Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
red19fire
May 26, 2010

etalian posted:

He's a very Trumpian leader.

But in this case the supplier has already been paid in full but Tesla is demanding that they return some of this money.

It's vaguely like when Trump owned the USFL football team, the NJ Generals, and signed Doug Flutie to what was at the time the highest paid contract in football history. He then wrote letters to all the other USFL owners demanding that they each reimburse him for a portion of that contract, because adding Flutie to the league would raise attendance and concession sales at all the games in the league :laffo: The league folded like a year later, and everyone involved blames it on trump.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

red19fire
May 26, 2010

just :lol: at Elon Musk calling a dude's manager to complain, the most bitchmade white-chick-in-starbucks move of all time.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Ytlaya posted:

Tesla autopilot is like a car having an "explode" button, telling you not to press it, and then saying they have no responsibility for people doing so. Except actually worse in a way, since the nature of autopilot encourages using it "incorrectly," even if they warn you.

They should absolutely be held liable for damages/casualties caused by it, but I won't hold my breath.

I watched a long presentation from an actual AI programmer that debunked the Tesla autopilot features, and Uber’s self driving car bullshit. it’s just like cruise control, lane correction cameras and radar-controlled braking, but they call it autopilot so the fanboys and idiot buyers think they live in the Star Trek universe.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

"a fire extinguisher delivery system made of discarded rocket parts, attached to the bottom of a helicopter which is also made of discarded rocket parts. I will have my engineers build it and have it ready to beta test by Monday"
"Elon, that already exists and works just fine"
"YOU'RE A PEDOPHILE"

red19fire
May 26, 2010

MeatwadIsGod posted:

Glad to see Tesla has a rough analog to Enron's "let's put deals due years in the future down as current profits in this quarter."

If Tesla limps along another year, we're going to have something like the aircraft graveyard in Arizona only it'll be hundreds of thousands of Teslas rotting in the California sun.

Do those graveyard teslas have the batteries in them? l would worry that those cars are a dangerous firetrap from sitting out in the Arizona sun all day for weeks, as well as an ecological disaster waiting to happen if any one of the millions of questionably soldered & QC'd laptop batteries bursts, catches fire, and spreads.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Grimes as Elon’s girlfriend/horse girl daughter is 100% my favorite image of 2018.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Waffle House posted:

Private investment in Tesla sounds POSSIBLE, but it's clear that people obsessed with shorting Tesla stock have lost complete control of their previously comfortable-with-no-end-in-sight situation.

Elon Musk also could just be completely blowing smoke up people's asses on Twitter because people are retarded enough to eat it up, whatever their malfunction.

If I owned Tesla stock I'd love to be bought out by the dumbass owner overvaluing his own dying company at a premium. But I imagine most shareholders are death culters in it until the bitter end.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

remove all the switches
and die in the ditches
of smoke inhalation
my TE-ES-LAAAAA

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Menstrual Show posted:

I am loving losing it at that Azalea Banks poo poo

So anyone can just walk into his house? Does he still keep loose emeralds around? asking for a friend.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

bring back old gbs posted:

the actual azalea banks images are amazing:




:magical:

Good god, this could be the greatest burn of all time. Devastating.

Also Elon's sad dad bod in the Grimes-as-horse-girl photo makes so much sense as a side effect of bad PCT after an 'I'm a tech genius I don't need to consult experts' steroid regime.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

zegermans posted:

*FTC shows up to arrest Elon for transparent securities fraud*

DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY!

*forces elon into a model 3 and gently pushes it into a curb, it is immediately engulfed in 1200 degree flames*

IT'S JUST BEEN REVOKED

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Cerebral Bore posted:

Whoda thought that the rich-rear end motherfucker who hasn't ever had to face any actual adversity in his life would crumble completely once he had to deal with something that he couldn't just pay or bullshit himself through?


now that's some good poo poo right there

Hey, sometimes it’s hard, inheriting all your dads money from apartheid era diamond mining. It’s hard, being s billionaire and trying to break a union so that your workers don’t get too comfortable. It’s hard, calling SWAT on a guy who revealed that your manufacturing process will probably incinerate someone. It’s hard, ‘inventing’ things that already exist so you can keep the tech bubble inflated.

That’s why I’m starting a GoFundMe to pay some of Elon’s legal fees...

red19fire
May 26, 2010

babypolis posted:

a put is basically you buying a guarantee that allows you to sell a certain amount of an asset at a certain price. you can use it as insurance for a product you make so if it goes down in value you can still sell it at a profitable price. or you can bet on the price of something going down, and if it does you buy it at the new low price and sell it at the guaranteed put price

puts and their sisters call options (same thing but opposite, a guarantee to be able to buy something at a certain price) are cool because unless you do crazy shenanigans with them the only downside is the premium you paid for them. if poo poo goes bad you just choose to not exercise the option

IIRC there was a time in the pre-2008 stock market that derivatives/CDS swap traders wanted to outlaw shorting stocks because they considered it 'unfair downward pressure' on a stock price. I.E., they wanted to change the rules of the stock market so no one was allowed to bet against them, or on any financial instrument to decrease value.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Karl Sharks posted:

can you link this cause that's too much for me man

Oh gently caress the SEC actually did it, but after the crash: http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2008/09/get_shorty.html

Wall street cocksuckers lining their pockets off of falsified subprime mortgage applications was A-OK, but profiting off of the implosion of Lehman and shorting goldman/morgan/etc upon realizing they're also over-leveraged and teetering on the edge is a bridge too far, man. By denying that bloodbath, the SEC guaranteed an extended depression.

This was my 'holy poo poo, the entire system is rigged' moment in Econ undergrad.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Karl Sharks posted:

thanks


this guy obviously doesn't really seem to agree with the measure, but has there been any actual studies/analysis on the effect of short selling, to a certain degree, on a stock? seems interesting from a sociological standpoint, but i have a feeling, as it was mentioned in that article and in here, that there are never really enough short sellers to truly affect the price without a ton of bad poo poo already going on

Short sellers are almost pariahs in the stock market, but they're a necessary form of downward pressure on a stock price, otherwise you get a bitcoin style up uP UP mentality. Jim Chanos, aka the god of shorting, saw the writing on the wall for Enron before anyone else, and made a killing off shorting it while everyone else's long holdings crashed.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

I miss sliding keyboards on phones. Elon, can we put one in the center ipad console? it will be a big hit with like 1% of nostalgic dorks like me.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

infernal machines posted:

no, but seriously, they shipped the model 3 with brakes that performed worse than a 60s era land boat with drum brakes, and no one noticed until consumer reports published a review saying "this car will literally kill your whole family", at which point tesla went "oops" and pushed an over-the-air firmware update that re-calibrated the ABS.

I like that they assume that the Consumer Reports test track in Connecticut is the problem with the car's abysmal braking distance, since the death machine performed *below average* on the Edmunds perfectly maintained race car track. Nevermind that the CR track is probably about average for an American road and represents real-world driving conditions.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

No you guys don't get it. Anyone brave/stupid enough to go into a tunnel dug by Elon 'No Need To Consult Experts' Musk in earthquake-prone Los Angeles is a perfect candidate for his mars colonization suicide mission. It's not a tunnel project, it's an evaluation process.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Jonny 290 posted:

also the entire plot point at the end where he gets hosed out of his bonus and flips out, today it seems dumb because lol $250 amazon card, but back then a job like the one he had would often have bonuses tickling 50% or more of their annual salary. that poo poo was huge

It’s also fun to watch episodes of House with the slowly dawning realization that everyone he cures is probably saddled with at least six figures of medical debt. Like there’s an episode where he orders a bunch of MRIs to stall for time, and the guy probably racks up like $80k in debt as a result if he has lovely health insurance.

red19fire
May 26, 2010


This is great news, if you're a billionaire selling a poo poo product and need to expand your personality cult and bring in gullible morons to waste money.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

babypolis posted:

id say elon is way more evil than holmes but i dont know the whole theranos story.

Theranos helped spread malaria in Africa by deploying their barely-functional machines and giving false negatives all the time. There's also some stories in the Bad Blood book about Holmes having the coders make the machine give negative results instead of an error message so she wouldn't look bad in front of investors when demonstrating the machine. The book is mandatory reading for understanding the SV culture of 'nothing matters but getting more venture capital'.

She also had PI's and goons threaten the journalist who wrote the book while he was writing newspaper articles about Theranos as the only loving journalist to cast even the slightest doubt on a machine that could diagnose every disease on earth from one drop of blood.

red19fire has issued a correction as of 15:57 on Sep 5, 2018

red19fire
May 26, 2010

WhyteRyce posted:

Wait is Azealia Banks good again?

She’s ostensibly a rapper who released an actual album in 2012 to tepid reviews but is mainly known for twitter drama otherwise. For the purposes of Elon drama she is very good.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

brugroffil posted:

Paying in full for a car before you even see it

Do other manufacturers do this

:lol: I made this mistake once, with the first car I ever bought as a young marine, a 10 year old BMW. I believed the salesman when he said I couldn't test drive it because 'it's blocked in the lot and will take a while to get out' but I could pick it up the next day. Shockingly, it had nothing but expensive transmission problems for the year I owned it.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Raskolnikov38 posted:

https://twitter.com/Paul91701736/status/1043390703198511104

man i had no idea there were infinite free cars waiting to be stolen just an hour away from me

You could probably make a nice pile of loot by hopping the fence and stripping vital parts out of the all deadlined ones. With depleted batteries from sitting for months on end, it probably wouldn’t even trip the anti theft alarms.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Agronox posted:

i feel like i'm getting "late 2016" broke-brained again, but this time in a fun way

https://twitter.com/businessinsider/status/1045450441541259264

So she’s going to talk a ton of poo poo for like four years and finally release a 9 track album to middling reviews?

red19fire
May 26, 2010

https://twitter.com/RobinWigg/status/1046183645155926016

Good news guys, the SEC can't go after a snake oil salesman because then his snake oil company would collapse, and people might start asking questions about all the other snake oil companies in SV.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Gazpacho posted:

wait, how about this: a voucher for a car rental service so you can rent a car, to pick up your car

Uber, but only for driving to the Tesla pickup point. and then charge triple for the return trip when they inevitably reject it for paint defects or whatever.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Investing question, how do you do the Steve Carrell thing in The Big Short, where he meets the obnoxious mortgage guy at an expo and immediately bets everything he has against him, and ends up with like a 4,000% profit? Because that's how I feel every time I see a musketeer tweet, but I'm also broke as gently caress.

red19fire has issued a correction as of 00:22 on Oct 5, 2018

red19fire
May 26, 2010

The absolute boy has learned his less and is definitely not at it again.

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/159453674517692416

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1047997866474594304

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1047998560782827520

red19fire
May 26, 2010

19 o'clock posted:

Casey Neistat is a turd who similarly doesn't actually do anything. A fitting scenario.

yeah, he’s a ‘filmmaker/director/creative’ who’s never actually directed anything of note, he just makes gear review videos on YouTube.

So really the ideal Tesla customer.

red19fire has issued a correction as of 18:34 on Oct 5, 2018

red19fire
May 26, 2010

19 o'clock posted:

Thing is? I enjoy a good gear review. It's the celebrity he tries to provoke by riding an electric skateboard and bloviating about how important it is to be a "creative" and a "content creator" and blah blah blah.

I guess I'm of the grumpy old-man opinion that if you are actually so busy doing the things you say you are, how the gently caress do you have time to put together videos about how productive you are when nobody is looking?

Elon has the same poo poo show presentation: tweeting and interviewing all day about how busy he is not-tweeting and not-interviewing.

Yeah, he's one of the modern day snake oil salesmen. He makes more money selling the ideal of being 'a creative' rather than actually creating, because it's hard, usually unrewarded work. There's so many 'photographers' and filmmakers that sell this idea that if you do enough transcendental meditation and make a good vision board you'll just magically be successful, when here in reality you actually have to pound the pavement and put skin in the game. There's a guy who sells a seminar called 'how to become a $20,000 wedding photographer' who's never actually photographed a wedding for $20k and the photos that do exist of his work are absolute trash (he has done everything in his power to scrub his wedding work from the internet).

I have such an irrational hatred of that gary vee 'entrepreneur mindset' bullshit.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Look, if Tesla goes down, it's taking away a lot of tow truck business. Should short those companies too.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

This thread has inspired me to use the stocks tab in macOS. anytime I need a quick lol, I swipe over and look at that beautiful TSLA report. Is TSLAQ something I can add to it?

250 at close, 255 in after market trading. God drat.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Wait a minute, you mean to tell me the drama elemental Azalea Banks started poo poo with a far more prolific and better performer, then immediately hid behind her 'lawyer' when called out?

E: and Banks just tweeted a topless video of herself, for reasons unknown. I love this incomprehensible timeline.

red19fire has issued a correction as of 03:14 on Oct 10, 2018

red19fire
May 26, 2010


:lol: my Honda Fit started doing this once the roof seals gave up the ghost after 8 years of being parked outside in NJ.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Lote posted:

Stock down 5% today. Along with the Nasdaq. No bottom in sight. It’s looking like a massacre.

:stare:

Massacre is relative, TSLA was at 250 a month ago, it's 340 now. So either musk's ouster is saving the company, or traders genuinely believe these bullshit fudged accounting reports.

E: Oh, and Tesla's issuing a ton of junk bonds; famous for a mini-crash in the 80s and one of the sources of the 2008 crash.

red19fire has issued a correction as of 18:29 on Nov 12, 2018

red19fire
May 26, 2010

orcinus posted:

Nope. I'm like 90% sure the story went Union Pacific heads went into a meeting with Elon, he tried to threaten them into some idiotic deal by saying his e-trucks are gonna make railway obsolete, they said "cool story, bye." and ripped up the spur.

Elon couldn't have ripped it out because *he didn't own it, nor the land*.
It was UP's.

Wasn't he also several million dollars behind in payments to the railroad at that point? He wanted the debt restructured with insanely dumb terms, and the railroad balked. I think it was right after Tesla's definitely-not-bleeding-cash strategy of asking for refunds from suppliers.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

What happened with that ~300mil mortgage note that was due in November? Did Elon just put it in a different credit card?

red19fire
May 26, 2010

:lol: my $20k Honda has better fit and finish than a $70k luxury car. The only issue I've ever had was that they forgot to take the protective film off the rear passenger door handle.

https://twitter.com/anton_medellin/status/1072870245067452425

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

red19fire
May 26, 2010

orcinus posted:

https://twitter.com/zomgapocalypse/status/1072864199557160960

So loving stupid.
Let’s not put windshield controls on the stalks so they’re symmetric.
Let’s rely on auto wipers based on a loving camera.

You won’t care.

Drives me irrationally angry.

I bet if he could, Elon would put the turn signals on the iPad just to 'clean up' the dashboard.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply