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Mooey Cow
Jan 27, 2018

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Pillbug
Lately my phone has been all "My USB port is so moist right now, what are you gonna do about it? I sure hope you don't plug anything in there, that would be so bad"

Is it coming on to me? It sounds like it's coming on to me.

Any tech-savvy goons out there that can tell me how I can politely explain to it that I am not into phone sex?

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Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
Not sure OP

stuxracer
May 4, 2006

You need a StevePhone XS Max instead of that piece of garbage.

Gay Weed Dad
Jul 12, 2016

cool dude, flyin' high
OP I suggest you spend a bit less time worrying about "moist ports" and more time worrying about "noice posts" because this one sucks rear end

Prav
Oct 29, 2011

sounds like it needs you to insert a male connector, op

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

Gay Weed Dad posted:

OP I suggest you spend a bit less time worrying about "moist ports" and more time worrying about "noice posts" because this one sucks rear end

drat

a peck of pickled peckers
Aug 3, 2014

I am your Redeemer! It is by my hand that you arise from the ashes of this world!

Stopping looking at porn on your phone, OP

Hairy Right Hook
Sep 9, 2001

Hee to the ho
You call your mother with that phone?

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

gently caress THE PHONE

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019




Send it in for repair. That's when you send them a p-p-p-phone and hilarity ensues. Please don't post until then.

Tite Barnacle
Jun 4, 2014

Meowdy Purrdner

Grimey Drawer

SCROTO TURBOSPERG posted:

gently caress THE PHONE

Seconded. And don't worry op, I have no doubt you'll be able to fit in there, probably with room to spare

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Bronze Fonz posted:

Send it in for repair. That's when you send them a p-p-p-phone and hilarity ensues. Please don't post until then.

gently caress that. gently caress the phone

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
put the phone in a bag of rice overnight

might as well put your dick in as well while you're at it

wca
Mar 2, 2004

I'm a world-class assassin, fuckhead. How do you think I found out?
Most likely some sort of liquids went inside your charging port (water, soda etc) and now your getting that message. Unfortunately, that is considered a damage issue and you would have to go with your insurance if your phone plan has that.

Sorry OP.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

SCROTO TURBOSPERG posted:

gently caress THE PHONE

b

Mooey Cow
Jan 27, 2018

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Pillbug
After some consideration I have decided to take the phone out to dinner and explain that I'm not interested, but there will be NO loving.

ArchNemesis
Jun 27, 2007
College Slice
mine does that but its never even touched water, I think its the "throw me away and buy a new one" alarm

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
well i woke up this morning
felt around for my phone
yeah i woke up this morning
and i felt around for my phone, yeah
i ain't callin no-one
cause my phone's got moist ports

but it's all right (it's all right)
it's all right (it's all right)
repeat 8x
cause i got a landline

Vim Fuego
Jun 1, 2000

I LITERALLY SLEEP IN A RACING CAR. DO YOU?
p.s. ask me about my subscription mattress
Ultra Carp

Gay Weed Dad posted:

OP I suggest you spend a bit less time worrying about "moist ports" and more time worrying about "noice posts" because this one sucks rear end

Thought it would be cool to have a gay weed dad, but he just spends all day cheefin' on reefers & criticizing my SA posting

Best Bi Geek Squid
Mar 25, 2016
if you post about this in the yospos the nice posters there shoudl be able to help you

gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005
insert your 2.5mm connector

Brother Tadger
Feb 15, 2012

I'm accidentally a suicide bomber!

Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





Did you have sex with your phone yet op?

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
get a phone with a USB-D port OP


the D stands for Dick

neptuneL38
Jul 23, 2002

get some chuckas fucka

Mooey Cow posted:

Lately my phone has been all "My USB port is so moist right now, what are you gonna do about it? I sure hope you don't plug anything in there, that would be so bad"

Is it coming on to me? It sounds like it's coming on to me.

Any tech-savvy goons out there that can tell me how I can politely explain to it that I am not into phone sex?

lol

Nathilus
Apr 4, 2002

I alone can see through the media bias.

I'm also stupid on a scale that can only be measured in Reddits.
Do NOT stick your dick or the usb charger in when it says that you WILL fry the port.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Best Bi Geek Squid posted:

if you post about this in the yospos the nice posters there shoudl be able to help you

how are they going to help him gently caress the phone?

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018
MODS MAKE OP gently caress THE PHONE MAKE HIM

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO
Feb 28, 1985


Have you invalidated it's warranty yet?

counterfeitsaint
Feb 26, 2010

I'm a girl, and you're
gnomes, and it's like
what? Yikes.
Your phone sounds like a total slut OP

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

take your phone to a nice dinner and lay it out that you just want to be friends

cnut
May 3, 2016

I would "blow" into the "port", op.

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018

cnut posted:

I would "blow" into the "port", op.

you fool that just makes it more moist

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

[seductively] Bananaphone

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
First you'll need a dick to usb adaptor. Make sure you get the right kind of USB, and consider getting a male-to-male one for ease of use.

cnut
May 3, 2016

HugeGrossBurrito posted:

you fool that just makes it more moist

Or would it?!?!

Nicodemus Dumps
Jan 9, 2006

Just chillin' in the sink

Gay Weed Dad posted:

OP I suggest you spend a bit less time worrying about "moist ports" and more time worrying about "noice posts" because this one sucks rear end

In a perfect world this would have been the first and only reply before the thread was closed

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018

cnut posted:

Or would it?!?!

You have made me question every. The very foundations of my being.

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

gary oldmans diary posted:

insert your 2.5mm connector

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cnut
May 3, 2016

HugeGrossBurrito posted:

You have made me question every. The very foundations of my being.

:tipshat:

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