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My Linux Rig
Mar 27, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 6 years!
look mister, I’ve been a professional pedestrian for 40 years (rarely getting into a car and walking in a major city) and what I can say is that the onus is on you to be savvy about traffic! you can’t just jump in front of cars and expect them to stop! and besides she said sorry for almost hitting you in a crosswalk!! you should just grow up and try being empathetic to both sides

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My Linux Rig
Mar 27, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 6 years!
I saw what looked like a suspicious man. He was standing across the street from a playground and looking at houses. We stopped up the street to where he was going, and that’s when he crossed the street to walk up a nearby trail. He was wearing a hoodie and a backpack, so we don’t know his hair color, what he looks like, or any identifying features

if you see this guy, be sure to call the cops!!! We think he’s casing houses!!!!!!!

My Linux Rig
Mar 27, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 6 years!
SUSPICIOUS VEHICLE

We saw a black car driving our our neighborhood and at one point it stopped, and the driver got out, knocked on my neighbors yard door and waited there for a few minutes. Then he came to my house, knocked on my door and that’s when I grabbed my gun and fired some warning shots at him!!! I got a good look at the car as they drove away, it had 3 men and 1 women in it.

IF ANYONE SEES THEM BE SURE TO NOTIFY THE AUTHORITIES

Marv Albert
May 15, 2003

LOST DOGS!!

Help! My babys escaped from my yard again. There really friendly dogs and will respond to the names Lola and Stich. They are not chipped. Can provide identifying information if U find them.





Pics of my babys.

Marv Albert fucked around with this message at 23:24 on Jan 9, 2019

CRIP EATIN BREAD
Jun 24, 2002

Hey stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time... Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T



Soiled Meat
there's a skunk coming in my back yard at night and 911 refuses to do anything about it!

Nut to Butt
Apr 13, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
I was hoping this would be more like craigslist

Nut to Butt
Apr 13, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Backdoor

Do it ironically
Jul 13, 2010

by Pragmatica
What? Yeah I know I walk heavy, no I’m not going to try to walk lighter it’s your fault living under me

lol but
Feb 24, 2007

body is a dinosaur
Slippery Tilde
is it over-familiar to talk to my kitty-corner neighbour? i'm gonna do like a half greeting i can play off as me monologuing my to do list in case i get blanked

Rod Hoofhearted
Jun 18, 2000

I am a ghost




HELP! My toilet is overflowing and it won't stop, and there's poo poo everywhere! I can't make it stop I need a PROFESSIONAL to come here RIGHT THIS MINUTE, and it can't be TOO EXPENSIVE.

I've got a half-eaten corndog and a handful of pocket lint for payment. PLEASE RESPOND NOW!!!

Rod Hoofhearted
Jun 18, 2000

I am a ghost






This is my dog, Fido. He's very loyal, sweet, loves to cuddle is great with kids!

I can't afford to keep him any more, so I'm taking him in to be put down.

Anyone who wants him, I'll accept no less than $600 for him.

If I don't have a buyer with cash in hand by Friday, I'll have him euthanized.

God Bless.

This is a slight exaggeration of a real post from someone in my area. :murder:

Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

I just heard loud booming noises on the corner of 12th and 22nd. Did anyone else hear them? Think they are gunshots?

mst4k
Apr 18, 2003

budlitemolaram

Spazzle posted:

I just heard loud booming noises on the corner of 12th and 22nd. Did anyone else hear them? Think they are gunshots?

I heard them too!! Has anyone called 911??

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.

i'm a woman

Linux Pirate
Apr 21, 2012


MYSTERIOUS DOG PATROL BIG WHEEL FOUND IN BACKYARD

someone has left a big wheel with the dog cartoon patrol characters on it in are backyard there are no children allowed this is a GATED SENIOR COMMUNITY if your grandchildren are visiting please FOLLOW THE RULES have them play ON YOUR DRIVEWAY and make sure they CLEAN UP there TOYS when they are DONE we do NOT WANT childrens TOYS in our BACKYARS i will be watching for kids for further DISTURBANCES. -Jim

Hardawn
Mar 15, 2004

Don't look at the sun, but rather what it illuminates
College Slice

never heard of her

Rod Hoofhearted
Jun 18, 2000

I am a ghost




LabyaMynora posted:

HELP! My toilet is overflowing and it won't stop, and there's poo poo everywhere! I can't make it stop I need a PROFESSIONAL to come here RIGHT THIS MINUTE, and it can't be TOO EXPENSIVE.

I've got a half-eaten corndog and a handful of pocket lint for payment. PLEASE RESPOND NOW!!!

HELLLOO!!?? NOBODY'S RESPONDED TO THIS POST! I NEED YOU HERE NOW!!! THERE'S LITERALLY 6 INCHES OF poo poo WATER COVERING THE ENTIRE FIRST FLOOR OF MY HOME!!!

Rod Hoofhearted
Jun 18, 2000

I am a ghost




This was literally just posted on Nextdoor near me:

"Looking for womans tap shoes size 8

please feel free to call me or text me at 312-XXX-XXXX. Thank you ."

Bobcats
Aug 5, 2004
Oh
Did anyone hear that suspicious music playing from that suspicious man’s car? Why are all these suspicious people moving into our neighborhood? Where are all the good neighbors going? Also ISO babysitter from a good family. If I talk more in code I’m going to die.

JEEVES420
Feb 16, 2005

The world is a mess... and I just need to rule it
Anyone else internet down right now?

lol but
Feb 24, 2007

body is a dinosaur
Slippery Tilde
a lot of people are going to tell you to waste money on poop knives like a northern yankee but you can lubricate with cooking oil and flush again

Rod Hoofhearted
Jun 18, 2000

I am a ghost




Hi! I'm Bobbi! I work for ATT! If you want great deals on ATT service, please send me a private message!


***one month later***

Hi! I'm Bobbi! I work for Metronet! If you want great deals on Metronet service, please send me a private message!

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
WHAT WERE THOSE SIRENS FOR WAS IT A SHOOTING


MY CHILDREN!!!!

jimmyjams
Jan 10, 2001


King Kong of Megadongs
Gobblin' them mega schlongs
Makin' sure they mega long
Stroke' 'em if they mega strong
used cock rings $10 ea OBO

Squidder
Mar 19, 2003

King of the Cat Tree

Oven Wrangler
WHO DO WE CALL ABOUT THE HOMELESS PEOPLE AT THE QUICKTRIP?!?!?

Why can't they get jobs!
As a Single Woman I don't feel safe!

lol but
Feb 24, 2007

body is a dinosaur
Slippery Tilde
as a future father

Drunk Nerds
Jan 25, 2011

Just close your eyes
Fun Shoe
Alert!! There have been several break-ins this week. One elderly woman had her medication stolen and another family had a break-in when no one was home but their six month old baby. Luckily nothing happened, this time.

I feel much better now that I've gotten my house wired by A&M home security. A&M has been a trusted company for over 60 years, and is a member of the Better Business Bureau. I suggest everyone do the same.

Pug Rodeo
Feb 20, 2007

BRING IT ON BRING IT ON YEAH


The undemocratic nature of the existing Neighborhood Associations (private corporations meddling in local government and purporting to speak for / instead of citizens, attendance requirements and probationary periods for a vote, lack of transparency and open meetings, etc) is self evident.  But a more pernicious threat is when the NAs are used as a convenient rubber stamp replacement for actual engagement with residents.  In attempting to gain some transparency in local permitting I have been submitting public records demands to several agencies for an event the City refuses to follow their own permit procedures for.  In so doing I discovered that in this case; the 2018 World Naked Bike Ride, the organizers were allowed to substitute the actual public notification requirements of the Parks and Rec permit application with a secret email to the Chair of the Cathedral Park Neighborhood Association with direction for her to keep it quiet.  I’m highlighting it here as this strikes at the whole concept of public notification and citizens’ rights to be aware of what is going on in their own government.  In this case instead of notifying those who would be impacted through the signs and public notification required by the permit process, Park and Rec allowed the organizers to instead only tell a single representative of a private corporation (IRS Form 990 available through Guidestar at https://www.guidestar.org/profile/47-4145876) in which only a handful of residents participate, and then embargo that information and call it “good enough”.  No concern for all other residents, no effort to actual inform the public, but instead a backroom deal to pretend at notification.  The real bad news?  Even though Parks and Rec colluded with the organizers to arrange this sham notification, PBOT didn’t even do that.  So all the other neighborhoods impacted by this event never even received the equivalent of this embargoed notice. 

The emails attached are a response to a public records request by Portland Parks and Recreation.  This particular email is on page 9 of the attached, however feel free to review the entirety to see Portland City employees discussing how they are going to keep a publicly permitted event secret from the public.

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
"ANOTHER CAR BREAK IN. This time I forgot to lock my car and had electronic equipment clearly visible in the backseat. This neighborhood is going downhill fast!!!!"

Bobcats
Aug 5, 2004
Oh
found neutered white male

jimmyjams
Jan 10, 2001


King Kong of Megadongs
Gobblin' them mega schlongs
Makin' sure they mega long
Stroke' 'em if they mega strong
to whoever is nutting in their wife at 3 am every morning with their windows open. please close your windows

Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

I’ve been having so much paranormal activity lately in my apt. What are your guys’ weirdest haunting stories in the neighborhood? I can’t be the only one!

Drunk Nerds
Jan 25, 2011

Just close your eyes
Fun Shoe

Chinatown posted:

"ANOTHER CAR BREAK IN. This time I forgot to lock my car and had electronic equipment clearly visible in the backseat. This neighborhood is going downhill fast!!!!"

Agreed. Here's a video of a man coming up to my peephole, knocking on my door, and then trying to open my window. Even though you can't see any identifying information, rest assured it is the property of me, Martha Johnson, I live at 123 broad street.

I feel so much safer now that I have A & M home security. We tried a big dog, but he ended up just stealing all of my pain medication. Best of all, A & M is having a special for free installation with a lifetime subscription! Such a great deal, I only wish everyone on the block had A & M

Dignity Van Houten
Jul 28, 2006

abcdefghijk
ELLAMENNO-P


I am looking for recommendations for pet sitters that will stay overnight in my home. There will be NO monetary compensation. I am in the West Haven area. They MUST be dependable, trustworthy, professional, well spoken, total animal lovers and come with recommendations that can be verified. These are not just my dogs that I want looked after they are my furry family members. Thank you in advance for your help.

Dignity Van Houten
Jul 28, 2006

abcdefghijk
ELLAMENNO-P


I am of need of cut firewood. Can anyone suggest a dependable and reliable person to deliver good wood. Pickup not an option. West Haven area, must provide references.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007



This is my kid, Fido. He's very loyal, sweet, loves to cuddle is great with dogs

I can't afford to keep him any more, so I'm taking him in to be put down.

Anyone who wants him, I'll accept no less than $600 for him.

If I don't have a buyer with cash in hand by Friday, I'll have him euthanized.

God Bless.

Dignity Van Houten
Jul 28, 2006

abcdefghijk
ELLAMENNO-P


[West Haven] Lock your cars and be alert. NO NOT let ANYONE into the community you don't recognize.
Purse, pearls stolen from car. I have reported this information to the police.

edit - maybe you've caught on I'm just copy pasting from my rich neighbors (I am also rich)

Molybdenum
Jun 25, 2007
Melting Point ~2622C
Asteroid Strike
About ten minutes ago, my husband just saw a giant asteroid, about the size of a basketball, fall from the sky. Did anyone else see this?

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ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

parvo outbreak at the dog park

Dear GOD. It's EVERYWHERE

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