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Infidel Castro
Jun 8, 2010

Again and again
Your face reminds me of a bleak future
Despite the absence of hope
I give you this sacrifice




MEET YOUR 2019 MINNESOTA TWINS!


2018 Recap: 78-84, 2nd Place in the loving clownball division, a.k.a. the AL Central

The Twins surprised basically everyone in 2017 by making a late season surge and earning the final WC spot. The the universe reminded everyone in Twins Territory that the universe is a cold, uncaring place and that the concept of a kind and benevolent god is a delusion of the masses by making them play the New York goddamn motherfucking scourge upon modern society Yankees. We all know how that ended.

2018 saw a regression to the mean, as well knew even in 2017 the Twins were an average team. The biggest issue facing the team was the team's two most promising young players being sent down to the minors after apparently forgetting how to hit a baseball. This was only compounded by the fact that basically every free agent signing in the 2017-18 offseason flopped. Lance Lynn was shipped off for a bucket of Dubble Bubble and a signed photo of Rob Manfred. Logan Morrison was signed as a power threat and wound up with an OPS under .700 (though a lot of it was a terribly unlucky sub-.200 BABIP). Jake Odorizzi, while technically acquired via trade, was about the best move the Twins made, and he was average at best.

But let's not dwell on the past. Onto the future!

C - Jason Castro
.143/.257/.238, 1 HR, 3 RBI(19GP)

Injured for pretty much the entire 2018 season, causing the Twins to rely on Mitch Garver and Bobby Wilson most of the year. Castro isn't all that great, but he should provide excellent framing metrics while being average at everything else.

1B - C.J. Cron
.253/.323/.493, 30 HR, 74 RBI (140 GP w/TB)

After a pretty drat good season with Tampa Bay, the Rays rewarded Cron by...putting him on waivers. In desperate need of a 1B after Joe Mauer's retirement, they claimed Cron. Minnesota may have something of value from their latest dumpster diving excursion.

2B - Jonathan Schoop
.233/.266/.416, 21 HR, 61 RBI (131 GP w/BAL & MIL)

Schoop had an unbelievable year in 2017, earning himself an All-Star nod and even some AL MVP vote shares. 2018 saw him fall back down to earth with Baltimore. Milwaukee then traded for him at the deadline, where he immediately turned into liquid poo poo. Still, he's a good defender, only 26, and the Twins bought low on a 1-year deal hoping he can recapture some of that 2017 magic.

SS - Jorge Polanco
.288/.345/.427, 6 HR, 42 RBI (77GP)

Nailed for PEDs last offeason, Polanco sat for the first half of the 2018. Offensively he's quite good, though ideally he'd be playing 2B instead as his defense really isn't SS calibur. Recently signed a 5 year/$25.75m extension, so he's clearly in the team's long term plans.

3B - Miguel Sanó
.199/.281/.398, 13 HR, 41 RBI (71 GP)

Look, everyone know he's gonna strike out a lot. That's 21st century baseball for ya. But holy hell Miguel was horrid in 2018. Posting the 5th worst K% among players with 100 PAs or more at 38.5% (worse than even Joey Gallo), he eventually got sent down to the minors to fix his poo poo. Upon recall, he pretty much immediately got hurt. He's still got time to turn things around, but doubt is starting to creep in to the minds of Twins fans.
Note: Sano is going to miss the beginning of the season due to surgery thanks to a cut he suffered celebrating his Dominican League team's championship. He will likely be replaced to start the season by:

IF/OF - Marwin Gonzalez
.247/.324/.409, 16 HR, 68 RBI (145 GP w/HOU)

Positional flexibility is certainly an asset in high demand in modern MLB, and few players have more than Marwin Gonzalez. The only positions Gonzalez didn't appear at last year are pitcher and catcher. Given this flexibility and his decent power offensively, it's safe to say you'll see a lot of him even though he isn't pegged as a starter at a given position.

LF - Eddie Rosario
.288/.323/.479, 24 HR, 77 RBI (138 GP)

Without a doubt, Rosario was the Twins best offensive player last year. Once known to swing at anything within visual distance of the Hubble Space Telescope, Rosario finally learned a bit of patience back in 2017. A legit 30 HR threat, he also provides very good defence in the OF. Also it's a loving joke he didn't make the All-Star roster last year.

CF - Byron Buxton
.156/.183/.200, 0 HR, 4 RBI (28 GP)

Once a can't miss prospect, people are starting to worry if he might actually be a miss. Yes, he's probably the best defensive player in MLB. He's also the fastest baserunner in the league. His problem is he hasn't been able to stick in MLB due to his atrocious hitting so far. He shows flashes of greatness once in a while, but has never been able to sustain any offensive success. He's still only 25-years-old this season though, so panic really isn't warranted quite yet.

RF - Max Kepler
.224/.319/.408, 20 HR, 58 RBI (156 GP)

A defensively sound corner OF that can man CF in a jam, Kepler has been okay so far, I guess? He's still on the cusp of breaking 100 OPS+ and last year showed signs of finally figuring out how to not be a total liability vs LHP. The Twins think he's part of the long term solution though, as they just signed Max to a 5-year extension at a very reasonable price.

DH - Nelson Cruz
.256/.342/.509 (144 GP w/SEA)

The big offseason FA signing for Minnesota saw some desperately needed right handed power added to the starting lineup*. Despite being in his late 30's, Cruz hasn't shown any signs of slowing down. Maybe for once a Twins FA signing won't end in catastrophic disaster!
* Yes I am aware Sano is a right-handed power hitter, but hitting HRs requires actually making contact with the loving ball.

LA TORTUGA
C/IF Willians Astudillo - If he isn't your favourite baseball player on earth, there's something seriously loving wrong with you. He a short fat guy who never strikes out and well...
https://twitter.com/espn/status/1082870635125182464

https://twitter.com/WillRagatz/status/1040064216009531392


STARTING ROTATION

RHP Jose Berríos
12-11, 192.1 IP, 3.84 ERA, 1.144 WHIP

Berríos is tabbed as this year's opening day starter. He's also the best pitcher on the team. Those two things tend to go together. Yes, the rest of the staff isn't all that special talent-wise. Don't let that lead you to think he got the distinction of being the staff ace by default though. I mean, look at this poo poo and how much late break it gets:

gently caress.

RHP Kyle Gibson
10-13, 196.2IP, 3.62 ERA, 1.302 WHIP

While Gibson is by no means anyone's idea of a #1 or #2 starter, he basically pitched like on least year. Normally know for his Jekyll and Hyde level inconsistency, he seemed to be on his game more often than not last year. That said, if anyone on the staff last year illustrated that pitcher wins are a bullshit stat, it's Gibson. How he made it through the season without murdering the entire bullpen is beyond me. Case in point: Gibby took a no-hitter against the Yankees of all teams on April 26th. Even though he lost it in the 6th, he left the team in prime position to salvage at least one win from a four game series. Instead, the Bullpen blows a rare chance to overcome this team's kryptonite, eventaully giving up a walk-off 2-run HR for a Yankees sweep.

He'll probably regress a bit this year, but he's still a solid midde of the rotation type guy.

RHP Michael Pineda
Did not play in 2018 due to Tommy John Surgery

Look, all I know about him is he got paid to sit at home last year in hopes he'll be a decent pitcher this year and that he got caught using pine tar with New York and got a 10-game ban. Decent strikeout stuff despite rather pedestrian numbers with New York. Maybe the more pitcher-friendly Target Field will help.

RHP Jake Odorizzi
7-10, 164.1 IP, 4.49 ERA, 1.345 WHIP

Odorizzi was the only major acquisition the Twins made in the 2017-18 offseason that didn't completely blow up in their face. Even then, he wasn't all that spectacular. His career stats indicate he 's a better pitcher than last season leads on though, so a return to his old self would be a nice boon to a rather average pitching staff.
Also to note: He also almost no-hit the Yankees last year too (taking it into the 8th!), but at least the Twins won that game.

5th Starter: TBD
It's not uncommon for teams to figure out their final starter just before the season. In the Twins case, the top two candidates are LHP Adelberto Mejia, who pitched really well to begin the season before a season-ending nerve injury. He would also give the Twins a lefty starter option. The other top candidate is RHP Fernando Romero, though recent news indicates the team would prefer to use him out of the bullpen to maximize his velocity. Free agent signing LHP Martin Perez has starting experience, though his recent track record isn't all that encouraging and was essentially acquired as a buy-low lottery ticket. The last option with a realistic chance is top pitching prospect RHP Stephen Gonsalves, who struggled in his cup of coffee with Minnesota last year and is more likely to start the season in Rochester.

The other option is to utilize the opener strategy that seems to be all the rage these days, so who the gently caress knows?



Coming: Bullpen and Bench.

Infidel Castro fucked around with this message at 19:45 on Mar 9, 2019

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