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  • Locked thread
azren
Feb 14, 2011


Tuxedo Ted posted:

That got pretty dark pretty fast.

Yeah, no kidding...

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TooMuchAbstraction
Oct 14, 2012

I spent four years making
Waves of Steel
Hell yes I'm going to turn my avatar into an ad for it.
Fun Shoe

Randalor posted:

I kind of wish "King" or "Royalty" was an actual class in a Dragon Quest game. Instead of spells, you just issue orders to your servants. Instead of weapons, you equip team members and order them to attack instead. If the party wagon that follows you around in various games has infinite storage capacity, let's make a class that really abuses that fact.

Instead of spellpoints, you'd have number of remaining living servants.

John Lee
Mar 2, 2013

A time traveling adventure everyone can enjoy

Randalor posted:

I kind of wish "King" or "Royalty" was an actual class in a Dragon Quest game. Instead of spells, you just issue orders to your servants. Instead of weapons, you equip team members and order them to attack instead. If the party wagon that follows you around in various games has infinite storage capacity, let's make a class that really abuses that fact.

There is a Japanese tabletop game like this! Meikyuu ("Make You") Kingdom. Dungeoneering to build and support a town, and you've gotta have a Royalty class around.

Raiad
Feb 1, 2005

Without the law, there wouldn't be lawyers.


Randalor posted:

I kind of wish "King" or "Royalty" was an actual class in a Dragon Quest game. Instead of spells, you just issue orders to your servants. Instead of weapons, you equip team members and order them to attack instead. If the party wagon that follows you around in various games has infinite storage capacity, let's make a class that really abuses that fact.

I’m on board with this idea except for the equipping team members thing.

You’re an adventurer, go procure your own pointy stick or whatever it is that commoners use.

Camel Pimp
May 17, 2008

This poster survived LPing Lunar: Dragon Song. Let's give her a hand.

Tuxedo Ted posted:

That got pretty dark pretty fast.

I know the draconian censorship rules back then weren't always abided by but i'm still surprised this got in

YggiDee
Sep 12, 2007

WASP CREW

Tuxedo Ted posted:

That got pretty dark pretty fast.

Dragon Quest is a pretty optimistic series as a whole, but there's definitely a streak of something grim under the cutesy anime character designs.

Blaze Dragon
Aug 28, 2013
LOWTAX'S SPINE FUND

Camel Pimp posted:

I know the draconian censorship rules back then weren't always abided by but i'm still surprised this got in

I'm not sure how you'd censor it. Make the note say they just ran away and will never come back, I guess? It'd be the easiest way, I think.

That said the censorship in DQ seems to be strictly religious (House of Healing, sorceror from Shadowtime...), violence and death are completely fine.

IMJack
Apr 16, 2003

Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.


Fun Shoe

Randalor posted:

I kind of wish "King" or "Royalty" was an actual class in a Dragon Quest game. Instead of spells, you just issue orders to your servants. Instead of weapons, you equip team members and order them to attack instead. If the party wagon that follows you around in various games has infinite storage capacity, let's make a class that really abuses that fact.

This sounds like the kind of Trode you'd find in a DQ game.

Trope. I meant trope.

Oh hey, this game actually has event flags! You don't have another old sage who refuses to believe you're the chosen here after you've shown him your proof.

FrankZP
Nov 11, 2015

AIGHT SHITBIRDS, IT'S EXPLOSION TIME!

Tuxedo Ted posted:

That got pretty dark pretty fast.

Yeah, despite the colorful exterior, Dragon Warrior is definitely not a series that shies from tragedy. I mean, we haven't seen anything quite as dark as "interracial couple goes on a suicide pact because the girl's mother is a huge bigot" before (though the Princess of Moonbrooke having to watch her father being murdered by demons is up there), but from this point on, it's a taste of things to come for sure.

loving love Fiona Apple posted:

Also the text and dialogue for the King section in the remake is absolutely amazing and I just have to share it.

Oh dang that is delightful. It's a bit of mood whiplash with the Noaniels storyline right afterwards though, heh.

Randalor posted:

I kind of wish "King" or "Royalty" was an actual class in a Dragon Quest game. Instead of spells, you just issue orders to your servants. Instead of weapons, you equip team members and order them to attack instead. If the party wagon that follows you around in various games has infinite storage capacity, let's make a class that really abuses that fact.

It's not quite that exactly, but there is a Sovereign class in Etrian Odyssey, with most of their skills being orders that buff multiple party members

FrankZP fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Jul 16, 2018

Patter Song
Mar 26, 2010

Hereby it is manifest that during the time men live without a common power to keep them all in awe, they are in that condition which is called war; and such a war as is of every man against every man.
Fun Shoe
Dragon Quest as a series does a really good job of balancing comedy and tragedy. DQ VII's style lends itself to it especially well. When your game is a neverending string of 2-3 hour miniquests, you'll get a ton of room for tragedy.

Flavius Aetass
Mar 30, 2011
Just beat the SNES version of DW3 and man, am I satisfied. I want to try 4 again now but apparently the only available English version is the NES one? I'm down for that but I really enjoyed the graphics and sound of this SNES remake.

Leroy Dennui
Aug 9, 2014

Gina McCarthy made us gay,
but we would not have met
had Biden not dropped his cones
:gaysper::frogbon:

Flavius Aetass posted:

Just beat the SNES version of DW3 and man, am I satisfied. I want to try 4 again now but apparently the only available English version is the NES one? I'm down for that but I really enjoyed the graphics and sound of this SNES remake.

DS and mobile are both official English releases for IV; mobile is actually recommended despite wonky controls (return of party chat and crescendo during battle music, probably other valid reasons but those are most important).

Patter Song
Mar 26, 2010

Hereby it is manifest that during the time men live without a common power to keep them all in awe, they are in that condition which is called war; and such a war as is of every man against every man.
Fun Shoe
Yeah, DS or Mobile are the way to go with IV-VI. V and VI DS restore party chatter, so that's not a loss, either.

DQ IV DS/mobile features a lot of lovely optional bonus content, including a postgame chapter, but it's 100% optional.

DQIV is short and sweet. It's reasonably hard, but not insanely so. It's fun throughout.

Flavius Aetass
Mar 30, 2011
Oh neat. I had trouble making DS work with my Raspberry Pi last time, but I'll try to get it to work for that.

Patter Song
Mar 26, 2010

Hereby it is manifest that during the time men live without a common power to keep them all in awe, they are in that condition which is called war; and such a war as is of every man against every man.
Fun Shoe
One thing that impressed me about DQIII SNES is when it asks you what your real name is. That's something I associate with Earthbound, so I'm automatically going to like a game that is suspicious that "Heroine" is my actual name.

(Hey, I went through FF1 as "Fighter," Heroine is no worse)

DeathChicken
Jul 9, 2012

Nonsense. I have not yet begun to defile myself.

After 8-Bit Theater there was really no other option

Flavius Aetass
Mar 30, 2011

Patter Song posted:

One thing that impressed me about DQIII SNES is when it asks you what your real name is. That's something I associate with Earthbound, so I'm automatically going to like a game that is suspicious that "Heroine" is my actual name.

(Hey, I went through FF1 as "Fighter," Heroine is no worse)

I nearly always use my real name anyway because I'm a narcissist or something, whatever my girlfriend said.

idhrendur
Aug 20, 2016

And now the Elves seem much more like Tolkien elves. Enough that I just researched when the Silmarillion was translated into Japanese. Turns out it was sufficiently early…

chairface
Oct 28, 2007

No matter what you believe, I don't believe in you.

Rebeca's absurd HP is certainly something, although fwiw wizards in general, in all the various versions, seem like they wind up with some random rear end stat being very very good. I had one whose luck gain rivaled a jester's, so one randomly being a hp sack seems fitting.

Kemix
Dec 1, 2013

Because change
Fuckin racist elves. Gotta love that no matter how much times change, Elves are always Chaotic rear end in a top hat.

Veryslightlymad
Jun 3, 2007

I fight with
my brain
and with an
underlying
hatred of the
Erebonian
Noble Faction

chairface posted:

Rebeca's absurd HP is certainly something, although fwiw wizards in general, in all the various versions, seem like they wind up with some random rear end stat being very very good. I had one whose luck gain rivaled a jester's, so one randomly being a hp sack seems fitting.

The counterpoint to this is Zofia, who had the same amount of HP at level 9 that my Hero on the SNES remake had.

...at 19. :negative:

Crystalgate
Dec 26, 2012

idhrendur posted:

And now the Elves seem much more like Tolkien elves. Enough that I just researched when the Silmarillion was translated into Japanese. Turns out it was sufficiently early…
I have read Lord of the Rings, but I do not recall elves being that much of assholes. I haven't read the Hobbit or Simarillion though.

To make a long story short, the Tolkien elves are biologically immortal and superior to humans in practically every physical skill and ability, but reproduce much slower. This changes almost entirely how they need to act and how they perceive things.
Tolkien tried to imagine how such people would behave. Other authors inspired by his work did not put that much thought into their elves. Where Tolkien elves would act differently than humans because they were operating under completely different rules, other elves would act differently just because they were elves.

I can only speculate where the racism and assholeness comes from, but I think I have some idea. If you have a race that act very differently from humans just because, then somewhere back in your head, you have to think that this race considers their ways superior to that of humans. Further, the Tolkien elves were definitely superior to humans in physical abilities and experience, but inferior in adaptability and ability to replenish their numbers. When other authors copy the part where the elves do act superior in certain areas, but not the reasons for it nor the part where they also know they are inferior in other areas, you get a race who just acts like they are superior.

Anyway, I hope I just went of a tangent now and didn't now hijack this thread. I guess we'll see.

NewMars
Mar 10, 2013
It's also worth noting that tolkien elves hosed up everything both for themselves and also for everyone else and are well aware of it.

FrankZP
Nov 11, 2015

AIGHT SHITBIRDS, IT'S EXPLOSION TIME!


: I figured being a hero would feel at least a little better than this.
: Zofia, the portions of this quest that ended in sorrow took place long before any of us had anything to do with it.
: Besides, the elves had it coming, to be honest.
: That's not as comforting as you think.
: Sometimes, all of the endings are bad. But what's up to us is making sure there will be another story tomorrow.



The sun rises just as we get within sight of Noaniels. What a night that was.



: Alright then, let's see about this powder.
: If it turns out this is just flour, we're going back there and torching the place.









Just like that, the man at the entrance starts moving!


: Haha, it worked!
: Whew, okay then, we definitely didn't screw that one up.




: Um...
: Yeah, we did.
: Really? I'm embarrassed.
: Eh, it's nothing. We're used to sleeping close to Isabel, so...
: What's that supposed to mean?
: Oof.
: Yikes!
: There's no way no one ever told you.
: ...oh dear.



One more gold per person than in Kanave, still no biggie. We might as well rest right away.


: ...
: Goodness, it must have happened while you were already...


: There's no such thing as a son of Ortega.
: Oh! I thought you were someone else.
: Look, I'm his daughter. What's your deal?
: I thought it was only yesterday that Ortega was in the room next door. He must have headed to Assaram in search of a key. But... it is hard to believe so many years have passed since then and that Ortega is gone.
: ...yeah, it is. Even if you haven't been asleep all this time.



: He must have been looking for a key to Portoga for sure!
: Well, let's hope there's still a copy of it in Assaram, because if he took the only one, we definitely won't get to use that tunnel.


: It's a good thing the elves' enchanted sleep kept them nourished.
: Well, the elves may be jerks, but they're not demons.




: Right, we just heard of that town. Do you have any idea where it is?
: Assaram is east of Romaly!
: That's... not the best news.
: Well, thank you.

I think we have our next objective! Let's hope the Tower of Shanpane and this ordeal with the elves will have prepared us adequately.





The Spider's Web is a consumable item that basically casts Slow. We can have Rebeca cast Slow anytime we need, so it's no use to us, but it's nice of the game to make a debuff effect available to every class in this way.

The Wizard's Wand is a +15 weapon (one more point of attack power than a Magic Knife) that can be equipped by Wizards and Sages. If you use it in battle, it basically casts Blaze. It's a halfway decent buy if you somehow missed the Poison Needle or have more than one Wizard, but Sages can wield Actual Weapons instead.

The Cloak of Evasion offers a +20 defense bonus (as much as Chain Mail), and it can be equipped by all classes! Its claim to fame is that it allows its user to avoid any standard attack 20% of the time. It would be an upgrade for both Isabel and Rebeca, and in fact it's better than Alvaro's Fighting Suit even though it has 3 less defense... but man is it expensive. We can't even afford one right now.


: Oh! Hey! You're welcome!
: Finally some gratitude.


: Can't remember what you were doing, little boy? Were you going somewhere?
: That's right. I was on my way to visit Grandpa.


: Just take care of the people you love. It'll be enough.
: That's right! Don't worry about it!


: A little money would have been nice though.
: Rebeca...
: Just saying!



So, we've been pretty clearly pointed to Assaram, east of Romaly. That said, we didn't finish exploring the cave where we found the Dream Ruby, and there are portions of this northern region we haven't even seen yet, so let's get to wrapping that up right quick. It'll even get us enough money for a Cloak of Evasion before we set off on our journey.







Ah, Acorns of Life! These increase a character's maximum HP by 1 to 5. They're pretty much unambiguously good, so we let Isabel have them, since she's 9 points behind Rebeca, which doesn't make any sense.



Welp, she's condemned to roll poorly on HP, I guess.





Strength Seeds being any good depends on the same circumstances as Agility Seeds. We'll be vaulting that one for Reasons.





...okay, sure.







And we're done here. Rebeca takes us outside, and we spend some time wandering around until nightfall.



Unsurprisingly, the villagers of Noaniels are in no hurry to go to bed. Everyone is doing whatever they were doing during the day, and even the store is open. We do take this opportunity to buy Rebeca a Cloak of Evasion, seeing as she's still wearing Wayfarer's Clothes; it takes her defense from 16 to 28. It could be argued that she needs it the least, but all it takes is a strong enemy who ignores formation to take a hefty chunk of out her (admittedly considerable) HP pool.

The next morning, we set off to complete our map of the area. There's a small path west of Kanave we haven't seen yet, as well as another region roughly east of Noaniels.



Welp, there's not much in the west.



Oooh, that's ice terrain in the east. There's nothing too remarkable about it, and it's passable on foot.







Hmm, there are some shoals at the mouth of the river we followed from Romaly a while back. If we ever got a ship, we'd have to find another way.







And that's the entire region covered. Man but there was a lot to do here! We're about done though, and we have a new destination, so we head back to Romaly. Alvaro levels to 13 on the way, for 4 Str, 6 Agi, 3 Vit, 4 Luc, 1 Int, and 6 HP. Dang but that's another great level right there.



Hmm, the tickets are now 120 gold instead of 80. I suspect this scales in proportion with the Hero's level.



There are even monsters we haven't seen yet! Let's drop some coin on... the Wild Ape.

:siren:Video: Coliseum (second battle):siren:

Yikes, the Ape gets taken out second, and the Toadstool comes out on top.

: ...huh.
: Well, that's 1380 gold we're not making.
: Gambling is stupid.
: Indeed!

We stay at the inn, save with the king, and depart in the morning.

: Let's see a bunch of dumb cats stop us this time!
: By the way, you never told me where you found my... uh... my replacement. Who was it again?
: Um...
: The less is said about that, the better, I think.
: Yeaaaaah.
: Huh. Okay then.











Despite that one Wild Ape's poor performance in the arena, they're actually quite dangerous, with the ability to roll crits and to call for other Apes to join in. They have only 10 less attack power than Kandar, and they're slightly less durable than his Henchmen. They're highly resistant to ice and slightly to Sleep, but other elements work well.

Zofia levels up a few fights later, for 2 Str, 1 Agi, 4 Vit, 3 Luc, 10 HP, and a new Hero-only spell: Ironize. For 6 MP, it turns everyone in your party into solid iron for a few rounds, making them impervious to all damage and magic, but unable to take any action. This seems pointless at first, but it has a few niche uses. First off, if you encounter new enemies, it gives you a chance to see what they're capable of without putting yourself in any danger. It can also be used to skip a fews turns and increase your odds of successfully running away. And finally, since monsters actually need MP to cast spells for the first time in the series, you can cast Ironize to get them to waste their juice while you're invincible. (That last one only really works on enemies who don't have enough MP to cast their big ticket spells several times, but those are certainly out there.)













: Ugh, even the wind is hot.
: I... I feel like I want to punch the sun!
: I suddenly miss the Noaniels weather for some reason.
: Ha, you homebodies still don't know what real heat is like. Enjoy this while you can.
: I hope you're kidding... but I can tell you're not.


: Is it, now?
: Oh, yes it is. When I was young, I-
: ...!
: Hohoho, never mind. I probably said too much!
: Wow, okay.


: Haha, Assaram!
: Yikes. I thought I heard wrong, that it was because I only heard it in the northern accent, but... nope. Assaram.
: Assaram indeed.

: ...Assaram?
: Good grief. What happened to the likes of "Brecconary" and "Hauksness"?
: Assaram. Assaram. Assaram.
: Assaram!
: Gah, if I hear it said even one more time, it's like the word won't even mean anything anymore!
: Better keep saying it, then!
: rear end!
: Sa!
: Ram!
: ...I need a drink.

That's right. We're in Assaram. Enjoy the rest of your day, everyone.



The inn's seven gold per person, quite reasonable.





Oof, recent history has not been kind to that name.




: I think the old man that lives there knows about the Magic Key.
: Ah, we've got a trail to follow then. Thanks.



: ...!
: What's with... oh!
: Oh my.
: ...
: Alvaro?
: I think his brain shut down.
: That certainly is a lot of money for not a lot of swimsuit.

The one new piece of kit here is the ludicrously expensive Revealing Swimsuit. It only has a defense power of 1, and it has no class restrictions, but only women can wear it. Its only "use" is that it changes the wearer's sprite, in a way that I'm sure you can imagine. I don't know if we'll ever have that much money all at once, and it's doubtful any of our lady companions would even accept to wear it, but who knows what the fullness of time may bring?

: Pfft, in your dreams maybe.
: Not even!



Hmm, the item store is unusually sparse. Maybe they have supply problems. We do pick up a couple Full Moon Herbs, just in case.








: Uh... sure.



No prices? Hmm!

: How about that Iron Helmet?

: ...what?
: That's insane!
: Never take a first offer in Assaram, sweetheart.
: Yeah, no. Pass.
: I see you're good at bartering. You've bested me. Okay, let's make it 8000 pieces of gold. Is that more to your liking? Will you take it?
: If you pay eight grand for that metal bowl, I'm leaving and you'll never see me again.
: Of course not, that's still demented.
: If I go any lower I'll lose money! But again, you're a friend...
: But we've just met!
: OK, let's make it 4000 pieces of gold. Is that more to your liking? Will you take it?
: It still doesn't make any sense, sorry.
: Show some mercy! Do you want me to go broke?
: I kind of wouldn't mind, to be honest.
: Well, all right. OK, let's make it 2000 pieces of gold. Is that more to your liking? Will you take it?
: ...I actually only have a thousand on me right now.
: Oh, I see. Too bad. Come back again.

You need to refuse this merchant's offer three times before you get his best price, and it can still be higher than what you'd pay elsewhere for the same item. For example, the lowest he'll go for a Cloak of Evasion is 5800!

The Iron Helmet is his only item that you can't buy anywhere else. It can be worn by Heroes, Soldiers, Pilgrims and Sages, and it offers 16 defense, a considerable upgrade over the +2 Leather Helmets they're probably wearing at this point. The 2000 he charges is actually reasonable for that much defense.

The Battle Axe boasts 40 attack power, and it can be equipped by Heroes, Soldiers, Merchants and Fighters (though the latter are penalized as usual). Absolutely do not buy it here for 5000 gold, though.

The Giant Shears have +48 attack power, and only Soldiers can use them. The 7400 price here is a massive overcharge, of course.

The Staff of Force offers a truly massive +55 attack power, and it can be used by Wizards, Pilgrims and Sages, but it drains 3 MP per attack so it's a bit of an iffy proposition. You can also do better than this guy's 5000 gold asking price, so if we ever want one, we won't get it here.




: Yeah... I got a notion.


: It'll be a great deal less toasty for sure.





Ah, that's where the rest of the consumables are for sale. But we're not putting up with this guy's bullshit, we can just Return somewhere else if we want any of that stuff.




: Please don't interrupt rehearsals. OK, 1 and 2 and...



: Yikes. One of them needs a lot of practice.









This town is clearly going to be a lot more lively later. Let's get some fighting done until sunset.



Vampire Cats are still not trivial, but it's almost scary to contemplate how much stronger we are than when we first encountered them. This particular fight gets Isabel to level 14, for 2 Str, 2 Agi, 4 Luc, 3 Int, 6 MP, and a new spell: StopSpell. It costs 3 MP this time around, but it works the same as always, rolling against one group's StopSpell resistance to try to permanently block their spellcasting. I was hoping we'd get it soon ever since we ran into those IceBolt-tossing Vampires.



I wonder what's going on with this cave. Let's just have a peek.



Ah, it looks like it could be a tunnel to another area.











: Heyo, mister.

: Norud? More like yes rude!
: Bah, fine, see if we care.
: I'll never understand how one can be so unwelcoming to travelers.
: Eh, maybe it's because they keep taking everything that's not nailed down. Speaking of which...





: ...whoa! What are you doing?
: His name's not written on it. And even if it was, he had it coming. Don't you say he didn't!
: ...
: Welp.

We return outside and resume killing time and monsters until nightfall. Rebeca reaches level 14, for 1 Str, 1 Agi, 4 Vit, 4 Luc, 2 Int, 6 HP, 5 MP, and two new spells: Return and Firebane. This is the earliest a Wizard can learn either of those spells, so Rebeca's Intelligence is definitely on point. Firebane is an upgrade to Firebal, dealing 30-41 fire damage to a group of foes for 6 MP.



: Ah, blessed sunset, at last!




: ...sssssure?
: I don't know if-




The dancer waits for us at the entrance to a nearby building.

: This seems rather shady.
: Meh, live a little. What's the worst that could happen?
: You probably don't want to know the answer to that question, Rebeca.



: I... uh...
: Zofia, I'm sure there's plenty this town has to offer that doesn't involve us not being able to protect you.
: Come on, she's stronger than any one of us.
: It's up to you, sweetheart.
: Yeah, okay, I'm going. Just stay close, alright?
: Got it!



Just like that, we're separated from the rest of our party.



: Whoa, err. That's not a type of fortune-telling I'm familiar with. What with the... the bed and all.

: Sure, yeah, sitting, I can sit. I'm pretty good at sitting!

: Um... maybe... how about nnnnnno-

: Augh!



Holy crap, Zofia's getting in-game dialog.



: ...eh?

: I... what?
: Ha, ha! I couldn't resist!



The father in question runs off to the west, presumably through a secret door.


: My shoulder? Wh... what the... What?













And just like that, we return to our party. I have no idea how the Japanese version handles this scene, but I suspect it's very different and that the localization didn't quite handle it as gracefully as it maybe should have. That thing with the stiff shoulder... Were we supposed to get a massage? And we expected a massage from a lady but then the lights go out and they pull a switcheroo?

Welp. What happens in Assaram stays in Assaram. Let's carry on, shall we?



It's neat to see the game tell us what the new consumables do when it's not so obvious.





Ah, this shop is closed during the day. It's all stuff we've seen, but you definitely want to buy your Battle Axes here, not at that other rip-off artist's place. It's too bad the item shops aren't open at this hour, or I'd sell Zofia's Broad Sword and trade up.













: This beat is something else!

: Oh! Err, gosh...
: Haha, it's all coming back to me!
: Wooo, Isabel!


: Not any more, you're not!


: It's already happening!

: Like... this?
: The boy's got some moves when he feels like it!

...



: Whew!
: Oh my.
: Good grief, that takes me back.
: I love you guys.







: Alright, wanna turn in for the night?
: No. But we have work to do tomorrow, don't we?
: Man, screw the archfiend. Screw his face! If it wasn't for that rear end in a top hat we could just... go on a vacation or something. Everyone could go on vacations without having half their face ate off by a god-damned Vampire Cat.
: That'll be the dream, eh?
: Fia, tell me we'll make it happen.
: We'll make it happen.
: We'll all make it happen together.

Added Space
Jul 13, 2012

Free Markets
Free People

Curse you Hayard-Gunnes!
In the original that lady was offering you a "Puff-puff massage". This was a running joke that was also localized out of the first two games, but is a lot more obvious in this one. A little in-joke based on the Dragon Warrior team starting their careers making porn games.

Shitenshi
Mar 12, 2013
In the GBC remake localization, the dialogue was a lot more clear that you were getting a massage. Your party members would rip on you for getting a massage from some random girl, and the joke was that nope, her dad was the one giving it to you all along.

Hirayuki
Mar 28, 2010


As skeevy as the Revealing Swimsuit is (and I know it's another running series gag/item), I do appreciate that it has such negligible defense. How often in RPGs do women fighters wear skimpy and ridiculously ineffective clothing and call it armor? No way does that handful of strategically placed belts confer 25 points of defense.

And a cute thing about the original puff-puff massage is that the daughter wasn't mad at her dad, but rather pleased because he did such a good job. "That's my dad--he's great at puff-puff. And now your shoulders aren't all stiff. Come again!"

idhrendur
Aug 20, 2016

Crystalgate posted:

I have read Lord of the Rings, but I do not recall elves being that much of assholes. I haven't read the Hobbit or Simarillion though.

To make a long story short, the Tolkien elves are biologically immortal and superior to humans in practically every physical skill and ability, but reproduce much slower. This changes almost entirely how they need to act and how they perceive things.
Tolkien tried to imagine how such people would behave. Other authors inspired by his work did not put that much thought into their elves. Where Tolkien elves would act differently than humans because they were operating under completely different rules, other elves would act differently just because they were elves.

I can only speculate where the racism and assholeness comes from, but I think I have some idea. If you have a race that act very differently from humans just because, then somewhere back in your head, you have to think that this race considers their ways superior to that of humans. Further, the Tolkien elves were definitely superior to humans in physical abilities and experience, but inferior in adaptability and ability to replenish their numbers. When other authors copy the part where the elves do act superior in certain areas, but not the reasons for it nor the part where they also know they are inferior in other areas, you get a race who just acts like they are superior.

Anyway, I hope I just went of a tangent now and didn't now hijack this thread. I guess we'll see.

At the risk of a complete hijack, I actually want to comment on this a little more. There's actually a story in the Silmarillion that involves an elf wanting to marry a human, a parent who refuses, and the importance of a jewel getting returned. Though the parent had a reason beyond his quite real racism: Tolkien elves stay with the world to the end. Even if they die, they eventually reincarnate. But in marrying a human, the elf would then have the human fate, dying and passing out of the world, meaning they would be sundered from all other elves.

If you want to actually read the tale (I highly recommend it, it's probably the greatest of Tolkien's tales, and directly influences the events in LOTR), check out chapter 19 of the Silmarillion, 'Of Beren and Luthien'.

Oh, and regarding the actual update, that town is hilarious.

Sloober
Apr 1, 2011
an important and comical note is that Goof-offs can actually equip battle-axes too

TooMuchAbstraction
Oct 14, 2012

I spent four years making
Waves of Steel
Hell yes I'm going to turn my avatar into an ad for it.
Fun Shoe
I could actually kind of see an argument for a class that could equip all the most powerful gear, at the cost of not being reliable in combat. Sort of like if the character were permanently stuck with a cursed item.

frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

FrankZP posted:

Unsurprisingly, the villagers of Noaniels are in no hurry to go to bed. Everyone is doing whatever they were doing during the day, and even the store is open.
That's such a neat little detail I didn't even pick up on playing myself.

MightyPretenders
Feb 21, 2014

Supposedly, the battleaxe is the strongest weapon available for most classes before Kandar. Technically.

...That guide was far less practical than it pretended to be.

Sloober
Apr 1, 2011

TooMuchAbstraction posted:

I could actually kind of see an argument for a class that could equip all the most powerful gear, at the cost of not being reliable in combat. Sort of like if the character were permanently stuck with a cursed item.

so much of your physical damage is stat based and the goof off has trash stats

besides he's got a better strength

RickVoid
Oct 21, 2010
Wow they did an awful job of censoring Puff-Puff. It does make the main character's reaction of "What the gently caress just happened?" more genuine though.

The remake has a number of different town names, from Kazave (Kanave), Ashalam (Assaram), and I think a few others.

On the topic of Isis, one of my girls goes to school with an Isis. When my daughter introduced us, she informed me that she did not like her name, "because of the bad people they talk about on TV". So I asked her if she knew she was named after a beautiful Egyptian Kitty Goddess. She was not. :allears:

Still beating my head against the SNES version. Close to the end now though, got a few towns and dungeons left.

fucking love Fiona Apple
Jun 19, 2013

samus comfy so what

I'm also almost done with the mobile version, and the mobile version also has some town name differances to the Game Boy version. Assaram is just Asham, Romaly is Romaria, Kanave is Khoryv, Noaniels is Norvik and there are many more name changes to come. So more different then others.

Also there is no revealing swimsuit, and you can buy iron helmets from the other merchant in Asham.

Also the mobile version has no censorship for the "massage." It's just staight up puff puff. And your character enjoys it.

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.


Grimey Drawer

TooMuchAbstraction posted:

I could actually kind of see an argument for a class that could equip all the most powerful gear, at the cost of not being reliable in combat. Sort of like if the character were permanently stuck with a cursed item.

Augh, Beyond the Beyond had you stuck with a useless cursed character for most of the game and it suuuuucked.

e: the game itself was also pretty bad in general though

Zanzibar Ham fucked around with this message at 23:01 on Jul 17, 2018

FisheyStix
Jul 2, 2008

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.
If I recall, the "I have no tomatoes today!" lady from the first Dragon Quest was the first bit of puff puff censorship. It was just a little better masked, imo

Krumbsthumbs
Oct 23, 2010

2nd Place.
1st Loser.
So that area to the right of Kanave? If you're up against the river in a few spots, I think you can fight against enemies from much, much later in the game. I wouldn't suggest trying to level there, some of the enemies can shred even a fully armored Soldier or Hero in a few hits.

Some of the nicer things the remakes of this game included were more helms in the early game, and being able to buy iron helms outside of that damned Bazaar. Not getting ripped off for some solid helmets and also not working through the menus each time was very nice.

Rigged Death Trap
Feb 13, 2012

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

Now that weve seen assaram
Where Arreikum

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AriadneThread
Feb 17, 2011

The Devil sounds like smoke and honey. We cannot move. It is too beautiful.


loving love Fiona Apple posted:


Also there is no revealing swimsuit, and you can buy iron helmets from the other merchant in Asham.


it could be like the other remakes where they just moved it to a different location

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