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Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?



____________________________

Raw Results:
  • A recap aired of Heyman risking being fired last week unless he could produce Brock Lesnar in the ring, and Lesnar destroying Angle and then manhandling Heyman.
  • Kurt and Corbin came to the ring to discuss what happened. Roman Reigns came out and harassed Corbin for doing nothing to protect Kurt, and claimed if he'd been there he would have protected him. Roman insisted that Kurt not suspend Brock and delay his next title shot, and Kurt said the match was happening and he wanted Roman to win.
  • Corbin told Kurt he was being unprofessional and made excuses to Roman as to why he didn't fight Brock. He trash-talked Kurt for being nothing but a glorified matchmaker, so Kurt immediately made a match between Corbin and Roman.
  • Corbin cheapshotted Roman to start the match. He had long stretches of dominance and the match went through two commercial breaks. Roman finally got the upper hand and Corbin tried to bail, but Balor came down the ramp and distracted him, allowing Roman to hit the Superman Punch on the outside, get Corbin into the ring and pin him. The crowd seemed really into Roman during this match.
  • Balor got into the ring, dropkicked Corbin and then hit him with the Coup de Grace.
  • Seth Rollins spoke with Kurt Angle backstage about Drew or Dolph constantly assisting each other to his detriment. Kurt's answer was to let Seth tag with somebody tonight against both, which doesn't actually address the issue in any way. Seth seemed happy regardless.
  • Bobby Roode (eventually) beat Mojo Rawley in a singles match, even if it looked like he rolled off of Mojo a little earlier than the 3 count. They immediately cut to the back where Elias was managing his own camera crew.
  • Elias came out for his concert. He talked trash about Jacksonville and his own documentary crew he'd hired to film him. Bobby Lashley came out and beat him up, making the documentary crew come back to film him hitting a vertical suplex.
  • Michael Cole informed the audience at home that Ambrose was still out injured and would not be Seth Rollins partner. Tyler Breeze offered Seth his assistance (Crossfit Breezus as their team name) but Seth took Roman up on his offer to be his partner instead.
  • Rezar from the Authors of Pain defeated Titus O'Neill in a singles match.
  • Kevin Owens interviewed Jinder Mahal on a platform set up beside the stage, talking all over Jinder to brag about beating Strowman in a cage match. The platform got tipped over by BRAUN, though the bump that Owens and Jinder took didn't look particularly impressive.
  • Jinder Mahal defeated BRAUN by DQ when Owens tried to steal the MITB briefcase, BRAUN took him out but then hit Jinder with the briefcase.
  • Corbin passed his phone to Kurt Angle for ANOTHER message from Stephanie McMahon.
  • A video package for Lesnar/Reigns had Reigns claim that Brock had only REALLY beaten him once, since Seth interfered in their first Wrestlemania match and he "technically" should have won the cage match at Greatest Royal Rumble. He said with Lesnar aiming to go to UFC, Reigns HAD to win.
  • Baron Corbin and Kurt Angle informed Roman that once again in the interests of preserving the Summerslam Main Event, Reigns couldn't compete tonight. If he did, he would forfeit the Summerslam match. Seth said he would be okay and Reigns punched Corbin in the ribs after asking him how his ribs felt.
  • Finn Balor and Baron Corbin will fight AGAIN at Summerslam.
  • Seth fought Dolph and Drew by himself (the crowd chanted for Ambrose) and then got pinned after a superkick by Dolph.
  • The B Team vs. The Revival ended in a Double DQ when The Deleters of Worlds appeared and attacked Scott Dawson and Bo Dallas simultaneously.
  • Paul Heyman was interviewed by Renee Young about his relationship with Brock Lesnar. Heyman was freaked out, saying Brock had broken off all contact and he had no idea what was going on. He didn't know who if anyone he would manage if he couldn't do it for Brock, but also warned that Roman Reigns wouldn't stand a chance against Brock in his current state.
  • Sarah Logan and Liv Morgan defeated Sasha Banks and Bayley after a distraction by a hooded figure, who ended up being a returning Ruby Riott.
  • The B Team will defend their tag titles next week on Raw in a triple threat against The Deleters of Worlds AND The Revival.
  • Alexa Bliss took over a pre-match interview by Charly Caruso with Alicia Fox, to talk up how Alicia was unappreciated. They showed footage of Alicia getting the jump on Ronda last week.
  • Ronda Rousey showed up with Natalya for the main event and very quickly tapped Alicia out despite repeated attempts by Alexa Bliss to distract her. Nattie and Ronda hugged after the match and Alexa tried to jump her, but Ronda fought her off, then got on the mic and warned her that no matter what Alexa tried or how tight she held onto the belt, it would be Ronda's at Summerslam.
____________________________

Smackdown Results:
  • Randy Orton opened the show and did a promo about how he was going to be more violent than ever because he didn't get the respect he deserved, and he was going to destroy all the crowd's fan-favorites, just like he did to Jeff Hardy.
  • Backstage, Charlotte and Becky both insisted to each other they were cool with the Summerslam triple threat and would be able to work together as a tag team tonight.
  • Carmella was on commentary for Charlotte/Becky vs. The IIconics. The IIconics did a promo before the match mocking Becky for always being in Charlotte's shadow.
  • Charlotte and Becky defeated the IIconics, though Becky was less than thrilled that Charlotte blind-tagged in to lock in the Figure 8 and get the submission win. Post-match, the two presented a united front to argue with Carmella.
  • The New Day took over their own interview, sending Renee away so Kofi could put on a blonde wig and interview them as "Kramer King".
  • The Miz, in a pre-taped segment on the set of Miz and Mrs, accepted Daniel Bryan's challenge for a match at Summerslam.
  • Becky reminded Charlotte backstage that even though they won a tag match tonight, at Summerslam it is every woman for herself.
  • AJ Styles answered Samoa Joe's promo for last year, admitting that he had made some family sacrifices to get and retain the title, but everything he did was for them. He warned Joe that talking about his family had put him into AJ's bad books, and not only would Joe not walk out of Summerslam with the title, he would be lucky to walk out at all.
  • Samoa Joe was watching the interview backstage and laughed at the threat.
  • Rusev told Lana backstage that she was right last week, and this week he would be in his corner. They accepted an apology from Aiden English but warned him he couldn't join them at ringside.
  • Zelina defeated Lana again following a distraction when Aiden English rushed out to help Rusev who was being attacked by Andrade "Cien" Almas. English was furious with himself, but Rusev looked even more furious.
  • Shinsuke was interviewed backstage by Renee where he claimed he couldn't defend the US Title at Summerslam against Jeff Hardy since he'd been "erased" by Orton. When Renee said Orton hadn't meant that literally, he rolled his eyes and explained he understood metaphors.
  • R-Truth (with Tye Dillinger) approached to challenge Shinsuke to a Summerslam match, saying he would earn it by pinning... Carmella! As Tye explained it didn't work that way, Shinsuke mocked Truth in Japanese and left. Truth was horrified, and decided he was instead challenging Shinsuke TONIGHT.
  • Byron Saxton was in-ring to interview Miz (on the Titantron on location on the Miz and Mrs set) about Daniel Bryan, but Miz would only take about Miz and Mrs (and also pronounced gif "jif" :argh:). He finally got to talking about Daniel and got all fired up claiming he had carried Daniel all this way... and then Bryan appeared out of nowhere and started beating the poo poo out of him. Security tried to haul Bryan off but he fought them off too, only for Miz to just LAUNCH a vase of flowers at him and knock him down before escaping.
  • Shinsuke Nakamura defeated R-Truth, though Truth put up a good fight and had the crowd largely behind him.
  • The Bludgeon Brothers destroyed a couple of jobbers.
  • The New Day (Kofi and BIG E) defeated The Bar in a really good, long and fun match, and will now face The Bludgeon Brothers at Summerslam for the Tag Team Titles. The match ended with BIG E trapped in a crossface but powering up to his feet and lifting Cesaro off the mat, throwing him onto his shoulder and letting Kofi (who blind tagged) hit the Midnight Hour.

Jerusalem fucked around with this message at 02:59 on Aug 8, 2018

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Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

I was pretty excited for the Deleters of Worlds but I should have known that WWE wouldn't understand it or figure that they could do whatever they wanted with the booking and then just have them appear on the tron/teleport to the ring and the fans would just forget about their losses or gently caress-ups.

They've basically turned their lovely booking of Bray into the same lovely booking but for the tag team.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Smackdown results added to the OP - watch the main event tag match, it rules!

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

I'm repeating myself, but seriously please everybody watch the New Day/The Bar tag match from Smackdown. It was so good.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Jiro posted:

I look forward to how Graves will belittle her, because Vince kept feeding him lines.

By a stroke of luck, Vince's warped values end with him unknowingly complimenting her via Graves.

"Hey Renee, I heard you're happily married, content with your success in your chosen field AND that when listing your achievements you acknowledge luck and the assistance of others!"

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Oh God, The Sheik right? I remember after it came out he'd paid to win the title, the match was advertised as,"FINALLY the Sheik gets his shot" or something along those lines.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Lid posted:

Tim Storm and Nick Aldis fans are going to kill you.

Detective: This'll be a tough case, there are no suspects.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Punk was a great wrestler and WWE hosed him over pretty badly and never truly took advantage of his talents/ability.

That doesn't change that by a lot of accounts he's paranoid, quick-tempered and has a lot of abandonment/trust issues and takes it out in very negative ways on people who are close to him. Punk and Colt were really close friends for a really long time and it sucks that things are so bad between them now.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Blaise330 posted:

Congrats to Karl Anderson and his hot asian wife

Gallows: ....oh God yes....

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

davidbix posted:

Obviously, I'm curious what Punk has to say, and there are definitely parts of the picture that need clarity, but there's a reason that it seems like the public opinion is so lopsided so far.

Yeah, this is really interesting because all the info we do have paint an incredibly negative image of Punk, but even in spite of all the stories we've read or heard about how he can blow his top at friends "betraying" him it still seems bizarre that he'd act this way to one of his oldest friends.

Meltzer mentioned on the latest WOR that he spoke to somebody who knows both guys who wouldn't go into any specifics beyond saying that they sympathize with Punk in this situation, which makes me wonder if there is some part of the puzzle that is missing.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

DarkstarIV posted:

Dillenger may have been injured at tonight's house show in Florence. He was facing Shelton, and I guess the ref threw up the X a bit later. Had to be helped to the back. Wasn't limping however.

He was just saying TEN with his arms! :shobon:

davidbix posted:

I posted all of the Cabana/Punk lawsuit docs so far, including several that the the Sun Times missed, one of which seems particularly illuminating on top of what was in the complaint. Document links in this Twitter thread:

https://twitter.com/davidbix/status/1028772506986078208

Thanks Bix :)

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Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

The Hart Foundation was such a great team: Bret the technical guy and Anvil the dude who just smashes fools and is also completely out of his mind.


gently caress :smith:

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