Twenty Player Shit-Talking Candy Land 2: This Time, It's Persimmonal

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > The Game Room > Twenty Player Shit-Talking Candy Land 2: This Time, It's Persimmonal

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Dog Kisser: Mar 30, 2005; But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.

So, in conclusion Team Bubblegum is the best, which is what I've been saying all along.

# ? Jul 26, 2018 13:41

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 10:57

birdstrike: Oct 30, 2008; i;m gay

Dog Kisser posted:

So, in conclusion Team Bubblegum is the best, which is what I've been saying all along.

best at being clowns

at the circus

# ? Jul 26, 2018 13:44

Dog Kisser: Mar 30, 2005; But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.

Birdstrike posted:

best at being clowns

at the circus

More relevantly, best at winning. Which we did. And, oh, did I personally beat you to the end? Oh! I did! Look at that.

edit: you're the clown

# ? Jul 26, 2018 13:47

birdstrike: Oct 30, 2008; i;m gay

Dog Kisser posted:

More relevantly, best at winning. Which we did. And, oh, did I personally beat you to the end? Oh! I did! Look at that.

edit: you're the clown

imagine taking the time to go back and actually edit your post in this, the comedy boardgame thread, and that being the best you can come up with

I can�t, that level of succ is inconceivable to me and foo�s ma

# ? Jul 26, 2018 13:57

Dog Kisser: Mar 30, 2005; But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.

Birdstrike posted:

imagine taking the time to go back and actually edit your post in this, the comedy boardgame thread, and that being the best you can come up with

I can’t, that level of succ is inconceivable to me and foo’s ma

Oh yeah, well

# ? Jul 26, 2018 14:17

Dancer: May 23, 2011

It's OK team chocolate, I may have been betrayed by the cards yet again, but by the looks of it I will carry us into 2nd place.

As long as we beat those loving gummies I'm happy.

# ? Jul 26, 2018 14:45

CirclMastr: Jul 4, 2010

Once Dancer crosses the finish line, I will motion for Team Chocolate to be named the actual winners since, as we all know, gum isn't even candy.

# ? Jul 26, 2018 16:36

WereGoat: Apr 28, 2017

I suspect Russian interference with this card draw. Bubblegum's victory is FAKE NEWS

# ? Jul 26, 2018 17:05

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

there was only one lol and that was lol-22,

# ? Jul 26, 2018 17:42

Emmideer: Oct 20, 2011; Lovely night, no?; Grimey Drawer

It's still cool, y'know. Mint has really won the moral victory today, by being the best candy.

# ? Jul 26, 2018 17:51

WereGoat: Apr 28, 2017

hexwren posted:

WereGoat and Birdstrike complete the game (^T4/₂₀)

Teamwork!

# ? Jul 26, 2018 18:01

Monathin: Sep 1, 2011; ?????????
?

I had a good hearty chuckle at being stuck in the loving gumdrops AGAIN, immediately.

Ah well, I crossed the finish line, that's what matters.

# ? Jul 26, 2018 19:05

Moatillata: Dec 13, 2006; Maintain.

WereGoat posted:

Teamwork!

Moatillata completes the game (3/20)
WereGoat and Birdstrike complete the game (T4/20)

Ramos posted:

# ? Jul 26, 2018 20:14

Moatillata: Dec 13, 2006; Maintain.

Holding hands bc we are real men and winners and don't give a gently caress who knows

Also we are exchanging long chain amino acids

# ? Jul 26, 2018 20:15

birdstrike: Oct 30, 2008; i;m gay

Moatillata posted:

Moatillata�completes the game (3/20)
WereGoat and Birdstrike complete the game (T4/20)

WereGoat posted:

Teamwork!

# ? Jul 26, 2018 21:42

birdstrike: Oct 30, 2008; i;m gay

Moatillata posted:

Holding hands bc we are real men and winners and don't give a gently caress who knows

Also we are exchanging long chain amino acids

if you can think of a simpler way, I�d like to hear it

# ? Jul 26, 2018 21:44

Lux Anima: Apr 17, 2016; Dinosaur Gum

TEAM BUBBLEGUM CHEWS 'EM UP AND SPITS 'EM OUT!

:vd:

# ? Jul 27, 2018 05:56

Lux Anima: Apr 17, 2016; Dinosaur Gum

Also:

That gum you like is going to come back in style

# ? Jul 27, 2018 06:05

Mistaken Frisbee: Jul 19, 2007

Dog Kisser posted:

So, in conclusion Team Bubblegum is the best, which is what I've been saying all along.

This is factual.

Also, woo! All my hard work of signing up for Team Bubblegum paid off!!! Anyone not on Team Bubblegum just didn't work as hard to get on this team.

# ? Jul 28, 2018 03:46

AnonymousNarcotics: Aug 6, 2012; we will go far into the sea
you will take me
onto your back
never look back
never look back

Who wants to join me in a real life Candyland?

# ? Jul 28, 2018 06:04

Ramos: Jul 3, 2012

Man, I come after a few days and I'm apparently in dead last? What the poo poo?

# ? Jul 29, 2018 06:49

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

Hello, again.

Turns 67-86

Turn 67

Yes's Close to the Edge on the turntable.

Turn 68

Turn 69

Jon Joe has not moved for two turns, drawing characters they've already visited

AnonymousNarcotics has completed the game (¹⁵/₂₀)

Turn 70

Jon Joe draws Princess Lolly and moves ahead to the Lollipop Woods
Dancer gets lost in the Lollipop Woods

Turn 71

Dancer escapes the woods

Turn 72

AJ_Impy falls back to the Peanut Brittle House

Turn 73

Ursine Catastrophe draws Plumpy, but does not move

Turn 75

Turn 78

Ramos has not moved for the last two turns, drawing characters they've already visited

Turn 80

AJ_Impy and Ramos both get stuck in the swamp

Dancer has completed the game (¹⁶/₂₀)
Team Chocolate has completed the game (²/₅)

Turn 81

Traffic's John Barleycorn Must Die on the turntable

No players move this turn

code:

Ramos - stuck in swamp - yellow
Ursine - 2 from end - green
AJ - stuck in swamp - yellow
Jon Joe - 3 from end - double yellow

Turn 82

Ramos fills their dance card and escapes the swamp by falling back to the Ice Cream Sea,

Turn 83

AJ_Impy escapes the swamp

Jon Joe has completed the game (¹⁷/₂₀)

Turn 84

Each remaining team now has one remaining player. Anyone who imagines I'm rigging this game for one reason or another should note that if I was doing so, we'd have been down to one player from each team when all five teams were still on the board.

Turn 85

Ursine Catastrophe has completed the game (¹⁸/₂₀)
Team Lollipop has completed the game (³/₅)

Turn 86

AJ_Impy has completed the game (¹⁹/₂₀)
Team Mint has completed the game (⁴/₅)

FINAL RANKINGS:

and...

Ramos posted:

Man, I come after a few days and I'm apparently in dead last? What the poo poo?

Twenty Player poo poo-Talking Candy Land 2 Starred:

Team Bubblegum

Team Chocolate

Team Lollipop

Team Mint

Team Gummy

and Rosemary and Meyer.

Thank you for playing.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 07:48

Dog Kisser: Mar 30, 2005; But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.

Only me and Moatillata drew no character cards.

I came before them, though, so they're scum.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 07:56

Podima: Nov 4, 2009; by Fluffdaddy

Thanks for running this!

# ? Jul 29, 2018 08:08

birdstrike: Oct 30, 2008; i;m gay

it was a loving privilege to be a part of team gummy, stellar job earning all those jokers that�s what commitment looks like.

WereGoat poo poo-talking MVP, the absolute boy nobody puts down those other losers better

# ? Jul 29, 2018 09:27

Monathin: Sep 1, 2011; ?????????
?

Silver medal behind them bastard Bubblegums? I'll take it.

We'll get our revenge next year, blowhards! :argh:

# ? Jul 29, 2018 09:41

AJ_Impy: Jun 17, 2007; SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?; Yam Slacker

Team mint, fresh and clean to the end. Esteemed minted ones, it's been an honour.

Plus a tip of the hat to our gracious host and comp�re.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 11:36

Ramos: Jul 3, 2012

Came dead last in Candy Land. Forever shamed, no one will ever take me seriously on the competitive Candy Land scene again.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 15:11

WereGoat: Apr 28, 2017

Team gummy wos ROBBED.

Thanks hexwren for running, this was fun.

Team gummy rocks, woop woop!

Ramos, last on the board but first in our hearts!
Birdstrike, absolute BEAST of a poster!
Moatillata, who's every message was filled with POWER and GRACE.

And to the other teams, you all suuuuck

Nah you're all great, it's been fantabulous

All the challenges were rad, your all cool people.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 15:30

CirclMastr: Jul 4, 2010

Man, if I had a table and no searing migraines, I'd be tempted to run Casual Monopoly again.

Thanks for running!

# ? Jul 29, 2018 15:50

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

BLESSED SUCC DOES NOT LOSE

thanks for running this game

# ? Jul 29, 2018 16:00

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

I have a couple more ideas about what the next game might be, but the one I'm leaning towards (as it looks the most fun/funny) also looks like it'll take way, way too long and be stupidly complex to run, especially if I implement the changes I'm thinking of to make it reasonable for 20+ people to play. The other one would have even less sensical piece movement (to the point where every single move would require multiple telestrator arrows)

I dunno. I'll kick it around some more.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 20:29

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

twenty-player poo poo-talking fireball mountain

# ? Jul 29, 2018 20:34

Dog Kisser: Mar 30, 2005; But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.

hexwren posted:

I have a couple more ideas about what the next game might be, but the one I'm leaning towards (as it looks the most fun/funny) also looks like it'll take way, way too long and be stupidly complex to run, especially if I implement the changes I'm thinking of to make it reasonable for 20+ people to play. The other one would have even less sensical piece movement (to the point where every single move would require multiple telestrator arrows)

I dunno. I'll kick it around some more.

Do 20 player Monopoly!

# ? Jul 29, 2018 20:39

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

Dog Kisser posted:

Do 20 player Monopoly!

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3785814

CirclMastr did that after the last run of Candy Land

I did not win

# ? Jul 29, 2018 20:45

Lux Anima: Apr 17, 2016; Dinosaur Gum

I have now upgraded my SA Donation Tag / Popsicle Stick from 'Hell Gem' to 'Dinosaur Gum,' as is proper.

# ? Jul 29, 2018 21:00

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

Captain Foo posted:

twenty-player poo poo-talking fireball mountain

honestly tempting - I didn't get a chance to kickstart it, though, I'm going to have to wait for it to hit retail

# ? Jul 29, 2018 21:02

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

hexwren posted:

honestly tempting - I didn't get a chance to kickstart it, though, I'm going to have to wait for it to hit retail

i figured you had the original, heh

# ? Jul 29, 2018 21:07

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

I did not. I really goddamn wanted it as a kid, and then by the time I got around to being able to throw around unreasonable amounts of money on board games, I still couldn't justify the secondary market prices

# ? Jul 29, 2018 21:10

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 10:57

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

oh in other news

what the gently caress

Prince of Space posted:

Me with my game face on:

Prince of Space posted:

TEAM BUBBLEGUM CHEWS 'EM UP AND SPITS 'EM OUT!

# ? Jul 29, 2018 21:48

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > The Game Room > Twenty Player Shit-Talking Candy Land 2: This Time, It's Persimmonal

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