Lets Solve: The Decagon House Murders

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > Lets Solve: The Decagon House Murders

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

So yeah, I finally decided I'm doing this.

edit March 25: Chapter 1 done!!
edit April 6: Chapter 2 done!!
edit April 16: Chapter 3 done!!
edit April 26: Chapter 4 done!!
edit May 10: Chapter 5+6 done!!
edit May 12: Chapter 7 done!!
edit May 13: Chapter 8 done!!

September 23: Chapter 9 done!!

[adapted from japanese wikipedia]

quote:

"The Decagon House Murders" is Ayatsuji Yukito's debut mystery novel. It was published in 1987 and spawned many sequels collectively known as the "Mansion Series." The novel had an enormous impact on the Japanese mystery movement, giving rise to a shin-honkaku boom [this essentially means the contemporary fair-play mystery genre]. The influence is so great that the period after this novel was released is often referred to as the "post-Ayatsuji" period. It has sold over a million copies.

The length is apparently 290 print pages of Japanese (I'm using an ebook), which I'd estimate equals about an average length mystery. I got through between a third and half the novel before the amount of plot details and vital clues became so dense that I simply couldn't continue without going back and writing stuff down (I did make a crime-wall of sorts, but I wasn't nearly thorough enough and it quickly became too much to organize on one wall). But then I was like, if I'm gonna organize my thoughts, why not post them and share the mystery-solving fun with other goons?

Note: for reasons of personal opinion, I'm not gonna be using the English translation published by whatever I don't care enough to look up the publisher. Instead, I'm going to entirely retranslate the novel from scratch, and post that here in full, in addition to my "let's read" thoughts. Why? Well I really don't want to waste too much time in this thread ranting about how bad and disrespectful the official translation of this novel is. I'll type up a succinct summary of the problems in spoiler tags though for those who are wondering "Why bother?"

Ayatsuji's prose may be analytical, and mainly serves the purpose of providing clues, but it is also beautiful and has an amazing flow to it. And the translator absolutely demolishes any voice it had, in lieu of boringly stating the meaning of the sentences with no sense of flow whatsoever (though, granted, the rote meanings are correct most of the time). And the dialogue is even worse! Yes, Ayatsuji made the dialogue pretty analytical and it also mainly serves to provide more clues, but the characters have freakin' voices! Which, it seems to me, the translator didn't even try to adapt respectfully. I've legitimately cared for some of these characters over very minute, subtle characterizations, and when I open the English text to compare, it feels like he dropped them into a blender. A further problem is he uses such an obnoxious, pretentious vocabulary sometimes that clashes really hard with the bad prose and is just, bleh. I think he does it to sound more like Agatha Christie or something, but the Japanese text generally goes out of its way to be clear, so even if it wasn't a huge eyesore, using obsolete terms and poo poo just confuses the reader unnecessarily. I've legit read passages of the English text right after reading/understanding the same passage in Japanese and been like "what the gently caress does that even mean?"

But enough about the translation. I want this thread to be about the novel itself first and foremost, and the fun of solving a mystery!

SO, WHY SHOULD I PLAY ALONG?

If you're a fan of murder mystery stuff, chances are this book was written with you in mind. Heck, it seems like Ayatsuji was just like "Wow I really love all these Golden Age western mysteries I've been reading. Let me write a book that encapsulates everything I found fun about them."

The pacing of how details are given out (and repeated) feels very very deliberate, though at the same time extremely generous. With the exception of stuff that is concealed for super obvious reasons, I never felt like anything was being purposely glossed over. It honestly strikes the perfect balance between always giving a satisfying amount of new details in a given chapter, but never so much that the plot feels like a slog. When stuff needs further examination, it always comes at a really great time pacing-wise, in my opinion.

The characters generally discuss things very analytically, though again I'm gonna use the term "perfect balance" to describe how they still feel like real people despite very clearly acting as vessels to deliver clues to the reader. And they do so from the lens of mystery novels, so they'll often be discussing the exact theories that the reader would likely be having at that time. Which is understandably super fun!

The mystery itself is also quite convoluted in the best ways. There are a ton of moving parts, but the deliberate pacing makes it feel not so overwhelming. I just really really like the story so far (from my position of slightly less than halfway in). I have also heard that the solution is excellent. Though who's to say before we finish it? Answer: NOT ANY OF YOU, THAT'S FOR SURE. Which segues nicely into my rules...

Ground Rules:

Regarding spoilers
If you have read the novel before, or get intrigued by this thread and go read ahead in that crappy English translation, why am I assuming no one here reads Japanese? lol then honestly, you probably shouldn't post in this thread at all. Considering the genre, I'm sure you understand why even cheeky little "ohoho i see your theory" posts are toeing the line into spoilers. For the intent of this rule though, that still counts as spoilers. And obviously spoilers are strictly not allowed, not even in tags. Even stuff like "Indeed, the solution is good" posts will make me very nervous. And absolutely don't tell me the solution is bad, or any other adjective.

Acceptable posts from goons who have read ahead/finished this novel may include the following: pointing out a translation that is inconsistent with objective truth without saying why (though honestly i'd rather you just pm me that); also any kind of commentary that is entirely separate from anything close to theorizing. For example, "I really like character X because he's funny." Use common sense, guys. If you hate a character for reasons that haven't come up yet, or for reasons that get worse later, don't post about it.

Also, I'm fairly certain this won't apply to most of you, so I'm comfortable being annoying about it: if you at any point read or otherwise obtain knowledge about future events in this book, and you want to keep posting, I require you to disclose that.

Honor System
I obviously encourage theorizing, and yeah, maybe some people will be right. I am not going to get mad at you for being right. However, I am also highly aware that sometimes people who know stuff will pretend they don't, and post correct theories (read: spoilers) pretty much just for the sake of appearing smart and correct later. I implore you, DO NOT DO THAT.

~~~

Phew! But enough with the negativity! I'm going to end this by posting the relatively short prologue. I was originally planning to do chapter 1, part 1 also, because this is not very substantial, but this OP took a lot longer than I thought, so I don't have time right now. But I also don't want to wait before posting either. :v:

I think I want to put interstitial comments whenever I feel like sharing my thoughts, but for the prologue I don't really have any. I'll write my thoughts briefly at the end of it though. I actually translated this prologue a little bit ago as an exercise to compare with the "official" one, so this part isn't quite as "from scratch" as I advertised. Though I did heavily rewrite it in preparation for this post. Also, fun fact, it is exactly 1000 words. I didn't do it on purpose, but how insanely appropriate is it that it's 10x10 (x 10!) words, in the book about the 10-sided mansion?

quote:

Prologue

The night sea. A time of quiet.

Only the monotonous thrum of waves broke out from the endless dark, then faded away...

Seated on the cool concrete of the breakwater, adorned in the white vapors of his breath, a single man faced off against the oppressive darkness.

For untold months had he suffered. For untold weeks had he despaired. For untold days had the same thoughts plagued his mind. All leading to this very moment, where his determination was in the process of channeling into a specific, concrete course of action.

The plan was already in motion.

Preparations were nearly complete.

All he had to do next was simply wait for them to get caught in the trap.

However, he hadn�t for a second considered his plan to be flawless. In fact, rather than meticulous, he would be more inclined to describe it as, in a way, extremely sloppy. But in the first place, his intention had never been to form a plan that was perfect down to the last detail.

No matter how one squirms, Man will always be Man, and never a god.

The desire to become a god is easy to hold, but the fact of reality is, as long as Man is Man, that wish is impossible for even those possessed of amazing talents; he understood that.

For those who are not gods, how could the future-- governed as it is by human psychology and behaviors, to say nothing of random chance -- ever be predicted with perfect accuracy?

Even if we view all the world as a chessboard, with humans arranged as the pieces on top, there would still be a limit to how far one could read. And even if you have polished a plan down to the finest, most carefully constructed detail, you�d never know when, where, or how it could come crashing down. Predictions based on precise calculation can never be truly effective in a world overflowing with coincidence. A world overflowing with the whims of the heart....

Therefore, in this case, the most desirable plan was not one that foolishly limited his own actions, but one that allowed for constant adaptation, as open to flexibility as possible; such was the conclusion he'd come to.

He refused to be set in stone.

The important part wasn't the exact plotting, but the framework. And that framework must be flexible, always adjusting to the most optimal course of action based on circumstance.

After that, the plan would live or die by one�s own wit, cunning, and most of all, luck.

(I understand. Man can never be god.)

However, in a different way, he was undoubtedly about to take on the position of "god" himself.

Judgement. Yes, this was judgement.

He would judge them -- all of them -- in the name of revenge.

Judgement above the law.

As a mortal, he would never be forgiven; of that he was more than well aware. This was an act deemed "criminal" by society, and if caught, he would be the one facing judgement in the name of the law.

However, he was already beyond the point of controlling his emotions by way of such rational thinking. ----Emotions? No, this was not so shallow an affair. Far from it.

This was more than some fleeting passion.

It was now a screaming from his soul, his final tie to life, his very reason for existing.

The midnight sea. A time of silence.

He stared across the darkness where not even a single star nor light from departing ships were visible, and ruminated on his plan once more.

The preparation stage was nearing completion. Soon enough, they -- all his sinful prey -- would fall right into his trap. A trap equipped with ten equal sides and interior angles.

They would arrive knowing nothing. Harboring not an ounce of doubt nor fear, they would become their own arbiters of judgement, within their decagonal trap....

What awaited them, of course, was death. That was the appropriate sentence for each and every one of them.

Furthermore, there were to be absolutely no easy deaths. Eliminating everybody at once with an explosive, for example, would ordinarily be a far simpler and more reliable technique, but in this case such methods were not ideal.

He must kill them off one by one, in order. Indeed, just like the plot constructed by a certain famous British writer -- gradually, one at a time. That was how he�d make them learn. He�d show them the pain of death, the grief, the suffering, the fear.

From a certain perspective, he would certainly appear to have lost his mind. He could acknowledge that as well.

(I understand. No matter how I try to justify it, I am performing the actions of a lunatic.)

He casually shook his head at the sea, and at the black night pressing down upon it.

Concealed in his coat pocket, his hand felt something hard. He gripped it tightly, removed it, and held it in front of his face.

It was a small glass bottle, tinted green.

Inside the bottle, which was stopped up firmly with a cork, was everything he'd wrung out and collected from the recesses of his heart, packed to the brim with his own conscience, as some would call it. Countless sheets of folded paper were sealed inside. All the contents of this plan he had been arranging were diligently laid out on those pages in small print. Addressed to nowhere in particular, it was his letter of confession....

(I understand. Man can never be god.)

That was why; precisely because he understood that, he decided to entrust his own final judgement to those not of this world.

He was not concerned with whether the bottle would reach a shore. He merely intended to ask the sea -- from which all life springs forth -- whether, ultimately, he was right or wrong.

Wind began to blow.

The harsh chill stabbed at the back of his neck, making him shiver.

Calmly, he threw the bottle into darkness.

I usually dislike prologues, but this completely does the job of setting the stage for what's to come, in a very reserved length. I never really thought about it before, but I do tend to like prologues better when they're not much longer than a television cold-open would be. Still, it manages to establish a really bleak tone, which to me serves to make this man's feelings... somehow a little bit understandable, even though we don't have any real details about his motivations at all. It also introduces some pretty heavy themes right off the bat. I'd say this is an excellent example of Ayatsuji's ability to use words frugally, though it's actually some of his wordiest (meanderingest?) prose, lol.

Well, that's it for my intro. I hope this is something that people might be interested in. See you soon with the start of Chapter 1.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 19:54 on Sep 23, 2019

# ? Mar 16, 2019 10:39

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 25, 2024 21:49

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

Definitely up for this.
I like a good Japanese mystery novel, and I also like any time someone makes an effort to supplant a lackluster translation.

# ? Mar 16, 2019 11:04

Hieronymous Alloy: Jan 30, 2009; Why! Why!! Why must you refuse to accept that Dr. Hieronymous Alloy's Genetically Enhanced Cream Corn Is Superior to the Leading Brand on the Market!?!; Morbid Hound

Oh this looks like it's going to be fun. Wow.

# ? Mar 16, 2019 12:47

AFancyQuestionMark: Feb 19, 2017; Long time no see.

Oh, I am so in for this! :getin:

One slight concern though - OP is already translating a Japanese webcomic for GBS. I am afraid they might burn out.

# ? Mar 16, 2019 13:15

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

AFancyQuestionMark posted:

One slight concern though - OP is already translating a Japanese webcomic for GBS. I am afraid they might burn out.

I did consider this, but in all honesty, that webcomic takes practically zero effort lol. Maybe if someone takes me up on my offer to donate $1000 to Lowtax to make me post 600 panels in 2 weeks, I'd be worried. But I don't think anyone's gonna do that. But that's also why I didn't promise an explicit update schedule. Cuz in the past when I do that it tends to be... wrong. So I'll let my updates speak for themselves.

Side note: I'm starting Chapter 1-1 now. I haven't even typed one word of translation or commentary yet, so let's see how much effort this will be. (in all likelihood I'll post it tonight)

# ? Mar 17, 2019 03:00

Lord Zedd-Repulsa: Jul 21, 2007; Devour a good book.

I am not great with solving mysteries, but I love reading them in spite of, or maybe because of, that. I expect to mostly admire the prose but maybe predict a thing or two.

# ? Mar 17, 2019 03:22

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Lord Zedd-Repulsa posted:

I expect to mostly admire the prose

Oh that doesn't stress me out at all! It's not like I'm already competing with an extant translation or anything!

Quick note concerning the novel's title: honestly, I'd probably be a pedant and insist that the mansion be called something like "House of Ten Sides" or "Ten Sided House" because the pronunciation of it is stated (in furigana) to be slightly different than the actual way to pronounce the word for decagon. Well, technically it's not written the same way either, because the full word for decagon is [Ten] [Side] [Shape] More literally [Ten] [Point] [Shape], they technically count shapes by vertices rather than sides, but it's the same thing., while the name of the mansion is [Ten] [Side] [House]. BUT, from a cursory google search, it appears that the jpn collector's edition of the novel has the English title "The Decagon House Murders" on it, so whatever, I'm willing to concede that. Anyway...

quote:

Chapter One
First Day - Island

quote:

1

"I know it's been argued a hundred times, but still," said Ellery, a tall, slender young man with fair skin. "To me, mysteries are all-in-all a type of intellectual game. Using the novel as their playing field, it pits the reader against the detective, or maybe the reader against the author, in a stimulating game of logic. Nothing more and nothing less.

"That's why I'm sick of all this praise recently for realism and "social awareness" and so on. Like, an office lady gets murdered in her 1-bedroom apartment, the investigator wears out his soles looking for the culprit and in the end, it was her boss she was having an affair with; just stop it already. Tragedies based on modern society's vices, like corruption or political intrigue, should all be cancelled. What a real mystery should have, and you might call me old-fashioned but I don't care, is a great detective, a big mansion, a bunch of suspicious residents, a bloody tragedy, impossible crimes, and mind-boggling tricks... that's the literary ideal. Basically, if it's a world in which I can enjoy myself, that's fine. As long as it's all intellectual, that is."

Open ocean and gentle waves surrounded him. He was on a fishing boat, with an engine that sputtered worryingly and smelled of oil.

I do want to keep discussion of translation to a minimum and basically pretend that this is a normal let's read, but it's probably going to be inevitable and I just want to mention the original first line cuz I really like the imagery, but couldn't make it sound not weird in English. He basically said that it was an "argument with mold growing on it" aka a "moldy argument". I thought that was too weird to open with, but I can always edit it in if y'all think it's better.

quote:

"That kinda pisses me off." Sitting on the side of the boat, Carr threw out his prominent chin and twisted his mouth into a frown. "I don't like it, Ellery. All your intellectualism crap. I'm fine with treating some mysteries as games, but listening to you preach intellectualism at every turn, it rubs me the wrong way."

"Well that's unfortunate."

"It's elitist. Not every reader is gonna have the same idea of what's intellectual as you do."

"You're right." Ellery fixed his undeterred gaze on Carr. "It's something I've always found tragic. You can feel it just from walking around campus every day. Even in our very own club, there's no guarantee that everyone will be intellectual. Some people are just challenged."

"You lookin' for a fight?"

"My word," Ellery said dismissively. "Nobody said anything about you. Besides, what I meant by "intellectual" is just the attitude with which we approach the game. It doesn't matter if you're smart or dumb. There is no human on the planet who lacks intellect. And in the same way, there's no human who doesn't know how to have fun. So what I'm trying to articulate is, it's a matter of whether you have the mental brain-space to play intellectually."

"Hmph," Carr snorted and sneered as he turned away.

Ellery, with a subtle smile on his lips, turned to face the small young man standing next to him, whose smooth face was adorned with circular glasses. "And so therefore, Leroux, if we view mysteries as a unified world built around a singular methodology all for the sake of the intellectual sport, we can then conclude that the present time we live in is an extremely difficult period in which to achieve that."

"Hmm." Leroux inclined his head slightly.

Ellery continued, "This is also a tired argument though. But still, what with the incredible industriousness of investigators, a stable organizational structure, and the latest forensic techniques available... the police nowadays are in no way incompetent. In fact, they're altogether too competent. In the quest for truth, there is no longer a place for the traditional great detective, grey matter as their only weapon, to flourish. Even if Mr. Holmes himself showed up in a modern city, people would probably laugh him off the streets."

"That's going a bit far. It would be a modern Holmes equivalent that shows up today."

"True. Of course. Perhaps he'd burst onto the scene with all the cutting edge knowledge from the field of forensic science in his back pocket. And he'd have to explain it all to poor old Watson. He'd list off all kinds of obtuse technical terms and mathematical formulae that the reader is sure to not understand. This is quite obvious, my dear Watson. Did you not know this, my dear Watson?"

Hands deep in the pockets of his tan trenchcoat, Ellery gave a light dismissive shrug. "That was an exaggeration, but my point is the same. When there's a police force whose boorishness knows no bounds, making use of Golden Age detectives who only appear to use exquisite "logic" and "deduction" when in the end forensic technology saves the day, I just don't feel like clapping. Authors writing detective fiction that takes place in the modern day, without exception, fall into that trap.

"So a speedy-- or maybe that's misleading, but an effective plan to resolve that dilemma, would be what I was talking about before, an analysis of the "stormy villa" pattern."

"I see." Leroux nodded seriously. "So the subject of the modern fair-play mystery should be the stormy villa. That's what you're saying?"

It was nearing the end of March. Despite being almost spring, the wind blowing over the sea was still cold.

Sticking out from the east coast of Oita Prefecture in Kyushu, are S Peninsula and J Cape. They had departed from a rustic harbor in S Town near there, and the boat's wake now pointed toward the barely-visible J Cape. Their destination was a small island about five kilometers seaward.

The weather could not have been more flawless. Although, due to the dust flurries common for spring in this region, the sky appeared more white than blue. The sun's rays, which formed a blurred haze in the sky, struck the waves and became silver scales. Enveloped in the veil blown in from the distant shore, the environs appeared misty.

"I don't see any other boats," said the burly young man leaning on the opposite side of the boat from Ellery and the others, who had been silently smoking a cigarette until now. He was in need of a haircut and a comb, and the lower half of his face was covered by a dark beard-- This was Poe.

"The currents're strong towards the island. Most boats'll avoid it," the cheery old fisherman responded. "The fishing spots for this area are way further south. Comin' towards the island from here, you won't see many boats. --Speakin' of, you sure are a strange lot of students."

"Oh? Is that so?"

"In the first place, your names're weird. I've been listenin' a little, and I've only heard stuff like Leroo and Elery and stuff. You must be the same, yeah?"

"Yeah. Well, they're basically nicknames, I guess."

"Do the university kids these days all use names like that?"

"No. That's not what I meant."

"Ah, then you lot are strange."

Near where Poe and the fisherman were standing, a long wooden box was set towards the center of the boat; currently using it as a bench were two young women. Including the fisherman's son grasping the rudder at the back, the boat's passengers numbered eight.

Excepting the fisherman and his son, the other six were all students at K University in O City in Oita Prefecture, and members of the mystery club. Hence, the names Ellery and Carr and such were, as Poe stated, a sort of nickname used between members.

Explaining this outright may be in bad taste, but naturally, the nicknames originated from Ellery Queen, John Dickson Carr, Gaston Leroux, and Edgar Allen Poe -- western mystery novelists who deserved great respect. The two women were called Agatha and Orczy. Surely it doesn't need to be said that these were taken from Agatha Christie and Baroness Orczy.

"Hey, take a look, children. You can almost see the mansion up on Horned Island," the fisherman raised his hoarse voice. The six young men and women simultaneously turned their eyes toward the island coming into view up ahead.

It was a small, flat island. Cliffs rose from the sea almost vertically, and dark greenery covered the top. It almost looked as if a stack of copper coins were floating on the sea. From the front, they could see three points that jutted out slightly; perhaps those were once likened to horns, hence the name Horned Island.

This island with sheer cliffs on every side had only a single inlet, which the small fishing boat could barely squeeze into. Because of that, there had never been even a stray curious fisher who'd thought to pay a visit. More than twenty years ago, a bizarre building called Blue Mansion was built on this island, and people had lived there, but now it was once again a true uninhabited island.

"Um, I think I can barely see it at the top of the cliff," Agatha spoke up, standing from the wooden box. She brushed back her long wavy hair which had become disheveled from the wind, and grinned broadly.

"You got it. That's what's left after the fire. The main building completely burned down, I'm afraid," the fisherman explained loudly.

"Hmm, so that's Decagon House, huh? ---So hey," Ellery got the attention of the fisherman. "Have you ever been up there?"

"I've come into this bay to avoid the wind many a time, but I've never been up there, no. Besides, I don't wanna come so close to where that incident happened. You all be careful now too."

"Careful of what?" Agatha turned to ask.

The fisherman's voice got one notch quieter. "This island is where it appears."

Agatha and Ellery shared a knowing glance for an instant.

"The ghost. Ya know, they say it's that Nakamura guy who got killed." The wrinkles deeply etched into the fisherman's dark-skinned face slowly distorted, then seemed to vanish, into a wide smile. "That's what I've heard, at least. On rainy days or whatever, passing ships supposedly see a white figure just standing there on the cliff. That's Nakamura So-and-so's ghost beckoning you, apparently. Besides that, they also report seeing lights where no one should have been, or a disembodied soul wandering the ruins, or that the ghost sinks ships that get too close."

"Don't waste your breath, man," Ellery said, barely concealing a chuckle. "It's no use. The more you try to scare us, the more excited we'll get."

In truth, the only one among the six to become very slightly afraid was the one still sitting on the wooden box, Orczy. Agatha seemed entirely unperturbed. Quite to the contrary, she was murmuring "awesome, awesome" under her breath as she flew towards the tail end of the boat.

"Hey hey, is it true? What he just said?" She faced the fisherman's son -- a boy with some innocence left in him -- and interrogated him in high spirits.

"It's made up." After glancing up at Agatha, then averting his gaze as if from the sun, the boy answered curtly. "I heard the rumors too, but I've never seen it in real life."

"Dang. Really?" A shade of disappointment crossed Agatha's face, but quickly became a teasing smile. "But it'll be cool if a ghost does show up though," she said. "After all, it is the place where that incident happened."

Wednesday, March twenty sixth, Nineteen eighty six. Just past eleven in the morning.

Okay so I didn't want to break up the flow of this scene with too much commentary, so I'll say it here.

First of all, oof! I was sick today but I powered through to translate this all in one sitting. But that probably didn't affect me too much. And I'm sure that once I get an ear for the style of this in English, as well as, you know, typing in the SA box, I'll get faster. No way am I doing this every day though lol. Ideally, I'll do a bit each day for a comfortable several updates a week, but all I'll say for now is that if I don't update for a week then I'll make myself post no matter what. Like, I'll do what I did today. Honestly, the existence of a full translation available to you is a huge motivating factor in, like, not boring you guys. It's also a motivating factor to write good, but... heh, we'll see what you think I guess. Also, I practically didn't edit this once I finished, because I am very exhausted, so PM me about any errors (if you care that much lol) and I'll fix em. Also also, just as a side note, I've found that the chapter sections are pretty much all equally long. Like, it's really good at consistent lengths I think. So we won't have to worry about one being ridiculously long or disappointingly short or anything.

Translation notes in spoiler tags just cuz I want to distance myself from "admitting" that this is my translation, heh...

Horned Island: Tsunojima. It's probably obvious why I chose to translate the island's name, since they almost immediately reference the meaning of the name in the text. Something I feel it's important to say though is that the first part of the name is the same as the center character in the word for decagon, as well at the name of the building.
Blue Mansion: Ao Yashiki. Well, this was an obvious choice because the building has such an obvious translation that sounds perfectly fine. But for completion's sake I want to make the real pronunciation of proper names available to you guys.

So! Since we were just whirlwind introduced to a bunch of characters, let's talk about them!

Ellery in particular is very fun to ~~translate~~ read, personally (and he was half the loving words in this post lol). He's just such a lovable little poo poo. I half to wonder how much of his spiel is just directly from the author's mouth, basically, and how much is exaggerated because Ellery is a pompous poo poo.

I like how Orczy is literally only characterized so far by a single throwaway line about being, I guess more skittish than the others? I mean, it's only fair. If you don't say anything, how can you expect the text to devote words to you?

Well actually, Carr isn't characterized much more than Orczy is. btw I hope I get faster at typing Orczy's name soon Like, he's kind of just... offended at Ellery. And crude. Despite the fact that he said like maybe 10 words to Ellery, I think their dynamic is funny. And can I mention that I love when Carr starts ignoring Ellery and Ellery just turns to Leroux and keeps talking without missing a beat?

Speaking of Leroux, well he has glasses. That's his character. No but seriously, at least we also know he gets along with Ellery.

Agatha kind of seems like your stereotypical energetic tomboy.

Poe, well, he smokes and he's pretty chill. His interaction with the fisherman is priceless, lol. He kind of reminds me of Kiryuu from the Yakuza series in a way... like, in the way he's very straight-forward in his answers and sets the fisherman up for a joke.

Fisherman is literally a cookie-cutter Japanese fisherman, and his son barely had any screentime but he seems angsty.

Veeeeerry broad strokes characterization at this point. Which I think is perfectly okay! To be honest, I feel like the six named characters have at the very least been thoroughly differentiated from each other, which is really valuable right away. And really, their only purpose is to be suspects anyway right? :v:

Another thing I like about this "chapter" is how it chunks up the little scenes without needing to do an asterisk break or whatever. We're kind of taken physically around the boat to the different conversations.

Ok wow I probably have more to say but I am very tired so I will add more later if I think of it. I'd love to hear your thoughts on anything tho! I live for feedback so tell me I'm great and I'll probably post more lol.

edit: Oh yeah I also think it's hilarious how they keep referring to that incident because it's like, of loving course there's a mysterious incident. It's so par for the course that let's not even dwell on the supposed drama of it.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 12:03 on Mar 25, 2019

# ? Mar 17, 2019 09:47

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

onsetOutsider posted:

I just want to mention the original first line cuz I really like the imagery, but couldn't make it sound not weird in English. He basically said that it was an "argument with mold growing on it" aka a "moldy argument". I thought that was too weird to open with, but I can always edit it in if y'all think it's better.

"I know it's a stale old argument" is what I'd have gone with.

onsetOutsider posted:

Ellery, with a subtle smile on his lips, turned to face the small young man standing next to him; circular glasses adorned his smooth face.

The way this sentence is structured implied to me at first that the glasses are worn by Ellery, but I assume it's actually Leroux, in which case I'd probably change it to:
"Ellery, with a subtle smile on his lips, turned to face the small young man standing next to him, whose smooth face was adorned with circular glasses."

onsetOutsider posted:

He'd list off all kinds of obtuse technical terms and mathematical formulas that the reader is sure to not understand.

Given the voice you've assigned to Ellery, that should probably be the proper "formulae".

onsetOutsider posted:

More than twenty years ago, a bizarre building called Blue Mansion was built on this island, and people lived there, but now it was once again a true uninhabited island.

"and people lived there" feels like the wrong tense for this -- I'd go with "and people had lived there"

---

Other than that pedantic nitpicking, this was all pretty good, and I'm definitely looking forward to seeing where it goes, and what that incident was.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 11:30

anilEhilated: Feb 17, 2014; But I say fuck the rain.; Grimey Drawer

The naming is interesting; they're obviously named after mystery writers but I can't for the life of me connect Emma Orczy with the genre. Significant or have I just missed a book somewhere?
e: Never mind, she apparently wrote the Old Man in the Corner stories. My bad!

e: It would be pretty funny if Ellery turned out to be two people, though.

anilEhilated fucked around with this message at 17:52 on Mar 18, 2019

# ? Mar 18, 2019 17:48

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

@white crane

I made pretty much all your suggested edits. Thanks a bunch for helping out.
Also, re: the "Ellery wearing glasses" thing, gosh darn it! That's exactly why I used a semicolon instead of a comma in that sentence! I guess it wasn't enough lol.

(also expect an update in an hour or two)

# ? Mar 19, 2019 04:34

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

quote:

2

The inlet was located on the island's west coast.

Cliffs towered on either side. The right-hand side was a particularly steep rock face, such that the entire southern edge of the island formed a nearly twenty meter vertical drop. As for the eastern edge with its violent waters, the cliffs reached about fifty meters high.

Directly ahead, the rock formed a slope worthy of being called a cliff as well. Among the rocks and some small smatterings of dark-green shrubbery was carved a thin flight of stairs in a zig-zag pattern, creeping its way to the top.

The boat slowly approached the area.

Though the inlet was narrow, the waves were indeed calmer than before. The color of the water was different as well. A hauntingly deep green.

To the left was a wooden pier. Further in, they could see a decrepit boathouse.

"Are you guys sure you don't want me to come check on you, even once? The phones're dead here, ya know." After the six stepped onto the dock, which was creaking a concerning amount, the fisherman followed after them.

"We'll be fine," Ellery answered, putting a hand on the shoulder of the hairy man beside him -- Poe -- who was sitting on his cheap backpack smoking a cigarette. "We've got our very own doctor-in-training right here."

Poe was a fourth year medical student.

"Yeah. What Ellery said," Agatha chimed in. "Besides, we came all this way to stay on an uninhabited island, so it'd totally ruin the mood with you checking in on us."

"You've got spunk, kid." The fisherman gave a toothy grin as he undid the ropes fastened to a stake on the pier. "Then I'll come back on Tuesday of next week, around ten. Be careful, now."

"Thanks. We will. Especially of ghosts."

＊ I guess I'll break the quote tag like this for storybreaks, I think it looks good.

quote:

Upon reaching the top of the long, steep stairs, their field of vision instantly widened. With a field that had been thoroughly wrecked by the elements as its front lawn, a single-story building with white walls and a blue roof stood there as if waiting for them.

Directly facing the stairs was the entrance, a double-door painted blue. Several small steps lead a small ways up to the door.

"So this is Decagon House, eh?" Ellery was the first to speak, though still breathless from the climb. He set down his camel Boston bag where he stood and gazed at the sky for a moment. "What're your thoughts, Agatha?"

"It's surprisingly nice." Agatha dabbed her pale forehead with a cloth.

"I think it's... well... what I'm trying to say is..." Leroux was gasping for air as well. His hands were full of luggage, both his and Agatha's. "I was hoping it'd feel more... I don't know... depressing."

"Yeah man, it's never what you expect. Anyway, let's go inside. Van was... supposed to be here by now. I wonder where he's at," said Ellery, having caught his breath and picked up his bag, and in practically the exact same moment, the shutters of the window directly left of the entrance flung open, and a young man stuck his head out.

"Woah, you're here!" And with that, the seventh member of this week-long island stay, Van, appeared. Of course, that name originated from S. S. Van Dyne, father of Philo Vance. "One sec. I'm coming," he said in a weirdly hoarse voice, and closed the shutters. A short time later, he emerged from the entrance at a trot.

"Sorry about not welcoming you properly. I've had a small cold since yesterday... I felt feverish so I was resting. I tried to listen for the boat, but yeah."

He had come to the island slightly in advance in order to make various preparations.

"You're sick? Are you okay?" Leroux seemed concerned as he rubbed sweat off his glasses.

"I wish I could say yes." His lank body quivered visibly as he gave an uneasy smile.

＊

quote:

Van lead the group through the entrance of Decagon House.

Past the blue double-doors was a spacious entrance hall --- or so it seemed, but it quickly became apparent that the spaciousness was an illusion. In reality, there wasn't all that much space. It was only because the room was not rectangular in shape that it appeared that way.

There was another pair of double-doors at the end of the room, but upon closer inspection the interior wall was rather narrower than the entrance. In other words, the entrance hall could be described as a trapezoid that got narrower towards the building's center.

The six besides Van exchanged confused glances at this bizarre construction that distorted one's sense of distance, but once they'd stepped through the doors into the central hall, those glances turned to nods of understanding. That was because they were now surrounded by ten walls of equal width, in a decagon-shaped room.

In order to better understand the structure of this building called Decagon House, perhaps it would be best to lay out a basic floorplan.

The distinguishing feature of Decagon house was, as the name suggested, the decagonal shape of its outer wall --- moreover, it was a perfect decagon. And within that large decagon was inlaid a smaller decagon, the main hall, with straight lines connecting each of their respective vertices and forming ten distinct blocks. Put differently, the mathematically perfect decagon of the main hall was surrounded by ten isosceles trapezoid rooms. And one of those trapezoids was the entrance hall they'd just passed through.

"Well? Pretty weird, right?" Van turned to face the rest. "Those doors opposite the entrance hall go to the kitchen. The door to the left of that is for the bathrooms. And the other seven are guestrooms."

"A decagon building with a decagon hall." Ellery turned to look at every wall of the room as he made his way to the large table at the center. He poked the edge of the table, which was painted white. "And this is a decagon too. I'm surprised. That Nakamura Seiji who got killed, you think he had OCD or something?"

"Probably," Leroux responded. "The main house that burned down, Blue Mansion, I heard that everything from the floor to the ceiling to the furniture was all covered in blue."

The man who, over twenty years ago, had built Blue Mansion on this island and then moved into it --- His name was Nakamura Seiji. Naturally, the one who built the subsidiary building Decagon House was the same Nakamura Seiji.

"But wait..." Agatha said to no one in particular. "How are we supposed to tell the rooms apart?"

The doors to the entrance hall and the kitchen, opposite each other, were both plain wooden double-doors with textured glass around the frames in identical designs. When they were both closed, it was impossible to tell one from the other. Additionally, the four doors on each side were all made of the same wood and were difficult to distinguish from one another. Since the main hall had no furniture that could be used as a landmark, Agatha's concern was quite justified.

"Good point. I almost went in the wrong door a bunch of times since this morning." Van laughed bitterly. Perhaps because of the fever, his double-eyelids were slightly puffy. "I think it'll be fine if we make nameplates and put them on the doors. Orzcy, you brought your sketchbook, right?"

Startled at hearing her name so suddenly, Orczy raised her head meekly.

She was a short girl. Possibly due to insecurity over her chubby physique, she wore primarily dark-toned clothing, which instead made her look all the more dull. As a stark contrast to Agatha's natural charisma, Orczy's timid eyes were always focused on the ground. However, she found a use for herself in her hobby of traditional Japanese painting.

"Ah, yes. I brought it. Should I get it out?"

"Nah, we'll do it later. So anyway, everyone pick your rooms. They're all the same, so don't fight over it. I went ahead and chose this one for myself," Van said, indicating one of the doors.

"I made sure to supply the necessities. Keys are in the keyholes."

"Alright. Sweet," Ellery responded enthusiastically. "Let's rest for a bit and then explore the island."

TL notes in spoiler tags!
Nakamura Seiji This name is altogether very normal, but it's worth noting that it contains the symbol for "blue". HMMMM. If I was going to localize the names like I'm 4kids or something, I think I'd call him Nick Blueford. Lol maybe I'll do that for all the names in the future. It's fun.

There's a lot here that makes me highly suspicious -- not of the characters -- but of what kind of tricks the author is expecting to pull with these details about the house's layout. And I love how the kids are tempting fate with that whole "don't come back for a week" thing. Place bets on who's gonna die first :smuggo:

Umm also stuff about Orczy! Eyy

Ok I really want to say more words about substantial stuff, so that it looks like I'm justifying the let's read, but I really just want to get this update out so I can go watch youtube or something :v:

Please discuss. I'll be obsessively refreshing my bookmarks.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 02:31 on May 11, 2019

# ? Mar 19, 2019 05:42

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

Your prose is better in this one, IMO. Only one minor nitpick:

onsetOutsider posted:

"We'll be fine," Ellery answered, putting a hand on Poe's shoulder, who was sitting on his cheap backpack smoking a cigarette.

I don't know if this is technically incorrect, and it's not really ambiguous, but to me that "putting a hand on Poe's shoulder, who was sitting on his cheap backpack" feels very unnatural, largely because the "who" directly follows the noun "shoulder" rather than the name "Poe", which isn't a natural way of phrasing things in English.
I assume it's a byproduct of the Japanese syntax? It's been a long time since I studied Japanese, and I never did learn much.
I'd have rendered it as "putting a hand on the shoulder of Poe, who was sitting on his cheap backpack"

Now:
Here's a floorplan of Decagon House as we know it:

We should also remember that Van peered out of the room to the left of the entrance hall, so that is probably his bedroom, but it's worth noting that when he says "I went ahead and chose this one for myself" he merely "indicates one of the doors", and we don't get confirmation that it's the same one he peered out of.
Also worth noting that as far as we know, anyone wanting to use the bathroom will have to pass through the main hall.

# ? Mar 19, 2019 12:27

AFancyQuestionMark: Feb 19, 2017; Long time no see.

Calling it now, someone is going to invite a victim into their room, murder them and then switch around the nameplates so it would seem like the victim was killed in another room.

# ? Mar 19, 2019 12:34

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

AFancyQuestionMark posted:

Calling it now, someone is going to invite a victim into their room, murder them and then switch around the nameplates so it would seem like the victim was killed in another room.

This would only work until someone tries to leave the building lol.

But I am just as suspicious as you over those nameplates.You (as an author) don't just do something like that for no reason.

edit: @white crane

I was actually wary of that line myself but I thought that "shoulder of Poe" would be just as awkward. If I was wrong about that then I'm happy to change it.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 14:51 on Mar 19, 2019

# ? Mar 19, 2019 13:33

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

Honestly they both sound a little awkward, but I'm not sure there's a way around it without more substantial rephrasing than you might want to do.

quote:

"Are you guys sure you don't want me to come check on you, even once? The phones're dead here, ya know." After the six stepped onto the dock, which was creaking a concerning amount, the fisherman followed after them.

"We'll be fine," Ellery answered, putting a hand on Poe's shoulder, who was sitting on his cheap backpack smoking a cigarette. "We've got our very own doctor-in-training right here."

Poe, the hairy man Ellery had indicated, was a fourth year medical student.

I mean, I'm obviously just going on your translation and not referring to the original text, but I'd probably have written that passage more like this:

quote:

The six of them stepped onto the dock, which creaked in a concerning manner. The fisherman followed after them. "Are you guys sure you don't want me to come check on you, even once? The phones're dead here, ya know."

"We'll be fine." Ellery put a hand on the shoulder of the hairy man beside him, who had taken a seat on his cheap backpack and was smoking a cigarette. "Poe here is a fourth-year medical student, so we've got our very own doctor-in-training!"

That's a much more liberal edit of the prose, obviously, but it conveys all the same information without really changing anything, save only that it might be considered to change Ellery's characterisation slightly, since he now actually gives the fisherman Poe's name which he didn't originally. It does also avoid the redundancy of having "putting a hand on Poe's shoulder" followed immediately by "Poe, the hairy man Ellery had indicated", which I think improves the flow.

The_White_Crane fucked around with this message at 14:13 on Mar 19, 2019

# ? Mar 19, 2019 14:11

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Yeah, your first example is good, and I think the only reason I didn't do it before is I'm self-conscious about any time I'm writing too many words for a relatively compact jpn sentence. It's a concern I should kick cuz there's nothing inherently wrong with that.

I'm less inclined to do stuff like your second example, just cuz there's a distinct implication (I feel) that anything said in the narration can be taken as unequivical truth, whereas dialogue is just, you know, what someone said. That's also why I need to make sure I'm keeping stuff that's like, guessing about Orczy's motivations for wearing dark clothing, instead of stating for 100% fact that she is insecure of her weight.

edit: wait lmao your first quote didnt change it at all. I'm actually dumb

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 14:26 on Mar 19, 2019

# ? Mar 19, 2019 14:21

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

quote:

"Are you guys sure you don't want me to come check on you, even once? The phones're dead here, ya know." After the six stepped onto the dock, which was creaking a concerning amount, the fisherman followed after them.

"We'll be fine," Ellery answered, putting a hand on the shoulder of the hairy man beside him -- Poe -- who was sitting on his cheap backpack smoking a cigarette. "We've got our very own doctor-in-training right here."

Poe was a fourth year medical student.

I think this is a good compromise.

# ? Mar 19, 2019 14:44

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

onsetOutsider posted:

I'm less inclined to do stuff like your second example, just cuz there's a distinct implication (I feel) that anything said in the narration can be taken as unequivical truth, whereas dialogue is just, you know, what someone said. That's also why I need to make sure I'm keeping stuff that's like, guessing about Orczy's motivations for wearing dark clothing, instead of stating for 100% fact that she is insecure of her weight.

Yeah, I get that. I actually didn't think about that aspect of shifting the description of Poe's background from narration to dialogue, which was careless of me.

I can especially understand you wanting to be conservative when it's a Fair Play Mystery, too, because that's a genre where it's especially important to make sure you don't introduce ambiguity or false clues to the reader.
To some extent it's also a philosophical thing when it come to translation, wherever you personally think the balance lies between precisely converting the source text versus interpreting it into smooth prose in the target language.

Edit: Yeah, your new version is much better. It's still a bit weird having that isolated "Poe was a fourth year medical student." floating there like that, but it's important information and you're right that it needs to be kept in narration.

# ? Mar 19, 2019 14:45

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

quote:

3

Before long, rooms were assigned.

Proceeding left from the entrance hall were Van, Orczy, and Poe, and from the right, Ellery, Agatha, Carr, and Leroux.
(Refer to Fig.1 "Floorplan of Decagon House")

Once the six others had disappeared with their luggage into their respective rooms, Van leaned against the door to his room, pulled out a Seven Star from the pocket of his ivory down vest, and held it in his mouth. Then he looked over the dim decagonal hall once again.

The walls were white plaster. The floor was covered in large blue tiles, and seemed to be designed for wearing shoes inside. The ceiling, which was vaulted diagonally from all ten sides, terminated with a decagon skylight in the center, the light from which poured past the rafters and onto the white decagon table. Around the table were ten wooden chairs draped in blue cloth. Excluding the spherical light fixture suspended from the rafters like a pendulum, there were no other furnishings.

The electricity was disconnected. The room was illuminated solely by natural light from the skylight. For that reason, even at midday an insidious gloom roamed inexplicably.

Soon, Poe lumbered out of his room wearing faded jeans and an aqua shirt.

"Oh, that was fast. ---Wait, I'll brew some coffee." Van headed towards the kitchen, half-smoked cigarette between his fingers. He was currently a third year student in the science department. By that count, he would be one year younger than Poe, who was in his fourth year studying medicine.

"Thanks. ---So it must've been a lot of trouble bringing up all the blankets and everything."

"Oh, not at all. I had help from the movers."

At that moment, Agatha left her room with her long hair done up in a scarf. "Nicely done, Van. I thought the room would be way grodier. ---Did I hear you say coffee? I'll make some for everybody."

Agatha stepped into the kitchen in high spirits, but upon finding the black-labelled glass bottle, lifted it with a frown and said "What, just instant?"

"Don't expect luxury," Van said. "This isn't a resort hotel. We're on an uninhabited island."

Agatha's lips, colored a rosy pink, curled slightly in a pout. "Well what about the food?"

"It's in the fridge. It's useless though, since the electric and phone lines were cut during the fire. What's in there should be enough though."

"---Yeah, seems fine. Is there running water?"

"Yep. There's a stable water supply and it's all connected. Also, there's a propane tank hooked up too, so the stove and boiler are working. Which means the bath works too, if we get tired."

"Awesome job. ---Hmm. Are the pots and silverware left over from back then too? Or did you actually bring all of it?"

"No, they're left over. Three knives too. The cutting boards were all moldy though."

Orczy then walked in with a nervous gait.

"Oh hey Orczy, help me out. I'm glad so much stuff was left behind, but it all needs to be cleaned super bad." Agatha shrugged off her black razor jacket. Then, to Van, and Poe who was peeking into the kitchen from behind Orczy, she said "If you're not gonna help, then leave. You can go explore the island without us. We'll do coffee later."

She glared at them with a hand on her hip. Van forced a smile and withdrew dejectedly along with Poe. Agatha called out to their backs in a sweet voice. "Don't forget to make those nameplates. I don't want you bursting into my room while I'm changing."

Ellery and Leroux were already in the hall. "Chased out by the queen?" Ellery grinned as he gracefully rubbed his slender jaw. "Why don't we follow her orders and check out the island?"

"Sounds good. ---But where's Carr? Still in his room?"

"He left by himself," Leroux said, looking toward the entrance.

"Already?"

"That guy thinks he's a lone wolf," Ellery sneered.

＊

quote:

Turning right after leaving Decagon House, to the north, was a row of pine trees. That row of trees broke off at a single point, where the branches of the black pines on either side came together in an arch overhead. The four passed through that arch and walked to the charred remains of Blue Mansion.
(Refer to Fig.2 "Map of Horned Island")

The remains of the mansion consisted of only the barely-recognizable foundation and some filthy rubble scattered about. The front garden was in complete disarray and covered thickly with ash, and even many of the surrounding trees were noticeably withered, likely due to the heat of the flame.

"Completely destroyed... Wow. That fire was no joke." Ellery sighed as he surveyed the desolate landscape.

"Yeah, gee. There's nothing left."

"Oh Van, this is your first time seeing it too?"

Van nodded. "I've heard a bunch about it from my uncle, but this is my first time on the island. It was a lot of work getting all my luggage set up, and I was feverish too, so I wasn't up to strolling the island on my own."

"Hmm. Not that you missed much. It's just ash and rubble."

"You were totally hoping to find a dead body in there, weren't you Ellery?" Leroux said, smirking.

"Quit it. You're the only one who'd be into that."

To the west, there was a single small break in the trees. Shortly past that was a cliff. Beyond the vast blue ocean, a shadow of J Cape was faintly visible.

"Great weather. It's quite calming." Ellery looked out at the sea while stretching exaggeratedly.

Hands wrapped in the hem of his yellow sweatshirt, Leroux faced the sea as well. "It really is. Hard to believe, isn't it Ellery? That just half a year ago, in this very spot, that gruesome incident occurred."

"Gruesome... that's a good word for it. The Mysterious Quadruple Murder At Horned Island Mansion."

"In books, we're used to seeing five or even ten people get killed, but for it to happen in real life, and so nearby too... When I saw the news I was shocked."

"I believe it was early on September twentieth. The residence of Nakamura Seiji on Horned Island, also known as Blue Mansion, had gone up in flames and burned to the ground. In the wreckage, they discovered Nakamura Seiji with his wife Kazue, as well as the live-in servant couple, for a total of four corpses," Ellery explained dispassionately. "Large doses of sleeping medication were detected in all of the bodies, and it was determined that the causes of death were not all the same. The servant couple were in their own room, bound with rope and then struck in the head with an axe. Seiji, the head of the household, was drenched in kerosene and obviously burned to death. And discovered in the same room as him, the wife Kazue was evidently strangled to death with a cord-shaped weapon. Furthermore, the left arm of her corpse was severed below the wrist. And that hand was never discovered anywhere in the wreckage.

"Does that about sum up the incident, Leroux?"

"Wait, wasn't there also a gardener who went missing?"

"Ah yes. The gardener who'd arrived at the island several days prior and was never found, and nobody's heard from him since."

"Huh."

"There are two schools of thought about that. One is that the gardener was the culprit, and intentionally went undercover after the incident. The other is that the culprit was someone else. Like, maybe the gardener survived the initial attack, fell off a cliff while fleeing, and his body was washed away by the tide..."

"From a police perspective, the gardener = culprit theory sounds the most probable. I don't know what kind of further investigations they did though. What do you think, Ellery?"

"Lets see..." Ellery lightly brushed back hair that the wind had blown into his face. "Unfortunately, there's just not enough data. All the info we have is from the frantic, in-the-moment news broadcasts, and newspaper articles and stuff."

"Hey when'd you get so lame?"

"It's not lame. If you want me to cobble together some reasoning, I could. But the details are way too few to contain any solid proof. The police investigation was probably horrendously insufficient. When the actual scene of the crime has been reduced to this, what do you expect? And there were apparently no survivors. So yeah, it's natural to just jump to the conclusion that the gardener did it."

"Yeah, you're right."

"You could say that... the truth is lost in the ashes."

Swiftly turning a half circle, Ellery stepped into the heart of the wreckage. Then he picked up a stray piece of wood. Bending down, he peered underneath it.

"What are you doing?" Leroux asked, confused.

"Wouldn't it be interesting if that wife's hand showed up?" Ellery answered with an extremely serious look on his face. "Or if we went under the floorboards of Decagon House, and found the gardener's bleached-white corpse."

"drat, that's disturbing." Poe, who had been silently listening to their exchange, looked disgusted as he stroked his beard. "You've got some great taste there, Ellery."

"Seriously," said Leroux. "I didn't bring it up earlier on the boat, but if something happens here tomorrow or whatever, it'd totally fit that "stormy villa" stuff you love so much. If some serial murders like "And Then There Were None" went down, you'd be pretty overjoyed, wouldn't you?"

"Except he's the kinda guy who'd get killed first." Poe was a quiet man, but every so often he spat venomous remarks.

Van and Leroux looked at each other and snickered. Seeing this, Ellery said "Serial Murder on Lonely Island, eh? Hm, I like it." He showed no sign of embarrassment.

"I'm ready for it. I'll take on the role of detective. Well? How about it? Does anyone wish to challenge me, the great Ellery Queen?"

Fig.1 "Floorplan of Decagon House"

Fig.2 "Map of Horned Island"

--
Alright, so we've been sufficiently infodumped about that incident. I've got a teensy hunch that it'll be extremely important to the current murders that are obviously nigh. Also, to be honest it would be one HECK of a reverse psychology misdirect if it turns out the gardener actually did do it lmao. For me, the weirdest part is that missing hand. Like, first of all why was it cut, and second of all why was it never found. Are those the same reason or...?

I am also highly suspicious of those three knives. Actually, the way this author writes makes me suspicious of practically every single detail, because he's both super economical with scene length and also super thorough in his descriptions. Which make me think every single thing he goes out of his way to explain has to come back later. Is Agatha planning a murder and cleaning the dishes is part of the trick?? I don't knooowww!

If we're playing by "it has to be a misdirect" rules, then Van and Carr are already out for ever having been alone and hence suspicious, and hence not the culprit. And kind of same with Ellery for them literally saying how much he sure would love it if a murder happened. But I have a feeling Mr. Ayatsuji is doing all of that poo poo on purpose.

P.S. White Crane, you did a really admirable job drafting up a floorplan! I feel kinda bad that you didn't know the text provides one for us! For what it's worth though, I was really glad to see that you took the effort to make one, and also that the description was sufficient for you to independently make practically an identical floorplan, minus some details.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 02:51 on May 11, 2019

# ? Mar 20, 2019 05:55

Lord Zedd-Repulsa: Jul 21, 2007; Devour a good book.

I actually almost posted last night hoping the book came with a map of Decagon House because I'm really bad at mentally picturing directions and layouts. Right now I'm equally fascinated by the story and the editing discussion you two are having, so I may not have much else to say until more plot happens.

# ? Mar 20, 2019 09:58

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

onsetOutsider posted:

Van leaned against the door to his room, pulled out a Seven Star from the pocket of his ivory down vest, and held it in his mouth. Then he looked over the dim decagonal hall once again.

It's pretty clear from context that a Seven Star is a cigarette, but I'd probably specify that explicitly.

onsetOutsider posted:

"Thanks. ---So it must've been a lot of trouble bringing up all the blankets and everything."

"Oh, not at all. I had help from the movers."

Then Agatha left her room with her long hair done up in a scarf. "Nicely done, Van. I thought the room would be way grodier. ---Did I hear you say coffee? I'll make some for everybody."

onsetOutsider posted:

"No, they're left over. Three knives too. The cutting boards were all moldy though."

Then Orczy walked in with a nervous gait.

Again, I assume it's a byproduct of the original Japanese, but those two short "Then Agatha left her room"/"Then Orczy walked in" feel very unnatural in English.

I'd change the first one to:
"Nicely done, Van." Agatha emerged from her room with her long hair done up in a scarf. "I thought the room would be way grodier. ---Did I hear you say coffee? I'll make some for everybody."
The phrasing "left her room" is something that you'd normally use if the scene was being viewed from a perspective inside the room she was leaving. You could also say "entered the hall" instead of "emerged from her room", in this case.

And to second to:
"Orczy walked in with a nervous gait."
The use of "then" in the original isn't wrong, but it's odd. It implies a relationship between the events immediately before the sentence and those described in the sentence, and I think the sentence looks more natural without it.

Other than that, this one was all great.

onsetOutsider posted:

P.S. White Crane, you did a really admirable job drafting up a floorplan! I feel kinda bad that you didn't know the text provides one for us! For what it's worth though, I was really glad to see that you took the effort to make one, and also that the description was sufficient for you to independently make practically an identical floorplan, minus some details.

Eh, it only took me a minute. And I'm glad the one provided clears up the issue of where Van's room actually is.

onsetOutsider posted:

"I believe it was early on September twentieth. The residence of Nakamura Seiji on Horned Island, also known as Blue Mansion, had gone up in flames and burned to the ground. In the wreckage, they discovered Nakamura Seiji with his wife Kazue, as well as the live-in servant couple, for a total of four corpses," Ellery explained dispassionately. "Large doses of sleeping medication were detected in all of the bodies, and it was determined that the causes of death were not all the same. The servant couple were in their own room, bound with rope and then struck in the head with an axe. Seiji, the head of the household, was drenched in kerosene and obviously burned to death. And discovered in the same room as him, the wife Kazue was evidently strangled to death with a cord-shaped weapon. Furthermore, the left arm of her corpse was severed below the wrist. And that hand was never discovered anywhere in the wreckage.

I think it's worth noting that the manner of Seiji's death could have been suicide. It would be a horrible way to go, but self-immolation has precedent in Japan. The presence of sleeping medication in his body as well as the others tells against it, but doesn't rule it out -- he could have taken the pills then burned himself before they took effect.
I think you're also right that the missing hand seems like the strangest part of the murder. The fact that it was never found gives a strong implication that the murderer took it with them. I find myself wondering about wedding rings or engagement rings; they would be found on the left hand, and I can easily imagine that if the killer wanted them and found they couldn't easily pull them off the finger they might just chop off the hand in their haste.
Also, if everyone was dosed with sleeping medication, why were the servants tied up? Did the killer wake them so they could be interrogated, perhaps?

# ? Mar 20, 2019 11:38

Ben Nevis: Jan 20, 2011

I read this back in 2016 in the English translation. I'm really enjoying watching this unfold, and will be watching with interest.

# ? Mar 20, 2019 14:48

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

The_White_Crane posted:

Again, I assume it's a byproduct of the original Japanese, but those two short "Then Agatha left her room"/"Then Orczy walked in" feel very unnatural in English.

I did this because both of them were introduced with そこに (soko ni) which is both really curt and gives the impression of like "at that exact moment, X happened." However, the final gospel is whether it sounds good in English, so it must be changed. Somehow though, I feel like something's missing by just taking away the "then" like there's no transition at all. I'll think about it.

# ? Mar 20, 2019 17:13

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

onsetOutsider posted:

I did this because both of them were introduced with そこに (soko ni) which is both really curt and gives the impression of like "at that exact moment, X happened." However, the final gospel is whether it sounds good in English, so it must be changed. Somehow though, I feel like something's missing by just taking away the "then" like there's no transition at all. I'll think about it.

If you used it for only one of those two sentences, "at that moment" would actually sound more natural to me than "then". The second one with Orczy in particular, would work quite well IMO: "At that moment, Orczy walked in with a nervous gait."
Or "As he spoke, Orczy walked in with a nervous gait." perhaps. The problem is that "then" doesn't usually imply simultaneity, but rather subsequency.

"I walked into the room. Then the vase fell over." implies that the walking is finished before the vase falls.
"As I walked into the room, the vase fell over." makes the two events simultaneous.

Edit: another problem is that as I understand it, Japanese writing contains a lot more repetition than English writing, so you can get away with repeated phrases without it sounding unnatural. In English though, if you were to preface two sentences that close together with "at that moment", it would feel stilted.

The_White_Crane fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Mar 20, 2019

# ? Mar 20, 2019 17:31

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

@white crane
Well it didn't feel repetetive because in the original they occurred in different parts of the sentence. Also I feel like the Orczy sentence is somehow entirely fixed by switching two words. "Orczy then walked in with a nervous gait." And I can put "at that moment" on the Agatha sentence.

I sort of feel you wrt the point about repetition, but a lot of that is also on me. For example jpn has SO many ways of coloring the verb 笑う which covers the entire spectrum of laughing/smiling. So basically all of the multiple "smirks" and "grins" and "snickers" deserved entirely different words every single time but there simply aren't enough words in English. That also applies to quite a lot of transition words, like the number of ways to establish contrast or form condiionals is wayyy larger than English. Interestingly I was also having trouble in the 2nd update with all of the different words for "steep" that were used. In the description of the island I don't think the same word was ever used twice but I ended up having to say "steep" like five times.

# ? Mar 20, 2019 21:10

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

quote:

4

�This kind of place is totally disadvantageous for us women. If we�re not careful, they�ll use us like glorified maids.�

Agatha grumbled as she dexterously put away dishes. Standing next to her, Orczy got distracted by the quick movement of those slender white fingers, and accidentally let her own work slow to a halt.

�We should make the boys do some kitchen work too. We can�t let them get too lazy just �cause we�re around. Don�t you think?�

�Oh, um, yeah.�

�Seeing Ellery all serious wearing an apron and holding a ladle, that�d be priceless. And also probably kinda cute.� Agatha laughed without a care. Orczy stole a quick glance at her attractive profile, and held back a sigh.

The smooth bridge of her nose, framed by mature features. The light violet shadow around her eyes, flawlessly applied. That finely-styled wavy length of hair....

Agatha was always cheerful and brimming with confidence. Her personality was more like a boy's, yet she was fiercely attuned to her own femininity. She appeared to all but bask in the gazes of the men who admired her charm and beauty.

(Compared to that, I'm---)

A small button nose. Freckle-covered cheeks, red like a child's. Large eyes that would normally be cute, but were out of proportion with the rest of her face, making her anxious fidgeting all the more obvious. Even if she used makeup, she knew it wouldn't fit her like it did Agatha. Timid and anxious to the point of disgusting herself, and dim-witted on top of that....

It was impossible to ignore that Agatha and herself were the only women among their group of seven. That fact was a weight on her heart that she couldn't escape.

I shouldn't have come. Thoughts such as this were plaguing her.

She had been reluctant to visit the island in the first place. It felt almost like... desecrating a grave. However, she had been too meek to refuse her friends' vigorous invitations.

"My, Orczy, that's a lovely ring," Agatha said, looking at the middle finger of Orczy's left hand. "Have you been wearing that this whole time?"

Orczy shook her head vaguely.

"Ah, then someone gave it to you as a gift?"

"N, no... That's not..."

Orczy recalled the moment she'd decided to come to the island.

It's not a desecration, it's a mourning. I'm going to the island as a mourning for the dead, she told herself. And so....

"You're the same as ever, Orczy."

"---Huh?"

"You're always shutting up inside yourself. I've known you for two years already, but I feel like I barely know anything about you. Not that there's anything wrong with that. You're just... puzzling."

"Puzzling?"

"Yeah. At least, I feel that way sometimes when I read your stuff in the club bulletin. In the stories you write, the characters are always so energetic and cheerful. But..."

"That's escapism." Orczy avoided Agatha's eyes, hanging her head and letting a clumsy smile show on her lips. "I'm not fit for real life. The me in real life is terrible. I don't like her."

"What are you talking about?" Agatha smiled and flicked Orczy's short hair. "You've gotta be more confidant. You're cute, you know. It's just that you can't see it yourself. So quit acting so glum and hold your head up high."

"---You're a good person, Agatha."

"C'mon, let's finish this up quick so we can start on lunch. Kay?"

＊

quote:

At the remains of Blue Mansion, Ellery, Leroux, and Van remained. Poe had wandered off alone into the woods bordering the ruins.

"...So? Come on, Ellery. You too, Van. We're gonna be here for seven whole days, so at least think about it. Please?" Behind his comical silver-rimmed glasses -- though he would refuse to refer to them as such -- a flame burned in Leroux's eyes. "I'm not talkin' a hundred pages. But at least fifty."

"You've gotta be kidding, Leroux."

"I am always extremely serious, Ellery."

"But you can't put that on us all of a sudden. We weren't planning anything like that. Right, Van?"

"I'm with Ellery."

"Ugh, that's the point. Haven't you been listening? I want to release Dead Island earlier than normal, like mid-April at the latest. First of all to attract new students to the club, but also I want an especially big commemorative issue for our tenth anniversary. I'm finally becoming the new editor-in-chief, so I want to give it my all. I definitely don't want my first club bulletin to be all thin and pathetic."

Beginning this April, Leroux, second year literature student, would begin the role of editor in chief for the club bulletin Dead Island.

"Well Leroux, I mean..." Ellery took an unopened pack of Salems from the pocket of his wine-colored shirt, and broke the seal. He was a third year law student, and the current editor of Dead Island. "You've gotta butter up Carr in a situation like that. He's our most prolific writer, after all. ---Sorry Van, can I get a light?"

"You've been an especially poor example of that today, Ellery."

"What? No I haven't. Carr came at me first."

"True. Carr's been in an awkward mood, huh," said Leroux.

Ellery chuckled as he slowly exhaled smoke. "There's a reason for that."

"What do you mean?"

"The poor guy made a pass at Agatha recently, and got instantly denied."

"At Agatha? Wow, he's got guts."

"And then, maybe as revenge or something, he tried for Orczy too, but she wouldn't date him either."

"Orczy too...?" Van raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah. So the dude's not having a great time."

"Geez, no wonder. He's forced to stay under the same roof as both the girls who rejected him."

"Exactly. So you've gotta butter him up real bad if you even want him to write a word."

That's when they spotted Agatha approaching from the direction of Decagon House. Shortly after passing under the arch of black pines, she stopped and waved with a wide motion at the three of them.

"Time for lunch! ---Wait, where's Poe and Carr? Weren't they with you?"

＊

quote:

The forest path behind Decagon House---

He'd gone in because he wanted to check out the eastern cliffs, but the further he went, the thinner the trail became. And furthermore, the seemingly random twists and bends made him lose his sense of direction before even fifty meters in.

It was a dismal wood.

Between the trees, thickly overgrown kumazasa plants clawed at his clothes with every step. The terrain was also harsh, and he nearly tripped countless times.

He considered turning back, but that would also be trouble at this point. This was a very small island. The possibility of getting so lost you couldn't find your way back was essentially nonexistent.

The throat of the turtleneck sweater he was wearing under his jacket was damp with sweat. Just when his discomfort had reached its peak, he finally reached the end of the forest.

It was right on edge of the cliff. The brightness of the sea stung his eyes. Then, he noticed the burly man standing there facing the sea --- Poe.

"Hm? Oh, Carr." Having turned at the sound of footsteps, then recognizing Carr, Poe returned to face the sea. "This is the north cliff. That's probably Cat Island." He pointed to a tiny island visible nearby.

It was small enough to mistake for a reef. Barely a lump of land on the water, with a light smattering of bushes on top. As the name "Cat Island" suggests, it looked as if some huge, black beast were crouching in the ocean.

Glancing at the island for a second, Carr said "Mhm" and gave a slight nod.

"What's wrong, Carr? You seem down."

"Hmph. Just wishin' I never came here," Carr spoke roughly with a scowl. �There obviously won�t be anything interesting at this point, about that incident last year. I figured it�d still be a good creative stimulus, but... hmph, when I think about how I�ve gotta look at everyone�s faces for a whole week, yeah I�m feelin� down.�

Same as Ellery, Carr was a third year law student. However, since he�d taken a gap year after highschool, he and Poe were equals by actual age.

He was of medium height and muscle. Due to his short neck and slouched posture, however, he appeared rather small.

�What�re you doin� standing here all alone?�

�Nothing really.� Beneath his bushy eyebrows, Poe�s already thin eyes got even thinner. He removed a cigarette from the cherry wood case dangling from his waist like an inrou, and put it in his mouth as he held another out to Carr.

�drat, how many boxes of those do you have? You�re literally always offering them to people, and still smoke like a pack a day yourself.�

�What can I say? I like �em, despite studying medicine.�

�Larks, as always. Not a very health-conscious choice.� While he complained, Carr still grabbed the cigarette from Poe. �Though it�s leagues better than Ellery�s menthols...�

�That's not helping, Carr. You keep jumping down Ellery�s throat. It'll just make you more miserable. The more you try to pick fights with him, the more he'll feel justified in riling you up."

Carr lit the cigarette with his own lighter, then looked away in a huff. "I don't need your pity."

Poe showed no sign of being offended. He merely blew smoke in silence, savoring the taste.

After a time, Carr threw his half-smoked Lark into the ocean. Then he sat on a nearby rock and removed a whiskey flask from his jacket. He violently opened the top and took a large swig.

"Day drinking? Really?"

"Oh, lay off."

"I'm not impressed," Poe said in a stricter tone. "Can't you restrain yourself a little? At least during the day...."

"Hah. You're still worried about that?"

"Well, as long as you understand."

"I don't understand. How long has it been since then, huh? You can't worry about it forever."

Shooting a fierce sidelong glance at Poe, Carr raised the bottle again to his lips. "Ellery's not the only one ruining this for me. Bringing girls along to an uninhabited island doesn't sit right with me."

"You say uninhabited island, but it's not like we're living in the wilderness."

"Hmph. Even when I'm in a good mood I hate bein' around stuck up girls like Agatha. And Orczy's even worse. Through some stupid twist of fate, these past one or two years we seven have become kind of a friend group, which I'm drat embarrassed to admit, but how the hell did we end up with such a depressing, useless girl? And she's so frickin' self-conscious..."

"That's cutting too deep, I think."

"Oh, whoops. I forgot you and Orczy were sort of childhood friends."

Poe stomped out his cigarette disconsolately. Then, as if remembering something, he looked down at his watch. "It's already one thirty. We should head back soon. Don't wanna miss a meal."

＊

quote:

"Before we eat, listen up." Wearing a slim pair of lensless glasses with gold frames, Ellery addressed everyone. "Next term's editor-in-chief would like your attention, please."

Arrangements for lunch were set out on the decagonal table. Bacon and eggs with a garden salad, french toast, and coffee on the side.

"Erm, as we meet for this meal, I'd like to formally announce..." Leroux began stiffly, then cleared his throat in an overly formal manner. "As you all know, we had the idea to visit Decagon House back at our recent New Year's party. At the time, no one thought it would actually come to pass, but wouldn't you know it, since his uncle got his hands on the property soon afterwards, Van invited us here."

"It wasn't an invitation. I just said I could ask my uncle about it, if you really wanted to come."

"How humble. ---So Van's uncle, as you know, runs a real estate business in S town. Being a shrewd and enterprising man, he also drafted plans for a large-scale remodeling of Horned Island into a resort and spa aimed at young people. Isn't that right, Van?"

"It's not anything so extravagant though..."

"Well anyway, it's thanks to him that we were able to get to where we are today, acting as his first test group technically. I'd also like to show my gratitude to Van for waking up early to come make all manner of preparations for us. Sincerely, thank you very much." Leroux gave a respectful bow towards Van. "Now, to address the main topic---"

"That's fine, but the eggs and coffee are getting cold," Agatha interrupted.

"I'll be quick, I promise. Oh you know what, fine. I don't want your hard work to go to waste, so go ahead everyone, listen while you eat.

"Um, so all of us gathered here today bear names bequeathed to us by our classmates who have already graduated, and all the expectations that come along with that. In other words, this is a meeting of the most trusted writers in our club...."

In the K University mystery club, referring to one another by nicknames was a tradition passed down since the club's inception.

Ten years ago when the club was started, the founding members decided that because of the child-like nature inherent to mystery-lovers, they would choose nicknames based on famous western mystery novelists. Then, as the years went by and membership increased, naturally there weren't enuogh notable authors to pick from anymore, so their revolutionary solution was the "name inheritance" system. Essentially, upon the graduation of a name-bearing member, that name would be inherited by the underclassman of their choosing.

Of course, it became standard for the selection of successors to be based upon the quality of one's contributions to the club bulletin. Consequently, the ones who bore those names currently were by all accounts the leaders of the club, and therefore had had many opportunities to meet together.

"We've got all these strong writers gathered, about to spend a week on an uninhabited island with no worldly distractions from our thoughts. We've got nothing but idle time." Leroux looked at each member with a calm grin. "I've prepared writing paper. Everyone, we're going to publish the bulletin in April, so this trip is going to be a writing getaway. I thank you in advance for your hard work."

Agatha let loose an exclamation of surprise. "No wonder! I thought your luggage looked weirdly bulky. So that's what you were up to."

"Indeed, I was up to this. Agatha, Orczy, I believe in you."

After giving a slight bow, Leroux scratched his round cheeks and went "Eheheh...." He gave the impression of a bespectacled fukusuke. On the faces around the table, dumbstruck smiles were leaking out.

"You realize we'd probably all write about serial murders on an isolated island, right? What'll you do then?" Poe interjected.

Leroux puffed out his chest and said "Then we'll advertise it as a theme of the issue. Actually, why don't we write with that goal in mind. That's actually perfect. 'Cause the bulletin's name Dead Island was the title of the original Japanese translation of Christie's famous novel, right?"

Nudging Leroux with an elbow, Ellery whispered conspicuously to Van in the next seat over. "Goodness me, this editor-in-chief means business."

SCENE BY SCENE COMMENTS

Agatha, your first line is wrong on so many levels, I don't even know where to start. You made Leroux carry your bags for you, Van offered to make coffee first before you barged in, and then you're the one who insisted on washing the dishes! Maybe you're just making girl-talk with Orczy but geez girl, get it together!

Okay, it'll take a lot to convince me that Orczy isn't experiencing lesbian angst here.

Speaking of, I feel kind of insecure about my writing in that Orczy/Agatha scene. It's our first look into Orczy's mind and the text has a ton of delicacy but I keep feeling like I couldn't get it to sound quite right. But if I keep staring at it I'll never get the update done, so...

---

Important to remember: the Japanese school year starts in April. That would make this, I guess, their between-years break (equivalent of summer vacation). I'm assuming their given years are what they're about to start, since otherwise, like, Poe would have already graduated lol.

That also means that a "New Year's party" is also like an "end of school party". Just stuff to keep in the back of your mind.

---

Everyone else gets a single random mention of their field of study, but for Poe it's BY THE WAY HE'S A MEDICAL STUDENT every chapter lol. Not only that but we've been reminded several times that he's a senior.

---

With this exposition about the name inheritance, it's pretty clear that the mystery club is more than just a reason for the main characters to poke the fourth wall. poo poo is probably gonna get complicated there...

---

(edit: oh yeah, so now Poe has also been alone, and it wasn't explicitly stated but let's not forget that Orczy was also alone while Agatha went to fetch people for lunch, and Agatha technically could have done any nefarious poo poo on her way over. So the ONLY one who hasn't been blatantly allowed room to be suspicious is Leroux. and maybe, maybe Ellery)

As always, please alert me to any embarrassing typoes I may have missed.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 07:41 on Mar 26, 2019

# ? Mar 23, 2019 13:23

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

onsetOutsider posted:

As the name "Cat Island" suggests, it looked as if some huge, black beast were crouching in the ocean.

That should probably be "suggested", given the tense of the rest of the sentence.

onsetOutsider posted:

"Before we eat, listen up." Wearing a slim pair of lensless glasses with gold frames, Ellery addressed everyone. "Next term's editor-in-chief would like your attention, please

Lensless glasses? Literally just glasses frames? Or do they have glass in but just flat and non-magnifying?

(Also, this is another one of those sentences where the syntax is weird in English, because you generally don't use a passive verb like "wear" in the form "Verbing a noun, Person verbed." That structure is usually kept for more active things:
Effectively, if the past-tense version of a verb implies a continuing action, like "he held the tray of cookies" or "he wore a black stetson", it sounds weird in that sentence structure, whereas if the past tense implies a discrete action "he waved a red banner" or "he broke the willow twig" then it works more naturally: "Holding the gun, John shouted." versus "Waving the gun, John shouted.")

Content:
Cigarettes! I note that we've now been explicitly told that Poe smokes Larks, Ellery smokes Salem Menthols, and Van smokes Seven Stars. This is totally gonna be relevant.
Also both Leroux and Ellery wear glasses of some kind, with Ellery's being "lensless" and gold framed and Ellery's being circular. The fact that Ellery's are lensless (whatever that exactly means) presumably implies that his vision is fine, which might also be important.
Leroux' luggage was "weirdly bulky", which Agatha ascribes to the writing paper, but could hide a multitude of sins.
Interesting.

Very interested to see where this goes. :allears:

# ? Mar 25, 2019 16:41

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

quote:

5

The sky darkened on the first day without incident.

Aside from Leroux's call for manuscripts, no one had any particular commitments. The group had never been the type to hang out together for no reason, so when nothing else was going on they each spent time doing their own things.

Then, evening---

"What are you up to, Ellery? Fiddling with playing cards all by yourself." Agatha had just left her room. The bright yellow scarf typing up her hair popped vibrantly over the monochrome of her white blouse and black razor pants.

"I've been into this lately. I wouldn't go so far as to call myself an enthusiast though." Ellery rifled through cards and smiled.

"You're into... what? You've started doing fortune-telling?"

"Seriously? As if." While skillfully shuffling the cards atop the decagonal table, Ellery proclaimed "With cards like these, we're obviously talking magic."

"Magic?" Agatha stared blankly for a moment before going "Aha" and nodding. "Come to think of it, I did notice that about you."

"Notice what?"

"Y'know, your habit of confusing people for fun."

"I'm not sure I like that wording."

"Oh, you don't?" Agatha smiled brightly. "Well c'mon, show me something. I haven't seen that many magic tricks before."

"Really? It's rare to find a mystery fan who's not also interested in magic."

"I didn't say I don't like it. I just haven't had the chance to see a lot. So show me one."

"Alright. Come and sit down then."

Since the sky was nearing full darkness, the main hall of Decagon House was awash in very dim lighting. Agatha sat in the chair facing Ellery diagonally with the table between them, as Ellery gathered up the cards, set them aside, and procured an additional deck of cards from within his jacket.

"Now then, I have here two different decks, red backs and blue backs. From this point on, You'll be using one deck and I'll be using the other. Would you like to pick?"

"I'll do blue," Agatha answered immediately.

"Cool. Then go ahead and take the blue cards." Ellery handed the blue deck across the table. "First, after you make sure there's no trick to those cards, I'll let you mix them up as much as you like. And I'll shuffle my red cards too. Sound good?"

"Yeah. These are definitely normal playing cards. American?"

"They're called Bicycle Rider Backs. The design on the back is an angel riding a bicycle. It's the most popular brand over there." Ellery placed his carefully shuffled deck on the table. "Now, we exchange decks. Hand over the blue ones. And here's the red ones. ---Okay. Next, you with me? You're going to pick out a card and remember it. Then I'll do the same with the deck you mixed up."

"Any card I want?"

"Yep. ---You got it? Now put it back on the top of the deck. Then cut it once just like I did here. Just switch the top half and bottom half like so. Yeah, you got it. Do that two or three more times."

"---Is that enough?"

"Perfect. You did great. Now we switch decks one more time." Once again, he passed the blue deck to Agatha. Looking directly into Agatha's eyes, he said "Good? Now what have we done here? We've each picked a single card out of different shuffled decks, then put them back and shuffled again."

"Yeah, obviously."

"Alright, now, if you will, please search through that deck for the card you memorized. Then place it face down on the table. And I'll look for my own in this deck."

Soon, there were two cards, one red and one blue, on the table. Ellery took one breath, then ordered Agatha to flip both cards on the table.

"Wha--- How?" Agatha couldn't help but be surprised. The face of both cards showed the exact same suit and number.

"Four of hearts, eh?" Ellery said with a self-satisfied grin. "Not a bad choice, if I do say so myself."

＊

quote:

When the sun set, an antique oil lamp was lit in the center of the decagonal table. Van had brought it, hearing that the electricity was cut. In each of the rooms other than the main hall, thick candles were liberally arranged.

When dinner was over, it was already past seven o' clock.

"Come on Ellery, tell me how you did those tricks before." After distributing coffee to everyone, Agatha poked Ellery's shoulder.

"I'm still not gonna say. Revealing your methods is a strict taboo in magic. In that sense it's very different from mysteries. Because in magic, no matter how fantastical it seems at first, knowing the trick will always disappoint you."

"Agatha, don't tell me Ellery made you into a guinea pig for his tricks, did he?"

"Oh, you knew he did magic tricks, Leroux?"

"Heh, I knew alright. I was basically his sleight of hand punching bag for the past month. He told me to keep it a secret until he was good enough. He was surprisingly childish about it."

"Hey, watch it, Leroux."

"Which one did you show her?"

"Oh, just a couple simple techniques."

"Whaat, those were simple?" Agatha was becoming more disgruntled. "Then it's fine. Just tell me."

"It's a faulty assumption that I should tell you just 'cause they're simple. That first one I showed you is so basic that even little kids can figure it out, but it's not really about the trick itself at all, but the performance of it. That and misdirection."

"Performance?"

"Yeah. For example..." Ellery picked up his cup and sipped his black coffee. "It was pretty much the same trick as the one in the film Magic, in the part where Anthony Hopkins's character, a magician, does a trick for his childhood lover. He doesn't perform it like a normal magic trick, but as an ESP experiment. First he established that if the wavelengths of their minds were compatible, then their cards would match. And with that setup, he managed to seduce her."

"Hmm. So, you were trying to seduce me in the same way, then?"

"Oh please," Ellery dismissed with an exaggerated gesture, letting his teeth show from between his rosy lips. "Unfortunately, the courage to seduce Her Majesty is currently beyond my grasp."

"Very well said."

"Why thank you. ---By the way..." Ellery lifted the coffee cup again, and spoke while examining it intensely. "This is a topic change and I know we mentioned it earlier, but that Nakamura Seiji... he was totally obsessive. Like, I'm kind of getting chills looking at this cup."

A stylish moss-green cup. It was one of the many pieces left behind in the kitchen cupboard, but the noteworthy aspect was the shape. Indeed, it was a decagon identical to the building itself.

"They must be custom made. That ashtray too, and the plates we've been using. Every single thing in here is a decagon. ---What do you think of that, Poe?"

"Nothin' much," Poe said, putting his half-smoked cigarette into the decagon ashtray. "Obviously I find it a little eccentric, but wealthy people usually have fun in weird ways like that."

"Wealthy people having fun, huh?" Holding the cup in both hands, Ellery peered into it from the top. Although it was technically a decagon, with the small diameter of such a cup, it appeared round. "Well anyway, even if it was just for the sake of seeing Decagon House, coming all the way here was worth it. It makes me want to drink a toast to the deceased."

"But Ellery, sure we're all glad to be here, but besides Decagon house, there's nothing exciting about the island itself. It's nothing but a barren pine forest."

"That's not true," Poe said to Agatha. "At the cliff to the west of the ruins, there's a nice rocky area, with stairs leading right down to the beach. Maybe we can actually do some fishing."

"Speaking of which, Poe, you brought fishing tools, didn't you? That sounds fun. I hope we can eat some fresh fish tomorrow." Leroux licked his lips.

"Don't expect too much, dude." Poe softly rubbed his beard. "Also, there's a bunch of sakura trees growing out back. The buds seemed really big when I checked, so maybe they'll blossom in two or three days' time."

"How wonderful. If that happens, let's all watch."

"That'd be nice."

"Sakura sakura and more sakura... Why is it that whenever you mention spring, it turns into a sakura-fest? Personally I like peach and plum blossoms way better."

"That's because you're a hipster, Ellery."

"Really, Leroux? Because long ago in this country, the truly distinguished folk admired plum blossoms much more than sakura."

"Wait, is that true?"

"Indeed it is. Right, Orczy?"

Startled at being spoken to so suddenly, Orczy jumped slightly. Then she nodded with a faint blush.

"Care to elaborate, Orczy?"

"Err... right. Well, in the Man'youshuu, the most common poem subjects are clovers and plum blossoms. Each of them are featured in more than a hundred verses, but the sakura is only mentioned in about forty."

Same as Leroux, Orczy was a second year literature student. Her area of study was English literature, but she was also quite knowledgeable in classical Japanese works.

"Wow, I didn't know that," Agatha said, impressed. She was completely out of her element as a third year pharmacology student. "Tell us more, Orczy."

"Ah, okay," Orczy answered anxiously. "The time of the Man'youshuu was a period of widespread Chinese supremacist thought, so the sensibilities of mainland China were greatly influential in Japan. We see a lot more poetry about sakura starting from the Kokin Wakashuu... um, but they're mainly about the falling leaves."

"Kokin... that's the Heian period, right?" Ellery said.

"Emperor Daigo's reign. Early tenth century..."

"It's probably 'cause the quality of life was so depressing in that period, that there's a lot of poetry about falling leaves."

"Maybe. What I'm talking about is the period of Daigo's reign referred to as the Engi era. At that time, the falling of sakura leaves was associated with the season where infectious diseases were easily transmitted. Believing that the sakura invited illness to the land, the imperial court instituted a flower appeasement ceremony. Um, so that's probably... related...."

"I see, I see."

"What's wrong, Van? You've been awfully quiet," said Poe, looking at Van who was hanging his head in the next seat over. "You feeling sick?"

"---Yeah. I have a small headache."

"You seem pale. ---And you're hot."

Van lifted his head with much effort, and sighed deeply. "Sorry, but I'm gonna go to bed early, if that's okay."

"Yeah. Of course."

"Kay. Goodnight...." Placing both hands on the table, Van slowly pushed himself out of his chair. "Don't worry about me, guys. Make as much noise as you want. That stuff doesn't bother me."

Once everyone said goodnight to him, Van slunk into his room. After the door was closed, the hall returned to silence for a moment. Then, a small metallic clack sounded.

"What an rear end in a top hat," murmured Carr, who'd been silently tapping his foot until now. Seeming on edge, his sanpaku eyes flashed open. "Making a show of locking his door. Like he's some overly self-conscious woman."

"The sky's bright tonight." Pretending not to hear, Poe looked up through the decagon skylight.

"That makes sense, since it was a full moon the day before last," said Leroux. Light was pouring delicately into the skylight. The light from the lighthouse on J Cape was visible from the island.

"Look, the moon has a ring around it. That means it'll rain tomorrow."

"Haha, you believe that superstition, Agatha?"

"Don't be rude, Ellery. It's not entirely superstition, you know. It's got something to do with the water vapor in the air."

"The weekly forecast said it'll be clear skies for a while still."

"Well at least it's more scientific than believing in the rabbit on the moon."

"Ah, the rabbit on the moon," Ellery said with a sarcastic grin. "Did you know? On the Miyako Islands, they see a man carrying a bucket instead."

"Oh, I think I've heard about that before," Leroux cut in with a smile on his round face. "The gods ordered him to bring a drug of immortality and a drug of death down to the human world, right? But he made a mistake and accidentally gave the immortality drug to the snake, and the death drug to the humans. So as punishment, they made him carry the bucket to this day... or something like that."

"Yeah, that's it."

"There's a similar story from the Khoikhoi tribe," Poe said. "But instead of a man, it's also a rabbit. When the rabbit failed to follow the word of god, he threw a rod at him, splitting his lip in three."

"Hmm. The things people come up with are the same no matter where you go." Ellery leaned his lanky body back in the blue chair, arms crossed. "There are still a lot of places that see rabbits on the moon. Like China and India..."

"India too?"

"The Sanskrit word for moon is 'shashin' which literally means 'having the hare'."

"Huh." Reaching for his box of cigarettes on the table, Poe looked up at the skylight again. A small piece of the sky, cut into a decagon shape, and the yellow moon floating in it.

Horned Island, Decagon House.

The faint lamplight cast wavering shadows of everyone on the white walls of the hall.

Aimlessly, the night went on.

CHAPTER 1 DONE!!

I hope you enjoyed this installment of "kids talk about random crap for a while".

I've gotta say, I did not (when I first read it) expect the chapter to end with such a rambling montage of basically completely random, seemingly irrelevant subjects. I mean, we went from a (all things considered) pretty random American horror movie, to which plants are featured in classical Japanese poetry, to myths about the moon. I can't even begin to fathom at this point how all of these things could possibly be relevant enough to justify taking up this much space, when Ayatsuji has established pretty strongly that he has no intention of wasting time/words. In another book I might write it off as a weird diatribe (or, well, a whole heap of diatribes), but because of this book's reputation I will trust him, and therefore continue to be super concerned for what kind of crazy puzzles we're gonna be faced with that requires this random crap to be established here.

Also, a whole heck load of time was spent on that card trick as well. It's almost like this entire section was Ayatsuji making GBS threads all over his own pacing, and I'm just waiting w bated breath for it to come back into play so I can understand what this was all about.

Oh yeah, shout-out to wikipedia for making poo poo easier for me sometimes lol. Also note: I'm not loving smart, I had to look poo poo up for all that history talk. Really though all you need to know is that those are books of poetry, and maybe compare the years on them. Recommended reading is the sanpaku article though because there's some interesting implications there. I'll quote the main bit here, a quote from some expert on superstitions or something:

"For thousands of years, people of the Far East have been looking into each other's eyes for signs of this dreaded condition. Any sign of sanpaku meant that a man's entire system � physical, physiological and spiritual � was out of balance. He had committed sins against the order of the universe and he was therefore sick, unhappy, insane, what the West has come to call "accident prone". The condition of sanpaku is a warning, a sign from nature, that one's life is threatened by an early and tragic end."

Watch out there Carr. I don't want you to die before you get any character development! You can't just be an rear end in a top hat, right?

Ah, one more thing, I spent a really long time trying to find sources for the Sanskrit thing, and huzzah! I finally did! Also here is a way vaguer but super old and scholarly source which at the very least connects the sound "shashin" with rabbits, sort of. Alright, that's enough nerdy poo poo for one post.

Next up will be the start of chapter 2 :toot:

@white crane: aagh, I just put preview to check over the next update and you've posted like RIGHT when I was about to! Guess I'll use this space to reply to you also lol. I went back and checked the word for the lensless glasses and then looked it up on google images (an indispensable translation tool btw), and it turns out they could have plain glass or empty holes, the word isn't specifically one or the other. I kind of assumed it meant there was no glass which is why I said lensless, but maybe "fashion glasses" would be more accurate, tho it kind of sounds stupider. Oh yeah also my nitpicky friend wanted me to mention that she approves of your grammar corrections lol. Also in general thanks for being my partner in crime, almost :P

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 07:40 on Mar 26, 2019

# ? Mar 25, 2019 16:53

The_White_Crane: May 10, 2008

onsetOutsider posted:

Since the sky was nearing full darkness, the main hall of Deacagon House was awash in very dim lighting.

Whoops.

onsetOutsider posted:

I've gotta say, I did not (when I first read it) expect the chapter to end with such a rambling montage of basically completely random, seemingly irrelevant subjects. I mean, we went from a (all things considered) pretty random American horror movie, to which plants are featured in classical Japanese poetry, to myths about the moon. I can't even begin to fathom at this point how all of these things could possibly be relevant enough to justify taking up this much space, when Ayatsuji has established pretty strongly that he has no intention of wasting time/words. In another book I might write it off as a weird diatribe (or, well, a whole heap of diatribes), but because of this book's reputation I will trust him, and therefore continue to be super concerned for what kind of crazy puzzles we're gonna be faced with that requires this random crap to be established here.

Also, a whole heck load of time was spent on that card trick as well. It's almost like this entire section was Ayatsuji making GBS threads all over his own pacing, and I'm just waiting w bated breath for it to come back into play so I can understand what this was all about.

Yeah, that's a very odd scene.
Takeaways:
1) Ellery is good at sleight of hand.
2) Leroux potentially learned about it from him.
3) Poe has fishing equipment.
4) Van is ill (poisoned?) or faking being ill. He locked his door, which seems like an odd thing to bother with.
5) Carr mocks Van for locking his door, possibly trying to discourage other people from doing it?

onsetOutsider posted:

@white crane: aagh, I just put preview to check over the next update and you've posted like RIGHT when I was about to! Guess I'll use this space to reply to you also lol. I went back and checked the word for the lensless glasses and then looked it up on google images (an indispensable translation tool btw), and it turns out they could have plain glass or empty holes, the word isn't specifically one or the other. I kind of assumed it meant there was no glass which is why I said lensless, but maybe "fashion glasses" would be more accurate, tho it kind of sounds stupider. Oh yeah also my nitpicky friend wanted me to mention that she approves of your grammar corrections lol. Also in general thanks for being my partner in crime, almost :P

You're welcome.

Thanks for being such a good sport about my constant pedantry, and I'm glad to have a fellow nitpicker's approval!

Re the glasses, I'd expect it to be more likely that they have plain glass, since that's fairly common for fashion accessories, whereas empty frames would look very weird. The reason I asked was because it seems like something that could come up in the future, with them possibly getting broken and there being/not being glass at the scene, and I wondered if it would be relevant, though obviously you wouldn't want to reveal that in advance...

# ? Mar 25, 2019 17:56

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

The_White_Crane posted:

The reason I asked was because it seems like something that could come up in the future, with them possibly getting broken and there being/not being glass at the scene, and I wondered if it would be relevant, though obviously you wouldn't want to reveal that in advance.

I'm not dodging spoilers, I just actually have no idea lol. I'm not saying exactly what I don't know because even knowing what there's a *lack* of between now and the end of chapter 4 (where I paused) would be spoiling. No I'm not gonna tell you whether someone dies by then :v:

(i'm not gonna read ahead until I translate the first 4 chapters. Cuz at that point I want to be able to give my unfiltered thoughts w/o any future knowledge. And also, like, I don't want to have to read the entire thing twice lol. It'll be rly fun for me once I catch up I think.)

I think I can say w confidence though that if the glass part of Ellery's glasses will be in any way relevant, then it'll be explicitly specified at some point. Simply the fact that they were brought up (and have gold frames rather than Leroux's silver frames) makes me think something will happen. But like, every detail makes me think that and there's no way it'll ALL be used to solve a murder....... right?

Oh also I forgot to mention that I do know how Ellery did that card trick. It's really not that hard to figure out. Well, granted I've had almost the exact same trick done to me before but the production of it was way worse so I figured it out instantly.

# ? Mar 25, 2019 20:04

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

quote:

Chapter Two
First day - Mainland

quote:

1

Reclining on the futon laid out sloppily in the middle of his room, Kawaminami Takaaki frowned in thought.

Eleven in the morning. When he'd returned home just now, that letter had been slipped into his mail slot.

He had stayed up the previous night playing mahjong at a friend's dorm. Like always, even after arriving back at his room the sound of the shuffling tiles had echoed hazily inside his head, but as soon as he saw the contents of that letter, he completely snapped out of it.

"The heck is this?"

Rubbing his eyes, he picked up the envelope the letter was in and reexamined it closely.

It was a manila envelope with no distinguishing features whatsoever. The postmarked date was yesterday --- March twenty fifth. The shipping address was within O City. The only strange part about it, if he were pushed to say, might be that all the text was typed with a word processor.

There was no return address. Only the name "Nakamura Seiji" printed on the back of the envelope.

"Nakamura Seiji," he muttered to himself. An unfamiliar name. ---Wait, no, he felt like he'd heard it somewhere before.

He sat up, crossed his legs on the futon, and returned his focus to the letter itself. A word processor had also been used for this part. The paper was B5 size and high quality.

"The girl you all killed was my daughter, Chiori."

He did recognize the name Chiori. It was probably Nakamura Chiori from back then. In that case, maybe her father was this Nakamura Seiji.

It had already been over a year since the incident last January.

K University's mystery club, which Kawaminami used to be a part of, had held a New Year's party. Nakamura Chiori had been a relatively new member of the club, one year below him, meaning she'd been a first year. Kawaminami was currently a third year, a fourth year next month, but last spring he'd quit the club.

At the third party of the night, Nakamura Chiori had died.

Kawaminami had left the restaurant early, after which the "accident" had happened. A heart failure brought about by acute alcohol poisoning, he'd heard. Apparently, by the time the ambulance had reached the hospital, she was already beyond treatment.

Kawaminami had attended her funeral.

As Chiori had been living wth her grandfather on her mother's side, the funeral service had been conducted there as well. But to Kawaminami's recollection, the chief mourner hadn't been named Seiji. It had been a much more old-fashioned male name. A name much more suited to a grandfather than a father. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen anyone at the funeral who'd seemed to be Chiori's father either.

So then, why would someone claiming to be her father send such a letter to someone he'd never met?

In the letter, "Seiji" had emphasized that Chiori was killed.

Considering that his daughter died of alcohol poisoning at a social event where she'd been made to drink, it was probably natural to feel that she had been killed. But even if you wanted to voice that opinion, why wait until over a year had passed before doing so?

After thinking for a bit, Kawaminami suddenly straightened his posture.

(Nakamura Seiji... Ah!)

The knot of memory was starting to unravel.

He stood up violently. Then he went to the steel rack against one wall and pulled out several files. They were full of newspaper clippings he used for his hobby.

(I remember... It was last September...)

After a bit of rustling, he found the article he'd been looking for.

Once his finger found that large, bold headline, Kawaminami sat on the floor with the file still open in his hands.

"Convicted by the dead, huh?"

＊

quote:

"---Ah, is this the Higashi residence? Um, I'm a student at K University. Is Hajime there?"

"Is that you, Kawaminami?" The voice on the other end sounded like Hajime's mother. "He actually just left on a trip this morning, with a bunch of his club friends."

"Mystery club members?"

"Yes. What did he say again, something about an uninhabited island."

"An uninhabited island? Do you know the name?"

"Hmm, I think it was called Horned Island. Near the S Town harbor."

"Horned Island...." Kawaminami gripped the receiver tightly, thoughts racing. "Er, did you happen to receive a letter addressed to Hajime?"

"A letter?"

"Yes, a letter from a man named Nakamura Seiji."

"Well..." She hesitated a bit, but perhaps she picked up on the urgency in Kawaminami's voice, because she continued "Wait one moment please," and put him on hold. The sound of a music box beat harshly against his ear for a while, and then the voice returned with an apprehensive tone.

"It came. Why did you want to know?"

"It's there? It's really there?"

"Yes..."

All at once, the strength left his shoulders and he felt awkward for some reason. "Oh, um, thank you for your help. ---No, it's nothing. Sorry for disturbing you."

After hanging up the phone, Kawaminami kept standing there, leaning against the wall.

It was an old building. If too much body weight was applied, the entire wall would moan. From outside the ramshackle window, the sputtering sound of the washing machines could always be heard.

(A letter from Nakamura Seiji also got sent to Higashi's address...)

He blinked his bloodshot eyes several times.

(Maybe it's just a prank.)

After checking the club address book, he phoned an additional two, then three of the other members who'd been present at that third party of the night. However, none picked up, and the rest lived in school dorms, so he wasn't able to confirm anything. ---Except...

They were currently on a trip. And of all places, the trip was to Horned Island where that problematic incident had taken place. ---Could that possibly be a total coincidence?

Having mulled it over to exhaustion, Kawaminami opened the address book again, this time looking for the number listed for the late Nakamura Chiori.

Okay, so the post-chapter break is done and I'm updating again. I'm definitely not gonna do this every time, but I was getting tired and it was a convenient time to take a break. To be honest, I was considering doing section 2 in this update too because this is kind of a relatively short update, but since it's introducing an entirely different "side" of the story, and also establishing elements that may put the main cast's actions in a different light, I figured it's enough. But yeah I'm going back to 3-ish times a week update schedule.

It was at this point in reading that I truly started to feel scared for how complex the puzzles will be in this novel, and the reason is the names. The -minami part of Kawaminami's name is both written and pronounced like the word for "south". Higashi (which is one of the guys on the island if you didn't catch that) is written and pronounced like the word for "east" and his given name Hajime is written with the symbol for the number one. ALL THREE OF THESE THINGS ARE ALSO MAHJONG TILES BY THE WAY. Maybe I'm thinking too much into it, but the fact that the "east coast" or "south coast" etc of the island are referenced a bunch, and the mention of mahjong, makes me super scared for the extent of the puzzles later. Like, idfk how this stuff would be incorporated into a mystery but still. This is also revealing that the true names of the other 6 island kids will probably also be relevant, and we might have to piece together the names with the students.

More explicitly though, we have 2 major reveals in this section. The mysterious letters, and Chiori's death. Both of them have huge implications, but I don't know exactly what they're implications of. It's all pretty crazy and hopefully you'll start to realize soon why I felt the need to go back and reread/write the entire thing down in English. Cuz it doesn't stop being like this.

the published translation translated "third party" as "after-after-party" every single time which is so drat stupid and makes me very angry at how bad it sounds. Yeah, it was difficult to think of something that isn't a mouthful, and "third party of the night" isn't perfect, but it's goddamn better than goddamn after-after-party lol.

Another note which confuses me slightly, is the specification that Kawaminami is a 3rd year 4th year next month, meaning what I guessed about everyone's years is wrong. That doesn't affect much except for I'm confused about Poe. I guess he's going to start a graduate program next month? Cuz as far as I know, Japanese university is 4 years. If someone knows better, please correct me.

So, like, I hope people are enjoying this besides just White Crane (i love you tho wc) and the couple peeps who posted to tell me theyre lurking. I know there's no real murder to rly have fun solving yet (at least not one happening in the present), but it's definitely already throwing tons of puzzle pieces at us. I'm not sure how many of them fit together yet, but this is what we'll have to work with as foundation once the murders start, so don't brush it off. I'm pretty sure we're gonna be referencing the pre-murder chapters quite a lot in the course of trying to solve them.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 18:51 on Apr 7, 2019

# ? Mar 30, 2019 09:25

Lord Zedd-Repulsa: Jul 21, 2007; Devour a good book.

Now poo poo's starting to get interesting. If the mysteries revolve around mahjong (is it one word or two? I've seen both), though, I'm hosed because I've never been able to make sense of the game and might have to change that. As far as names go, Hajime can also be written as "beginning" and Wikipedia lists other kanji with readings along similar lines. If there's one thing Japan loves, it's hidden meanings in character names so could you share how the ones we know so far are written and try to offer that as we readers learn them?

# ? Mar 30, 2019 09:49

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Lord Zedd-Repulsa posted:

If there's one thing Japan loves, it's hidden meanings in character names so could you share how the ones we know so far are written and try to offer that as we readers learn them?

I've been trying to mention the parts that stood out to me, but yeah I can give the full run-down so you're in the loop. Keep in mind that I have no idea what kinds of associations jpn readers might make with certain common names. I can really only notice what's not a normal kanji to see in names, or what's a weird pronunciation.

Nakamura: This family name is overwhelmingly average in both writing and pronunciation, so I doubt we'll find any clues in here, but for the sake of completion I'll explain how it's written. [naka] is a very very common word meaning "inside" and stuff that's abstractly tied to the concept of inside-ness but that's the case for literally every kanji that's not a straightforward noun. [mura] is also a very very common word meaning "town/village".

Seiji: [sei] is written with the kanji for "blue" (same as the one used in his creation, Blue Mansion, tho it's pronounced differently there), and has a normal pronunciation in the name. It is also associated with youth, and paleness (like pale skin may be described as "blue"). The [ji] part is just used in a lot of words concerning leadership, and it's also used a loooot in names. All it makes me think is that in-universe his parents wanted him to have leadership qualities.

Kazue: This is super common writing of a super common name. The first symbol is mainly used in words meaning "peace" and peaceful stuff, though I also just see it a lot in women's names. The only thing that might stand out to me about this name is that the second symbol is the same as the word for "branches" that was used in reference to the pine trees on the island.

Chiori: Another very typical pronunciation and writing. [chi] simply means a thousand, or just like all big numbers it's also sometimes used to just mean "many" but not that often cuz there are bigger numbers to use. [ori] is used to refer to textile weaving and stuff, and in one or two common words it's used abstractly for stuff like organizational structures. I don't really see a meaning there.

Kawaminami: His name is weird for being pronounced as just the flat out words "river south" instead of the alternate pronunciations which are what's usually used in names. I'm pretty sure any Japanese person would try to read his name as Kounan at first. Notably, the "river" part of his name is not written like the common word for river (which is pronounced kawa), but it's all but exclusively reserved for official names of very specific large rivers. Most importantly though (maybe?) is that it's one of the kanji in the word for "inlet" used a lot when talking about Horned Island.

Takaaki: Very typically pronounced/written surname. [taka] I've barely seen at all outside of names, but according to my dictionary I guess it has to do with respecting your elders. the [aki] means light/brightness. Pretty straightforward.
(edit: actually I'm pretty sure this is his given name since it's written 2nd when he's introduced, but he's always referred to as Kawaminami in the text, so shrug)

Higashi Hajime: This name is really stupid for being a full name that's a collective 2 whole kanji long. It also does the same thing as Kawaminami's name and gets pronounced as actual words. "East first" by pronunciation, or "east one" by writing.
(edit: I also want to point out the only reason I "know" Hajime is a boy is because of the honorifics Kawaminami used about him when talking to his mother. I find it highly unlikely that anyone would talk to a mother about her daughter and use -kun, but in the extremely unlikely event that Hajime turns out to be one of the girls, don't crucify me lol)

I'll do this from now on for new characters. Remind me if I miss any.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 14:23 on Mar 30, 2019

# ? Mar 30, 2019 10:50

rvm: May 6, 2013

I'm really enjoying the story.

Carr seems to have issues with booze. Chiori died of alcohol poisoning. I wonder if there's a connection. On the other hand, speaking of poisoning, we have Agatha who studies pharmacology.

And is Orczy's ring significant in any way? Maybe, it belonged to Chiory?

# ? Mar 30, 2019 14:51

Mr. Steak: May 9, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

In this update, we get namedropped real places for the first time. If it's not too annoying, I'm gonna link photos from google images so you guys can better visualize the settings (I did that for a bunch of other things too). I'll also arrange them all on a map of Japan for you at the end of the update, along with estimates of where places like O City and S Town might be.

quote:

2

Starting from S Town, where the members of K University mystery club had all departed, it was a half-hour bus ride plus forty minutes by train to reach O City. It was probably less than forty kilometers away in a straight line. From O City, it was a mere four kilometers to Kamegawa Station, where Kawaminami disembarked and headed up the mountain path facing the station.

He had phoned the household of Nakamura Chiori's grandfather, and once he announced that he was once Chiori's friend from school, the amicable older woman who'd answered the phone, most likely a household servant, had agreed to answer any questions.

He'd been too embarrassed to ask about the issue directly.

Eventually, he'd managed to indirectly confirm that Chiori's father was indeed the Nakamura Seiji of Horned Island, and then he'd also taken the opportunity to get the address of the younger brother, Nakamura Koujirou. The existence of a brother named Koujirou was intel he'd learned while studying his newspaper articles.

Apparently, Nakamura Koujirou currently resided in Kannawa, Beppu. Since he worked as a teacher in the local highschool, and it was spring break right now, Kawaminami figured he'd be at home.

Beppu was once where Kawaminami's family lived. So due to his own familiarity with the area, along with his innate curiosity bubbling up inside him, his ears had perked up at the location. Therefore---

Without even thinking to contact him first, Kawaminami had immediately decided set out for Koujirou's house.

Kannawa is home to the famous hot springs "Hells of Beppu". Beneath the cloudless sky, along the gutters of the hilly roads, and in the gaps between houses, white steam rose and hovered on the wind. Nearby on his left, a mountain stood like a black wall, Mount Tsurumi.

After passing through the small shopping district, the town quickly gets quieter. This was where many inns, and vacation houses meant for long stays were lined up one after the other.

Working with only the address he'd received on the phone, Kawaminami eventually found the house without much effort.

It was a single-story home with a calming aura. Past some short hedges, yellow enishida, white yukiyanagi, and pink sarasaboke flowers were all showing the signs of spring.

Kawaminami passed through a gate inlaid with a lattice door, and walked a stone path to the front door. After taking a deep breath, he pushed the doorbell. A short time later, a full baritone voice called from the other side.

"Who is it?" What appeared was a man dressed in a manner entirely inconsistent with the Japanese architecture. White open-necked shirt, brown cardigan, and grey flannel pants. His casually combed-back hair had a couple of grey ones mixed in.

"Are you Nakamura Koujirou?"

"Yes, and you are...?"

"Um... I was in the same school club as Nakamura Chiori. My name's Kawaminami. Sorry for showing up out of the blue."

Koujirou's horn-rimmed glasses softened his chiseled facial features.

"You mean the K University mystery club? ---What business do you have with me?"

"To tell the truth, I got a weird letter in the mail today." Kawaminami presented him the envelope. "This is it."

Koujirou took the letter and ran his eyes over the neatly spaced letters of the address information. Suddenly, his eyebrows jumped up and he looked back to Kawaminami. "Yes, come on in. I have a friend over, but please pay him no mind. I live alone, so I apologize for the lack of hospitality."

＊

quote:

Kawaminami was lead to a tatami room inside.

It was made of two six-tatami rooms connected in an L shape. The dividing screen had been removed, so it was being used as a single twelve-tatami room.

The front half seemed to form a living room-parlor combination. On the green-grey carpet were arranged sofas of a similar color. The interior half projected into the garden to the right, and appeared to be a study. He could see numerous bookshelves as high as the ceiling, and a large writing desk. The room was also tidy to the point that you wouldn't guess he lived alone.

"Shimada, we have a guest."

In the front half of the room, a veranda overlooked the garden. Sitting there in a wisteria-wood rocking chair was Koujirou's supposed friend.

"Kawaminami from the K University mystery club. This is my friend, Shimada Kiyoshi."

"Mystery club?" Shimada said, standing up vigorously. As he did, however, the force of the motion caused the rocking chair to swing back and hit him right in the shin, so he groaned and sat back down.

Tall and thin, he was an all-around lanky man. Kawaminami instantly associated him with a praying mantis.

"Well, I quit the club last year."

"So he told me."

"Hmm." Shimada was rubbing his foot in apparent pain. "So, why'd you come to Kou's place?"

"This," said Koujirou, handing Kawaminami's letter to Shimada. As soon as he saw the sender's name, the hand rubbing his foot suddenly froze, and he looked up at Kawaminami's face.

"May I read it?"

"Go ahead."

"Full disclosure, Kawaminami," Koujirou said. "A similar letter arrived here as well."

"Whaat?"

Koujirou walked over to his writing desk, picked up a single sealed letter from atop the red-brown desk mat, and handed it to Kawaminami.

Kawaminami wasted no time examining both sides of the envelope.

It was the same style of envelope as he had received, with an identical postmark and word processor writing as well. Of course, the name written for the sender was "Nakamura Seiji".

"Can I look inside?"

Koujirou nodded silently.

That was it. The content was different, but the appearance of high-quality B5 paper and word processor writing was the same.

Still staring down at the letter, Kawaminami stood there without speaking.

An inexplicable letter from a dead man. ----It had been easy to extrapolate from there that the letter had also been sent to all the members present at that party last year. But this man, Nakamura Koujirou, also receiving a similar letter, was harder to imagine.

"What the heck does this mean?"

"I haven't the slightest," Koujirou replied. "I'm also in shock. Well, I thought it was just an ill-natured prank. Shimada and I were just discussing whether anyone could be bored enough to do such a thing. But then you showed up."

"It wasn't just me, either. It sounds like the same letter got sent to all the members' houses."

"I see."

"Could it be, possibly ---- Oh, sorry, it's rude of me to suggest that your brother might be alive..."

"That's impossible." Koujirou definitively shook his head. "As you know, my brother died last fall. I was even made to identify the body. It was a grisly sight. ----I'm sorry Kawaminami, but I don't much want to remember that day."

"Sorry. ----So then, these letters were a prank after all?"

"I can't think of another explanation. My brother died half a year ago. That is undeniable fact. And I'm not the type to believe in ghosts."

"What do you think of the letters' contents?"

"That's---" Koujirou's expression became subtly darker. "I had heard about Chiori's death when it happened, and I considered it an accident. To me, Chiori was a precious niece, so I can understand feeling as if she'd been murdered, but even then, there's nothing to be gained from resenting you children. Quite the opposite, the one I can't forgive is whoever's impersonating my brother to distribute these prank letters."

"So they're pranks, huh?" He felt somehow disappointed with that answer.

Kawaminami hazily nodded in agreement, glancing sidelong at Shimada in his chair. He was sitting cross legged, elbow on one knee, and smiling straight at Kawaminami for some reason.

"By the way," Kawaminami asked, returning the letter to Koujirou. "Did you know that the other club members are on a trip to Horned Island right now?"

"Nope," Koujirou answered apathetically. "After my brother's death, I inherited that land and the estate, but last month I sold it to some businessman in S Town. He drove the price down a lot, but in the end I knew I would never go back there. Now, I don't care what happens to it.

--------
Photos of real places!

Kamegawa Station

Kannawa

Mount Tsurumi

Maps!

I circled where Kannawa generally is, and I put dots at the most likely coasts to depart from, based on the fact that it's approximately 40km from there. (also O City should be real close to the coast near Kannawa)

Kawaminami's path to Koujirou's house was probably something like this.

edit: I forgot to do the new names!

Koujirou: the [jirou] part of this is so un-noteworthy that I'm not gonna bother talking about it. there are a billion names that end with that sound written like this. The [kou] however is interesting. It's not *the* word for red, that you'd use normally, but it is *a* word for red. Like a deep, rich red. The point is it contrasts with Seiji's "blue" name so idk what that's about.

Shimada: again the [da] part is literally at the end of a hundred billion names, but the [shima] part would make anybody's sensors go off. Cuz it is literally the word for "island" lol.

Kiyoshi: Apparently this is Shimada's given name? This is another case of the narration using his surname cuz I guess none of his family will ever be named in the novel. This kanji is associated with cleanliness (spiritual and physical) and manliness.

Mr. Steak fucked around with this message at 23:21 on Mar 31, 2019

# ? Mar 30, 2019 19:11

Hobnob: Feb 23, 2006; Ursa Adorandum

Just want to chime in and say I'm enjoying this thread so far. Reminds me an awful lot of the old The Butler Did It thread, where incidentally one of the books we solved was Christie's And Then There Were None (aka Ten Little Indians).

Hobnob fucked around with this message at 03:02 on Mar 31, 2019

# ? Mar 31, 2019 00:17

OscarDiggs: Jun 1, 2011; Those sure are words on pages which are given in a sequential order!

This seems like a very interesting thread! I shall do my best to read along but I make no guarantees about my skill as a mystery solver.

# ? Mar 31, 2019 00:47

TalkLittle: Jun 23, 2004

This is a cool story and I trust my Danganronpa experience will serve me well here.

I bet Leroux will be first to die. I'm basing this on their ages, which I am assuming correspond with their enrolled years in school. Can't kill Orczy first because of the gender ratio imbalance.

Refresher on their school class years:

Orczy - 2nd year literature
Leroux - 2nd year literature
Carr - 3rd year law
Ellery - 3rd year law
Agatha - 3rd year pharmacology
Van - 3rd year science
Poe - 4th year medicine

Kawaminami - 3rd year
Chiori - 1 year below Kawaminami = 2nd year, if she were alive

# ? Mar 31, 2019 16:38

take the moon: Feb 13, 2011; by sebmojo

v good thread. will be happily reading along

take the moon fucked around with this message at 17:14 on Mar 31, 2019

# ? Mar 31, 2019 16:54

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 25, 2024 21:49

Goatse James Bond: Mar 28, 2010; If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

this got mentioned in enkidel saga discord and looks cool, i'll keep an eye on this

# ? Mar 31, 2019 18:53

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > Lets Solve: The Decagon House Murders

«‹›6 »