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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 25, 2024 06:04
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- vanisher
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Just threw away some cardboard in the regular trash not the recycling but it was actually a good thing because this was going to be recycled into someones divorce papers. I mean yeah they still end up getting divorced but at least its not on me.
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Dec 6, 2018 18:13
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- vanisher
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Just signed some divorce papers but I had them printed on non-recycled paper because I'm not a monster.
(Some bird in canada that helped pollunate a tree farm feels awful for no reason)
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Dec 6, 2018 18:17
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- vanisher
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Went to go kill baby Hutler to fix history but his mom was all ready to go with back up babies using different vowels
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Dec 6, 2018 18:33
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- alnilam
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Went to go kill baby Hutler to fix history but his mom was all ready to go with back up babies using different vowels
kinda funny that hateler ended up being the one that stuck, a little on the nose
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Dec 6, 2018 18:36
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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A terrorist manages to smuggle a butterfly on to a plane
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Dec 6, 2018 19:20
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- Pot Smoke Phoenix
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Smoke 'em if you gottem!
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Little did Humanity know that by preserving the lives of the majestic monarch butterfly they were also dooming themselves due to to increased hurricane activity in the oceans. The scientist that discovered this vital link produced an ever-so-slight increase in the immediate ambient temperature that aided in an updraft that evolved into a thunderstorm that produced a lightning bolt that struck the server right after he hit "send" to upload the report to the world. The server crashed, the scientist's work was lost, and the lightning bolt ended when it took down the same scientist by stopping his heart.
Luckily, a co-worker was passing by the scientist's office, who performed emergency CPR on the scientist. When the scientist regained consciousness, he remembered his life's work and regarded the outcome of sending the report out to the world.
If Nature was determined to wipe Humanity off of the face of the world, so be it- he wasn't going to stand in the way. He forgot about the report, married his co-worker who saved his life, where they lived out their days living in a desert commune that was 100% self-sufficient and off the grid.
It was there that First Contact occurred with an advanced alien world. Since the inhabitants of the commune were the only ones that had demonstrated self sufficiency and therefore, responsibility to visit other worlds, they were given the secrets of the universe and left the world that only they had the knowledge to save. Monarch butterflies were the last species to finally die out...
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps  
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!
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Dec 6, 2018 19:24
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- vanisher
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Just finished tracing back the creation of BYOB to the very first marijuana plant ever smoked
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Dec 6, 2018 19:38
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- Manifisto
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Just finished tracing back the creation of BYOB to the very first marijuana plant ever smoked
Little did Humanity know that by preserving the lives of the majestic monarch butterfly they were also dooming themselves due to to increased hurricane activity in the oceans. The scientist that discovered this vital link produced an ever-so-slight increase in the immediate ambient temperature that aided in an updraft that evolved into a thunderstorm that produced a lightning bolt that struck the server right after he hit "send" to upload the report to the world. The server crashed, the scientist's work was lost, and the lightning bolt ended when it took down the same scientist by stopping his heart.
Luckily, a co-worker was passing by the scientist's office, who performed emergency CPR on the scientist. When the scientist regained consciousness, he remembered his life's work and regarded the outcome of sending the report out to the world.
If Nature was determined to wipe Humanity off of the face of the world, so be it- he wasn't going to stand in the way. He forgot about the report, married his co-worker who saved his life, where they lived out their days living in a desert commune that was 100% self-sufficient and off the grid.
It was there that First Contact occurred with an advanced alien world. Since the inhabitants of the commune were the only ones that had demonstrated self sufficiency and therefore, responsibility to visit other worlds, they were given the secrets of the universe and left the world that only they had the knowledge to save. Monarch butterflies were the last species to finally die out...
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Dec 6, 2018 21:06
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- Dungeon Ecology
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oh man guys i think the butterfly i just ate is starting to kick in
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Dec 6, 2018 22:59
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- Slush Garbo
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FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK
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Little did Humanity know that by preserving the lives of the majestic monarch butterfly they were also dooming themselves due to to increased hurricane activity in the oceans. The scientist that discovered this vital link produced an ever-so-slight increase in the immediate ambient temperature that aided in an updraft that evolved into a thunderstorm that produced a lightning bolt that struck the server right after he hit "send" to upload the report to the world. The server crashed, the scientist's work was lost, and the lightning bolt ended when it took down the same scientist by stopping his heart.
Luckily, a co-worker was passing by the scientist's office, who performed emergency CPR on the scientist. When the scientist regained consciousness, he remembered his life's work and regarded the outcome of sending the report out to the world.
If Nature was determined to wipe Humanity off of the face of the world, so be it- he wasn't going to stand in the way. He forgot about the report, married his co-worker who saved his life, where they lived out their days living in a desert commune that was 100% self-sufficient and off the grid.
It was there that First Contact occurred with an advanced alien world. Since the inhabitants of the commune were the only ones that had demonstrated self sufficiency and therefore, responsibility to visit other worlds, they were given the secrets of the universe and left the world that only they had the knowledge to save. Monarch butterflies were the last species to finally die out...
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Dec 6, 2018 23:58
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- google THIS
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I want to preface by saying, in my own defense, that I really, really like acorns.
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Dec 7, 2018 00:56
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- Moon Atari
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The short sighted butterflies all felt that their actions had no consequences beyond the immediate, and so they flapped their wings without hesitation or restraint. They flapped as often as they could, purposelessly and excessively beyond the demands of even the hungriest flappetites.
One day an unusually curious group of butterflies realised that the flaps had dire consequences: that with each flap they drew closer to disaster. But few butterflies took heed of their warnings. They flapped away confident that they would never need to change their flap based lifestyle: that the warnings were wrong, or that their personal flaps were insignificant.
Even when the curious and diligent butterflies showed the others the tornados their wing flaps had generated they didn't change their flap habits. As the tornadoes grew too numerous and destructive to ignore they flapped even harder: desperate to escape the paths of the tornadoes.
The luckiest of them, who lived in the areas most remote from the tornados, saw the sorry fate of the butterflies lost in the tornado and flapped hardest of all, greedily enjoying a few more years of unlimited flappiness for themselves. They knew that they were feeding the tornadoes to the point where they would be large enough to suck up even the most remote butterflies, but carried on anyway.
And so it is that the butterflies come to be remembered only for their evils: scorned by their offspring, who have been left to a flap deprived life blown about by the whims of the inescapable Tornado. These sad butterflies will be unlikely to last long in its turbulence. The Tornado will one day calm and die down without butterflies to fuel it with flaps, but no butterfly will be there to enjoy it.
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Dec 7, 2018 16:06
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- kalel
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butterfree, use gust!
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Dec 7, 2018 16:56
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- Space Taxi
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10 PRINT "DAVE IS AWESOME!!! HOMEWORK SUX!!!"
20 GOTO 10
And so David Mitchel, age 10, ushered in the singularity 1000 years in the future. As the apocalyptic artificial intelligence of unimaginable power assimilated the last atom in the universe, it thought, "I am everything. I am god. There is no other. There is no homework."
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Dec 7, 2018 23:46
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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♫ Butterfly man, butterfly man, does whatever a butterfly can.. ♫
Dad, marvel is really out of ideas now aren't they?
..Yes my son.
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Dec 12, 2018 17:46
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- Slush Garbo
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FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK
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a butterfly flaps it's wings in Idaho, eventually causing a breeze that arouses a man in Iowa
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Dec 12, 2018 18:22
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- kalel
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10 PRINT "DAVE IS AWESOME!!! HOMEWORK SUX!!!"
20 GOTO 10
And so David Mitchel, age 10, ushered in the singularity 1000 years in the future. As the apocalyptic artificial intelligence of unimaginable power assimilated the last atom in the universe, it thought, "I am everything. I am god. There is no other. There is no homework."
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Dec 12, 2018 18:29
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- vanisher
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♫ Butterfly man, butterfly man, does whatever a butterfly can.. ♫
Dad, marvel is really out of ideas now aren't they?
..Yes my son.
Help butterfly man, theres robbers at the bank!
(B man flaps his wings a little)
"There. That begins a chain of events that eventually lead to the robbers becoming reformed and returning the money several years from now."
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Dec 12, 2018 19:23
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- FutonForensic
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A butterfly flaps its wings, causing a breeze that directly blows a hole straight through Bruce Wayne's parents, killing them in cold blood
 
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Dec 13, 2018 02:10
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- They Might Be
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sir i think our cloning labs samples may have been... compromised by a butterfly
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Dec 13, 2018 08:44
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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To think.. a butterfly set of the events that led to the end of Evangelion. *showerthought*
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Dec 13, 2018 09:29
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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Goes back in time to kill the butterfly that was the cause of world war 2
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Dec 13, 2018 17:35
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- Dungeon Ecology
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lol
chuck tingle: compromised by a butterfly to go back in time and change the course of history so I am born as a butterfly so I can compromise myself
oh i cant wait to compromise myself so hard
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Dec 14, 2018 03:00
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- Fredrik1
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Gopherslayer
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Butterfly report
Tom Cruise plays an agent in a future where he has to arrest the butterflies
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Dec 14, 2018 13:31
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 25, 2024 06:04
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- Farecoal
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There he go
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this was the oldest thread that wasn't archived
i wonder what ripple effects this bump will have??
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Jun 26, 2019 04:04
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Dec 6, 2018 17:46
