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SgCloud
Oct 30, 2011

Neddy Seagoon posted:



Tell me, Alice; have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

Completely overlooked that one, glad it's in.

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Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"

SgCloud posted:

Completely overlooked that one, glad it's in.

That'd be because I just made it :ssh:.

Kanfy
Jan 9, 2012

Just gotta keep walking down that road.
Yuri is very good but the other party members dunking on him is also always a joy.

And this is of course a classic line:

The Dark Id
Aug 13, 2005

Why
you
know
I
LOVE
THIS SHIT !!!!
[citation needed]
Episode XLVII: Father Doyle


Music: Wind Which Blows From the Dark II




We're now given the option to reshuffle our party yet again (and Meiyuan's stalker rear end can change it up after this point for whatever reason.) We're gonna go ahead and swap out Keith for the newly returned Margarete. I'm gonna be real... Keith never really got a lot of play in my party. There are very rarely Light elemental enemies while more than a handful (including the very next major boss) is Dark elemental making him less than ideal on that front. Plus Margarete is a smidgen faster than him while only being a few ticks weaker physically overall. Plus, his Judgment Wheel configuration is just weird and I could never nail reliably. Not a fan of the first Hit Area being IMMEDIATELY after selecting attack.



Margarete has been boosted up to Level 28 for her reunion, which is what the game expects the party (outside Yuri obviously) to be roughly at by this point. We're literally right there at the moment. So that works out fine!



They were even nice enough to automatically equip Margarete with updated equipment (accessories aside.) Margarete comes packing a "Zeruel" which I think is vaguely meant to be a Sauer 1913 or some Frankensteined gun close to that. At least, looking at a bunch of old guns that is one that looked vaguely like this gun even if it had different ammo size and the fact it's probably not actually a machine gun. If anyone knows a better match, let me know. I cannot say I'm an expert on early 1900s pistols. Especially ones vaguely unstuck from time in an alternate history setting. Zeruel only gets me one of the Angels from Evangelion (it was the one with the razor tape arms.)



Margarete also comes sporting a stylish Jasper Cape which is the most current female armor set available at this point. So that saves us some cash upgrading. We can hit up the Silent Peddler to get Alice a matching outfit to upgrade her armor as well, alongside a set of Thriller jackets for the boys.



Speaking of the Silent Peddler, now that we have a full party again we can go ahead and upgrade everyone here. For instance...



Alice has gotten cursed twice but I think she has evaded possession. So far, at least... But if it comes up, we're set. The Ever-Bible offers 53 Physical and 64 Special Attack Power for use in Alice's continued misunderstanding of how to use books.



Zhuzhen is probably going to be benched until further notice. But that doesn't mean we cannot buy him some more canes to give him the glimmer of hope he'll return to the active party. We get 52 Physical and 61 Special Attack out of this bopping stick.



Keith gets a Witcher's silver sword to slay monsters when necessary. You should play The Witcher 3: Blood and Wine if you haven't yet. It has some chill vampires to hang out within it. And extremely unchill ones as well. Perfect for Halloween season! Anyway, this new sword offers a boost of 40 Physical and 20 Special Attack. If Keith's items seem like they're underwhelming compared to others, just remember he came in WAY later than everyone else and defaulted to much higher stats so his weapon boosts are comparatively lighter to balance it out.



Finally, the ladies get a companion to the Loin Guard in the form of protective Charming Pareo as an accessory. Is there a difference between these and a sarong? Hmm... Nope. They're literally just different words for the same glorified beach wrap for women's swimsuits. You learn something new every day!


Music: But-Dad-Dead-Bed






Leaving the confines of the hotel, an evil fog has descended upon the city of Rouen and frozen all of the loitering townsfolk with a curse that only allows them to speak in quotes from Final Fantasy VIII protagonist, Squall Leonhart. A dire fate indeed.




Music: NDE - Near Death Experience




Random battles have also stricken the town's streets. Bifronzes are now among the trash mobs. I guess Arcane Olga just went "gently caress it" and released her entire reserve stock of the jobbers. They're unchanged from their less than impressive first outing in the first encounter earlier. The only reason I'm bringing them up is their name origin. Bifronze is a mistranslation of Bifrons.

Wikipedia on Bifrons posted:


Click here for more!


In demonology (Specifically: The Lesser Key of Solomon), Bifrons is a demon, Earl of Hell, with sixty legions of demons (sixty-six according to other authors) under his command. He teaches sciences and arts, the virtues of the gems and woods, herbs, and changes corpses from their original grave into other places, sometimes putting magick lights on the graves that appear like candles. He first appears as a monster, but then changes his shape into that of a man.

The origin of the name is the Roman god, Janus (Ianus Bifrons.)
Sure, I guess that a black color-swap Wind Shear can fill that role.





Joining the Bifronze are yellow palette swaps of the Bird Men from back in Bistritz. They will cast Lightning and literally do nothing else of note. Yuri or Margarete can easily kill one of 'em in a single turn. Heck, Alice gets pretty close too. They only have 158 HP to their name. While utterly unremarkable, their name also has an origin of some interest.

Wikipedia on Camazotz posted:


Click here for more!


In Maya mythology, Camazotz was a bat god. Camazotz means "death bat" in the K'iche' language. In Mesoamerica, the bat was associated with night, death, and sacrifice.

In the Popol Vuh, Camazotz is the bat-like monsters encountered by the Maya Hero Twins Hunahpu and Xbalanque during their trials in the underworld of Xibalba. The twins had to spend the night in the House of Bats where they squeezed themselves into their own blowguns in order to defend themselves from the circling bats. Hunahpu stuck his head out of his blowgun to see if the sun had risen and Camazotz immediately snatched off his head and carried it to the ball court to be hung up as the ball to be used by the gods in their next ballgame.
Getting your head torn off for use in a deity's B-Ball game is a pretty badass way to go out. Anyway, bats...? Yellow crows...? Same difference!


Music: But-Dad-Dead-Bed




In order to progress, we need to get to the church and talk to this Father Doyle (lovely traditional French name.) The front door is locked tight. But if we return to where Alice's father got telefragged, or however Roger Bacon exploded him into bits, we can try the back door instead.





Here we find a new Judgment Ring challenge. I barely even remember the last time the game forced a glorified QTE to progress but here we are now. This one, as the description suggests, is a gauntlet of three Judgment Ring spins of increased speed in a row. There's no penalty here for failing other than Yuri smashing his foot on the door and looking the fool before trying again. But hey, here we go!



<laughs and walks in> Hey! Take a look!



Yep... That sure is the back entrance of a small church, Yuri. Before we go forward, we're going to go ahead and equip a Shell Bracelet (Nulls Poison) on the entire party. No real reason. Just seems proper for setting foot on the holy ground, ya know? In any event, let's continue forward and see if we cannot find that priest, eh?


Music: Angel Heart




Hey, we're just here to talk.
A-Are you burglars?
Nope. Not burglars?
How, how did you get in here? I locked all the doors.
...
...OK, so MAYBE we broke in. But it's not to rob or hurt you or anything!


An elderly priest enters from the back room.



Wh-what do you want?! H-have you come to kill me?!
Father Doyle!! It’s me, Alice Elliot!!

Alice approaches Father Doyle.



Th-that’s impossible! Alice was kidnapped by the Devil a long time ago. S-she can’t be alive…
I’m sorry to scare you, but it is me. I’m finally back in this town.
I just got taken to East Asia, not dragged to hell.
<steps forward> Is it really you, Alice?! N-no, I don’t believe it. You can’t fool me! You’re just an illusion!

Father Doyle takes a step back, puts his hand on his heart and raises his hand.



Psst. Are all those Vatican Church guys or whatever a few screws loose like this guy?
Ehh... That... is a loaded question...

Please, Father Doyle. Tell me about the man my father was trying to meet that day. I want to know. Whatever it takes, I must stop Roger Bacon.
<jumps back in shock> B-Bacon?! No-o-o-o! Wait! I-I’ll tell you everything! J-Just please spare my life… P-please…! Don’t kill me…
This is quite serious. He thinks we’re all Bacon’s lackeys. He must have gone through some unimaginably dreadful experience.
I guess he didn't pick up the part where she said we wanna stop Bacon, huh?
You said it yourself... Does the man look like he's fully parsing the situation?
Yeah...

Father, relax! We’re not gonna do anything to you. Just answer our questions. That’s all we want, okay?
Okay, okay. Anything you say…
Look, just calm down and let's talk this ou--wait, what?
OK. I'll tell you everything.
Oh... I thought we were gonna have to... Err... Yeah, OK! Cool!


Father Doyle crosses his heart and makes a prayer to the cross.




Alice... I’ll tell you everything I know about your father.
...
It all started 23 years ago.

The distraught priest walks to the center of the aisle and shakes his head.



The books contained forbidden secrets of sorcery and alchemy… Long held under lock and key by the Pope, the disappearance of the books caused the Vatican to panic. They immediately called in two of the finest exorcists to find and recover the secret books. One was your father, Father Morris Elliot.




Hey, now! That's a name that you should know if you've played Shadow Hearts' predecessor, Koudelka (or more likely read the LP I did immediately prior to this one!)



Father James O'Flaherty was one of the three playable characters from the previous title. He was tasked by the Vatican to track down the Émigré Document -- an ancient text written by a lost race of goat dudes from Wales called the Formor which held a variety of magical secrets regarding such topics as immortality (which Roger Bacon used and then tossed in the trash so nobody else could have it) but more chiefly the secrets of resurrecting the dead. Father O'Flaherty's old college buddy Patrick Heyward apparently obtained the book from the Vatican's archives by vague means and was using it to resurrect his dead wife, Elaine, in a Welsh monastery. Apparently the secret sauce for resurrection involved essentially a huge rear end build-up of Malice which was achieved by, you know, just murdering several hundred drifters and prostitutes over the years.



Ultimately, Patrick Hayward and the Émigré Document managed to resurrect his wife... as a soulless abomination that immediately murdered the poo poo out of him and the monastery in question became a monster and ghost filled hellhole even by Welsh standards. The events of Koudelka transpired there. Long story short, a wandering spirit medium, a dipshit punchman thief and Father O'Flaherty had a very bad night in Nemeton Monastery which ultimately ended up with Elaine and James getting raptured by The Lord (Catholic Priests are capable of summoning God as a one-time assist in a pinch in this universe), the monastery exploding and the Émigré Document never actually being recovered.

If you were negligent in reading the Koudelka LP, now is probably the time to mend your ways because the events of that game start becoming far more relevant going forward. But back to Father Doyle's chatter for now...



The two of them wandered through Europe for many years in search of the missing volumes. They traveled together at first, but when a daughter was born to Elliot, they traveled separately.
Hmm... I could have sworn I read Catholic clergy were sworn to celibacy.
There are exceptions from time to time in fringe cases.
Priests on a secret mission directly from the Vatican seems kind of in the thick of things and not very fringe.
Ergh... There are more pressing matters to discuss than the intricacies of the faith. As I was saying...

Then, in 1899, Father O’Flaherty disappeared in England.
It was around that time a monastery in Aberystwyth, Wales was destroyed in a cataclysm but there was no confirmation Father O'Flaherty was involved. It could have just been one of the many fonts of evil flaring up in the cursed land...
I remember that! I was only 5 or 6 years old. It was all in that last letter he sent to my father. It said that one of the books had been purchased by a scholar living in Wales, so he went to take a look.
There was also a lot about heathens and disparaging immigrants for his lack of progress. It was a troubling correspondence.
<shakes head> But no second letter ever came.
Afterwards, Father Elliot began to hunt for the criminal himself. And then, he finally found him.
And it was Roger Bacon!
Yes. But Father Elliot was terrified of Bacon. As well he should have been. Bacon’s a thousand-year-old demon! There’s no humanity left in him. Your father had to protect his wife and daughter, but he knew that if those books were defiled, terrible forces of hell could be summoned to earth…
<paces the room> So, that was the Demon’s Gate Invocation… Curse you, Bacon! You steal a holy book and then defile it with your foul experiments?! Blasphemy…
<walks back to the altar> In order to discover Bacon’s weak points, he continued to look for someone who could help him. That person was also a great warlock and had a history of conflict with Bacon. Fortunately, I was able to contact him. I was certain that he would prove to be a powerful ally.
Huh? So, this other guy you’re talkin’ about… Who is he?



Alice, that is the man that your father was waiting for that evening.
Albert Simon…
So, this cardinal that Bacon didn’t want your father to meet…
Father, where is Cardinal Simon now?
Gah! You spooked me! I forgot you were here!
It's a church. I am trying to be respectful.
Aren't vampires like... not good with crosses and churches and junk?
Nonsense. I used to attend mass every Sunday.
...Huh. Weird.
Could you all hush and let Father Doyle finish conveying the very important information that cost my father his life!?
S-Sorry... Yeah, so where is this Cardinal guy?

I believe he…



Yeeeearrrghh!!



...
...
...We probably shoulda stopped interrupting him, huh?
<mortified glare>
<rubs neck> Yeah... Probably shoulda done that...





Music: Wind Which Blows From the Dark II




Olga!
It's ARCANE Olga to you, boy!
...Yeah, that sounds dumb as hell. I'm not saying that.
Insolence!

I think it would be best if we finished this here! Lord Bacon will be pleased to be rid of unwanted pests. Well, are you ready?
Hah! What a laugh. When I’m done with you, there’ll be nothing left!
At least you're in the right place to say your prayers!
Bacon is my only Lord. Jesus can eat my rear end.
Yeah, gross. Keep the weird fetish stuff to yourself, grandma.





New Music: Demon's Gig
(This is the major boss battle theme for Europe. You should probably listen to it!)





Arcane Olga is back at it again. If you cannot tell from the fact she now has a bombastic boss battle theme, over the generic battle tunes of her previous bathroom ambush, Olga is now a real match. Her health has jumped up from sub-700 to 3300 HP for starters. She may have also expanded her move list just a pinch from the garden variety spells she was sporting in Prague.



Of Yuri's shiny new array of upgraded Fusions, we're going to stick with Baldo for this battle for a couple of reasons.





The Witch of Prague is still a Dark elemental enemy. So Baldo's Nova does the business to the tune of around 200 HP. So that's always a plus.





Alice is going to use her first turn to cast Holy Edge on Margarete and then we'll have our newly returned spy start the bullet storm. Margarete is honestly going to be our primary damage output during this fight. Her physical combo with the Light element stuffed onto it does upward of 200 HP of damage every turn at zero MP cost. There's a good reason we benched Keith in her favor here.



Meanwhile, Alice is actually going to go on the offensive for a change. Baldo can handle healing for this fight with its Grace ability to top everyone off a good 200 HP if necessary. Alice can output around 150-175 HP of damage every turn at a fraction of the MP cost of Baldo's Nova. That ain't bad. But you'd think God could do a solid and give a blanket buff to holy magic cast from a bible when someone is fighting in a church. But nooooo, you've got to manually call in a favor from the big guy to get that kind of treatment.





Olga has access to her generic Level 2 spells from the prior fight but will rarely use them. The chief concern with this battle is Olga's new ability -- Black Fog. This hits the entire party for 100+ HP of damage (120 for Alice.) If we didn't have those Shell Bracelets equipped on the whole squad, it would also inflict Poison. This isn't normally a concerning status effect on its own. But when everyone is down a hundred health and are bleeding an additional 25+ each turn with another 100 HP about to evaporate the next chance Olga gets (she can potentially just spam Black Fog every turn if her AI is feeling like a particular jerk) the need to deal with that drain is less optimal.





But since we prepared for that, we can just have Yuri cast Grace to fully restore everyone to fighting form every other Black Fog cast and be in pretty good shape. This fight can be a real level check if we hadn't upgraded all of our Fusions or were lacking in decent equipment. I definitely got straight up wiped here my first playthrough of the game and might have had to go do a spot of Blue Castle grinding to get up to snuff for the challenge.



This fight actually went unusually well because Arcane Olga also has a physical attack that may as well be a skipped turn on her part. She just kind of comes up and slaps someone for barely double digit damage. Maybe she'll do it twice if she's feeling saucy. For some reason, she saw it fit to waste time with physical attacks an unusually high number of times for the LP's fight against her. Not that I'm complaining. By all means, keep striking people for pathetic damage, the lady who literally has the word "arcane" in her frikkin' name!





In any case, Arcane Olga once again fails an ambush on our party. I dunno, maybe she should have used that surprise one-shot lightning strike on Yuri or literally anyone else other than the dumpy 60-year-old priest. I'm pretty sure you could have killed that guy by just throwing a rock at him. But what do I know? I'm not a teleporting mystic with a void for a face.


Music: Results






For our troubles, we get the usual influx of Cash and EXP. Olga also drops a companion piece to the Big Jug, the Small Jug! This accessory buffs just about every stat at the cost of 2 SP drain each turn. Honestly, it's pretty much something only Yuri can get any functional use from reliably. But outside of boss battles, it's a pretty solid piece of equipment since hell if most of 'em are going to last enough turns for Sanity drain to be an issue even with half the turns.


Music: Wind Which Blows From the Dark II




Kicked your rear end granny. Maybe now you'll say your prayers.
Nah... Rule of threes, idiot. I still got one fight in me!




Somehow Yuri manages to still be astonished when one of the villains flees the scene by warping away despite it happening almost literally every single time. At least Roger Bacon didn't warp in to Hadoken him in the face and immediately leave with the mid-boss minion like Wugui's treatment.

Alice remembers Father Doyle got struck by lightning and was looking fairly dead like ten minutes ago. She rushes to his side.



Uh… Uh… Alice… The cardinal… is in… London…
Father!!





Unlike all those godless heathens who faded into oblivion upon death, Father Doyle gets the dignity of being raptured to the afterlife as he expires. Well, he technically made it two scenes before dying and was mentioned prior to appearing/dying. That puts him ahead of the pack of quite a few folks in the non-playable character bloodbath that is Shadow Hearts.


Music: But-Dad-Dead-Bed




The party is unceremoniously dumped back into the streets of Rouen. The random battle mobs have vanished and everything is now back to normal. Only Happy Leonard here has any notion that anything has changed like... you know, the local priest getting struck by magic lightning and getting raptured. We could leave town right now to set off for London and the conclusion of this chapter. But one other thing has changed following Arcane Olga's defeat.



A new NPC has appeared in Crime Alley, Hook-nose Robin. You don't get any points for guessing why he's here after major story events.



Is it too dark to see? Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Hmm...
Ehh... not really opinionated on guys' noses. It's OK, I guess.
<becomes Lottery Member No. 06> Hmmmm... You, like, carrying a Lottery Ticket? Perhaps you wish to, like, play?
If it makes you stop talking about your nose to me...
Sure, I'll, like, play.
Once in a while, I, like, know what I want to say and stuff.
Like, whatever. Just, ya know, spin the ring thing.



This is pretty average Lottery Judgment Ring. Nice job formatting the spacing on Alchemist's Water guys...



The grand prize of this lottery session is an Accelerator. This is an accessory that can be worn in conjunction with the Pedometer to double the accumulated steps traveled at the cost of eating the two accessory slots the two items need. Boy... really could have frikkin' used access to this thing back when we were running a 13 mile round trip of Keith's castle stairs...



Well then, that's it for Rouen, France. Without even stopping to discuss the matter, we're off on another several hundred kilometer journey to the city of London as this chapter of Shadow Hearts concludes. Tune in next time for a trek to the British Isles in Chapter 16: Boy From London. I hope you like dealing with orphans!





Another short chapter. But at least it garnered more Library entries than the last couple of 'em.

MONSTER:



Yeah, just blacking out all the textures isn't doing wonders for that low poly model.



What the HELL kind of bet did you take where you had to end up in a three-way with a bat and an eagle!?

NPC:



Shockingly, one of the few characters that have a completely unique model that never gets recycled. Arcane Olga is just Evil Sea Mother who in turn was nice Cat Demon Mayor.




Video: Arcane Olga Boss Battle 2

The Dark Id fucked around with this message at 20:46 on Oct 17, 2018

McDragon
Sep 11, 2007

Nice Jugs :v:

Weeble
Feb 26, 2016
Ever worth it to equip both jugs to get the increased stats with normal SP loss?

CmdrKing
Oct 14, 2012

Maybe if I called it 'Interpretive Stabbing'...

The Dark Id posted:


Bacon is my only Lord. Jesus can eat my rear end.


Y'know what, maybe Olga has things figured out.
... or she's just really into Keto.

Shitenshi
Mar 12, 2013
I like to think that the God of Death took on the form of a hooker or something to lure in poor Camazotz like how he did the Fox Face thing to gently caress with Yuri, and then when the act was done, the bastard revealed what was really going on and laughed his rear end off. Makes me think Yuri wasn't actually going to achieve perma souldeath like what was promised in the graveyard, he was only going to be turned into a low level mook that would get unceremoniously crushed by Alice and Zhuzhen without them realizing it.

Zagglezig
Oct 16, 2012
I wonder if the God of Death is just bored and is the one setting up these weird recipes for monsters like the mailman that eats dogs, the bat that shows up when you burn a dead rat with drugs and feathers, and the knights who don't kill enough stuff. Cause there's a bunch of those mingled in with regular stuff like just plain evil ghosts, monsters, and normal dangerous wildlife.

...I was trying to figure out why the pedometer thing would mention a vague pikachu reference, then I remembered the pikachu pedometers.


The Dark Id posted:

cast Holy Edge on Margarete and then we'll our newly returned spy start the bullet storm

he technically made it two scenes before dying and was mention prior to appearing/dying.

Zagglezig fucked around with this message at 20:49 on Oct 14, 2018

IMJack
Apr 16, 2003

Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.


Fun Shoe
It could be that Father Elliot was an Anglican converted to Catholicism. Anglican priests can marry, and the existing marriages of Anglican-turned-Catholic priests are tolerated.

Or, it could be the writers didn't know or care about that little detail. Either way works.

Ratoslov
Feb 15, 2012

Now prepare yourselves! You're the guests of honor at the Greatest Kung Fu Cannibal BBQ Ever!

Or maybe the unnamed order of Elite Vatican Exorcists has special dispensation from the Pope to marry due to the dangerous nature of their job, much like how German Landscknects had special exemption to sumptuary laws.

Robindaybird
Aug 21, 2007

Neat. Sweet. Petite.

IMJack posted:

It could be that Father Elliot was an Anglican converted to Catholicism. Anglican priests can marry, and the existing marriages of Anglican-turned-Catholic priests are tolerated.

Or, it could be the writers didn't know or care about that little detail. Either way works.

Yeah, that's the usual loophole is a priest from a non-Catholic denomination that allows marriage converting to Catholicism. Shadow Hearts generally does a better job on research than most Anime/Video games on the subject than most (though they'll toss out stuff if it gets in the way of being fun).

Keldulas
Mar 18, 2009
I'm pretty sure Keith can use the jugs just fine due to his SP total. Granted, you said that Keith just gets screwed over by the enemy elements for the most part so eh....

XainZero
Feb 16, 2011

Keith isn't Dark element. He's Earth. Yuri's the Dark element character.

W.T. Fits
Apr 21, 2010

Ready to Poyozo Dance all over your face.

The Dark Id posted:

Getting your head torn off for use in a deity's B-Ball game is a pretty badass way to go out.

Eh, he was fine, he didn't actually die from it. His brother was able to make him a new head from a gourd that he found until they were able to steal his real head back.

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

W.T. Fits posted:

Eh, he was fine, he didn't actually die from it. His brother was able to make him a new head from a gourd that he found until they were able to steal his real head back.

That only makes it better, really.

Geostomp
Oct 22, 2008

Unite: MASH!!
~They've got the bad guys on the run!~

XainZero posted:

Keith isn't Dark element. He's Earth. Yuri's the Dark element character.

Yeah, but Keith has some Dark moves and Yuri might as well not have an element given how often we swap him around into demons.

Geostomp fucked around with this message at 15:33 on Oct 16, 2018

DukeofCA
Aug 18, 2011

I am shocked and appalled.
First time I played I thought for sure Father Doyle was going to end up as a boss fight because of his character portrait. Dude looks like a straight creeper.

Robindaybird
Aug 21, 2007

Neat. Sweet. Petite.

He does look like a poor man's Igor

Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"
He looks like Frankenstein's Monster.

Kavak
Aug 23, 2009


He looks like the ancestor of another unkempt clergyman.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VI-WRb2u4po

Materant
Jul 22, 2010

see, what you don't understand is he now has

THE MANLIEST MUSTACHE

it defies physics


XainZero posted:

Keith isn't Dark element. He's Earth. Yuri's the Dark element character.

It's already been addressed, sorta, but pretty much every Ritual move Keith has is Dark-elemental. Sure he's not Dark himself, but that's mostly semantics when the only things that take advantage of that are getting hit and your basic attack.

Robindaybird
Aug 21, 2007

Neat. Sweet. Petite.

Materant posted:

It's already been addressed, sorta, but pretty much every Ritual move Keith has is Dark-elemental. Sure he's not Dark himself, but that's mostly semantics when the only things that take advantage of that are getting hit and your basic attack.

Makes me think Keith was originally dark-element, but someone reminded them pretty late that Yuri's already dark and the party doesn't have an earth element, and they forgot to switch the rest of his rituals to Earth-element.

Schwartzcough
Aug 12, 2009

Don't tease the Octopus, kids!
Having Dark attacks when he's Earth-aligned seems like a very nice advantage against dark-weak foes (who would likely use light-element attacks), since he can take advantage of a weakness without also being extra weak to the enemy's attacks. Seems like everyone has to do the whole "deal more damage/take more damage" tradeoff.

Dudethunder
Jan 12, 2012
Oh, hey, a Pokemon Walker reference. Nice to see more friendly monsters mentioned.

Arbite
Nov 4, 2009






Does everyone forget he was a bishop?

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.



This guy must go as Frankenstein every Halloween.

Tuxedo Ted
Apr 24, 2007

Arbite posted:

Does everyone forget he was a bishop?

His first name is "Father". Understandably, he goes mostly by his middle name.

Robindaybird
Aug 21, 2007

Neat. Sweet. Petite.

Arbite posted:

Does everyone forget he was a bishop?

Okay, apparently Bishops can get demoted, but I don't think they would demote them postmortem

Materant
Jul 22, 2010

see, what you don't understand is he now has

THE MANLIEST MUSTACHE

it defies physics


Robindaybird posted:

Okay, apparently Bishops can get demoted, but I don't think they would demote them postmortem

Maybe it's the act of invoking God that does it; worship Him all you like but the moment you ask Him to get His rear end off the couch there's going to be consequences.

The Dark Id
Aug 13, 2005

Why
you
know
I
LOVE
THIS SHIT !!!!
[citation needed]


Episode XLVIII: London Rats


Music: Atmosphere - Blow Up




Time for another road trip! It is only around 300 km from Rouen, France to London, England. Give or take depending on where they have to take a boat ride across the English Channel. The gang obviously can't just trek through the Chunnel at this point in history. Probably...



Great Britain gets its own sub-map. We might be hanging out in the general area of the island for a little while... The remainder of the main plot takes place here.



And we're not done zooming in! The city of London gets its own sub-map. Today we'll specifically be heading to Old Castle Street. This is an entirely unremarkable street in London other than the fact that one of Jack the Ripper's murders took place in an alley off this street. That has zero relevance to the plot. Just a fun factoid!


New Music: Vitamin Metropolis
(I would not have pegged early 1900s London with such jaunty tunes.)



At least that Dehuai dingus back in Shanghai lived in a big obvious evil tower with ogres guarding out front and junk. Random mansions don't really stand out.
Well, it is the capital of England. Anyway, doesn’t this place look suspicious?
I dunno. Everything here seems suspicious. Some dude just wandered up to mean and went "top o' the mornin' to ya, governor!" Like... do I look like the governor or something?
That's just an expression, Yuri.
Naw. Suspicious is what it is!
...

But you think he’s really here? This card guy or whatever?
Cardinal Simon.
<nods> Yeah. That’s the one.
<shakes head and shrugs> Enough with the dumb act already!! I know you know who I mean!!



OK. We're free to explore London's Old Castle Street. There is a hotel just to the right of where we begin but Yuri refuses to enter it until we poke around the area for a bit to investigate. So let's chat up the locals and see if we can get anywhere.



Are there birdmen or gremlins running around lately?
What?
Howabout rabid wolves or ghosts?
What on earth are you talking about!?
You said it was dangerous, guy. Wanna know what I gotta punch.
There are no fairy tales here, sir. There are pickpocketing ruffians and muggers stalking the alleys. You'd best be on alert.
So no randomly attacking mummies or bloodsucking bats?
Don't be absurd. Of course not!
Tch... This city is lame...




Oh yeah? Where's it at?
Say, do you want a rare card? I've spent so much money collecting them, I'm broke.
A rare card?
Whatabout that cardinal guy's mansion? Where is it?
Oh... I just heard of it. Haven't the foggiest where it might be.
...Very helpful.
So the card? Do you want it?
Hmmmmmmm...

> I want it, I admit it! > I'm no card freak.



The game doesn't indicate the price until we accept the purchase, but it is a fairly steep 7,000 Cash dropped for this rare card. The card in question is the Sun Card which provides the potential for a 40% Discount and 20% price raise in all stores. I'd say that was worth dropping seven grand. It'll likely pay for itself the next equipment upgrade session. Granted... I now kind of regret upgrading Zhuzhen and Keith back in Prague given they've done nothing but sit on the bench since then. But eh... ain't like we're exactly hurting for cash at the moment.



Behind the corner from the hotel is yet another Lottery Ticket. Sneaky! But good timing, because the last NPC hanging out in this twisty street is...



The only thing t' soothe the human heart is liquor. Liquor, and... Uh...
<becomes Lottery Member No. 05> It's a lottery!
Count me in.
Booze AND the lottery at the same time! It's a revolution!
Hell yeah, son!




There's no noteworthy gimmick with this Lottery spin. It's just an extremely narrow Hit Area for the top prize. I got fairly lucky and got it in the red my second try.



What kinda name is "Ganbriel"? Whatever. This accessory provides a 20% reduction in MP cost for Special Abilities. Yuri could probably benefit pretty well from these given the inflating MP cost with his newer Fusions and his overall lower end total MP stocks.

That's it for this street. Let's continue onward to the next map, where we are immediately met with...



<yanks on kid> Hey! Quieten down, will ya!


The party rushes onto the bridge to help the child.



Who the hell are you?! Shut up and mind yer own business. The law in this town says that all orphans go to the orphanage.
<steps forward> Shut up. Mind yer own business, is it? You and me got a problem, punk.
It's been a few days since I've punched something and your nose is looking MIGHTY punchable right now.
Har!



The Man in Black pushes the orphan boy down and runs off. Well, it's more of a power walk. Regardless, he leaves the scene. Margarete walks up to the fallen boy and helps him up.



Yeowch! I’m okay, ma’am.

That hurts! Ma’am!
You mean “miss”, don’t you?
Wha...?
Ma'am is what you use when talking to an older, refined woman. It's not appropriate for a beautiful flower in its prime.
O...K... ma'am?
Call me ma'am one more time and they will NEVER find your body, little boy...

<stands up> O-okay, m, miss!!
<approaches the pair> What a horrible way to treat a child. Say there, where’s your home, little boy?
My home?

The boy runs to the end of the bridge.



Do you want us to take you there, little boy?
Really? Thank you, miss ma’am.
I don’t appreciate that phrase…
Haha! Now that’s a brave lad there.
<glares at Yuri> Did you say something?
Er, nope…
Well, let’s go, shall we?
<nods>

A slightly older girl runs to the end of the bridge.



What happened? You’re hurt!
<runs up to the girl> I’m okay. But I was almost taken away by this guy in black. These people helped me!
Oh, my! I see. Thank you so much for coming to my brother’s rescue. Come on, Joshua. You need to thank them, too!
<walks up to Margarete> Thanks for everything sir, miss… and er, miss ma’am.



Joshua bows his head and quickly swipes something from Margarete's jacket. Never trust street urchins.



<leans forward> Next time you call me “miss ma’am”… I will kill you.

<glares> I will put a bullet in your limbs for every letter in that phrase and then cast your broken body into the Thames with a rock tied to it.
<whimper>

<stands straight and laughs> Bye-bye now!
She’s scary!


Chris and Joshua run off down the road.



The older sister seems like a nice kid.
And the younger brother seems traumatized. Nice work...
Well they certainly didn’t look at all alike. Anyway, let’s go.





What is it?
My w… wallet?! I was hiding it in my shirt. I’ve lost it!!
Is it true?!
That little punk!!
<pulls out gun> I will END HIM!
<nervous laugh> Let's just calm down now.
...
...Wait, did I give you my money to hold onto too?
Yep!
...
You do what you've got to do.




Sure enough, we're now broke! 0 Cash! For some reason, Margarete was carrying the entire party's war chest in her jacket pocket. That was perhaps not the best idea the team has ever formulated. In any event, we now need to track down those kids. Some little orphan shits aren't stealing 16 hours of JRPG random battle earnings. Let's try talking to folks in the area if they know anything about thieving children.



Oh, I bet you guys got scammed, didn't you. By a couple of London Rats.
Care to elaborate on what that means, guy?
No.
...




They target tourists and bum food from them, or lift their wallets. The bar owner can probably tell you more about them.



OK. We need to hit up a bar to learn more about the pickpocket orphan gang. That seems reasonable. Before we head over there, Yuri can rummage in someone's yard to find a hidden Oak Slingshot. There's no way to inspect that yet. It's almost like it's a weapon for a party member we've yet to obtain or something. We'll just hold onto it for safe keeping.



Now, about that bar...



Yeah. I tried to be nice, and the brats stole my wallet.
Well, my friend's wallet who was holding all of our money. Well, not MY money cuz I was kinda light after six months out of action. Ergh... You don't need to know all this.
Stole your wallet? It must have been the London Rats. I know a little bit about them.



We're now abruptly asked to name a "Heckling Brat" we've yet to actually meet. Meet Halley Brankett, the enigmatic leader of the London Rats who definitely will not be joining our party like literally every other character we've been able to name thus far... Halley's name got completely mangled in the game's localization. It should really be Harry Plunkett. One of the party members in Koudelka was Edward Plunkett. I'm sure that's just a weird coincidence...



I see them all the time, so I figure they must live around here somewhere.
OK. Kick a kid named Halley's rear end, huh? That's a start.
Well, I guess I’ll go back to the inn. The old man should be here by now. I’d better go meet him.

To progress the plot we now need to return to that hotel Yuri refused to enter earlier. But before we do that, let's chat up the bar patrons.



There's a Silent Peddler hanging out at the bar. Does he just point at the bottle he wants when ordering? That seems obnoxious as hell. Well, we certainly haven't accumulated enough steps to get a prize and we're rather short on cash for any purchases. So we'll just skip him. He's got the same stock of junk as Silent Peddler back in Rouen.



You clearly haven’t had your money jacked recently...
If their parents had sent them to school and made them study, they wouldn't have turned bad.
While I ain't sympathetic to thieves... I don't think dead parents of orphans have that luxury.
Not with that attitude. Tsk. Young people these days.




Ever since they took his mom away, he's been looking after kids who've gone through the same thing. No one in the whole town can really hate those kids.
Ehh... I know one lady that might.



There's a cute little Easter Egg on this bar's wall. The poster up on the bar wall is...



...a very low-resolution promotional render from Koudelka. She never actually took her jacket off in-game. But marketing for the game tried to go with attempting to make the protagonist a sexy Lara Croft type. That didn't really translate to anything in the actual game. Or help push more than about twelve copies of the game sales wise.





Before we depart, we can pay back the barkeep for his tip by jumping behind the counter and stealing the first full MP restore item available in the game. It seems like a pain to transport that thing around in a mystical glowing wine glass. But what do I know of arcane alchemical extracts?



Back to the inn we go. We wouldn't want to make the mistake of only using a map render a single time, now would we?

Sometime later...



<marches up to Margarete> And cripes! You had all of MY money too!
<jumps back>
I still dunno why you all felt pooling our money with one person was a good idea...
I let you out of my sight for a minute and this is what happens?! You can’t do this to me!!
I'm getting old! That was my whole savings! What do you want me to go do? Grind monsters for hours of the little remaining time I have left!?
That’s why I’m trying to apologize! Okay?
<laughs> It’s not like we needed the money. I mean, look at us!
I can punch a hole through a dude. Alice can vaporize dudes with her God powers or whatever.
<frown> I'd rather not do that.
Keith can teleport and shoot fireballs out of his cape.
I am not even wearing a cape nor can I do any of what you just mentioned.
And Margarete has a gun! We're pretty much set if we need anything. We could just blast this hotel clerk and stay the night for free if we wanted.
<clerk gives nervous glance>
<looks at Yuri and shakes head> That’s right. You come from the same kind of stock, don’t you?
Your solution to getting robbed is for us to become a band of marauding brigands?
Hey. I'm just offering options, ya know?

I don’t suppose there’s any use crying over spilled milk. But what do you intend to do about it?

Margarete huffs up and marches to the middle of the group.



Do you understand?! If you do, then come on!! Let’s find us some London Rats!!
Okay, I got it. I’m with ya.
I'll punch a kid! Ain't nobody gonna stop me!
That's the spirit, sonny boy!

Um, count me in, too.
I-I would rather NOT punch a child.
Oh, you're gonna be punching a kid Alice. This isn't negotiable. You are gonna slap the taste out of some little boy or girl's mouth by the time we're done.

I wish you all good fortune. I will wait here.
Penniless and tired after days of walking but with nowhere to rest my head because some idiot got robbed by a toddler...
I think I'll stay here, too, and keep Master Zhuzhen company.





Time to hit the town and wreck some orphans. Back across the bridge, there is an abandoned house that seems rather irregular. We could have explored it earlier but Yuri couldn't be bothered to investigate anything yet. But now that we're determined to go gently caress-up the Artful Dodger's day, Yuri can inspect the area more thoroughly. For instance, just to the left of the area is a discard new item.



At least you could put some tinfoil or the like over this gunk to transport it. This is the companion piece to the Mana Extract. It fully restores HP. Nobody will ever use it. What if there's an emergency later and we need that full heal!?



But if you listen really carefully, you can hear some kind of noise...

OK. We need to get into this abandoned building. Yanking the boards off the front door simply won't do. Instead, let's check further into the yard for anything suspicious.



It looks like this shutter can be moved...





Here is a new Judgment Ring challenge. This is basically a button tapping QTE. The more we press the button, the further the indicator climbs. If we stop pressing it, it will slowly begin to fall. We have to have the indicator in the Hit Area within 10 seconds. It is possible to overshoot it, so no being too overzealous with our button mashing.



And there you have it -- the London Rats' secret underground bunker. In we go! I hope Little Orphan Annie is ready to get a German suplex through a table.


New Music: Babysitter is Old Nurse
(I have no idea why the plucky orphans' hideout theme is so sinister.)



It's surprisingly cozy for a street urchin hideaway. Welp. Time to get looting! Just to the left of the ladder entrance is...



I feel like street kids should not be dabbling with demonic jewelry. There is no good end to that tale... This particular item adds 20% physical damage and lowers physical defense by 20%. Meh.



There are decidedly few orphans hanging out in the basement. Perhaps the first floor will yield kids to smack about for our stolen money?





Nope! OK. Maybe they've made the tactical blunder of trapping themselves on the third floor.



Wow! Joshua, that’s awesome!
Yeah! On top of saving my life, they gave me all this money! I’m almost thankful!



<pulls out gun> SURPISE, motherfuckas! Where's my money, you goddamn nerds!?
PISS!


The kids run to the back of the room.



Well now, do you want to give back what you stole?
Or am I going to have to teach one of you little turds the meaning of the word "defenestration"?

Alice and Yuri run up to make sure Margarete doesn't straight murder a child.



I can smell a rat, get it?
<steps forward and puts her hands over her heart> I-I’m so sorry. You see, those kids haven’t eaten in three days…
<shrugs and shakes head> That’s no excuse for stealing someone else’s money, you know!
I've strapped men to a chair with a lit stick of dynamite in their lap for less.
I really am sorry. Here’s the wallet… though we already used some of the money… Please forgive them…



Your wallet is returned. Somehow, it feels lighter than before...

Thankfully there isn't some percentage of your total money removed like some other RPGs I could name when you got cash nicked. It's only 100 Cash. There's literally nothing we could purchase for just 100 bucks at this point in the game. I guess we don't need to break the starving orphans' kneecaps.



I'm sorry.
<walks up to Margarete> This... is a token of my apology.



You got a Crucifix! It's very expensive-looking. Who could this have belonged to?



Joshua forks over one of the best accessories in the game -- the Crucifix. It negates all status abnormalities. This includes both regular Status Effects and Ring Abnormalities. There are only four of these in the game and the rest are a much bigger pain in the rear end to obtain. So getting one for free is quite a nice compensation.



Heh heh! Sorry, we scared you like that. We’re not gonna hurt you.
I mean we totally were gonna. But I think Miss Margarete here has calmed down and I'm not feeling anymore either.
Th-that's good...

Do you all live here together?
Uh-huh. None of us has any parents to take care of us. In this town, whenever they find a homeless child, they take him to the orphanage.
And don’t they take good care of you at the orphanage?
No way! Once they take a kid there, he’s never seen or heard from again!
All the kids at the Orphanage become monsters!
What’s that mean?
Like a delinquent menace to society or...?
It means that there aren’t any good people in this world.

Halley Brankett marches up the stairs.


Music: Rice Field of Light




Halley!!

Who are you?
I’m Halley, leader of the London Rats. I’m like their big brother. Sorry about Joshua, but you should’ve kept your guard up!
<laughs> Hmph! You have some nerve.
I'll just be sure to double-tap the next dirty kid on the street that approaches me.
Ain't that a little extreme, lady?
<glares> No.
You do you.

<steps forward> I’m glad you’re not from the orphanage, though. All the kids taken to the orphanage disappear mysteriously.
<looks around> So that’s why these kids are hiding here?
<nods> That’s right. All the residents of this area keep their mouths shut, too.
Almost everyone in the area immediately told us everything about you.
Err... You must have gained their trust somehow.
We've been in town for all of an hour.
That is... a little concerning...

<starts pacing around the room> Not an easy place to live in. But you know, it was about the same for me when I was your age.
What are you doing here in this dump, anyway?
Hey! This is our home! It's notta dump!
<grits teeth> It's sweet you think that, Sharon.

I’ll help you in return for saving one of our little ones.
We’re looking for someone. Do you know if there’s a mansion around here owned by a person named Cardinal Albert Simon?
Albert Simon?
<steps forward> Halley, I wonder if Old Carl might know something?
<nods> Yeah, sure. He’s an odd one, but he knows a lot about this area. I’m sure he’d help you out if I asked.


Music: Babysitter is Old Nurse




OK. If we ask any of the London Rats, they'll tell us Old Carl lives right next door. Before we leave, we'll just pilfer one more thing from the impoverish youngens.



I don't think I ever mentioned it but Shadow Hearts does have Back Attacks (enemies get initiative and the party's placement in rows is reversed) and Pincer Attacks (enemies are on both sides, gain the initiative and running from battle is disabled.) The reason I've not brought it up is there's been exactly two instances of either in the 181 battles fought thus far and they were both in the middle of a long stretch of throwaway random battles. As such, this accessory that prevents 'em is about as useful as an rear end in a top hat on my elbow.



But it's better in our hands than the orphans' mitts. What do kids living on the street need with a device that prevents stranger danger, anyway?

...

...Hmm. Maybe we shouldn't have stolen that. Oh well! Hindsight and all that. I'm sure it'll be fine!


New Music: Vitamin Metropolis




In any event, right next door to the boarded-up London Rats hovel is Old Carl's house. Let's kick the door open and see if he has any info on Cardinal Simon's whereabouts.



Oh, it’s you, Halley.

Old Knowledgeable Carl walks up to Yuri and inspects him.



Who’s this stranger?
Y-yo...?
They saved Joshua from the orphan hunters. Carl! You know Cardinal Simon? They’re looking for him.
What? You want to know about Cardinal Simon? Hmm… I’ve got it! That mansion is across the Thames River, in the residential area in the north!
Thanks, Old Carl! Let’s go, Yuri!



Thanks, Carl! Don't mind us. We're just going to steal this Lottery Ticket off your shelf. You're old. You don't need it.



That's a wrap for Old Castle Street, London. Tune in next time when the gang tracks down Albert Simon's mansion and maybe meets an evil Fusion Dance hybrid of Goro Majima and Kiryu Kazuma as Shadow Hearts continues!







Alice and Margarete Promotional Art - You distract them with weird bible verses and I'll double tap 'em in the skull. It's the perfect plan!

The Dark Id fucked around with this message at 04:05 on Oct 18, 2018

Adnor
Jan 11, 2013

Justice for Daisy

Oh good you name one of the kids, for a second I was scared they would all die 15 minutes after being introduced.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Getting your money jacked in an RPG is never a fun time.

Adnor posted:

Oh good you name one of the kids, for a second I was scared they would all die 15 minutes after being introduced.
That only saves the one of them, the rest of them are still fair game :v:

GimmickMan
Dec 27, 2011

Just in case you ever doubted that most of the people referenced in item descriptions are made up, the "Ganbriel brothers" are a Gundam-rear end fake name.

...I wasn't the only one who was looking up the references until a few updates ago, right? :negative:

bladededge
Sep 17, 2017

im sorry every one. the throne of heroes ran out of new heroic spirits so the grail had to summon existing ones in swimsuits instead
It would be a Christmas miracle if Id managed to get through an entire LP without child murder once ever coming up. It is, frankly, weird how often that's happened over the years.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
I don't think there was any in FF10- oh, wait, no, that one Fayth... nevermind!

Adnor
Jan 11, 2013

Justice for Daisy

bladededge posted:

It would be a Christmas miracle if Id managed to get through an entire LP without child murder once ever coming up. It is, frankly, weird how often that's happened over the years.

There was already kid murder. Unless we don't count the kid that was a cat magically transformed into a kid.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


That was offscreen. Doesn't count.

Hwurmp
May 20, 2005

How about those kids who turned into cats back in Zhaoyang?

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Junpei
Oct 4, 2015

Although next time, you would be wise to heed the ancient Japanese proverb... phone first!
What is the name of the kind of hat Halley is wearing? You know, the kind that only Intrepid Orphans, Plucky Reporters or cab drivers circa 1920s New York wear?

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