|
Talks about how hard adulting is. Very proud of how good at adulting they are. Plays Clash of Clans constantly. Quotes Jar-Jar several times per hour. Asks you to pick them up some Taco Bell and has a crazy long order with tons of substitutions and additions. Works 26 hours per week but constantly burnt out and missing work. Plays Pokemon Go and wears the t-shirts. Somehow uses a full roll of toilet paper every time they use my bathroom.
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 01:03
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 09:09 |
|
|
refuses to share their flesh with you even though they clearly have more than enough
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 13:06
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 13:15
|
|
|
Stabs you in the neck with a fork
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 13:17
|
|
|
doesnt eat rear end
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 13:41
|
|
|
stabs your rear end in the neck with a fork
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 13:46
|
|
|
eats your neck with a fork whilst stabbing rear end
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 14:17
|
|
|
Stabbing forks with other forks
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 14:27
|
|
|
forks you in the rear end
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 15:03
|
|
|
hosed my wife
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:36
|
|
|
sandwiches_and_ham posted:
YA YA YA YA YA
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:39
|
|
|
Saving thwe lighter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBuIGBCF9jc
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:42
|
|
|
Does drugs Does all my drugs Never has their own drugs Steals Granny's drugs She's not even on anything cool! Stop snorting her blood pressure meds!!!
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:42
|
|
|
leaves fart stains on the sofa
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:45
|
|
|
Nobody controls me, except my Mom She kinda cares.
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:45
|
|
|
She only cares because you give good head
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:49
|
|
|
sometimes I wish, that I had, friend,
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:54
|
|
|
Watches Stephen crowder
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 16:55
|
|
|
Messages me all the time "are you okay, dude", "it's been two weeks, why aren't you coming to work?" blah blah blah Makes snide comments about the pile of beer cans in my apartment. I'M GOING TO TAKE THEM OUT SOON, WILLIAM! Wakes me up rudely because "I'd passed out in the snow". 
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 17:36
|
|
|
Has magic powers but never uses them to help me. Willfully helps imprison me. Makes light of my terrible fate.
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 18:48
|
|
|
Ben Smash posted:
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 18:50
|
|
|
Tucks her long long braid into my jeans and calls me her "lil mooshkin"
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 18:59
|
|
|
- vegan & cant shut the gently caress up about it. Yet is fat as gently caress & borderline alcoholic. - beer IPA douchebag drives a automatic Mustang. - hardcore Christian ex-druggie that got so low that he sold his rear end for drugs. When he found "the Jesus" he took his collection of records to a Christian camp burning. Included some of his dads Elvis Presley/Beatles singles that were worth crazy $$$$$.
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 21:31
|
|
|
steals ur lighters
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 21:37
|
|
|
BloodRed posted:steals ur lighters And is goddamn ciggie butt brain.
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 21:38
|
|
|
BloodRed posted:steals ur lighters this was so rampant in my circle of stoner friends that every time i'd buy a pack of bics i would use a soldering iron to write my name into the plastic. then when I run low I would declare a recall while we were all hanging out and have a half dozen of my own lighters returned
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 22:07
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 22:18
|
|
|
Demands the blood of MY newborn at every ritual even though she has a perfectly good one at home.
|
|
#
?
Feb 24, 2019 22:31
|
|
|
BloodRed posted:steals ur lighters signs your friend deserves to die screaming thread is that way
|
|
#
?
Feb 25, 2019 00:27
|
|
|
Gets mad at you for valiantly saving him from lung cancer or weed degeneracy by removing the lighter repeatedly. What a lovely addicted friend.
|
|
#
?
Feb 25, 2019 00:52
|
|
|
Just doesn't get that my rear end only takes TWO fingers, not three or more goddammit
|
|
#
?
Feb 25, 2019 02:21
|
|
|
pees on something you love
|
|
#
?
Feb 25, 2019 02:35
|
|
|
a mysterious cloak posted:Just doesn't get that my rear end only takes TWO fingers, not three or more goddammit Huh? You saving yourself for marriage?
|
|
#
?
Feb 25, 2019 02:35
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 09:09 |
|
|
Le me the rear end in a top hat friend
|
|
#
?
Feb 25, 2019 03:14
|
|