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It's amazing how I can just throw all these potted plants around five feet in front of me from chest height and they don't shatter. The potter they hired must be augmented.
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Oct 21, 2018 01:47
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I Keep rereading The Man Who Was Thursday but it still makes no sense.
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Oct 21, 2018 02:26
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"sure ill be your inside man and help betray UNATCO at no risk to myself"
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Oct 21, 2018 02:33
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god manderleys office smells so awful. and he just sits there during debriefings like there isnt a shitter right behind his desk
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Oct 21, 2018 03:33
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Manderley does that as a power play. You ever hear of Lyndon Baines Johnson? The big cheese once took a poo poo with the door open while berating me for telling a journalist my loving name at a cocktail party.
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Oct 21, 2018 03:35
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Why are these security camera's so loud, surely this is an OSHA violation?
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Oct 21, 2018 03:48
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I spent a lot of time setting up a custom level 5 anti-hack security on my computer, but now I forgot my password and that stupid gently caress Pritchard can only hack up to level 3.
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Oct 21, 2018 04:20
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Maybe if I just keep pretending I don't see that guy darting between boxes he wont shoot me... "Probably just rats!"
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Oct 21, 2018 04:30
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i take all the snacks lying around. mission critical.
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Oct 21, 2018 19:36
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I've been rereading this paper on stealth choppers for at least 6 hours and it's still just after midnight.
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Oct 21, 2018 19:57
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Have you guys seen the new recruit? He stood in the break room staring at the wall with his arms at his side before yelling "LEG AUGS ACTIVATE" and then spent five minutes jumping up and down until he broke his loving legs.
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Oct 21, 2018 21:26
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Anyways, time to grab my pistol ammo from the boiler.
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Oct 21, 2018 21:27
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hey boss i am going for a walk in the park ill be back in an hour *finds datacube* password is smashthestate me: 
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Oct 21, 2018 21:55
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I'm gonna shoot the vacuum cleaner, and everyone goes crazy trying to shoot the vacuum cleaner. I won't go into the womans restroom, i'll hide in the maintenance closet.
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Oct 21, 2018 21:59
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Every time I get seen by that guy on the other side of the office, this loud frantic music starts playing.
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Oct 21, 2018 22:16
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-IPHrs414g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02qoZvcwvjA
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Oct 22, 2018 03:46
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That guy just shot with me a loving dart! I guess it's no big dea- *AUGH* hey that kind of hurt... *OH* Come on that's not nice! *OOF* THATS IT MOTHERFUCKER WERE GOIN TO PAIN TOWN.
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Oct 22, 2018 04:01
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| # ? Apr 23, 2024 19:05 |
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Man who can be bothered to remember poo poo around here *leaves sticky note on computer with login (ASmithee) and password (Smasthestate) next to ironic poster of The Sex Pistols*
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Oct 22, 2018 04:28
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