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Amateur Saboteur

Wear the hat nigga
When we are nuked to all poo poo, or release the nano bots, or gammy rays or chem trials or a black whole int he center of the planet.

Which animal will inevitably find our Nextel phones and be like "hmm". Next thing they are walking around in pant suits, playing shuffleboard, and driving our fieri sports cars. My money's on dolphins ?

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Chasterson


I dunno whats gonna be next but I think they are going to be best friends with pigs instead of dogs

Theyll still like dogs they just wont be best friends like we are

ulvir

Jeg estimerer deg ikke.

if octopuses could learn how to live more than five years they'd be up there. they'd be all "good morning" when coming into work and need coffee to stay awake, etc but since they have several arms they would be really efficient at computer stuff

Manifisto


I recently saw something about bees understanding the idea of zero . . . like a proper numeric conception, something that virtually no other non-primate possesses.

while I am not sure how understanding zero will promote survival in the post-apocalyptic hellscape, I really like the idea of big fat fluffy bees driving a sportscar. also I guess maybe the bees will be able to dial 1-800 numbers on the phones they find, that's useful I guess?


thanks to Splatmaster and vanisher for the sigs!

Luvcow


Manifisto posted:

I recently saw something about bees understanding the idea of zero . . . like a proper numeric conception, something that virtually no other non-primate possesses.

while I am not sure how understanding zero will promote survival in the post-apocalyptic hellscape, I really like the idea of big fat fluffy bees driving a sportscar. also I guess maybe the bees will be able to dial 1-800 numbers on the phones they find, that's useful I guess?

*bee cop arrives on the scene: a shiny new sportscar parked on the side of the road, door still open, the dead body of a privileged young bee slumped onto the sidewalk, his stinger ripped from his body and stuck deep within the posh leather seat*

"goddamnit... why does this keep happening..."



Splatmaster


HAIKOOLIGAN

I like to imagine a future world populated by sentient kangaroos. They at least have the evolutionary advantage of having pockets

BYOB fun all year long! Sigs by: Manifisto and Vanisher, awesome BYOB people!!

Manifisto


post apocalypse monkey finding a bret easton ellis novel: what is this sorcery . . . we must worship it as our new god

bee: actually it's self-indulgent trash

ulvir

Jeg estimerer deg ikke.

*bee voice* this car goes from naught to 60 in 3,2 seconds!

Luvcow


*bee in a business suit on lunch break in the corporate gardens outside his office building, grinding his butt into a patch of flowers*

"ohhh...ohh yeah... that's the stuff"



Manifisto


bee that's had one too many, talking to an artificial flower: baby . . . baby you're so beautiful, why you gotta be like that?

Jolo

ive been playing with magnuts tying to change the wold as we know it

Splatmaster posted:

I like to imagine a future world populated by sentient kangaroos. They at least have the evolutionary advantage of having pockets

Kangaroo leaving the house in the morn, "Ok, phone, keys, wallet, joey... check check check... JOEY! C'mon we've gotta go, let's go!"

Joey Lawrence from the other room, "Whoa!"

MockingQuantum

I think we'll all die from a ground-level extinction event so the next rulers of the earth will be arboreal

Gonna be a tight society of red pandas and tree frogs in dapper suits and dockers

thank you FactsAreUseless and Vanisher for the summeriest of sigs!

Plant MONSTER.

you owe your life to plants. think about it.

be grateful.
Corn: Hear me out, humans plant a lot of corn. It's well known that nuclear radiation can make plants alive and capable of speech and love. Corn plants can be boys or girls but however, the corn people are so advanced that they do not care if a boy corn loves a boy corn or if girl corn loves a girl

MockingQuantum

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Corn: Hear me out, humans plant a lot of corn. It's well known that nuclear radiation can make plants alive and capable of speech and love. Corn plants can be boys or girls but however, the corn people are so advanced that they do not care if a boy corn loves a boy corn or if girl corn loves a girl

excellent username/post combo, thank you for this kernel of wisdom

thank you FactsAreUseless and Vanisher for the summeriest of sigs!

alnilam




ulvir posted:

if octopuses could learn how to live more than five years they'd be up there. they'd be all "good morning" when coming into work and need coffee to stay awake, etc but since they have several arms they would be really efficient at computer stuff

posting on byob at maximumn efficiency

Cubone

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.
maybe there won't be one
no conscious, tool-using animal that adapts by harnessing its environment

just elephants and capybara hanging out and being nice, and gibbons and penguins goofing around and humping, and dogs doing a little of both

Amateur Saboteur

Wear the hat nigga

Cubone posted:

maybe there won't be one
no conscious, tool-using animal that adapts by harnessing its environment

just elephants and capybara hanging out and being nice, and gibbons and penguins goofing around and humping, and dogs doing a little of both
imagine a squirrel passing up pa rappa the rappa on playstation. Now extrapolate that 3000+ years and realize how silly you look and sound

Amateur Saboteur

Wear the hat nigga

Plant MONSTER. posted:

Corn: Hear me out, humans plant a lot of corn. It's well known that nuclear radiation can make plants alive and capable of speech and love. Corn plants can be boys or girls but however, the corn people are so advanced that they do not care if a boy corn loves a boy corn or if girl corn loves a girl
This one corny rear end post son. of course corny is the ultimate superlative in corn culture because why wouldn't it be

MockingQuantum

Amateur Saboteur posted:

This one corny rear end post son. of course corny is the ultimate superlative in corn culture because why wouldn't it be

well "corny" has fallen somewhat out of use with the younger ears, they like to use the term "poppin"

thank you FactsAreUseless and Vanisher for the summeriest of sigs!

Manifisto


Amateur Saboteur

Wear the hat nigga

MockingQuantum posted:

well "corny" has fallen somewhat out of use with the younger ears, they like to use the term "poppin"

Farecoal

???

well according to this one very accurate documentary i watched million of years in the future there will be communities of small sapient squids living among the treetops in the rainforests of a new pangea

also giant squids with no bones and massive muscled legs will be walking around

Manifisto


Farecoal posted:

also giant squids with no bones and massive muscled legs will be walking around

oh god, is that why these things were invented? is someone preparing the way for the earth's eventual squid overlords? what do they know??

Nosfereefer


Manifisto posted:

oh god, is that why these things were invented? is someone preparing the way for the earth's eventual squid overlords? what do they know??



there is no way that is as fun as those actors are implying

Nosfereefer


if my boss suggested we do that for some kind of stupid team building exercise i would quit on the spot

Nosfereefer


if i was on a family vacation with the folks and my mum showed up with that for a fun family activity i would seriously consider a restraining order

Nosfereefer


if my mates wanted to do this for a laugh, i would find better friends

Nosfereefer


it's offensively lame, and whatever animal comes next we def had whatever happened coming

Luvcow


well i guess it's better than being an unwilling part of a human centipede, but not by much



Luvcow


Manifisto posted:

oh god, is that why these things were invented? is someone preparing the way for the earth's eventual squid overlords? what do they know??



ok i found the site where this came from and that thing costs $20,000
https://www.thrillist.com/gear/the-...hould-be-riding

also on the list is this monstrosity in which parents can put their kids up front as some kind of mad max style battering ram of horrors:


dad: hey timmy! we're going to plow into the johnsons at high speed and plunder their belongings!

timmy: haha! you're so funny dad! this is fun!

dad: yeah... funny.... *peddles harder and leers at the fleeing johnson bike car*



Manifisto


Nosfereefer posted:

there is no way that is as fun as those actors are implying

dr. cudd l. fish, director of the transportation department of the Institute For Future Studies And Also Incidentally Invertebrate Marine Biology, assures me that studies have proven that the octocycle is objectively fun. "another activity that is surprisingly enjoyable is shrimp breeding," he says. "creating tanks upon tanks of large shrimp with easy-to-open lids. not as human food, just to have around. it creates a feeling of security and is highly recommended."


thanks to Splatmaster and vanisher for the sigs!

MockingQuantum

Nosfereefer posted:

there is no way that is as fun as those actors are implying

we have those in my city, but they're a little bigger, have roofs, wander around the scenic part of downtown at a glacial pace, and serve beer

they're called pedal pubs

and still less fun than you'd think

thank you FactsAreUseless and Vanisher for the summeriest of sigs!

Manifisto


Luvcow posted:

ok i found the site where this came from and that thing costs $20,000
https://www.thrillist.com/gear/the-...hould-be-riding

also on the list is this monstrosity in which parents can put their kids up front as some kind of mad max style battering ram of horrors:


dad: hey timmy! we're going to plow into the johnsons at high speed and plunder their belongings!

timmy: haha! you're so funny dad! this is fun!

dad: yeah... funny.... *peddles harder and leers at the fleeing johnson bike car*

mom: brittany honey you're so good at using that forward mounted squirt cannon, you're a lot more accurate than your brother. *pulls out a canister of gasoline* so what do you say we spice things up a little?

Luvcow


Manifisto posted:

mom: brittany honey you're so good at using that forward mounted squirt cannon, you're a lot more accurate than your brother. *pulls out a canister of gasoline* so what do you say we spice things up a little?



alnilam




Manifisto posted:

mom: brittany honey you're so good at using that forward mounted squirt cannon, you're a lot more accurate than your brother. *pulls out a canister of gasoline* so what do you say we spice things up a little?

the beginning of the end

Amateur Saboteur

Wear the hat nigga

Manifisto posted:

mom: brittany honey you're so good at using that forward mounted squirt cannon, you're a lot more accurate than your brother. *pulls out a canister of gasoline* so what do you say we spice things up a little?

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Amateur Saboteur

Wear the hat nigga
just think how cringe worthy sitting through Emperors New Groove as an al paca must be

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