its like a were wolf but you turn into a white person when the moon is full

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > its like a were wolf but you turn into a white person when the moon is full

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cda: by Hand Knit

wake up with a vague feeling of having been priveleged for the last three days and a coupon for a half price manscaping at the local salon

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:11

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 09:44

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

wake up after blacking out for several days, wondering where this smart pair of slacks i'm wearing came from

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:13

Macnult

[looks up at moon] �oh god I gotta get home�

*police officer smiles and waves in passing*

�this is bad this is bad this is bad�

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:13

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

Macnult posted:

[looks up at moon] �oh god I gotta get home�

*police officer smiles and waves in passing*

�this is bad this is bad this is bad�

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:14

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

realize i have no idea where i've been for the past week, check my social media and see i've made a dozen posts with pictures of me surrounded by starving african children who are posing for the pic in an attempt to get a small piece of candy from me, recoiling from the images and sucking in air through my teeth...

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:15

cda: by Hand Knit

it all started when i kissed my dog on the mouth by mistake

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:18

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

awaking in a meadow in my Sunday best clutching a Panera receipt...

NOT AGAIN :negative:

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:18

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

cda posted:

it all started when i kissed my dog on the mouth by mistake

opioid agonist posted:

walking up in a meadow in my Sunday best clutching a Panera receipt...

NOT AGAIN

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:19

Goons Are Gifts

opioid agonist posted:

awaking in a meadow in my Sunday best clutching a Panera receipt...

NOT AGAIN

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:20

Resting Lich Face: This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.

who the gently caress ordered these Uggs?

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:20

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

Resting Lich Face posted:

who the gently caress ordered these Uggs?

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:21

alnilam

Macnult posted:

[looks up at moon] “oh god I gotta get home”

*police officer smiles and waves in passing*

“this is bad this is bad this is bad”

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:30

Goons Are Gifts

Macnult posted:

[looks up at moon] “oh god I gotta get home”

*police officer smiles and waves in passing*

“this is bad this is bad this is bad”

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:31

Resting Lich Face: This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.

E: nvm might vaguely be political

# ? Apr 7, 2019 22:48

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

GOD DAMMIT I'M SOME OF MY OWN BEST FRIENDS

# ? Apr 8, 2019 00:38

ghost emoji: oooOooOOOooh

y-you gotta chain me up in my basement, dude. swear to god, every full moon, i watch all of Parks and Rec and make viral facebook posts threatening my daughters' potential boyfriends

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# ? Apr 8, 2019 01:20

FactsAreUseless

You must stop me, or I will transform into a horrible creature, a Vampire [hacking cough] Weekend fan!

# ? Apr 8, 2019 01:40

FactsAreUseless

*transforms into someone white enough to know which Tina Fey show used this same premise*

# ? Apr 8, 2019 01:41

Macnult

everyone looks at me in horror as I crack open another lacroix. �there�s no way it�s a country song,� I say in between sips, �like yeah the country-related subject matter is there, but that�s a full on trap beat.�

# ? Apr 8, 2019 03:14

super sweet best pal

Stop me before I buy Hamilton tickets!

# ? Apr 8, 2019 03:58

Stoner Sloth

*Wakes up with no memory of having "discovered" and "colonized" the neighbours yard and house, stolen their children to "civilize them" and then having written a lengthy letter to the newspaper editor about why I shouldn't have to apologize and complaining that the neighbours shouldn't get welfare while they struggle to get by without a house because I earned everything I have gosh darn it*

sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut, Heather Papps,Prof Crocodile, knuthgrush, Ohtori Akio, Teapot, Saosyhant, Dumb Sex Parrot, w4ddl3d33, and nesamdoom!! - ty friends!

# ? Apr 8, 2019 04:11

Resting Lich Face: This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.

Found a traffic citation in my glove box. Just a warning.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 05:51

roomforthetuna: I don't need to know anything about virii! My CUSTOM PROGRAM keeps me protected! It's not like they'll try to come in through the Internet or something!

I tried to keep away from society by having the police lock me up, but when the full moon came around they just let me out.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 06:43

Resting Lich Face: This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.

roomforthetuna posted:

I tried to keep away from society by having the police lock me up, but when the full moon came around they just let me out.

Sorry for the confusion, sir.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 06:47

FluffieDuckie

Resting Lich Face posted:

Sorry for the confusion, sir.

Thank you for the beautiful sig Machai!

# ? Apr 8, 2019 07:19

Goons Are Gifts

It's so weird to be beaten up by police men and them being charged with a crime when sun sets.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 10:30

cda: by Hand Knit

roomforthetuna posted:

I tried to keep away from society by having the police lock me up, but when the full moon came around they just let me out.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 11:23

google THIS

A set of ordinary human footprints going down an urban sidewalk. Then, suddenly...well, they don't change appearance or anything but they start furtively crossing the street for no apparent reason every so often.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 15:26

Finger Prince

It starts with a thirst. Each month, a slight headache, pasty mouth, and a slowly intensifying thirst. For hydration. I can't ignore it. It drives me outside, into the cold, the heat, into the rain. I feel these things, the sweat clinging to me, not wicking away. The rain soaking into my clothes. The cold bracing my skin, unprotected by any synthetic polymer insulation.
I am driven by need to the one place that can ease these weaknesses of the flesh.
REI they call it.
I howl -
"oooowwwwwwwoooooooooo loving much? $450 for a rain jacket? Oh but it's Gore-Tex. And look, 5 way flex. Gusseted under-arms, for articulation when climbing. God I wish Arc'teryx wasn't so expensive. Wait a sec, this Black Diamond one is on clearance!"

# ? Apr 8, 2019 15:36

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

I only eat the faces of those foolish enough to call me Chad

# ? Apr 8, 2019 15:42

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

google THIS posted:

A set of ordinary human footprints going down an urban sidewalk. Then, suddenly...well, they don't change appearance or anything but they start furtively crossing the street for no apparent reason every so often.

# ? Apr 8, 2019 15:45

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

**marks the calendar on the days my skin will be ashy but no one will notice**

# ? Apr 8, 2019 16:33

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

waking up with no memory of last knight, horror slowly dawns on me as i shake off some kale on my arm. it's everywhere

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Apr 8, 2019 16:42

cda: by Hand Knit

Splatmaster posted:

**marks the calendar on the days my skin will be ashy but no one will notice**

# ? Apr 8, 2019 17:02

Manifisto

Nosfereefer posted:

waking up with no memory of last knight, horror slowly dawns on me as i shake off some kale on my arm. it's everywhere

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Apr 8, 2019 17:50

blaise rascal: "Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."

They say that werewhite people spread their curse to anyone who unwittingly takes a bite of their fiendishly bland homemade potato salad

ty vanisher, ty khanstant

# ? Apr 8, 2019 19:15

Jedrick: There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high-powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.
Smoke weed every day.

Look upon the moon and howl "Mayooooo!"

# ? Apr 8, 2019 19:30

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Backing out of Summer weekend cookouts to avoid embarrassment for everyone because it's "that time of the month".

# ? Apr 8, 2019 19:51

Resting Lich Face: This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.

Oh hey leftover spaghetti!

... wait...

... are these... hot dogs?!

# ? Apr 8, 2019 19:57

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 09:44

Peg Sliderskew

I pile dozens of blackboards with lists of phonetically spelled made up names onto the fire and pray I didn't post any facebook photos of myself posing next to them this time.

The name Lakyyn, resplendent in a jaunty pastel font, is consumed all too slowly by the flames.

Courtesy of Manifisto

# ? Apr 8, 2019 20:07

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > its like a were wolf but you turn into a white person when the moon is full

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