UFC January: Should Jon's Drug Tests Be Forgot and Never Thought Upon

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > UFC January: Should Jon's Drug Tests Be Forgot and Never Thought Upon

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Dr. Abysmal: Feb 17, 2010; We're all doomed

Jon has already hit the film study room for his next opponent, by typing "anthony smith full fight" into Youtube.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BsOcWZWFEyz/

# ? Jan 5, 2019 19:50

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 04:55

maffew buildings: Apr 29, 2009; too dumb to be probated; not too dumb to be autobanned

A lot of people undervalue Rockhold but I'm confident he can gently caress any of Jone's girlfriends

# ? Jan 5, 2019 20:04

Brut: Aug 21, 2007

Dr. Abysmal posted:

Jon has already hit the film study room for his next opponent, by typing "anthony smith full fight" into Youtube.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BsOcWZWFEyz/

hahahahahahaha

https://twitter.com/Super_Sodiq/status/1081625933793185792

# ? Jan 5, 2019 20:04

Bluedeanie: Jul 20, 2008; It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?

Surprised Lloyd is ok with a woman fighting back.

# ? Jan 5, 2019 20:06

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Dr. Abysmal posted:

Jon has already hit the film study room for his next opponent, by typing "anthony smith full fight" into Youtube.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BsOcWZWFEyz/

Glass table for chopping that coke. Marginal gains, lads.

# ? Jan 5, 2019 20:16

Josuke Higashikata: Mar 7, 2013

Rockhold and Jones is a good match up because Rockhold would finally be beaten into retirement, never to resurface.

# ? Jan 5, 2019 21:09

JHomer722: Jul 30, 2006; And you, you ridiculous people, you expect me to help you.

JaySB posted:

Luke Rockhold called out Jon Jones. Stylistically I kinda like the matchup.

i'm telling you, a full blown Jones AKA rivalry would own. Rockhold, Cormier, Cain.

# ? Jan 5, 2019 21:33

FishBowlRobot: Mar 21, 2006

JHomer722 posted:

i'm telling you, a full blown Jones AKA rivalry would own. Rockhold, Cormier, Cain.

Shades of the Dom and Alpha Fail rivalry. AKA will keep feeding Jones prospects to destroy until his body explodes. But from a cocktail of drugs instead of injuries.

# ? Jan 5, 2019 21:45

I.N.R.I: May 26, 2011

Brut posted:

hahahahahahaha

https://twitter.com/Super_Sodiq/status/1081625933793185792

not bad

# ? Jan 5, 2019 22:45

willie_dee: Jun 21, 2010; I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries

Bluedeanie posted:

Surprised Lloyd is ok with a woman fighting back.

Lloyd Irvin ran a bit of a rapey abusive cult like BJJ thing for awhile didn't he?

# ? Jan 5, 2019 22:59

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

willie_dee posted:

Lloyd Irvin ran a bit of a rapey abusive cult like BJJ thing for awhile didn't he?

Ran?

# ? Jan 5, 2019 22:59

Odddzy: Oct 10, 2007; Once shot a man in Reno.

willie_dee posted:

Lloyd Irvin ran a bit of a rapey abusive cult like BJJ thing for awhile didn't he?

A bit?

# ? Jan 5, 2019 23:09

Kilometers Davis: Jul 9, 2007; They begin again

willie_dee posted:

Lloyd Irvin ran a bit of a rapey abusive cult like BJJ thing for awhile didn't he?

https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1buc4n/lloyd_irvin_rape_truth/

# ? Jan 5, 2019 23:17

willie_dee: Jun 21, 2010; I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries

Fucks sake

# ? Jan 6, 2019 00:51

DumbWhiteGuy: Jul 4, 2007; You need haters. Fellas if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them motherfuckers. If there's any haters in here that don't have nobody to hate on, feel free to hate on me

I used to work with a guy who was an instructor under Lloyd for awhile and is a good friend of his and he said the same stuff like "just some guys running a train on a girl and she decided later she felt bad about it" in a way that made it seem like running trains on girls was just like a normal and typical thing and really creeped me out. He was also one of the dumbest people I've met professionally and reaffirmed my stance that MMA fighters are all incredibly dumb.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 01:45

Brut: Aug 21, 2007

https://twitter.com/oleynikufc/status/1081673827199922176

This is adorable.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 02:04

ccubed: Jul 14, 2016; How's it hanging, brah?

https://streamable.com/s/3kiy4/ttjetj

# ? Jan 6, 2019 02:47

I am Otis: Sep 22, 2003

ccubed posted:

https://streamable.com/s/3kiy4/ttjetj

lol

# ? Jan 6, 2019 02:59

Mean Bean Machine: May 9, 2008; Only when I breathe.

Rockhold would have nothing for Jones

# ? Jan 6, 2019 03:01

I am Otis: Sep 22, 2003

Mean Bean Machine posted:

Rockhold would have nothing for Jones

Yeah, Jones would probably stomp the poo poo out him

# ? Jan 6, 2019 03:02

Bluedeanie: Jul 20, 2008; It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?

Rockhold's sex perversion is high level but much more straight forward. Going on a reality tv show and asking a woman to her face on the first date if she spits or swallows and loving both Taylor Swift and Demi Lovato are all-American, first class, grade A horniness but also clearly develop on techniques that have been around in MMA since Tim Sylvia tried to make that girl think he was sexy by telling her a dude with steroid titties and a tattoo of a rhino on a unicycle broke his arm in three places.

Jones' horniness is on a whole other level, and is truly unique. Uploading a snapchat to his mistress saying "I can be such a pervert sometimes" like a 13 year old sending an unsolicited message to a classmate on AIM and then showing his dick that a journalist described as "ample," and then asking for a waitress' phone number in front of that same journalist immediately after telling the journalist that his relationship with his fiance has never been more solid is a whole new elevated level of technique that no one else can pull off, and Jones does it so easily it seems like it's just second nature. Really don't see Rockhold's path to victory here.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 03:20

I am Otis: Sep 22, 2003

Well if you're going to post your fantasy UFC sex stuff, I will share mine too.

If Jon Jones and Luke were to fight: I bet Jon Jone Big Fat Stinking penis gets good and hard, and that he pins luke Rockhold to the side of the cage and butt fucks him for an uncomfortably long time in front of luke's good friend Daniel Cormier (a man Jon Jones has beaten twice and would beat in a fight 101/100 times) as well as us, the always loyal pay per view watching fight fans.

:greencube:

# ? Jan 6, 2019 04:11

Tezcatlipoca: Sep 18, 2009

I am Otis posted:

Well if you're going to post your fantasy UFC sex stuff, I will share mine too.

Everything Bluedeanie said is true.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 05:08

Nothing But Hate: Oct 7, 2006; When night falls, she covers the world, in impenetrable darkness

ccubed posted:

https://streamable.com/s/3kiy4/ttjetj

Well that�s easily the best thing I�m watching today

# ? Jan 6, 2019 05:15

Dirt Road Junglist: Oct 8, 2010; We will be cruel
And through our cruelty
They will know who we are

Bluedeanie posted:

Rockhold's sex perversion is high level but much more straight forward. Going on a reality tv show and asking a woman to her face on the first date if she spits or swallows and loving both Taylor Swift and Demi Lovato are all-American, first class, grade A horniness but also clearly develop on techniques that have been around in MMA since Tim Sylvia tried to make that girl think he was sexy by telling her a dude with steroid titties and a tattoo of a rhino on a unicycle broke his arm in three places.

Jones' horniness is on a whole other level, and is truly unique. Uploading a snapchat to his mistress saying "I can be such a pervert sometimes" like a 13 year old sending an unsolicited message to a classmate on AIM and then showing his dick that a journalist described as "ample," and then asking for a waitress' phone number in front of that same journalist immediately after telling the journalist that his relationship with his fiance has never been more solid is a whole new elevated level of technique that no one else can pull off, and Jones does it so easily it seems like it's just second nature. Really don't see Rockhold's path to victory here.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 05:17

DO YALL WANT A BOXC: Jul 20, 2010; HAHA! WOOOOOOO WOOO!; Fun Shoe

david carmichael posted:

I dont think rockhold has anything for jones unless he can get him down and i dont think he can.

i agree with this. i think there's a really good chance luke gets knocked out before he can get him on top. he's really good on top but I'm not sure if he can get any top fighter down consistently

# ? Jan 6, 2019 05:18

Neurosis: Jun 10, 2003; Fallen Rib

Bluedeanie posted:

Rockhold's sex perversion is high level but much more straight forward. Going on a reality tv show and asking a woman to her face on the first date if she spits or swallows and loving both Taylor Swift and Demi Lovato are all-American, first class, grade A horniness but also clearly develop on techniques that have been around in MMA since Tim Sylvia tried to make that girl think he was sexy by telling her a dude with steroid titties and a tattoo of a rhino on a unicycle broke his arm in three places.

Jones' horniness is on a whole other level, and is truly unique. Uploading a snapchat to his mistress saying "I can be such a pervert sometimes" like a 13 year old sending an unsolicited message to a classmate on AIM and then showing his dick that a journalist described as "ample," and then asking for a waitress' phone number in front of that same journalist immediately after telling the journalist that his relationship with his fiance has never been more solid is a whole new elevated level of technique that no one else can pull off, and Jones does it so easily it seems like it's just second nature. Really don't see Rockhold's path to victory here.

Thank you

# ? Jan 6, 2019 06:36

Chris James 2: Aug 9, 2012

https://www.bjpenn.com/mma-news/ufc/breaking-jon-jones-set-to-return-at-marchs-ufc-235-event-in-las-vegas/ March pending NSAC clearance

# ? Jan 6, 2019 08:45

JaySB: Nov 16, 2006

Looks like we found out why we haven't heard anything from the UFC regarding Brock:
https://www.mmamania.com/2019/1/5/18170311/report-brock-lesnar-still-hasnt-paid-250000-fine-for-failed-ufc-200-drug-test-mma-cormier-jones

# ? Jan 6, 2019 12:54

Kilometers Davis: Jul 9, 2007; They begin again

Vitor licks feet and that�s real fuckin� cool.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 13:29

Bluedeanie: Jul 20, 2008; It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?

Kilometers Davis posted:

Vitor licks feet and that’s real fuckin’ cool.

He came closest to finishing Jones, too. I think we are on to something here.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 16:11

FishBowlRobot: Mar 21, 2006

ccubed posted:

https://streamable.com/s/3kiy4/ttjetj

Everyone should click this.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:00

Brown Paper Bag: Nov 3, 2012

https://twitter.com/sandhumma/status/1081938515988901894?s=21

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:02

FishBowlRobot: Mar 21, 2006

Brown Paper Bag posted:

https://twitter.com/sandhumma/status/1081938515988901894?s=21

Lol at the state of LHW.

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:16

Lid: Feb 18, 2005; And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.

Anthony Smith challenging Kevin Lee for most generic title contender

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:26

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

JaySB posted:

Looks like we found out why we haven't heard anything from the UFC regarding Brock:
https://www.mmamania.com/2019/1/5/18170311/report-brock-lesnar-still-hasnt-paid-250000-fine-for-failed-ufc-200-drug-test-mma-cormier-jones

Hmm, why would the UFC just pay that? Are they really that out of the loop on what Brock is (not) doing?

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:26

Josuke Higashikata: Mar 7, 2013

Jon Jones could probably 2 v 1 the LHW division as long as the two doesn't include DC

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:26

Kilometers Davis: Jul 9, 2007; They begin again

Bluedeanie posted:

He came closest to finishing Jones, too. I think we are on to something here.

if you suck toes and beat up jon jones then you�re a true friend imo

# ? Jan 6, 2019 17:35

Lid: Feb 18, 2005; And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/EssentialCanineAlligator-mobile.mp4

# ? Jan 6, 2019 18:14

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 04:55

Lid: Feb 18, 2005; And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.

https://i.imgur.com/16IygC8.gifv

# ? Jan 6, 2019 18:16

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > UFC January: Should Jon's Drug Tests Be Forgot and Never Thought Upon

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