a 4000 year old vampire with cat ears also you don't have a penis

ate all the Oreos
Mar 2, 2010

THE HORROR
THE HORROR



Personally I like a good ol' #16 "I'M SCARED" yelled awkwardly at the top of my lungs whenever anyone gets within the no no zone of less than a foot away from me

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016



Just tell her you're gay, Ray

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Dr. Gojo Shioji
Apr 22, 2004



Swedish Butt-Whistle posted:

Never hear any goons saying 43, I dont like kids

Not aatrek, anyway.

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