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Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



2018 is dead, but before it shuffled off this mortal coil, it dumped off a whole heaping load of movies on us, both good and bad and things in between. Some were surprising hits, some were obvious blockbusters, some were incoherent messes, and some were even not from Disney! Worldwide, Avengers ruled the roost, but in America, Black Panther was on top.


First The Hall of Shame!

Unnecessary Sequels\Reboots -

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald - You know a film series is off to a good start when most of the publicity is the creator and director publically defending their domestic battery enthusiast star. Combine that with a film that was at best incoherent and at worst a bloated mess and you got yourself a death spiral stew going!
Production Budget: $200 million
US Box Office: $156.6 million
Total Box Office: $628.5 million

Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation - This third installment of the animated monster series drew inspiration from star Adam Sandler's tendency to do films just to have paid vacations with his friends. Outside of that, I don't know anything about them. Someone is seeing these movies, it just might even be you!
Production Budget: $80 million
US Box Office: $167.5 million

Dr. Seuss' The Grinch - The Grinch hates stuff and also Christmas but definitely hates whatever corporations paid him to had during the marketing lead up to this animated three-dux of the green classic.
Production Budget: $75 million
US Box Office: $265.5 million
Total Box Office: $469.4 million

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again - Someone made a sequel to a popular musical, rejiggered most of the Abba songs around, and (supposedly) messed up the timeline something fierce with the flashbacks and flashforwards. And Cher is there!
Production Budget: $75 million
US Box Office: $120.6 million
Total Box Office: $393.8 million

Solo: A Star Wars Story - Directors yanked off of production, expensive reshoots, (possibly planted) stories about the lead needing acting training, something interesting turned into a blander mess, and the whole thing shoved out as quickly as possible right after the biggest movie of the year instead of delaying it for Christmas like sensible people. Solo had everything going against it and still came out okish even if it is one of the weaker franchise entries. I liked it but fully understand it is full of flaws and blandness.
Production Budget: ~$275 million
US Box Office: $213.8 million
Total Box Office: $392.9 million


A Star is Born - This movie seems to get remade all the time, and it was time, so it happened.
Production Budget: $36 million
US Box Office: $201.0 million
Total Box Office: $389.0 million


Fifty Shades Freed - Remember that one of these came out in 2018? Of course you don't, because 2018 lasted 15 years and no one remembers. Something must have happened in this entry, unlike part 2 which was just brief stalking before resuming normal sex.
Production Budget: $55 million
US Box Office: $100.4 million
Total Box Office: $371.4 million

Peter Rabbit - Hip modern Peter Rabbit is a proactive Home Alone with cgi bunnies and a lot of people getting mad at at the trailer. The film just ended up average, which is the worst possible thing that could have happened.
Production Budget: $50 million
US Box Office: $115.3 million
Total Box Office: $351.3 million

Ralph Breaks the Internet - The original was amazing but the sequel's commercials just looked like Disney showing off all their IP and also the IPs of any internet company that sliped them a few bags with dollar bills on them. Supposedly there was a plot but darned if you will know what it is if you haven't actually watched it.
Production Budget: $175 million
US Box Office: $175.9 million
Total Box Office: $350.1 million

Ocean's 8 - A film that seemed to get made only so they could have that shot of them all on the subway. It wasn't actually that bad and actually suffers more from being connected to the larger franchise than is helped by it, but this is probably the only way they could get an all-female heist movie funded.
Production Budget: $70 million
US Box Office: $140.2 million
Total Box Office: $297.7 million

Pacific Rim Uprising - I don't even know where to start with this one. Much more boring than the original, one of the main characters if fridged fairly early (or helicoptered, same difference), John Boyega has little to work with, Chinese plots are shoehorned in as payment for boosting the original film's box office, and the fights are mostly robot vs robot instead of having big monsters. Was pretty darn mad.
Production Budget: $150 million
US Box Office: $59.6 million
Total Box Office: $290.5 million

Maze Runner: The Death Cure - The last entry finally came out, but at least it had a good excuse with the main actor getting hit by a car. And now there are no more mazes to run. If you want, you can pretend this was also the final part of Divergent as that will never get made and all these post-apocalyptic YA series start to blur together. Whose to say that Divergers aren't just across the next maze?
Production Budget: $62 million
US Box Office: $58.0 million
Total Box Office: $288.3 million

Tomb Raider - Lara Croft returns in reboot form or a perfectly adequate adventure.
Production Budget: $94 million
US Box Office: $58.3 million
Total Box Office: $274.7 million

Mary Poppins Returns - Mary Poppins in Blunt form to help the spawn of her previous family continue to be rich despite screwing it all up. Also instead of giving Julie Andrews a role, Aquaman did instead and that film beat Mary Poppins in the box office. The lesson is clear.
Production Budget: $??? million
US Box Office: $99.3 million*
Total Box Office: $174.5 million*

The Predator - Shane Black returned to Predator this time with creative control and produced the most devisive entry yet. Too bad none of the rumored endings with Ripley or Arnold got made as the online fights would never end.
Production Budget: $88 million
US Box Office: $51 million*
Total Box Office: $160.5 million*

Johnny English Strikes Again - Every seven years there will be a Johnny English movie. And I'm fine with that.
Production Budget: $25 million
US Box Office: $4.3 million
Total Box Office: $157.9 million

Bumblebee - Sixth time's the charm?
Production Budget: $135 million
US Box Office: $67 million*
Total Box Office: $157 million*

The First Purge - When you can't quit a franchise, it's prequel time! And with how profitable this still was, the purging will never stop!
Production Budget: $13 million
US Box Office: $69 million
Total Box Office: $136 million

Unfriended: Dark Web - When your horror movie isn't as scary as what Facebook actually did...
Production Budget: $1 million
US Box Office: $8.8 million
Total Box Office: $11.2 million

God's Not Dead:A Light in Darkness - God keeps faking his death and only Hercules can save the day by punching God until he admits he's still alive.
Production Budget: $?? million
US Box Office: $5.7 million
Total Box Office: $??? million

Goosebumps 2: Haunted Halloween - Jack Black made that House with a Clock in the Walls movie instead of this, both turned out average but House at least had pumpkins puking.
Production Budget: $35 million
US Box Office: $46.7 million
Total Box Office: $92.5 million

Overboard - Like the male main character, I got amnesia and forgot this existed. It's still surprise sex, kidnapping, and slavery even when gender-swapped even though I like the original.
Production Budget: $??? million
US Box Office: $50.3 million
Total Box Office: $91.2 million

Sherlock Gnomes - Gnomeo & Juliet's sequel also just picked a gnome pun and went full bore into it, though once again Johnny Depp shows up to ruin everything and everyone.
Production Budget: $59 million
US Box Office: $43.2 million
Total Box Office: $90.3 million

Robin Hood - The only movie on this list with its own cryptocurrency. The only debate is who lost more money in 2018, bitcoin enthusiests or the producers of Robin Hood? I'm not sure how you screw up a movie about robbing from the rich and rebelling against a terrible ruler in this political climate but these not-so-merry men did!
Production Budget: $100 million
US Box Office: $30.6 million
Total Box Office: $73.4 million

Suspiria - I guess this was okay but the original is a megaclassic for a reason and only a few people seem to think this held a candle to it.
Production Budget: $??? million
US Box Office: $2.5 million
Total Box Office: $4.9 million

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - This made a bunch of money but this franchise is still weirdly dull.
Production Budget: $170 million
US Box Office: $416.8 million
Total Box Office: $1,304.9 million

Incredibles 2 - A sequel that could never live up to the original doesn't, but at least it put up a good fight.
Production Budget: $200 million
US Box Office: $608.6 million
Total Box Office: $1,242.6 million

The Girl in the Spider's Web: A New Dragon Tattoo Story - One of the longest titles in 2018 belonged to this reboot that just made the 4th book (not by the original author) with an all-new cast and none of the marketing, and soon became The Girl who Lost a Franchise
Production Budget: $43 million
US Box Office: $14.8 million
Total Box Office: $34.2 million

Death Wish - Bruce Willis wears a hoodie while shooting brown people in 2018. The film is so tone deaf it doesn't even understand the concept of music. Stick to the originals and the contemporary ripoffs if you want your criminal shooting catharsis.
Production Budget: $30 million
US Box Office: $34.0 million
Total Box Office: $34.0 million

Sicario: Day Of The Soldado - A Sicario sequel became another film where people just shoot a bunch of brown people. It also didn't have the decency to be good like the first one or star a woman like Peppermint.
Production Budget: $35 million
US Box Office: $50 million
Total Box Office: $75.8 million




Team Boring - Films that were so dull they defied people's abilities to call them dull.


Skyscraper - You love The Rock, so you'll love him if part of his body is missing! Okay, a disabled hero sounds cool, but this is already fighting against being a Die Hard clone before we see him swinging outside the building. At least it proved (again) that The Rock alone still isn't box office success, it needs to be part of a good movie package.
Production Budget: $125 million
US Box Office: $ 67.8 million
Total Box Office: $304.1 million

Isle Of Dogs - What could have been cool gets bogged down in weird ethnic issues and less hearth than normal We Anderson stuff. Plus it was delayed for some reason to boot!
Production Budget: $??? million
US Box Office: $32.0 million
Total Box Office: $64.2 million

Smallfoot - When your movie comes and goes from the theater and the only memory people will have is because of a meme video, your film might be boring.
Production Budget: $80 million
US Box Office: $82.6 million
Total Box Office: $213.5 million

A Wrinkle in Time - Disney gave Ava DuVernay money to make whatever she wanted and she made this. Probably too weird looking for mass audiences but expect it to become an obscure cult classic in 25 years.
Production Budget: ~$120 million
US Box Office: $100.5 million
Total Box Office: $132.7 million




Insane Failures - The movies that make you wonder why God invented movies when he could have invented more dinosaurs

The Nutcracker and the Four Realms - Disney misfired this franchise attempt to badly it left theaters before people could even make the proper amount of nut jokes! A weird-looking live-action fairy tale that didn't excite the young kids it was targeting nor the older teens with money to burn. At least it wasn't full of nazi symbology like the other Nutcracker movie... Disney will need a movie that made like $2 billion in order to offset this disaster!
Production Budget: $120 million
US Box Office: $54.5 million
Total Box Office: $169.9 million


Mortal Engines - Long ago this was just a glit in Peter Jackson's eye, then suddenly it became a real movie from his production company that snuck into the theaters without a word of promotion to annoyed audiences who were bored and angry. It did become the last big failure of 2018 (unless you count the next movie listed here!)
Production Budget: $100 million
US Box Office: $14.7 million*
Total Box Office: $62.6 million*
82 Uni. $ $14.7 23.5%

Holmes and Watson - Though I don't think this is as bad as everyone is saying, considering the pedigree and how low all the scores are then Holmes and Watson is a rare full speed crash into a wall for this team. That by itself is notable enough it makes the failures section.
Production Budget: $42 million
US Box Office: $19.8 million*
Total Box Office: $23.8 million*

Show Dogs - The only movie on this list where it was edited while in theaters because it seemed to be advocating that being molested is just a part of life! I have no idea if the video versions are uncut or edited.
Production Budget: $5.5 million
US Box Office: $17.9 million
Total Box Office: $39.2 million

Slender Man - It came from this very forum so you know we have to hate it. The only thing Something Awful hates more than everything else is Something Awful. According to the classic movie cost formula it made enough there might be more slender men in our future.
Production Budget: $10 million
US Box Office: $30.6 million
Total Box Office: $51.7 million

Ready Player One - Steven Spielberg took one of the worst books in existance and turned it into his worst movie ever, which was still sort of adequate. It's in this category just because of how low Spielberg has sunk.
Production Budget: $175 million
US Box Office: $137.7 million
Total Box Office: $582.9 million

The Happytime Murders - I've been talking about this movie for years and years and then it finally happened and now I want to invent the technology for Eternal Sunshine so I can forget that I was ever enthusiastic for this project.
Production Budget: $45 million
US Box Office: $20.7 million
Total Box Office: $27.5 million

Gotti - One of the strangest of 2018 releases, a mess of a movie that tries to make the gangster a hero, but it was also connected to MoviePass (at first unannounced!) and it's failure at the same time MoviePass was beginning to implode helped propel it to Bad Movie Heaven
Production Budget: $10 million
US Box Office: $4.3 million
Total Box Office: $4.3 million

Future World - James Franco and Lucy Liu go Mad Max without anny of the things that make the Mad Max movies good. It does have Snoop Dogg in it, though... It was briefly limitedly in theaters, maybe, I think, but mostly just stank its way to video release
Production Budget: $?? million
US Box Office: $?? million
Total Box Office: $?? million

Mile 22 - I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more just to not watch this movie that wastes cast members from The Raid like it was a Star Wars movie or something. Peter Berg and Wahlberg make the perfect team of people who are busy making these bad films which keeps them out of good films.
Production Budget: $50 million
US Box Office: $36 million
Total Box Office: $66 million

Life Itself - The best part of Life Itself is listening to people who saw the movie talk about the movie, often punctuated by at which point they had already figured out the "twists" and were now stuck watching the movie unfold like a slow motion car wreck. The moral is movie are bad and we should all watch puppet shows at the park.
Production Budget: $??? million
US Box Office: $4.1 million
Total Box Office: $5.9 million






2019 ROLL CALL:
The movie about a dog coming home where the trailer spoilers the whole movie
Replicas - two Keanus, unknown number of dead dogs
Glass - hopefully awesome, looks fun
Thread favorite The Kid Who Would Be King
A Jacob's Ladder remake - The fact I've heard 0 things about this seems bad
A Miss Bala remake - see the original
Lego Movie 2.0 - Hard to match the original in fun and heart quotient but maybe this time everything will be awesome again
The Mr. Plow movie - No one will ever remember the actual name of this movie
Alita: Big Eyes Angel - Delayed and with slightly different eyes
Yet Another Madea Movie - Just when you thought he was hanging up the wig
Captain Marvel - real 90s kids remember when this movie took place
Sad Dumbo - Burton warping Dumbo into a prequel to Batman Returns was not a movie I saw coming...
Shazam - looks funny and dumb and will watch this one
Hellboy remake - Wasn't feeling the trailer to this one so it's probably a wait until cable movie
The Curse of La Llorona starring white people pretending to be Mexican
Avengers: All the Money - Even the people who hate Marvel movies but somehow always see each one will go see this one
Uglydolls - blah blah beauty comes from inside blah blah
Detective Pikachu - Somehow this looks good
a different movie about a dog on the move called A Dog's Journey (this is getting out of hand, etc etc)
John Wick 3 (released the same day as the dog movie above, lol)
Aladdin in real life form - Will Smith assures us the Genie is blue
Minecraft - If they just streamed some Twitch guys in a theater they'd make more money and production costs would be $150 million less.
Godzilla and other awesome monsters in awesome movie
Dark Phoenix - Set rumors portray this as troubled but it might just be terrible no matter what
Men In Black reboot - Great cast with a bad trailer, hopefully the film isn't a mess but who knows
Shaft: 3 Shafts - This seems so weird and unnecessary I must watch it!
Child's Play reboot without the original crew who are still making their own Child's Play movies
Toy Story 4 - Back again to make you cry
Spider-Man: Far From Dust - The leaked plot sounds like it addresses the refugee movement in Europe in a clumbsy way if you want to know how all the think pieces will go.
Lion King: Not Technically Live-Action but That's What We'll Call It
Dora the Explorer - Thank goodness for the rule against telling people what you jack off to...
New Mutants - unless it also is delayed again!
That Fast and Furious spinoff with The Rock and Statham, will no one remember that HE KILLED HAN!!??!?!?!
Untitled WB Event Film I - When your event can't even think of a name....
Artemis Fowl (There will be a review that is titled "Artemis Foul")
Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark - A movie that will never be as scary as the pictures in the books
Are You Afraid of the Dark? - Okay, we get it, dark reboots,
Angry Birds 2 - this time the birds are angry about
Playmobil - Lego Movie Lite
Angel Has Fallen - First she was a centerfold, now she needs LifeAlert
something called My Boyfriend's Meds that will undoubtedly be well nuanced
It 2: The Wrath of Clown
Joker - Can this film live up to the constant stream of leaked set photos?
Zombieland 2 - Rumored to have TWO Ghostbusters this time
Charlie's Angels reboot - Elizabeth Banks is involved so that's far more promising than anything else
another Terminator movie - outside of the promo pictures there has been radio silence, but I've already lost faith in this franchise ever being good again. Prove me wrong, producers!
Sonic the Thin Legs - People will still want to bone him
Frozen 2: Elsa Better Have a Girlfriend! - 0% chance this will live up to the original but I'll settle for something good
Kingsman - Pretty sure this is a prequel
Jumanji 3 - No real word on this one either but rumor is the same cast will be "controlled" by different players so should act different, except maybe
Cats (my vote for must-see movie of the year just for how weird and awesome it will be!)
Star Wars 9 Lives - you'll know it's here when your youtube recommended videos get 100000% worse
Masters of the Universe - Still on the
The Call of the Wild - In animated form, this was one of my favorite books as a kid
Little Women - Not sure we need another one of these but at least I can post Friends clips of when Joey reads the book
100% No Joy Spawn remake
and a bunch of Untitled Horror Movies


Honorable thread title considerations:
Who Greenlightninged 2019 - We've seen things you people wouldn't believe
Who Greenlightninged 2019 - Bring it in guys! *All the franchises come in for a HUGE retread* (sadly too long!)
Greenlighted 2019: Coupon: The Movie
Im just tired of all these DisneyWars
Who Greenlighted 2019 - Endgame
Who Greenlighted 2019 - The Blockoffice Bomb Who Would Be King
Who'd Greenlit 2019: not a single OC to be found
Who Greenlighted 2019: After The Fall Of New York
Greenlight Academy 2019: Citizens On Patrol
Happy Greenlightening 2019 2U

Prior threads:
2018
2017
2016
2015
2014
2013
2012
2011
2010
2009
2008

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Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



Now the traditional pointing out of typos, errors, and major movies I missed!

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

Death to 2018! Long live the new flesh!

Reposting my post from the last page of the last thread because lmao at this news:

https://twitter.com/consequence/sta...592441881907201

18 years in and we bone like we're cheating on each other WITH each other. A decade-plus and their brown/taint-area still pOwns my dick.

Tars Tarkas posted:

Joker - Can this film live up to the constant stream of leaked set photos?

Also, a reminder: there are not just one but TWO Joker movies in production! There's the Joaquin Phoenix one that the set photos have been coming out about, but also Jared Leto signed up to do like two additional Joker movies when he became attached to Suicide Squad, so the first one of those is in production now, I believe.

Rageaholic fucked around with this message at Jan 3, 2019 around 00:01

Big Mean Jerk
Jan 27, 2009

Bunts are good


Grimey Drawer

People thought Isle of Dogs was boring?

It was easily in my top 10 for last year.

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!

Isn't the Jacobs Ladder remake just Hulu Original Pooka? Because that was just Jacobs Ladder and I wish I could remember which thread I saw a goon recommend it in so I could tell him that Jacobs Ladder is the better movie.

Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

by FactsAreUseless


Rageaholic Monkey posted:

Reposting my post from the last page of the last thread because lmao at this news:

A few months ago, Kevin Smith announced that he had just finished (or just started - one or the other) work on a writing job which he boasted had given him an opportunity to work with the biggest IP he'd ever ever worked on and would be the "biggest budgeted" work of his career.

I remain unsure what it is.

Maybe it's this.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

Big Mean Jerk posted:

People thought Isle of Dogs was boring?

It was easily in my top 10 for last year.
Yeah. I usually hate Wes Anderson movies but I saw it anyway. The animation was neat, but nothing beyond that grabbed me at all. I completely forgot it existed for months after I watched it until it got nominated for a Golden Globe or whatever.

Tars Tarkas posted:

The Mr. Plow movie - No one will ever remember the actual name of this movie
I legitimately can't wait to see this. The trailer brings me so much joy whenever I see it in theaters. It looks so stupid and fun.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7C2Nad0aMPg

Rageaholic fucked around with this message at Jan 3, 2019 around 00:15

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!

Big Mean Jerk posted:

People thought Isle of Dogs was boring?

It was easily in my top 10 for last year.

I really liked it but from my experience there was a lot of debate about whether or not it was offensive from the usual Wes Anderson crowd.

DC Murderverse
Nov 10, 2016

"Tell that to Zod's snapped neck!"


Tars Tarkas posted:

Now the traditional pointing out of typos, errors, and major movies I missed!

a star is born is amazing gently caress you

wyoming
Jun 7, 2010

Like a television
tuned to a dead channel.


2018 was so goddamn long I could've sworn Isle of Dogs was years ago.

Art style was alright, it wasn't great though.

DC Murderverse
Nov 10, 2016

"Tell that to Zod's snapped neck!"


wyoming posted:

2018 was so goddamn long I could've sworn Isle of Dogs was years ago.

Art style was alright, it wasn't great though.

i totally forgot that Tomb Raider not only came out, but came out literally this year. it is definitely one of those blockbusters that has completely gone down the collective cultural memory hole already.

ALFbrot
Apr 17, 2002


Rageaholic Monkey posted:

Death to 2018! Long live the new flesh!

Reposting my post from the last page of the last thread because lmao at this news:

https://twitter.com/consequence/sta...592441881907201

18 years in and we bone like we're cheating on each other WITH each other. A decade-plus and their brown/taint-area still pOwns my dick.

*Finally!!!*

Cythereal
Nov 8, 2009
I only want two things: new neck bones for Lowtax, and for you to shut the fuck up about pretending characters are lesbians to prove your wokeness.


Was Uprising really just this year?

Such an awful attempt to ape the first movie without understanding what made the first one tick.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

DC Murderverse posted:

a star is born is amazing gently caress you
It was okay. Not terrible but nothing great either. Some of the songs are great, but that doesn't mean the movie itself is.

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006



I've always hated that these threads never used "Greenlit" because Greenlighted sounds terrible but I'm cool with Lightninged.

A True Jar Jar Fan
Nov 3, 2003

Diamond


Suspiria 2018 ruled, Godzilla 2019's going to rule

Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



Big Mean Jerk posted:

People thought Isle of Dogs was boring?

It was easily in my top 10 for last year.
It seems to be really divisive and I saw it on several top and bottom lists, when normally people are jumping on top of each other to try to praise Wes. Most things I saw just seemed to ignore it.

Len posted:

Isn't the Jacobs Ladder remake just Hulu Original Pooka? Because that was just Jacobs Ladder and I wish I could remember which thread I saw a goon recommend it in so I could tell him that Jacobs Ladder is the better movie.

This one is by David M. Rosenthal and it sounds like they are trying to change it a bit so it might end up being less of a remake then it sounds like Pooka is (which sounds like it should have been a remake of Harvey, which is also getting a remake at some point soon)

DC Murderverse posted:

a star is born is amazing gently caress you
Hey, I like many of the films I made fun of, but it's definitely a film that's been remade a few times.


Cythereal posted:

Was Uprising really just this year?

Such an awful attempt to ape the first movie without understanding what made the first one tick.
It felt like they combined three different fanfics together at once, I can understand ditching the lead as he was the worst part of the original most of everything else they did was bad

Big Mean Jerk
Jan 27, 2009

Bunts are good


Grimey Drawer

Cythereal posted:

Was Uprising really just this year?

Such an awful attempt to ape the first movie without understanding what made the first one tick.

They went full anime instead of the 50:50 anime/tokusatsu ratio of the original and wasted John Boyega in the process. Such a shame.

asecondduck
Feb 18, 2011

Wait. What the heck happened to the first duck?


Tars Tarkas posted:

It seems to be really divisive and I saw it on several top and bottom lists, when normally people are jumping on top of each other to try to praise Wes. Most things I saw just seemed to ignore it.

I still haven't seen it, but Cinefix crowned it the best animated film of 2018, while noting that everyone seems to have forgotten it.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

Best animated film of 2018 is Into The Spider-Verse. There are no other worthy contenders. Period.

Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



Spider-Verse is why you don't make your end of year lists in November (I have no idea if Cinefix did that, but I saw a few other sites putting them out that early lol)

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon


Nap Ghost

John Wick 3...this time he has to put down the Dog that must make it home in a tragic finish.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

Tars Tarkas posted:

Spider-Verse is why you don't make your end of year lists in November (I have no idea if Cinefix did that, but I saw a few other sites putting them out that early lol)
I waited 'til December 30th to finalize mine but I wasn't able to see 2018 movies that were getting a bunch of buzz like If Beale Street Could Talk, so I didn't put it on my list.

Of course it starts playing at a theater here tomorrow, right after the year ends

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003


Yams Fan

I was actually a thinking that I wouldn't put it past Fox to try and turn a classic episode of The Simpsons into a 90 minute picture, or at least pull a Wrath of Khan.

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon


Nap Ghost

1. Godzilla King of the Monsters
2. John Wick 3
3. Cold Pursuit
4. Elsa 2: Lesbian Boogaloo
5. Avengers: All the Money

My most anticipated 2019.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

I'm watching TV and I just saw an ad for Replicas, which apparently opens next week? This is literally the first marketing I've seen for it whatsoever.

I know, I know: gently caress You, It's January! and all, but drat

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcOTiTVuizU

Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

by FactsAreUseless


I don't know if I'll go to see many movies in the cinema this year. I went far more than usual last year (five times) but this year I'll go and see Avengers and Star Wars and that will probably be it.

asecondduck
Feb 18, 2011

Wait. What the heck happened to the first duck?


Tars Tarkas posted:

Spider-Verse is why you don't make your end of year lists in November (I have no idea if Cinefix did that, but I saw a few other sites putting them out that early lol)

The video came out the last week of December, but in the video they note they haven't watched Spider-Verse yet.

Which, like, your loving job is to watch films and make videos about them, how the gently caress are you sleeping on a film that everyone is raving about online?

Cythereal
Nov 8, 2009
I only want two things: new neck bones for Lowtax, and for you to shut the fuck up about pretending characters are lesbians to prove your wokeness.


Gatts posted:

1. Godzilla King of the Monsters
2. John Wick 3
3. Cold Pursuit
4. Elsa 2: Lesbian Boogaloo
5. Avengers: All the Money

My most anticipated 2019.

Sadly, I still very much doubt that Disney's going to make Elsa a lesbian. I think they're going to deliberately make it seem like she might be if you care to read her that way, but queer-baiting costs them nothing and making an important character overtly gay absolutely would - much less a Princess, and on top of that their best-known (and best-selling) modern character. I don't think the soulless suits who run the Mouse will calculate that the gains from making Elsa a lesbian will outweigh the gains of merely baiting without confirming.

https://twitter.com/billboard/status/969180596596625408

It's a nice dream, but I'll believe it when I see it.

AlBorlantern Corps
Mar 4, 2017

love 2 post about seth


Gatts posted:

1. Godzilla King of the Monsters
2. John Wick 3
3. Cold Pursuit
4. Elsa 2: Lesbian Boogaloo
5. Avengers: All the Money

My most anticipated 2019.

Does anyone think Frozen 2 will actually have a gay romance in it? At best it will have mild flirting that could be interpreted as non romantic. Disney doesn't have the guts. If they do I'll be very pleasantly surprised.

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon


Nap Ghost

Elsa is a hot chick who should be banging other hot chicks...like...literally on fire chicks. Awwwww yeah. And then Disney can throw a XBender in there...a...Gender Bender....

Go for the gusto.

AlBorlantern Corps
Mar 4, 2017

love 2 post about seth


Not sure what you are going for there

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon


Nap Ghost

AlBorlantern Corps posted:

Not sure what you are going for there

Yeah I kind of forgot too. I was going for something like a progressive joke but then fell on the landing. Ah well.

I actually like Disney Princess movies so I'm looking forward to Frozen 2.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Sometimes
people need a reminder
that Nazis are supposed to be
on the wrong end of the gun.


Shredded Hen

Gatts posted:

a progressive joke but then fell on the landing
Hillary Clinton?

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon


Nap Ghost

Rageaholic Monkey posted:

Hillary Clinton?

I...don't know...what that means. Like, first Elsa has a girlfriend, then go the next step and bend her gender. Like you have an Ice Queen, a Fire Queen, and you get a Gender Bender like Avatar the Last Airbender.

Cythereal
Nov 8, 2009
I only want two things: new neck bones for Lowtax, and for you to shut the fuck up about pretending characters are lesbians to prove your wokeness.


Gatts posted:

Yeah I kind of forgot too. I was going for something like a progressive joke but then fell on the landing. Ah well.

I actually like Disney Princess movies so I'm looking forward to Frozen 2.

Frozen had my pick for the worst Disney princess of modern times: Anna. Every time I've babysat my niece and she wanted to watch Frozen, it sank in more and more what a terrible person Anna is. And she's the protagonist.

Then again, Disney's marketing lately has been weird as hell. Elsa's only in Frozen for ten, maybe fifteen minutes, yet she's everywhere in the marketing. Brave's marketing made the movie seem to be about everything except the actual story of the movie: a strained mother-daughter relationship.

Dark_Tzitzimine
Oct 9, 2012

by R. Guyovich


Cythereal posted:

Sadly, I still very much doubt that Disney's going to make Elsa a lesbian. I think they're going to deliberately make it seem like she might be if you care to read her that way, but queer-baiting costs them nothing and making an important character overtly gay absolutely would - much less a Princess, and on top of that their best-known (and best-selling) modern character. I don't think the soulless suits who run the Mouse will calculate that the gains from making Elsa a lesbian will outweigh the gains of merely baiting without confirming.

https://twitter.com/billboard/status/969180596596625408

It's a nice dream, but I'll believe it when I see it.

Speaking of, there was a supposed plot leak for Frozen 2 where Elsa was now a wealthy businesswoman. It was ridiculous enough that I can believe it was true.

Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

by FactsAreUseless


Cythereal posted:

Then again, Disney's marketing lately has been weird as hell. Elsa's only in Frozen for ten, maybe fifteen minutes, yet she's everywhere in the marketing.

Hey, I wouldn't knock it - Anthony Hopkins was able to win an Oscar in about as much time!

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon


Nap Ghost

Dark_Tzitzimine posted:

Speaking of, there was a supposed plot leak for Frozen 2 where Elsa was now a wealthy businesswoman. It was ridiculous enough that I can believe it was true.

I would love it if they went full batshit like Nick Cave's Gladiator 2 script with Frozen 2.

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

by FactsAreUseless


Frozen 3 is the one that'll get really crazy because that's the one that's going to cross-over with Spider-Man.

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