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elmer chud
May 18, 2018
(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

the world needs me, I'm singlehandedly keeping the american automotive industry alive!

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1031111742103814144

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Beamed
Nov 26, 2010

FAAAATHEEER
THE SLEEEEEEPER HAS *snooze*


lmao obstipator unironically loves jordan peterson jfc

EIDE Van Hagar
Dec 8, 2000

MVP
Most Valuable Poster Awarded 2002, 2005, 2007


Cybernetic Crumb


a friend of mine worked at a bitcoin miner asic design house for a while.

she met her future husband there right before everyone got laid off when it collapsed and has since divorced him so you have that to look forward to.

PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011



i wrote that post at 3 AM last night, after waking up in the male dormitory to see a girl sneaking in the room and getting in bed with one of the other guys here. in the darkness i could make out their smiles before they got into bed and out of view. this was a brave flirtation with danger. when i woke again it had been daylight for hours, and it was safe to assume the guest had returned to the ladies dorm, or wherever she came from.

not so. there was no way the forbidden lovers could hide under the minuscule bedding the homeless shelter afforded each bed. what i had seen that night and thought none of my business was about to become everyone’s business as the Sheriff herself ordered them out of bed loud enough to wake the building. I’ll call her Sheriff Butch Cassidy, a being with power on both sides of the law, a creature of pure authority. the walkie-talkie that swung from her hips said “lone ranger”, but the tattoo on her neck said “ex-con”. if the short bleached haircut didn’t say “butch lesbian” then frankly you must be blind and deaf, because she both looked it and said it.

“DARREL GET OUT OF BED” she yelled “THATS NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND”.

“YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS A WHITE BLONDE CHICK, YOURE SLEEPING WITH AN INDIAN”. an Indian herself, the Sheriff has license to say anything. that’s her side arm.

“JOYCE, GET OUT OF HERE. EVERYONE WATCH HER WALK OF SHAME.” the rest of the room laughs as the Sheriff continues to roast the two.

for those unlucky enough to have not been in the room, the Sherrif narrated loudly into her walker-talkie, “YALL MISSING AN INDIAN CHICK UP THERE IN THE WOMEN’S DORM? I FOUND HER IN BED WITH DARRELL. THIS DEFINITELY AINT HIS BLONDE GIRLFRIEND.”

the Sheriff banning them from the shelter was probably not the worst part of the punishment. they collected their backpacks and briefcases and silently bore the torrent of mockery and laughter.

just when it felt like the train was running out of steam, and the Sherrif’s wit was getting only chuckles, a crack addict with down syndrome bursts in the door and yells to the Sherrif “BITCH, I hosed your BITCH!”

“WHAT!?” she quickly answered.

“BITCH I hosed YOUR BITCH!”

the Sheriff bolts towards him, and he flees out the door with her following after. I hear the guy yelp and then the heavy metal door slams shut and the room cracks up again.

I couldn’t look at Darrel for more than a split second that morning. I did my best not to laugh, but failed to keep it in a few times. yesterday, before the lights went out and Joyce snuck in, darrel and I were alone in the dorm. he let out a gasp as he discovered something in his bag. “thank god,” he said to me “man, i thought I lost these.” he told me he’d found the last remaining photos of his two daughters, who his ex-wife has sole custody of. he sat next to me and quietly opined about missing them, and slowly flipped through the stack of 8 or so pictures. it was a deeply humanizing moment amidst the chaos. i didn’t want him to see me laughing at him the very next morning, and i hope he didn’t.

hours later i’d step out for some air, and at the opposite end of the parking lot sat darrel. next to him were his suitcase, his backpack and a white, blonde girl.

there was too much grief in the air for me to handle and i walked away from the shelter and to an vacant lot. i’m sitting in an abandoned car seat, writing this and having a little cry.

President Beep
Apr 29, 2009


Grahms ah dint fell so gud!


don’t do what darrell don’t does.

Cocoa Crispies
Jul 20, 2001

Vehicular Manslaughter!



Pillbug


Ford & Tesla are the only 2 American car companies to avoid bankruptcy. I just got home from the factory. Gonna get that down to just Ford.

Rex-Goliath
Nov 12, 2016



it’s made of rocket parts

Suspicious Dish
Sep 24, 2011



Fun Shoe

elmer chud posted:

the world needs me, I'm singlehandedly keeping the american automotive industry alive!

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1031111742103814144

isnt there only a third american car company, GM? 2/3 is not really success

PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011



Rex-Goliath posted:

it’s made of rocket parts

the last movie i watched was Event Horizon and I cannot shake the feeling that an unfathomable horror from a dimension between space and time has been released and shown to me, breaking my mind completely.

this very same morning a wheelchair-bound hobo poo poo the bed, and another 90 year old laid in bed butt naked and masturbated in front of the staff. a guy was drinking beer in the parking lot and refused to leave, and someone overdosed on fentanyl next to the front door. in one morning. gently caress.

Taintrunner
Apr 10, 2017



Jesus Christ PK. having been in your situation more than a few times I feel for you. keep your chin up and do your best to not look like a homeless person, it’ll get you farther than you think. you’ll get through this soon enough, even if it feels like there’s no end in sight.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



Nap Ghost

Suspicious Dish posted:

isnt there only a third american car company, GM? 2/3 is not really success

all the other carmakers went bankrupt and were bought by one of the big three and the marginalized.

almost every different named general motors line, for example, was once an independent company.

Suspicious Dish
Sep 24, 2011



Fun Shoe

yes so his tweet is basically saying "GM went bankrupt, Ford didn't, that means Tesla has to exist" which uh i dont even know where to start on that one

WithoutTheFezOn
Aug 28, 2005
Oh no

Chrysler went bankrupt.

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012


Suspicious Dish posted:

yes so his tweet is basically saying "GM went bankrupt, Ford didn't, that means Tesla has to exist" which uh i dont even know where to start on that one

and can only exist with him at the helm working the exact same way he just cried about in that bs article

prisoner of waffles
May 8, 2007

Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of the cross, the fishmech
About my neck was hung.


completely inflexible thinking that makes heavy use of absolutes: a sign of mental health and human flourishing

Triglav
Jun 2, 2007

IT IS HARAAM TO SEND SMILEY FACES THROUGH THE INTERNET


just started a car company thirty seconds ago

no operations yet, but only we, ford, and (for the moment) tesla are the only ones who have never declared bankruptcy

fermun
Nov 4, 2009

The X-Files will return in a moment.



https://twitter.com/TipOffAus1/stat...144272895135745

PCjr sidecar
Jan 26, 2011

dude, you gotta end it on the rhyme




a six hour layover; scouting delorean plant, scoring some new Protestant club drug fueling/crew stop?

PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011



obstipator posted:

if u let people walk all over u, ur not going to get out of the bad situation ur in

you're obviously a huge pissant unworthy of a reply, but sadly so is everyone in my family, and i can't say poo poo without them questioning everything i do and then refusing to help me because they would have done something differently. but for the benefit of anyone actually inquisitive enough to wonder why i wouldn't call the cops, here you go.

(and an aside: yes, ACAB. I could end it there, but i'll continue cause it might be interesting.)

first, this lady is a customer. she's likely a prostitute and is buying fat amounts of drugs daily from the main dealer at the shelter. everyone is told only to buy from her (the dealer lady) or else. and while people definitely break this rule, they never ever do it in public. i'm probably the softest person in this joint, and not even the hardest want to cross her. I publicly had a tug of war over the stolen property in the court yard with perhaps her biggest customer, so if this girl gets scooped up by the cops, they're going to know I reported her. and don't forget there is the "Sheriff" that can absolutely not keep her mouth shut, and would probably just roast me for snitching as i was loaded into the ambulance from the resulting syringe attack to my face and genitals.

moreover, this person cannot possibly be mentally fit to stand trial, not legally or in my opinion morally. the judges here are actually pretty cool and probably wouldn't do poo poo either. and if they were to throw the book at her, sorry, but i'd feel pretty bad that a person who speaks in utter word salad is being held responsible for acting on approximately the same level as a squirrel foraging for nuts. the crackhead with down syndrome has more self-control, yeah the one who ran in and yelled "BITCH I hosed YOUR BITCH" right at the "Sheriff".

last but not least, my Macbook and my iPhone are by far the most valuable items on display at this shelter. i avoided using them by spending days at cafes, the library, or volunteering in the kitchen where I could lock up my stuff. but my money ran out so eating at the shelter was the only option. i skipped 4 meals so i could stay at the library until check-in time. i worked all night in my bed after everyone was asleep. and Sunday, I just had to sit and work all day in the shelter. it was my first or second day of a new job (remote, online), and i hadn't submitted any code still. absolutely everyone pouring in for sunday lunch was eyeballing this macbook and the stress of clutching onto it for weeks, my only hope of livelihood, had brought me to this breaking point. and i swear they might as well have been flying around my head, flapping their arms like vultures, i was tripping that hard. and yet it was this day that i had to power through (i hadn't even signed the contract yet for the job). i worked until 2PM when i couldn't take it anymore and went and cried in a vacant lot.

Bulgakov
Mar 8, 2009


рукописи не горят


grahms!

President Beep
Apr 29, 2009


Grahms ah dint fell so gud!


holy cow. how long before you see some cash, pk?

also, computer touching from a homeless shelter is some loving crazy juxtaposition.

obstipator
Nov 8, 2009
Probation
Can't post for 29 days!


you say your fam will refuse to help you. do they actually know what your life is right now? fam is p much required to help you at this point regardless of any perceived past transgressions

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



Nap Ghost

obstipator posted:

you say your fam will refuse to help you. do they actually know what your life is right now? fam is p much required to help you at this point regardless of any perceived past transgressions



i don’t think you understand how lovely people can be to even family.

p kev should move into shadowhawk’s hacker hostel.

obstipator
Nov 8, 2009
Probation
Can't post for 29 days!


uhhhhh, im p sure its more likely that kev is too afraid to reveal to fam his situation in depth just like 95% of peeps would, and instead is dismissing the idea entirely before even trying

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



Nap Ghost

yeah most people living in a homeless shelter are just there because they’re afraid of asking their dad for a loan.

fart simpson
Jul 2, 2005



Lipstick Apathy

Mr. Nice! posted:

yeah most people living in a homeless shelter are just there because they’re afraid of asking their dad for a loan.

agreed op

obstipator
Nov 8, 2009
Probation
Can't post for 29 days!


most people are in a homeless shelter bc theyre mentally ill
kev doesnt sound mentally ill, so he better be out within 1-2 months

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



Nap Ghost

like my addict uncle that burned his last bridge with my father when my dad let him stay on the couch when he started catcalling my step mom and telling her that he'd gently caress her better than him, or the time when one of his other brothers came to take him out to dinner and when he asked if he had any money, snatched the cash out of his hand and slammed the shelter door on his face.

most people in shelters have major problems, likely including our friend keven here. i wish him the best, and i wish we had a functioning mental health system in this country and didn't treat addicts like criminals, but we do. some people literally destroy their lives due to mental illness and addiction. in the majority of cases there is no one to turn to and no safety net to catch them. we're the richest nation ever yet we let a chunk of our population live in some of the worst conditions in the world because

Mr. Nice! fucked around with this message at Aug 20, 2018 around 11:49

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



Nap Ghost

obstipator posted:

most people are in a homeless shelter bc theyre mentally ill
kev doesnt sound mentally ill, so he better be out within 1-2 months

kev doesn't sound mentally ill because you only read his posts online. the chance that he is there just because he's afraid to ask his family for help is infinitesimally small.

obstipator
Nov 8, 2009
Probation
Can't post for 29 days!


alls im saying is he worded his reply in such a way to suggest he didnt even try to ask them for help. as an outsider looking in, its a no brainer to ask them for help

Phobeste
Apr 9, 2006

never, like, count out Touchdown Tom, man

Grimey Drawer

Mr. Nice! posted:

kev doesn't sound mentally ill because you only read his posts online.

well,


that said all the best to you pleasurekevin.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005



Nap Ghost

obstipator posted:

alls im saying is he worded his reply in such a way to suggest he didnt even try to ask them for help. as an outsider looking in, its a no brainer to ask them for help

gently caress me?! duh! you're right. kev, you just need to call dad and ask for help then all your problems will be solved!


i work a lot with homeless and at risk veterans. people aren't in kev's situation just because they haven't asked family for assistance. there is no lifeline to call. if he had one, he wouldn't be living in a homeless shelter.

President Beep
Apr 29, 2009


Grahms ah dint fell so gud!


i still contend that offering kevin "advice" is dumb and pointless, because we're not that familiar with why he is where he is, nor do we need to be. i'm content in saying this: good luck, kevin. please feel free to share what you're comfortable sharing, and at least let us know how things turn out.

as a side note, cjs is a great place to hang out and air your woes.

big scary monsters
Sep 2, 2011

-~Skullwave~-


i think pleasure kevin has it in him to be the next elon musk and i wish him all the best on his journey to online billionaire crybaby

stay safe pk, hope the crypto job works out and you can get out of there and back on your feet

fart simpson
Jul 2, 2005



Lipstick Apathy

obstipator posted:

kev doesnt sound mentally ill

lol

Captain Foo
May 11, 2004

the cyberpunk dystopia is now
you are not the runner


Clever Betty

obstipator posted:

alls im saying is he worded his reply in such a way to suggest he didnt even try to ask them for help. as an outsider looking in, its a no brainer to ask them for help

shut the gently caress up and get out of yospos forever

flakeloaf
Feb 26, 2003

Still better than android clock



as a complete stranger, i

EVGA Longoria
Dec 25, 2005

Let's go exploring!


Captain Foo posted:

shut the gently caress up and get out of yospos forever

Lambert
Apr 14, 2018
I REALLY care about my FLAC files. Really REALLY care. I listen to my huge FLAC collection with my Special Ears. If you don't you're fucking stupid.


Fallen Rib

Suspicious Dish posted:

isnt there only a third american car company, GM? 2/3 is not really success

There's also the fact both Tesla and Ford received government assistance to stay in business.

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PleasureKevin
Jan 2, 2011



President Beep posted:

i still contend that offering kevin "advice" is dumb and pointless, because we're not that familiar with why he is where he is, nor do we need to be.

this would basically be the master thesis of my life up to this point.

obviously i’ve begged and pleaded to stay with my family endlessly, or just get some money or whatever, but i don’t know how to describe them. yesterday was so hosed up i just texted “please help me” for hours till he agreed to let me stay from 9pm till 4am.

he lives 5 blocks away from the homeless shelter. right next to some train tracks and the ocean. so i’m sitting between the two now just thinking about which one hurts less.

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