The Noble Weiner dog: Framed! Unbend Your Knees Haha

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > The Noble Weiner dog: Framed! Unbend Your Knees Haha

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

Perhaps the most ignoble death possible

http://time.com/5280769/dog-attack-dachshund-woman-oklahoma-death/ posted:

A woman in Oklahoma died after being attacked by a pack of small, fleabitten dogs belonging to a neighbor.

Tracy Garcia, 52, was killed in an attack by seven small dogs near her home outside Ardmore, Okla., Carter County Sheriff Chris Bryant told the Associated Press. Garcia died from her injuries on May 10.

Bryant said each dog weighed less than 40 pounds. One dog was shot by a police officer, while the rest were euthanized at Ardmore Animal Shelter, local outlet KXII reported.

Six of the dogs were likely dachshund-terrier mixes, and one was a border collie mix, according to the shelter�s euthanasia technician Amanda Dinwiddie. Four were male dogs and three were female, and all were between a year and three years old, she said.

Dinwiddie said the dogs did not have an apparent health concerns, apart from all of them being covered in fleas and ticks.

�You can tell they have been living out in the woods,� she said.

Police are investigating whether criminal charges should be filed following the attack.

According to an obituary, Garcia was a healthcare worker, homemaker and housekeeper throughout her life. She is survived by a son and daughter.

IMO if dachshunds are able to eat you, you deserve to be eaten by them

Super Grocery Kart posted:

Hahahahahahahaha How The gently caress Is Being Murdered By Wiener Dogs Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Stand Up Like Nigga Unbend Your Knees Haha

UPDATE

font color sea posted:

Turns out apparently they weren't actually wiener dogs, or at least purebred ones. http://blog.dogsbite.org/2018/05/dog-bite-fatality-ardmore-woman-killed-by-dogs.html?m=1 So what they were? Guess what, fookin pibbles. It's always pibbles.

This thread is now about the idea of being murdered by wiener dogs, not the discussion of any actual news regarding it

Devils Affricate fucked around with this message at 19:54 on May 19, 2018

# ¿ May 17, 2018 18:36

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 02:21

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

Zane posted:

pop culture has all the wrong ideas about daschunds. they were bred to take on badgers. breeders have somewhat mellowed them out since the 19th century. but a lot of them are still vicious ill-tempered little fuckers.

Yes they are horrible little things, but 7 of them shouldn't be able to take you down

They can't even jump high and they are perfectly shaped/sized for kicking, not dissimilar to a football

# ¿ May 17, 2018 19:27

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

remigious posted:

This reminds me of a conversation I overheard outside a target.
A woman was holding her wiener dog. Another woman walks up and says, �is that a dachshund?�
�No,� the lady with the dog said, �it�s a wiener dog.�

Holy poo poo I actually just posted the link to a coworker with no further explanation other than "lol" and the conversation went something like this:

"Why would you lol at this? This is a horrible story"
"Because they're weiner dogs dude"
"Oh LOL I didn't read the article, just the title"
"It's in the title..."
"Oh dachshund means wiener dog?"

I chastised him for it and he got really defensive

# ¿ May 17, 2018 19:35

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

SciFiDownBeat posted:

dogs should have the same restrictions as cars:

- license and registration should be required by law

This is already how dogs work (except in shithole areas)

quote:

- if you own one and it kills someone (even if someone else is using it), you go to prison except in cases of self defense

This is not how cars work

# ¿ May 17, 2018 20:22

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

Dr. Quarex posted:

The reporter and the euthanasia lady both think it is a Dash Hound, which I am afraid to Goog as I am 100% positive I will be depressed to learn this is the standard way Americans say it somehow

Edit: Look I get it, my speech therapist mother was and is a pedant, but I cannot live in this Dash Hound Reesee-Cup world

I think it's one of those things where someone at some point made up a more elegant/foreign sounding pronunciation and other people ran with it thinking it's the more correct way to say it, like with cache and forte (yes, forte is supposed to be pronounced as "fort", sorry if I just blew your mind)

# ¿ May 17, 2018 22:08

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

Jolo posted:

Not sure what's worse, murdered by wiener dogs or wienered by murder dogs.

They both suck because in both cases the dogs clearly aren't doing what they're actually good at

# ¿ May 17, 2018 22:16

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

Super Grocery Kart posted:

Hahahahahahahaha How The gently caress Is Being Murdered By Wiener Dogs Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Stand Up Like Nigga Unbend Your Knees Haha

Adding this to the OP

# ¿ May 18, 2018 23:28

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 02:21

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

criscodisco posted:

What sort of desperate rear end pit bull out there loving wienerdog ladies

Or it could have been a brave wiener dude who knows what he likes

edit: updated the OP, only mods can change titles right?

Devils Affricate fucked around with this message at 19:59 on May 19, 2018

# ¿ May 19, 2018 19:56

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