Nintendo Switch: Today we're debating the best controllers to shove up your ass.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Nintendo Switch: Today we're debating the best controllers to shove up your ass.

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Judge Tesla: Oct 29, 2011

Detective No. 27 posted:

Wario Ware universe has some pretty good lore. A photo in Mona's house implies her parents are Daisy and Luigi.

Mona has a crush on Wario so this raises questions.

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

How old is Mario, come to think of it?

Miyamoto claims he's 25 iirc.

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:20

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 15:04

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

...do you not?

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:21

Meowywitch: Jan 14, 2010

Judge Tesla posted:

Mona has a crush on Wario so this raises questions.

Wario is not related to the Mario bros

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:21

Mega64: May 23, 2008; I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.

WHY BONER NOW posted:

The mario gang race against their own baby selves in go karts. The mushroom kingdom is some kind of singularity

To be fair, the second M&L game made the Mario Bros. meeting their baby selves canon.

I think the Toadstool era is a couple years after Donkey Kong but a long time before DKC. I don't know if the DK in the Mario vs. Donkey Kong games is Cranky or DK3, if the latter then it's post-Toadstool era where Mario hooked back up with Pauline.

DKC series probably takes place around the same time as the WarioWare series, so 15-20 years after Mushroom Kingdom era.

Great, now I'm probably gonna make an actual Mario timeline.

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:21

Willo567: Feb 5, 2015; Cheating helped me fail the test and stay on the show.

i hate to interrupt the mario bros. timeline chat, but how's the performance of cruis'n blast on the switch

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:27

External Organs: Mar 3, 2006; One time i prank called a bear buildin workshop and said I wanted my mamaws ashes put in a teddy from where she loved them things so well... The woman on the phone did not skip a beat. She just said, "Brang her on down here. We've did it before."

Mega64 posted:

Great, now I'm probably gonna make an actual Mario timeline.

Gonna need some primary sources:

Dearest Brother,

I write this missive to you during the second Rabbid incursion. While I hone my skills with a long rifle, I fear it may not be enough. The rabbids are relentless, and i have become well acquainted with their cruel physicality, mama mia!

The sky is darkening and I will not write much longer. Tomorrow we march toward a water level. If I don't make it, oopsie doopsie! - I will meet you in the cloud kingdom.

Your brother,
Luigi Mario

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:33

DoctorWhat: Nov 18, 2011; A little privacy, please?

Willo567 posted:

i hate to interrupt the mario bros. timeline chat, but how's the performance of cruis'n blast on the switch

According to Liam Robertson on Twitter, rock solid 60fps

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:46

Procrastine: Mar 30, 2011

Mega64 posted:

To be fair, the second M&L game made the Mario Bros. meeting their baby selves canon.

I think the Toadstool era is a couple years after Donkey Kong but a long time before DKC. I don't know if the DK in the Mario vs. Donkey Kong games is Cranky or DK3, if the latter then it's post-Toadstool era where Mario hooked back up with Pauline.

DKC series probably takes place around the same time as the WarioWare series, so 15-20 years after Mushroom Kingdom era.

Great, now I'm probably gonna make an actual Mario timeline.

Hmm. This one needs an update for games released since...

# ? Sep 14, 2021 20:58

Mega64: May 23, 2008; I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.

I'm doing research by reading random articles on the Mario Wiki, and

Why the gently caress didn't they use "Kongtroversy", what the gently caress is wrong with these editors.

Also the Wario page says Mona is Wario's love interest, so never trust Wikis.

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:23

mabels big day: Feb 25, 2012

Mona/Wario is a one way relationship at best

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:30

Procrastine: Mar 30, 2011

Mega64 posted:

I'm doing research by reading random articles on the Mario Wiki, and

Why the gently caress didn't they use "Kongtroversy", what the gently caress is wrong with these editors.

Also the Wario page says Mona is Wario's love interest, so never trust Wikis.

You first mistake was using the bad wikia wiki and not the (relatively) good independent wiki

Posting this timeline just for the bold claim that all Nintendo marketing materials featuring Mario are canon and happen between the platformers and the sports games

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:46

Stux: Nov 17, 2006

Procrastine posted:

You first mistake was using the bad wikia wiki and not the (relatively) good independent wiki

Posting this timeline just for the bold claim that all Nintendo marketing materials featuring Mario are canon and happen between the platformers and the sports games

lmao

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:50

Quantum of Phallus: Dec 27, 2010

thinking about game timelines is the most heinous poo poo imaginable in gaming. the people worried about the zelda timelines need their head examined

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:54

Mega64: May 23, 2008; I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.

Procrastine posted:

You first mistake was using the bad wikia wiki and not the (relatively) good independent wiki

You're right, this wiki is better just for letting us see Wario's poop.

quote:

The instruction manual for Wario World reveals several facts about Wario's personal anatomy.
He sees with 20/70 vision, even though his vision used to be "perfect". This is due to excessive studying.
His hand grip reaches 80 psi, allowing him to crush apples with ease. They are also "absolutely incredible for nose-picking".
He weighs 140 kg (308 lbs), though he claims this is a result of his layered clothing.
His abs have 10 rolls, though this may be 10 rolls of fat.
His shoe size is 11, and his foot odor is strong enough to instantly knock out cockroaches, though he personally enjoys this smell.
His brain has few wrinkles. The wrinkles in the brain allow for the storage of more neurons, meaning an improved processing power in thought - Wario believes the inverse, in that a wrinkled brain stems from overuse and results in "depletion of capacity".
The diagram shows a cockroach lives in his brain.
His teeth apparently have no cavities, as he claims to eat the bacteria that causes them. This is contradicted in WarioWare: Touched! in which he suffers from a series of debilitating cavities.
He can perform over 100 push-ups in a single sitting.
His stomach can hold 100 litres, and his bladder can hold 5 litres. The average human stomach and bladder can comfortably hold approximately 1 litre and 500 ml respectively.
He has "never once thrown up".

The above text is from the Super Mario Wiki and is available under a Creative Commons license. Attribution must be provided through a list of authors or a link back to the original article. Source: https://www.mariowiki.com/Wario

Mega64 fucked around with this message at 21:59 on Sep 14, 2021

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:56

Amorphous Abode: Apr 2, 2010; We may have finally found unobtainium but I will never find eywa.

At what point in the timeline does Mario break free from the television and drink the children's gallon of milk?

# ? Sep 14, 2021 21:59

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XrQZ3-QFao

This looks... promising? Not sure what to say when it's all cutscene and not gameplay but I like a lot of the character designs. First I'd heard of it.

# ? Sep 14, 2021 22:04

Quantum of Phallus: Dec 27, 2010

prerendered trailers are a pox

# ? Sep 14, 2021 22:09

SeANMcBAY: Jun 28, 2006; Look on the bright side.

Quantum of Phallus posted:

prerendered trailers are a pox

It's another reason why I appreciate Nintendo since most of their trailers actually show the actual games.

# ? Sep 14, 2021 22:12

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Quantum of Phallus posted:

prerendered trailers are a pox

agreed

SeANMcBAY posted:

It's another reason why I appreciate Nintendo since most of their trailers actually show the actual games.

also agreed.

This is just a tease I guess but I am looking forward to gameplay now

# ? Sep 14, 2021 22:15

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

Quantum of Phallus posted:

prerendered trailers are a pox

# ? Sep 14, 2021 22:29

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

I actually think pre rendered cut scenes have been a curse since the PS1

Takes me right out of the game to see the art style wildly fluctuate like that.

For example I preferred all the scenes in SNES Final Fantasy being made with gameplay sprites to FF7 having three minute pre rendered animations for attacks that looks nothing like the actual gameplay

# ? Sep 14, 2021 23:05

Wayne Knight: May 11, 2006

No Targets anywhere near me had them in store.
Ditto for gamestops.
Neither of the two walmarts in town had it, but one a town over showed it in stock. They didn't actually have it (or they hadn't found the box of them yet), so I went another town over.

They did actually have it.

I have an everdrive for the GBA one, and I'm not interested in the Wii one, which was literally a Fast and the Furious arcade port without the license.

Can't wait to play!

Wayne Knight fucked around with this message at 23:33 on Sep 14, 2021

# ? Sep 14, 2021 23:31

Hrist: Feb 21, 2011; Lipstick Apathy

Mega64 posted:

You're right, this wiki is better just for letting us see Wario's poop.

Why are his leg and arm filled with spaghetti? He's German. Nintendo can't keep any lore straight anymore.

# ? Sep 15, 2021 00:16

Aerofallosov: Oct 3, 2007; Friend to Fishes. Just keep swimming.

I'm curious about the OLED, but I may just keep my Lite or get a regular switch for Christmas. I'm enjoying Nexomon: Extinction well.

# ? Sep 15, 2021 00:25

Crows Turn Off: Jan 7, 2008

drat, so no price drop in the US? Or is Nintendo lying?

# ? Sep 15, 2021 00:32

hatty: Feb 28, 2011; Pork Pro

Don�t trust insider predictions

# ? Sep 15, 2021 00:59

Len: Jan 21, 2008; Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!

So the Gameboy virtual console is getting announced any day now right?

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:05

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

Len posted:

So the Gameboy virtual console is getting announced any day now right?

You mean the Gameboy Advance SP Pro OLED?

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:06

Red Warrior: Jul 23, 2002; Is about to die!

Bluetooth?!
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1437930124490457088

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:08

404notfound: Mar 5, 2006; stop staring at me

Red Warrior posted:

Bluetooth?!
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1437930124490457088

Oh poo poo, are they really doing it? Does this mean that those Genki adapters are useless now?

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:12

VladimirLeninpest: Jun 23, 2005; gn gorilla; Fallen Rib

Red Warrior posted:

Bluetooth?!
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1437930124490457088

Completely random thing to drop on a Tuesday.

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:13

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Red Warrior posted:

Bluetooth?!
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1437930124490457088

Yessssssss

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:13

Inzombiac: Mar 19, 2007; PARTY ALL NIGHT

EAT BRAINS ALL DAY

Red Warrior posted:

Bluetooth?!
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1437930124490457088

That's how the Joycons communicate so it's loving stupid for them to wait 4 year to enable it for headphones.

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:14

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Everyone's Switch is Pro

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:15

hatty: Feb 28, 2011; Pork Pro

Whoa Nintendo is ahead of the competition for once? Unreal

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:16

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

Red Warrior posted:

Bluetooth?!
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/1437930124490457088

Piccolo just removed his weighted clothes.

Nintendo finally getting serious about this fight... :getin:

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:17

ONE YEAR LATER: Apr 13, 2004; Fry old buddy, it's me, Bender!; Oven Wrangler

Woah, welcome to 2012 Nintendo, it's about time you stumbled into the room, sweaty and disoriented!

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:18

I said come in!: Jun 22, 2004

lol the Switch had blue tooth this entire time, but its been disabled.

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:19

The Anime Liker: Aug 8, 2009; by VideoGames

LMAO that some intern forgot to switch the Bluetooth on for like 4.5 years

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:19

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 15:04

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

I said come in! posted:

lol the Switch had blue tooth this entire time, but its been disabled.

That's kind of a reductionist way of looking at it but knowing Nintendo... Yeah, maybe

# ? Sep 15, 2021 01:20

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Nintendo Switch: Today we're debating the best controllers to shove up your ass.

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