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Rex-Goliath
Nov 12, 2016



yeah they're going full brain-aids just like last time around. it's a shame

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

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the imminent huh
Apr 6, 2016



Combat Theory posted:

The problem is that the valvetronic mechanism is not wear compensated for the excenter shaft.

The whole unit relies on a very very precise setting of the excenter value on that shaft that has to be exactly the same for all intake valves.

This works good out of the box, but any kind of wear and especially non synchronized wear (for example due to hot spots, dirt assemblies etc) will drift individual valves away from their desired opening and therefore volumetric efficiency curve.

On an engine with full opening valves and a regular valvetrain a lift difference of 1/10 of a mm won't bother you at all, but on the valvetronic thats the difference between the engine idling and the engine throttling to a stand still.

Valvetronic could have worked without BMWs long life motor oil bullshit, maybe. But it's a fragile system by design.

Valvetronic also amplifies the problem of the valve stem seals wearing because at low lift, the relative velocity of the stem surface in the seal is low as well, meaning it's harder to build up a fully bearing dynamic lubrication film.

When the valvetronic wears you'll experience some of the worst engine behavior you can imagine and every mechanic thats not used to the system will go nuts at changing spark plugs, coils, injectors, filters and the like because there is absolutely no indication the valvetronic is worn the gently caress out other than experience or a mechanical post mortem when you extracted the bad boy from the cylinder head.

A new valvetronic and valve seals will run you north of 4000 euro at the dealership and if you stick to the horrible long life plan, you may be looking at that every 60-80k miles.

Never buy valvetronic.

Which engines used in BMW 1 & 3-series or Audi A3 & A4 from within, say, the last ten years would you say are worth considering?

I recently got a 2009 E90 with an N47 engine, which very quickly developed a timing chain rattle. Having bought it from a dealer I was lucky to not have to pay the replacement myself. I really like all other aspects of the car and had planned on keeping it for at least the next 300 000 km figuring, that another 2000Ä chain replacement somewhere down the line is a relatively small price to pay.

According to random internet forums every BMW and VAG engine, except maybe M47 and BFB, is a ticking time bomb, and the N47 issues still seem relatively benign compared to some other horror stories. But maybe I'm just an idiot trying to defend a bad purchase for myself?

Combat Theory
Jul 16, 2017



the imminent huh posted:

Which engines used in BMW 1 & 3-series or Audi A3 & A4 from within, say, the last ten years would you say are worth considering?

I recently got a 2009 E90 with an N47 engine, which very quickly developed a timing chain rattle. Having bought it from a dealer I was lucky to not have to pay the replacement myself. I really like all other aspects of the car and had planned on keeping it for at least the next 300 000 km figuring, that another 2000€ chain replacement somewhere down the line is a relatively small price to pay.

According to random internet forums every BMW and VAG engine, except maybe M47 and BFB, is a ticking time bomb, and the N47 issues still seem relatively benign compared to some other horror stories. But maybe I'm just an idiot trying to defend a bad purchase for myself?

BMW 6 cylinder Otto: M50, M50TU, M52, M52TU, M54
BMW 4 cylinder Otto: M42, M44
BMW 8 cylinder Otto: M60, M62

Watch out on the M60, these can drop the oil pump bolts. Open the engine bottom end and secure them with loctite.

If you buy any TU or later, get familiar with VANOS repair. It's not that difficult and not that expensive, but it seems like a huge undertaking first. It's really not.

High performance:
All naturally aspirated SxxBxx engines, but know that you'll be looking at frequent replacements of Con-Rod bearings. As well as complicated VANOS Jobs on the later models that have high pressure VANOS (a feature that was thankfully dropped at the E90 M3 S65)

BMW 4 cylinder Diesel: M47, M47TU, M47TU2

please note that the original M47 is a non common rail direct injection diesel with a VP44. the VP44 controller on the pump can burn out a transistor that can be user replaced by a better one if you can solder with a soldering iron.
The TU2 throws a check engine light if you deactivate the EGR without recoding, which can be done at almost every BMW specialist. Let them change the EGR parameter to +40 and you can kill the EGR without error codes.

Remove the swirl flaps on all M47TU and TU2s

BMW 6 cylinder Diesel: BMW M57
if there ever was a best diesel in the world, it's the M57. remove the swirl flaps and kill the EGR and this thing will not die. It's one of the best "just keeps going" engines money can buy.

They make a V8 diesel that I never saw in real life.

VW/Audi has poo poo engine numbering so this will be anecdotal.

All 1.9 TDIs with Pumpe-Düse. Indestructible little shits with legendary reliability. May need replacement harnesses for the PDEs because they are engulfed in oil all the time and become brittle. But it's a simple and cheap fix.

VR6 arent bad on reliability, but they aren't making good performance engines and they are very thirsty.

The simpler NA 4 bangers are good. But they need at least 2 liters or they are weird intermediate engines.

Performance: all Turbo 4 cylinders with the Yamaha head (20 valve), excellent motors.

All NA GTIs (16 valve)

No 3 cylinders. They are all poo poo.

Avoid their gasoline direct injection. The system is a waste of money and unreliable. BMWs direct injection was bad, but VWs is a joke.



All BMW N engines are just different levels of Bad. It sounds harsh but it is the truth. They jinxed their petrol engines with valvetronic and direct injection and they murdered their diesels by cheaping out on the timing chain and INSTALLING THE loving ENGINE BACKWARDS JESUS gently caress WHY DID YOU DO THIS.

Thank Zeus for killing the non stochiometric Otto with a lightning strike.

E: on the N47 watch for blue exhaust after acceleration from a stand still, it indicates blown valve stem seals. Also if your car misfires when cold and rough idles, the valvetronic is worn and needs replacement.

Always change engine oil after 6k-8k miles or ones per year. It's the only measure to preserve the engine as good as possible. Disregard the service counter. Change gearbox oil and diff oil and the coolant every 2 or 3 years or every 30k-40k.

Combat Theory fucked around with this message at Mar 24, 2019 around 19:44

Combat Theory
Jul 16, 2017



To go with the cars of the rising sun:

The NISSAN SR20 is one of the best 4 cylinders money can buy. Early transmissions are weak though. Never cheap out on the oil change.

The GA16 is also indestructible. Simple service and the thing will clock over 200000 miles on untouched internals.

The VG 6 cylinders are good, but their vacuum lining is a nightmare. Almost a week of work oft a professional to diagnose and fix vacuum problems at worst.

The RB engine series in all its 20 year old glory is wank material all around.
By my deeds, I honor him
You know you want it. I know I want it. What do I need it for? Stop asking its an RB. it serves its own purpose. Hell I'll learn Japanese to buy an oil filter I don't even care.

Earlier diesels are good, but not competitive. The RD series 6 cylinder diesel is the only pre Renault that is noteworthy but not comparable to modern DI diesels.

In the Renault time everything switched. Renaults diesels are good, but their petrol engines are absolute crap.

The first performance engine under Renault was the VQ35 which can be disregarded in its first generations. Only the VQ35HR starts to be good as in worth it regarding its thirst. It's also the most reliable of the 3.5 L VQs. The VQ37 is a straight evolution and also good.

Honda makes all around wholesome petrol engines, but disregard their new turbo petrols. If engines are a religion, VTEC is a prophet of biblical proportions.
Never had a Honda diesel.

Mazda I have no idea about their non rotaries. Don't get an RX8. the side exhaust port is an engineered weakpoint and lives up to the rotary fear of blown engines.

Add some 2 stroke oil to every tank of gas on a rotary.


Toyota, I only had a J8 land Cruiser that also deserves the term indestructo-mobile. But in nowadays terms a non competitive diesel.

If i was in the US I would be seriously eyeing a camry.

Subaru and Mitsubishi are uncommon here but to hell with me if I wouldn't buy a WRX STI or an EVO in a heartbeat.

Combat Theory fucked around with this message at Mar 24, 2019 around 20:28

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

there's a world that we know nothing about, that we can only imagine... and that is the world of books

Slippery Tilde

loll

https://twitter.com/brutapologist/s...918215918911488

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.



i bet the flyer is posted right next to elon's office window so he can look everyone who comes to read it straight in the eye

Trimson Grondag 3
Jul 1, 2007



Clapping Larry

Combat Theory posted:

BMW 6 cylinder Otto: M50, M50TU, M52, M52TU, M54
BMW 4 cylinder Otto: M42, M44
BMW 8 cylinder Otto: M60, M62

Watch out on the M60, these can drop the oil pump bolts. Open the engine bottom end and secure them with loctite.

If you buy any TU or later, get familiar with VANOS repair. It's not that difficult and not that expensive, but it seems like a huge undertaking first. It's really not.

High performance:
All naturally aspirated SxxBxx engines, but know that you'll be looking at frequent replacements of Con-Rod bearings. As well as complicated VANOS Jobs on the later models that have high pressure VANOS (a feature that was thankfully dropped at the E90 M3 S65)

BMW 4 cylinder Diesel: M47, M47TU, M47TU2

please note that the original M47 is a non common rail direct injection diesel with a VP44. the VP44 controller on the pump can burn out a transistor that can be user replaced by a better one if you can solder with a soldering iron.
The TU2 throws a check engine light if you deactivate the EGR without recoding, which can be done at almost every BMW specialist. Let them change the EGR parameter to +40 and you can kill the EGR without error codes.

Remove the swirl flaps on all M47TU and TU2s

BMW 6 cylinder Diesel: BMW M57
if there ever was a best diesel in the world, it's the M57. remove the swirl flaps and kill the EGR and this thing will not die. It's one of the best "just keeps going" engines money can buy.

They make a V8 diesel that I never saw in real life.

VW/Audi has poo poo engine numbering so this will be anecdotal.

All 1.9 TDIs with Pumpe-DŁse. Indestructible little shits with legendary reliability. May need replacement harnesses for the PDEs because they are engulfed in oil all the time and become brittle. But it's a simple and cheap fix.

VR6 arent bad on reliability, but they aren't making good performance engines and they are very thirsty.

The simpler NA 4 bangers are good. But they need at least 2 liters or they are weird intermediate engines.

Performance: all Turbo 4 cylinders with the Yamaha head (20 valve), excellent motors.

All NA GTIs (16 valve)

No 3 cylinders. They are all poo poo.

Avoid their gasoline direct injection. The system is a waste of money and unreliable. BMWs direct injection was bad, but VWs is a joke.



All BMW N engines are just different levels of Bad. It sounds harsh but it is the truth. They jinxed their petrol engines with valvetronic and direct injection and they murdered their diesels by cheaping out on the timing chain and INSTALLING THE loving ENGINE BACKWARDS JESUS gently caress WHY DID YOU DO THIS.

Thank Zeus for killing the non stochiometric Otto with a lightning strike.

E: on the N47 watch for blue exhaust after acceleration from a stand still, it indicates blown valve stem seals. Also if your car misfires when cold and rough idles, the valvetronic is worn and needs replacement.

Always change engine oil after 6k-8k miles or ones per year. It's the only measure to preserve the engine as good as possible. Disregard the service counter. Change gearbox oil and diff oil and the coolant every 2 or 3 years or every 30k-40k.

donít buy or keep European cars past warranty, got it.

Combat Theory
Jul 16, 2017



Trimson Grondag 3 posted:

donít buy or keep European cars past warranty, got it.

i view all my german cars like i view my motorcycles as hobby material. its immensely satisfying to keep them in good shape, but i do not rely on them and i would not advise anyone to rely on them as the main resource of individual mobility. And i say that having the good powertrains.

wargames
Mar 16, 2008

official yospos cat censor


Roosevelt posted:

i bet the flyer is posted right next to elon's office window so he can look everyone who comes to read it straight in the eye

you might be right, that way musk can fire you for walking past his door, he's done it before.

indigi
Jul 20, 2004

picture me workin McDonald's!
I'd rather pull a mac on you
sorry Ms. Jackson, but I'm packin


Pillbug

theflyingorc posted:

They moved the thread to a different forum, and then banned him for breaking the posting rules of the new forum

Real good moderation

Meanwhile, 30 day perma for the guy who won't stop mocking people who helped turn Virginia blue for caring about things

lmao at trying to take exclusive credit for a typical midterm legislative swing

the imminent huh
Apr 6, 2016



Combat Theory posted:

All BMW N engines are just different levels of Bad. It sounds harsh but it is the truth. They jinxed their petrol engines with valvetronic and direct injection and they murdered their diesels by cheaping out on the timing chain and INSTALLING THE loving ENGINE BACKWARDS JESUS gently caress WHY DID YOU DO THIS.

Yeah, I'll probably start looking for a pre-LCI 325 or 330xd at some point. At least replacing the chain raises the trade-in value of the 320d.

Thank you, I really appreciate your effort.







And at least this car has doors that can be opened in case of an accident.

Lord Stimperor
Jun 13, 2018

I'm a lovable meme.


Combat Theory posted:

i view all my german cars like i view my motorcycles as hobby material. its immensely satisfying to keep them in good shape, but i do not rely on them and i would not advise anyone to rely on them as the main resource of individual mobility. And i say that having the good powertrains.

Reading on SA about German car maintenance is like reading the Wikipedia entry for the Tiger tank, germanengineering.txt

Potato Salad
Oct 23, 2014

Nobody Cares



Tortured By Flan

Rex-Goliath posted:

i finally looked up the post you were banned for

lmfao that place sucks balls

Why are Raskolnikov38 and R. Guyovich mods anyway

They banned weasel for primarychat in the primary thread, the gently caress?

jit bull transpile
Jan 6, 2012

f $o(^PUPFRIENDS(friend)) q:friend="" d
. d snuggle^PUPROUTINES(^PUPFRIENDS(friend))

Gary’s Answer

Potato Salad posted:

Why are Raskolnikov38 and†R. Guyovich mods anyway

They banned weasel for primarychat in the primary thread, the gently caress?

evil weasel is an expert in a narrow topic and then can't stop himself from over confidently brow beating people about topics he's not an expert on and people got sick of it.

Trimson Grondag 3
Jul 1, 2007



Clapping Larry

Combat Theory posted:

i view all my german cars like i view my motorcycles as hobby material. its immensely satisfying to keep them in good shape, but i do not rely on them and i would not advise anyone to rely on them as the main resource of individual mobility. And i say that having the good powertrains.

yeah I donít even follow my own rule, my MY14 scirocco is out of warranty and would cost me 15k for a new transmission if it needed one. I havenít had any turbo pressure trouble or anything but will get rid of it at the end of the year.

that said Iím planning on eventually bringing home a Lancia from Japan if I can swing my transfer over there next year so I donít even have the reliable power train excuse in that case. lots of well maintained 80s eurocars in the Japanese auctions

Trimson Grondag 3 fucked around with this message at Mar 25, 2019 around 00:29

The_Franz
Aug 8, 2003

patton oswalt, aka:

- the bloodguzzler
- parton osmart
- the krustbuster
- bloodlard
- pat "the ton" owsdtwslalt
- the big patswald
- wifemurderer
- fentanyl prostate injection

jit bull transpile posted:

evil weasel is an expert in a narrow topic and then can't stop himself from over confidently brow beating people about topics he's not an expert on and people got sick of it.

aka typical phd behavior

Combat Theory posted:

i view all my german cars like i view my motorcycles as hobby material. its immensely satisfying to keep them in good shape, but i do not rely on them and i would not advise anyone to rely on them as the main resource of individual mobility. And i say that having the good powertrains.

i love my e46 and it's been rock solid on long trips outside of typical older car issues, but based on my own experiences and the word of others i will probably never buy a newer bmw or mb unless i'm getting rid of it when the warranty is up. the 328xi i had while they replaced my recalled airbags was... not impressive to say the least. for the price they charged it was absolutely not worth it

oh, if you happen to know who is responsible for not putting an extra mm or 2 of clearance between the inner ball joint nut and the engine mount so you can properly get a socket over it, please kick them in the groin for me vielen dank

BangersInMyKnickers
Nov 3, 2004

I have a thing for courageous dongles



RoastBeef posted:

I enjoyed mic dicta. I'm glad I'm not nearly online enough to know what brought it down,

the latest episode of This Week In Atrocity was pretty much a revive of it and featured our very own Randbrick

Shifty Pony
Dec 28, 2004

Up ta somethin'


College Slice

SEC filed a very brief reply which can be summed up as saying:

- no additional hearing is needed because no facts are in dispute, only the interpretation of the court order

- if the meaning of the language in an order is clear, it is not proper to consider settlement communications to muddy up that meaning.

- Musk's lawyers left out a bunch of settlement communications relating to that clause, so if you do want to consider settlement communications let us know and we'll give you copies.

Shifty Pony fucked around with this message at Mar 25, 2019 around 13:28

theflyingorc
Jun 28, 2008

THE REPUBLICAN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON


Young Orc

Potato Salad posted:

Why are Raskolnikov38 and R. Guyovich mods anyway

They banned weasel for primarychat in the primary thread, the gently caress?

wait lol, Raskolnikov?

mods have gone full tankie lol

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003

Get running
Start pumping your bunions, I'm coming
I'm the dumbest, who flamethrow your function to Funyons
Flame your crew quicker than Trump fucks his youngest
Now face the flame fuckers your fame and fate's done with


https://twitter.com/zomgapocalypse/...186715489226752

Shifty Pony
Dec 28, 2004

Up ta somethin'


College Slice

there is a recurring pattern where the current victims of a con blame those that uncover and stop the con for their losses.

theflyingorc
Jun 28, 2008

THE REPUBLICAN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON


Young Orc

Shifty Pony posted:

there is a recurring pattern where the current victims of a con blame those that uncover and stop the con for their losses.

Nobody likes admitting that they were an idiot

evilweasel
Aug 24, 2002


Shifty Pony posted:

there is a recurring pattern where the current victims of a con blame those that uncover and stop the con for their losses.

it makes sense, because the person who uncovers the con definitively ends hope that maybe it'll all turn out ok, and conned people really want it to turn out ok and they were not an idiot

it's why conning people who already got conned once is so easy; they're desperate to get back up to even and are even more credulous than before they were conned, not less

MomJeans420
Mar 19, 2007

Most of the gear, most of the time


New game, try to find a Tesla auto-piloting into a truck every day. I don't even cheat and read reddit, this poo poo just pops up on twitter. This is amazingly poor driving on the part of the owner too, but what else is new

https://streamable.com/c5hbu

theflyingorc
Jun 28, 2008

THE REPUBLICAN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON


Young Orc

i actually rode in my friend's Tesla Model 3 this weekend and it kept doing weird stuff when she tried to change lanes

like it would jerk her back towards her original lane when she was partway over, but there was nothing to hit in the other lane

lancemantis
Sep 14, 2007




Fun Shoe

did she touch the change lane button on her ipad?

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

there's a world that we know nothing about, that we can only imagine... and that is the world of books

Slippery Tilde

*sneezes across ipad, doors unlock and open on highway*

theflyingorc
Jun 28, 2008

THE REPUBLICAN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON


Young Orc

lancemantis posted:

did she touch the change lane button on her ipad?

I don't remember, I thought she was just driving and it seemed to be fighting her on lane changes. I didn't like it

other than that my main complaint was "why did you spend $50,000 on this ridiculous boondoggle"

mystes
May 31, 2006



lancemantis posted:

did she touch the change lane button on her ipad?
I have no idea whether this is a joke or not.

jit bull transpile
Jan 6, 2012

f $o(^PUPFRIENDS(friend)) q:friend="" d
. d snuggle^PUPROUTINES(^PUPFRIENDS(friend))

Gary’s Answer

theflyingorc posted:

i actually rode in my friend's Tesla Model 3 this weekend and it kept doing weird stuff when she tried to change lanes

like it would jerk her back towards her original lane when she was partway over, but there was nothing to hit in the other lane

my non lovely car does this if I don't signal my lane change because it assumes I am drifting.

is your friend a California piece of poo poo who doesn't signal their lane changes?

lancemantis
Sep 14, 2007




Fun Shoe

we call that the california lane change

i watched somebody try to merge into my car, finally fail when I sped up, then try again to merge into the car behind me which had to come to an abrupt honking halt

no signal at all and i'm pretty sure they were just relying on their rear view mirror entirely

this was all on surface streets

its when having the ability to judge, correctly or not, that someone is driving like a moron is handy for accident avoidance

infernal machines
Oct 11, 2012

Don't let the little fuckers generation gap you


mystes posted:

I have no idea whether this is a joke or not.

the model 3 does have a turn signal on the single control stalk

lancemantis
Sep 14, 2007




Fun Shoe

i'm guessing because there's something like a regulation about it?

TK-42-1
Oct 30, 2013

looks like we have a bad transmitter



Pillbug

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

*sneezes across ipad, doors unlock and open on highway*

new death cab song looking good

theflyingorc
Jun 28, 2008

THE REPUBLICAN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON


Young Orc

jit bull transpile posted:

my non lovely car does this if I don't signal my lane change because it assumes I am drifting.

is your friend a California piece of poo poo who doesn't signal their lane changes?

i don't think so???

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003

Get running
Start pumping your bunions, I'm coming
I'm the dumbest, who flamethrow your function to Funyons
Flame your crew quicker than Trump fucks his youngest
Now face the flame fuckers your fame and fate's done with


tesla is running straight up bait and switch nwo.

Base Model 3 isnít actually available
Service/Support
I just got a call from someone at Tesla asking me to pay more for the longer range model 3. Otherwise, my configuration wonít be ready until the end of June.

This is after telling me my car would be ready by the end of March and having me cough up more cash when I ordered.

Customer service is really souring me on this purchase. Makes me wonder if my car will ever be ready. Maybe Iíd be better to get the cash back and wait until one is physically in front of me before buying.

Anyone getting similar calls? This was the IL location.

wargames
Mar 16, 2008

official yospos cat censor


Endless Mike posted:

tesla is running straight up bait and switch nwo.

Base Model 3 isnít actually available
Service/Support
I just got a call from someone at Tesla asking me to pay more for the longer range model 3. Otherwise, my configuration wonít be ready until the end of June.

This is after telling me my car would be ready by the end of March and having me cough up more cash when I ordered.

Customer service is really souring me on this purchase. Makes me wonder if my car will ever be ready. Maybe Iíd be better to get the cash back and wait until one is physically in front of me before buying.

Anyone getting similar calls? This was the IL location.

Where have i heard this before

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8ro6kpKlw0

hobbesmaster
Jan 28, 2008


mystes posted:

I have no idea whether this is a joke or not.

lane keep assist is actually a pretty common feature these days. it'll warn or fight you if you don't signal a lane change

Dumb Lowtax
Jul 9, 2005

Save blue hippo from danger, vote for Moo Moo in the best cat contest

Plaster Town Cop

No they're talking about the lack of a turn signal stalk and punishing drivers who want to signal by making them take their attention off the road to the touchscreen UI

edit: oops

Dumb Lowtax fucked around with this message at Mar 25, 2019 around 19:47

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theflyingorc
Jun 28, 2008

THE REPUBLICAN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON


Young Orc

infernal machines posted:

the model 3 does have a turn signal on the single control stalk


Dumb Lowtax posted:

No they're talking about the lack of a turn signal stalk and punishing drivers who want to signal by making them take their attention off the road to the touchscreen UI

Wait, it does or doesn't have it

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