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I grew up in Canada, and on one of our cable channels called YTV (basically Canadian Nickelodeon) there used to be a music video countdown show called 'The Hit List' hosted by this guy called Tarzan Dan. For some reason when I was a little kid I thought the show was called 'The Hitler', and one day I called it that in front of my mom and she got really mad at me. I had no idea who Hitler even was! I'm pretty sure how that came about was I saw the scene in the Simpsons episode 'Bart Carny' where Bart crashes Hitler's car. Since 'Hitler' and 'Hit List' sound similar, I guess I assumed the car belonged to the guy who hosted the show and that he was 'The Hitler'? I dunno, it's just funny how when you're a little kid your brain makes weird connections like that even when there's lots of evidence to the contrary. So what weird poo poo did you guys believe when you were kids?
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Apr 2, 2019 12:27
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I went to the planetarium as a kid and saw a movie that explained the Sun would eventually turn into a red giant and swallow up the Earth in several billion years. I had a lot of confused ideas about the afterlife and believed Hell was in the center of the Earth and Heaven was floating around the Earth, so I became absolutely terrified that my immortal soul would be roasted alive by the expanding Sun. I also believed in ghosts and feared that if I became a ghost I'd be floating around in the empty space where the Earth used to be. For some reason as a ghost I'd survive this, but as an angel I'd die. I barely slept for 3 days after this and got some really mixed up ideas about mortality and existence.
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Apr 2, 2019 12:38
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There was an after school show called “Happy’s Place” with a clown. Possibly called “Froggy’s Pad. It was so long ago. Anyway, it was really easy to get in the audience and get on tv. But they would show old school Power Rangers and VR Troopers. And I was sad because I thought they were made in Fort Wayne and no other kids in other cities or countries would get to experience the awesomeness of them. And that I would see them in public.
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Apr 2, 2019 13:24
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When I was a kid I thought that ghosts were boy angels and angels were girl ghosts
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Apr 2, 2019 13:46
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I knew Santa Claus was a real, historical saint but grasped the inherent problems of the whole “all gifts in one night” thing. The delusion I forced myself to swallow (knowing that kids who didn’t believe in Santa were always the bad guys in Christmas specials) was that Santa worked like any other saint. Parents could pray for him to intercede and, in return, receive divinely inspired gift ideas that they could then use. I had this very clear image in my head of those old paintings of my parents with flames above their head like the Apostles after receiving the Holy Spirit. QuoProQuid fucked around with this message at 13:50 on Apr 2, 2019 |
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Apr 2, 2019 13:47
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Mr. Bones posted:I grew up in Canada, and on one of our cable channels called YTV (basically Canadian Nickelodeon) there used to be a music video countdown show called 'The Hit List' hosted by this guy called Tarzan Dan. For some reason when I was a little kid I thought the show was called 'The Hitler', and one day I called it that in front of my mom and she got really mad at me. I had no idea who Hitler even was! I wasn't an idiot, so nothing.
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Apr 2, 2019 13:50
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I don't remember, nor do I care to recall any. Stupid idiot OP.
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Apr 2, 2019 13:52
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I believed that I saw a news report about a UFO crashing in New York and the investigators finding a room full of baby carriages in there. Like hundreds of baby carriages with designs going back 100+ years, with the implication being that these aliens had been abducting babies for generations by just grabbing them off the street somehow. This proved that aliens were real and hostile but we didn't find any bodies, so either it was an unmanned ship or they had escaped. I was like 5 years old and I have no idea what movies jumbled up in my brain to create this weird idea.
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Apr 2, 2019 13:52
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I thought for a good while that girls don't poop. Obviously I found out eventually, plus SWAP.avi was proof enough.
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Apr 2, 2019 13:55
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I thought the world was a good place, lol joke's on me.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:04
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I thought girls had a penis but no balls when I was like 7. Turned out I was more right than wrong.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:07
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I thought the nearby airport was for going to the Moon and that we had cities on the Moon. I don't think I had a concept of other planets though I must have. I wanted to be a space pilot when I grew up. I also thought airplanes were spaceships I remember telling my mom all about how I saw a spaceship coming back. I probably did this multiple times and she never told me I was wrong. I'm not sure what I was going to do as a space pilot I never thought that far, but I guess space trucker or space bus driver. It seemed really cool as a kid, but that'd probably be a really lovely job.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:10
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Colonel Cancer posted:I thought girls had a penis but no balls when I was like 7. Turned out I was more right than wrong. I thought girls had balls but just a hole where the penis would be.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:19
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:I thought girls had balls but just a hole where the penis would be. I thought they peed out their butt
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Apr 2, 2019 14:31
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pixaal posted:I thought they peed out their butt You thought airplanes flew into space and wanted a career doing it, even though you didn't think other planets existed. I'm not sure what you thought you'd be doing all day, I'm not about to take your advice on what does or doesn't go on regarding women's balls and how they poo poo, alright? This is too important to get wrong again.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:37
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Big Beef City posted:You thought airplanes flew into space and wanted a career doing it, even though you didn't think other planets existed. I'm not sure what you thought you'd be doing all day, I'm not about to take your advice on what does or doesn't go on regarding women's balls and how they poo poo, alright? This is too important to get wrong again. I was like 4 or 5, when you don't really think about a job as being more than "something you do" I just wanted to play spaceships.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:40
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I used to think people would grow up and be successful.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:40
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I thought cold blooded creatures always felt like it was hot out because their internal temperature matched the environment. Similar to how we feel when it's 98.6 degrees. There was some exam question about cold blooded and warm blooded creatures that I answered with something like that, and I remember getting it wrong but the teacher writing "creative!" I was pretty annoyed because we had never been taught the correct answer and it's not self-evident that all living creatures experience the world the same way. Khorne fucked around with this message at 14:54 on Apr 2, 2019 |
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Apr 2, 2019 14:44
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Whenever my dad would talk about his boss at work, I pictured a short man (a dwarf), dressed in a top hat and tuxedo. And I would inexplicably have fears that if I slept with my feet poking out from the blankets, this dwarf figure would come into my room and chop my feet off with an axe. Guess who still cannot sleep at night with any extremities exposed?
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Apr 2, 2019 14:52
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Guess you could say I was a pretty "deep" little dude. I thought alot about life, but even more about death.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:54
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I used to think that wearing a suit everyday and working constantly were like, the coolest things a person could do. I’d see men and women on planes or trains furiously typing away on laptops or taking complicated phone calls and honestly think “Wow, they’re so cool. I bet they feel so awesome working like that.” Lol.
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Apr 2, 2019 14:55
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i also thought the Berlin Wall stretched across the entire border of east and west germany like an idiot
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Apr 2, 2019 14:59
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Hammerite posted:When I was a kid I thought that ghosts were boy angels and angels were girl ghosts This is true.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:00
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When I was a kid I thought being an adult would be awesome. Ha!
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Apr 2, 2019 15:05
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pixaal posted:I was like 4 or 5, when you don't really think about a job as being more than "something you do" I just wanted to play spaceships. Somehow you managed to be wrong about being wrong about what jobs are on top of all the other things you've been wrong about and I'm still freaking out about your girl balls and their poop situation so you're not really gaining any ground here. There's times when I wonder if you even WANT to be in this line of work.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:06
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Mooey Cow posted:This is true. Yeah, I was a pretty smart kid to be fair
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Apr 2, 2019 15:07
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I thought I would just float down to the ground if I jumped off the roof using a trash bag as a parachute. No.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:43
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I'd play super hard NES games, like Zelda 2, and be totally fine with not getting anywhere (I didn't understand the spell system because I couldn't read). Like I'd visit both starting towns a few times, go into the palace, die a bunch, and then, without any frustration whatsoever, turn off the game only to come back later and do it all again, and that was Zelda 2 to me, back in the late 80s. I actually didn't think about the game again until around 2002, and immediately thought "wait... I loved that game, and haven't played it since I actually learned how to understand and play games. I should check it out again" and it was a whole new experience, holy poo poo. More than 15 minutes of gameplay!
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Apr 2, 2019 15:46
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"I can't wait to live in a cool, peaceful, future world where people don't murder each other over fairy tails and money"
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Apr 2, 2019 15:48
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i used to think anytime there was a weather warning on a local station that they were running a contest to give away rad thunderstorm and tornado watches. i remember asking my dad what number i had to call to enter.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:51
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Adults can read minds. You'll learn how to when you get old enough.
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Apr 2, 2019 15:52
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I use to think my parents loved me
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Apr 2, 2019 16:57
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My grandpa plays golf, and yet I don't see him playing golf on TV... why?
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Apr 2, 2019 16:58
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pixaal posted:I thought they peed out their butt they do when i'm through with 'em.
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Apr 2, 2019 17:06
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i don't remember why, but i thought tears were a product of gravity getting stronger and pulling them out of your eyes. i would wear kneepads when i was sad.
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Apr 2, 2019 17:18
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Robokomodo posted:There was an after school show called “Happy’s Place” with a clown. i didnt like it
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Apr 2, 2019 17:31
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A Fancy Hat posted:I went to the planetarium as a kid and saw a movie that explained the Sun would eventually turn into a red giant and swallow up the Earth in several billion years. Haha! Similarly, I used to avoid the Science Channel (my mother was weird and all we could watch was documentary channels - in retrospect she's a genius because that meant that when we were unsupervised we just watched cartoons instead of poo poo we really shouldn't have been watching as kids) because all of the space shows about how the universe would end made me really uncomfortable. Nevermind the fact that it's on a timescale far longer than my life, or even the total existence of humanity. Kids worry about stupid poo poo.
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Apr 2, 2019 17:37
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QuoProQuid posted:i also thought the Berlin Wall stretched across the entire border of east and west germany like an idiot There was a fortified inner German border with fences and landmines so you really weren't far off.
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Apr 2, 2019 17:57
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:I'd play super hard NES games, like Zelda 2, and be totally fine with not getting anywhere (I didn't understand the spell system because I couldn't read). Like I'd visit both starting towns a few times, go into the palace, die a bunch, and then, without any frustration whatsoever, turn off the game only to come back later and do it all again, and that was Zelda 2 to me, back in the late 80s. Same except for Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4. My mind was blown that you could go on top of buildings. So I would just start up the game, get up on a building, rock out to the tunes, and turn it off. Still one of my favorite series.
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Apr 2, 2019 18:09
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P-Mack posted:There was a fortified inner German border with fences and landmines so you really weren't far off. Haha SOMEBODY'S parents tricked them into not wandering across the border into East Germany lmao
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Apr 2, 2019 18:09
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