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So, today's the last day to spend XP,  here's who I still don't have instructions from. If you don't want to spend XP, that's fine, just making sure you're aware in case you do.Hero Souls, led by Sezethsiel "The Stone Snake" Ezlanti (played by Tias) The Menagerie, led by Marquise Adelina Francesca de Neraglia (played by paradoxGentleman) Demon Clergy Traveling Tavern, led by Libationer Hu (played by AnAnonymousIdiot) The Slam Sector, led by Waroduce (played by Waroduce) The Stakehouse, led by Root Krass (played by Tyrannosaurus) Also, I would like approvals or denials from the following relating to the fight change requests in from Slamonomicon and WWWF, if you don't post, that's a denial and the fight request will not go through.Stoned People's Army Fivefold Way Monastery Most Noble Order of the Squared Circle Brawler's Parliament
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May 5, 2019 06:57
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 03:48 |
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The Most Noble Order of the Square Circle will agree to this trade proposed by the druid Brackenleaf. We have heard that this goblin Konka is a thief, stealing sacred scrolls from a monastery. It is a task fit for the Order to punish such a thief.
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May 5, 2019 11:51
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The Marquise does not tell her fighters to train, as she went on a two day bender and is currently recovering from a literally infernal hangover. Clerics have been summoned. The Menagerie is on its own for now.
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May 5, 2019 22:16
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Training Barend Fireforge: 9 xp -> nothing -> 9 xp Beloril Froodfist: 14 xp -> improve heart -> 4 xp Lana Surge: 10 xp -> increase signature -> 4 xp -> increase primary offense -> 1 xp Merigold Goodbarrel: 12 -> xp nothing -> 12 xp Nurkara Morigackt: 15 xp -> improve countering -> 0 xp Oceanus Beten: 7 xp -> nothing -> 4 xp Sanni Torunn: 4 xp -> nothing -> 4 xp Sassang Mem: 10 xp -> improve chin -> 0 xp Tani Buzun: 21 -> increase finishing -> 1 xp Vees: 9 xp -> increase primary offense -> 6 xp increase primary offense -> 3 xp increase primary offense -> 0 xp
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May 6, 2019 06:05
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The request delivered to the Brawler’s Parliament is responded to with a single sheet of paper, containing an incredibly small and precise checkmark in the upper-left of the sheet.
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May 6, 2019 06:38
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BIZZARE STAT UPDATES FOR FANTASY MARTIAL ARTS (LIBATIONER HU'S DEMON CLERGY TRAVELING TAVERN) by Autumn Wreath **************************** Qaruk - Laikat refinement (3) & Signature (6) Welby Reedfellow - Heart(15) Shel - Signature (6) & Laikat Refinement (3) Deler Glanhig - Heart - (10) Mahil - Aehamar Refinement(6) & Laikat refinement (3)(3) Baarada of Jerxomonis - Faereisliesen(3) & Signature (6) Tarhiel of Qaxparrgh -Heart(15) & Chin(10) Harael -Laikat Refinement (3)(3) & Signature (6)
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May 6, 2019 23:24
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Database locked! Fights start now. With no response from Stoned People's Army, Heward Hawthrone vs Traula Netyoive and Drifting Smoke in the Fragile Storm vs Aldous Whitney STAND UNCHANGED. With approvals from both parties required, Konka vs Scah and Aston Quillsharpener vs Ribeh SHALL CHANGE to Aston Quillsharpener vs Scah and Konka vs Ribeh. I was unable to raise Shautha Rudescar's (Order of the Emerald Flame) Finishing, she is in fact one point short. The spreadsheet has not been updated. I will update it once the first fights have been posted. I do need to ask - PLEASE POST IF YOU USE YOUR PERSONAL TAB ON THE FIGHTER SPREADSHEET. Pulling out those tabs is a minor headache, so I would like to make them opt-in.
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May 7, 2019 00:42
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I use my personal tab on the spreadsheet.
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May 7, 2019 01:28
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I use mine, too!
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May 7, 2019 01:30
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I found mine very useful.
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May 7, 2019 01:36
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I use mine as well.
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May 7, 2019 02:15
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I enjoy the use of my personal tab.
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May 7, 2019 02:34
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I don't use mine, using the filter works fine for me.
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May 7, 2019 02:54
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I use mine
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May 7, 2019 03:24
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I've been using mine, but if it's more convenient for you to get rid of all them, I can adjust.
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May 7, 2019 03:47
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I see it, I just don't know what to do with it.
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May 7, 2019 04:04
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I used it to generate my own spreadsheet, but now that I have that I can easily name filter for updates and don't need the tab any longer.
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May 7, 2019 05:12
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I would like to keep mine unless it sidelines the game.
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May 7, 2019 05:15
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I used mine as well! It was very helpful.
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May 7, 2019 05:36
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I can always make a copy of the big sheet for myself if need be if it's causing an issue
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May 7, 2019 13:20
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AnAnonymousIdiot posted:I see it, I just don't know what to do with it. Me either. I saw I had Y exp and just did upgrades based on that. If that's all it's used for then I won't need it.
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May 7, 2019 13:41
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The Alabaster Openers at Lop Island (Grautreme 3rd, 1219) It’s a clear day out on Lop Island, if a little on the nippy side. The House has set up braziers to help the fighters deal with the chill, and the locals are enjoying the attention. There’s only been one mauling all day, which means we’re ahead of the curve - a most auspicious beginning. Our judges for this event will be  Orryn Silverthread,  Leshanna Selevarun, and  Torbera Lutgehr. The diviners have rated today’s matchups at one loaded die out of ten, a staggeringly low margin of potential chicanery.Beba (Slam Sector) vs Zanna Umden (Path of Fire and Shadow) The two fighters feel each other out, and after a few exchanges, Beba connects with a flying kick to the head, and the fight goes to the ground. There’s a scramble, Beba lets go of a guillotine and Zanna is forced to abandon an armbar. They’re struggling on the ground, and Zanna creates some distance and rolls away back to her feet, but Beba connects with a single-leg that picks Zanna off the ground, and as they come back down Beba switches to a kneebar, and Zanna taps out. Beba wins over Zanna Umden by Submission due to a Kneebar after two minutes and twenty-one seconds of the first round. Beba: Submission of the Night! Career +2, Experience +5. Zanna Umden: Career -1, Experience +1. Bero Melorel (House) vs Chadei Haurineth (Path of Fire and Shadow) Chadei takes things down to the ground immediately, and Bero seizes a leg but chooses to escape back to the feet. The two exchange a few shots, and Bero takes it back to the ground with a double leg, and opens a cut on Chadei’s forehead. Chadei tries to escape, but Bero picks her up as he attempts to escape and slams her back down, where they stay for the rest of the round. Bero is very active with submission attempts, and Chadei is defending but not creating any opportunities. With less than a minute to go, Bero locks in a triangle choke, and supplements it with excellent hammerfists. The Guide is clearly thinking about stopping the fight, but Chadei survives until the end of the round. All three judges score the round 10-9 in favor of Bero Melorel. The next round starts with a tentative exchange on the feet before Bero shoots in. Chadei grabs Bero by the throat to stop from going to the ground, and the Guide steps in to separate the fighters and warn Chadei. They start back up, and Bero slips, letting Chadei dive into side control and deliver some punishing elbows. Bero uses the cage to work his way free and they exchange submission attempts before Chadei works her way back to the feet. Bero tries to drop her down again with some clinch wrestling, but Chadei accidentally headbutts him and opens a cut on Bero’s forehead. The Guide steps in again and this time deducts a point. The blood is in Bero’s eyes quite badly, but he defends well before managing to get the fight back down. Both fighters are very active on the ground, but neither one can lock in a submission before the gong. Accounting for the Guide’s deduction, all three judges score the round 9-9, technically in favor of Chadei Haurineth. Leshanna Selevarun appears to be making the jerk-off motion behind her desk. The third and final round opens with a clinch takedown from Bero, but Chadei rolls with it and comes away with an arm triangle which becomes a rear naked choke over the course of a minute or so. Eventually Chadei is forced to let it go, and Bero rolls out to his feet. Bero again goes for clinch and tries to force a flying triangle choke, but Chadei throws him off and comes away with a magnificent heel hook for her trouble, which she works for almost a minute before letting go. Bero almost catches her in a triangle, and the crowd is roaring for blood, but Chadei escapes and tees off on Bero on the feet for the last ten or twenty seconds of the round. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Chadei Haurineth. The combined score is 28-28, a resounding draw, and the crowd roars louder. Chadei Haurineth has no-one but herself to blame for that deduction, if it hadn’t been for the earlier foul the ref might have let her off with a warning. Bero Melorel and Chadei Haurineth draw after three rounds. Bero Melorel: Experience +2. Chadei Haurineth: Experience +2. Driinda of Phyraphynsh (Dick Kickers) vs Guy Grove (Most Noble Order of the Squared Circle) Driinda and Guy come out slowly and tap gloves. Driinda lands a solid kick to the midsection, and Guy grabs it and shoots in. Driinda rolls with it and there’s an extended scramble. Guy has a hold of a promising omoplata for a while, but Driinda escapes to her feet and catches Guy as he comes up with a devastating flying knee. Guy manages to grab ahold of her again and get her on the ground, but is unable to make anything happen before Driinda springs back to her feet and catches him again as he comes up with an uppercut. Guy clinches with her and tries to wrestle her back to the ground, but Driinda is teeing off on his head with hooks and elbows, and as he lets go, she fires a front kick straight into his stomach and he drops. Driinda wraps one arm around his midsection as he turtles up, trying to survive to the gong, but her arm is relentless, and the Guide is forced to stop the match amid the cheers of the crowd - and Torbera Lutgehr, it seems. Driinda of Phyraphynsh wins over Guy Grove by Technical Knockout due to Strikes after four minutes and forty-nine seconds of the first round. Driinda of Phyraphynsh: Career +1, Experience +4. Guy Grove: Career -1, Experience +1. Clunk (Dick Kickers) vs Igor Goodearth (Brawler’s Parliament) It’s unclear who takes down whom, but both fighters are trying for submissions within the first ten seconds. Clunk appears to have taken the fall badly, but soldiers on, and fortunately, Igor accidentally grabs the fence and forgets to let go. The Guide stands the fighters up and gives Igor a warning as a result, and the two trade blows eagerly for a few seconds before stumbling back and feeling each other out for an extended period. The two have the same idea and attempt to duck under each other’s uppercuts, which works to neither’s advantage. Igor makes a clearly involuntary noise and the Guide stops the fight to check Igor’s jaw, which would later turn out to be fractured, but he manages to fool the Guide. Igor takes the offense for the remainder of the round, perhaps to keep from taking any more blows on the chin, but gets a good clobbering from Clunk’s right hand and again grabs the fence to stay upright. The Guide stops the fight to deduct a point, and the two fighters trade blows until the gong. All three judges score the fight 9-9, technically in favor of Igor Goodearth. The second round is very brief. Igor comes out rushing, and Clunk plants his feet and swings for all he’s worth. The blow lands directly on Igor’s jaw, and he crashes to the canvas. The Master of the House, sitting atop his traditional elevated throne, appears to be having what must be termed “a guffaw”. Clunk wins over Igor Goodearth by Knockout due to a Punch after twelve seconds of the second round. Clunk: Knockout of the Night! Career +2, Experience +5. Igor Goodearth: Career -1, Experience +1. Traula Netyoive (Stoned People’s Army) vs Heward Hawthorne (Slamonomicon) Both fighters come out on the attack, trading kicks and punches. Traula is pushing the pace, but Heward is defending excellently, and Traula pulls guard to try to work for a leg lock. Heward picks her up and drops her hard, and they work on the ground fruitlessly for a minute, neither able to advance position. Heward eventually backs off and waves her to her feet, and they each make solid exchanges, including a particularly good uppercut from Traula and a hook from Heward. Traula eventually loads up on a heavy right, and Heward’s forward hand winds up poking her in the eye. The Guide rules it inadvertent and issues a warning to Heward to watch his forward hands, and the fight continues. Heward decides to try to take the fight back to the ground, and wrestles Traula down. They exchange ground and pound until the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 in favor of Heward Hawthorne. Both fighters come out strong again, but Traula picks up a slight edge just before an accidental head collision. The Guide rules it inadvertent and the fight continues. Traula takes it into the clinch, and looks like she’s thinking about pulling guard before Heward breaks out of the clinch with a mean uppercut, which unfortunately creates the distance she needs for a good head kick. Heward backs away quickly and re-engages, lighting Traula up with several good jabs as she backs up. Heward pushes her against the cage and clinches again, and Traula works shots around him into the back of his head. The Guide issues a warning to stop, but Traula continues hitting him, and after an additional warning, stops the fight and declares a disqualification due to ignoring his instructions. The crowd boos, and Heward remarks several times that he didn’t think the blows were very hard. The Herald of the House appears to be making his way over to the Stoned People’s Army’s section, and he doesn’t look pleased. Heward Hawthorne wins over Traula Netyoive by Disqualification due to Ignoring the Guide’s Instructions at four minutes and thirteen seconds of the second round. Traula Netyoive: Career -4, Experience +1. Heward Hawthorne: Experience +3. Shautha Rudescar (Order of the Emerald Flame) vs Paatrin of Vartheturgys (Menagerie) Shautha taps Paatrin with a straight right hand, which he walks through to wrap his arms around her head and pulls her to the ground in a tight choke. Shautha defends it well, and works to half guard, dropping shots on Paatrin as he tries to work for an arm. It doesn’t go as well as he hopes, and Shautha is clearly starting to get the better of him with her hammerfists. He escapes to his feet, and trades a few shots with Shautha before they start stalking each other. Eventually, Paatrin abandons his tepid offense and throws her to the ground. She seizes an armlock and uses it to escape, and he almost immediately slams her down again. She escapes again, and Paatrin eats a mean body blow for his trouble. Paatrin looks to be tiring, and Shautha closes the round strong. The judges score the round 10-9 for Shautha Rudescar. Shautha comes out with a purpose, and Paatrin tries and fails to dissuade her with a technically excellent spinning back kick. She walks through it and drops a hard shot from clinch range, and blocks the return shot. Paatrin tries to clinch up in preparation for a throw, and Shautha counters hard with a body blow. Paatrin staggers back and tries to go on the offensive, but Shautha is taking everything he tries and firing back harder. The exchange continues for almost two full minutes, with Paatrin taking more and more damage. Finally, Shautha lands a jab on his chin as he’s backing up, and he falls back. She jumps all over him and rains down hammerfists. Paatrin is trying to defend, but the Guide yells instructions to defend, and Paatrin just can’t keep up. After almost thirty seconds on the ground, the Guide throws himself in between them, and the crowd jumps to their feet. Shautha Rudescar wins over Paatrin of Vartheturgys by Technical Knockout due to Strikes at three minutes and nineteen seconds of the second round. Shautha Rudescar: Fight of the Night! Career +2, Experience +4. Paatrin of Vartheturgys: Fight of the Night! Experience +1. Qaurk (Demon Clergy Traveling Tavern) vs Vrikka (Rough and Tumbles) Vrikka comes out shooting, and wedges Qaurk up against the cage, fighting for a takedown which she eventually gets. Vrikka works a kimura for a little while, but lets it go, and Qaurk eventually escapes back to his feet. He punishes Vrikka with an excellent uppercut, but Vrikka counters with another takedown and the two wage a war on the ground. Vrikka delivers excellent shots, but Qaurk keeps escaping and securing position. Both fighters are defending very proficiently, and to be honest, while it’s very technical, it’s not very exciting to watch. A number of members of the crowd seize the opportunity to take a concessions break. They miss the very end of the round, where Vrikka escapes and may be said to have stolen it away with a last-second and desperate flying kick that leaves Qaurk flat on the mat, gasping, but saved by the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Vrikka. Both fighters take it straight to the mat again, both fighting for submissions before Vrikka secures an excellent sweep off of Qaurk’s poor posture while throwing a left hand that never lands. Qaruk is quick to reverse the reversal, although Vrikka doggedly holds onto an armbar, making Qaruk sweat. The two continue a technical battle on the mat. Highlights include a slam escape from Vrikka, and a slick sweep while defending a kneebar from Qaurk, but it’s a slog. Both fighters are exhaausted, but Qaurk starts to limber up towards the end of the round, finally keeping Vrikka on the bottom while hammering her with shots right up until the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Qaurk. They keep it standing for a little while this time. Qaurk gets the better of Vrikka on the feet, but is clearly tiring, and dives for a takedown which Vrikka doesn’t bother defending. Qaurk is laboring to breathe and Vrikka bides her time, wrapping up her guard and keeping active with smaller shots while he tries to pass. He finally slips into what would be side control, if not for Vrikka seizing the opportunity to take his back. He scrambles well and winds up on the bottom in half-guard, with Vrikka working for his arm. He keeps active from the bottom with shots, but Vrikka passes into side control and begins laying knees into Qaurk’s ribs. He escapes back to his feet and Vrikka, now nearly as tired, chases him across the cage with slow but powerful shots, mostly missing, until the round ends. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Vrikka, making the combined score 29-28 for Vrikka. Vrikka wins over Qaurk by Unanimous Decision after three rounds. Qaurk: Career -1, Experience +2. Vrikka: Experience +3. Iluya (Order of the Eternal Flame) vs Sassang Mem (Stakehouse) Sassang comes out swinging, but Iluya deftly counters into a takedown and wrenches on his arm from side control. He manages to shrimp out and get back to his feet, and Iluya makes the mistake of chasing him, eating several hard shots before driving into a takedown and inadvertently leaving herself open to a triangle. She defends it well and scores an excellent body blow that opens Sassang’s guard enough for her to jump to her feet, where she eats an upkick. Sassang gets back to his feet, and they feel each other out on the feet for almost the rest of the fight, neither scoring any significant strikes until Sassang moves in too close to hit her with an uppercut, which gives her the chance to get him down with a trip from the clinch. She can’t make anything happen on the ground, and the gong sounds. The judges score the round 10-9 for Sassang Mem. The second round opens quietly. They exchange a few jabs, then Iluya shoots for a takedown. Sassang is waiting with a devastating hook, and Iluya crashes to the mat. Sassang dives onto her, but the Guide beats him to it - Iluya is unconscious. Sassang Mem wins over Iluya by Knockout due to a Punch at twenty-three seconds of the second round. Iluya: Career -1, Experience +1. Sassang Mem: Career +1, Experience +5. Hagren Redfist (Da Krew) vs Jequba (PIT-TV) Hagren seizes a hard, driving takedown after the opening exchange, and Jequba grabs onto the cage to try to defend it to no avail. The Guide shouts a warning over the sound of Hagren’s ground-and-pound, and Jequba throws up her legs to grab a weak triangle that gives Hagren no pause at all. They spend almost the rest of the fight on the ground, with Hagren switching from submission to submission as Jequba just focuses on defending and keeping active with shots from the bottom. First an arm triangle, then a leg lock, which gets used to pass and work on an arm, which gets used to take the back. Jequba lucks out and slips out the back door when Hagren adjusts his legs, and she bounces back to her feet just in time for Hagren to seize her around the midsection and drop her heavily to the mat, nearly in sync with the gong. Leshanna Selevarun scores the round 10-8 for Hagren Redfist, the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Hagren Redfist. Hagren seizes the takedown again, but this time Jequba is ready for it and spins for a kneebar as Hagren tries to posture up. It’s not going anywhere, but Hagren takes awhile to get out of it, and eats an excellent upkick in the process. Hagren creates space and Jequba tries to get to her feet, but Hagren dives on top of her and seizes her neck, rolling back into full guard. Jequba doesn’t have anything to defend with, and reluctantly taps out. Hagren Redfist wins over Jequba by Submission due to a Guillotine Choke at one minute and eleven seconds of the second round. Hagren Redfist: Career +1, Experience +5. Jequba: Career -1, Experience +1. Umper Gobblefern (IKEA) vs Wobbles Timbers (Slamonomicon) Wobbles gets into the clinch very early, and scores some good elbows before Umper appears to panic and pulls guard. He very nearly sets up a triangle before Wobbles sets up his own leg-lock attempt. Umper attempts to kick free, and Wobbles lets him, aiming to take his back - which fails, but looked very good. Umper whomps Wobbles with a great hook as they both rise to their feet, and they both back away. They circle the cage for a minute, feeling each other out, and Wobbles tries to break the cycle with an aggressive jumping knee, which Umper slips and contemptuously sends his left hand right up the middle into Wobbles’s chin. Wobbles turn and tries to pull guard, but merely allows Umper to set up an excellent uppercut. Wobbles clinches up and works his way into a solid throw, landing Umper on the mat just before the gong. Torbera Lutgehr scores the round 10-9 for Wobbles Timbers, the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Umper Gobblefern. Umper keeps the fight standing to start, winning several exchanges handily before Wobbles manages to close and secure a throw. He appears to be focusing on preventing Umper from standing, rather than attacking, but he manages to work on a convincing armbar for a while. Umper escapes and they go back to circling the cage, and he manages two knockdown punches, waving Wobbles back to his feet. Wobbles finally gets his chance for a single leg, and lands in half guard, where he tries and fails to take Umper’s back, letting Umper take dominant position. He spends the rest of the fight being held by Wobbles, but landing solid shots. Wobbles throws a knee off his back just before the gong, and it lands in Umper’s wedding tackle. The Guide refuses to believe that it was an accident, and deducts a point. All three judges score the round 10-8 for Umper Gobblefern. Umper tries to keep the fight on the feet, but Wobbles scores a lucky counterpunch, and Umper falls badly. Wobbles dives into guard, and fights like a man possessed. Umper is clearly rocked, possibly from the punch, possibly from the unfortunate way his head bounced, and Wobbles postures up and drops hands onto Umper. He throws Umper’s legs aside to dive into side control, and drops elbows for everything he’s worth. The Guide yells for Umper to defend himself, but he can’t quite block Wobbles’s shots. The Guide steps in, and the crowd howls for blood. Even Orryn Silverthread is frowning, and that’s a man who can appreciate a good kick in the fork. The Master leans over to murmur something in the Herald’s ear as the decision is announced. Wobbles Timbers wins over Umper Gobblefern by Technical Knockout due to Strikes at one minute and twenty-one seconds of the third round.. Umper Gobblefern: Experience +1. Wobbles Timbers: Career +1, Experience +4. Paelas Orandus (Menagerie) vs Vanenthe Floshern (Rough and Tumbles) Both fighters come out and tap gloves, then move straight into a brutal exhange that Paelas wins, but leaves the door open for Vanenthe to win the next one. They separate, Vanenthe closing in first and trading a body blow for a body blow, but Paelas getting another good hook in on the exit - but she slips, and Vanenthe jumps on her back. She tries for a choke, but Paelas tucks and turtles, and Vanenthe latches on and starts putting in knees. Paelas gets a hold of her own and works her way to face Vanenthe and manages to work her way to a standing clinch, where it’s not clear who is getting the better of whom. Vanenthe pushes Paelas against the cage, and they grind away at each other until the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Vanenthe Floshern. Paelas comes out strong, taking the fight to the ground on her terms, and setting up ground and pound from guard. Vanenthe is firing back with punches, and one across Paelas’s jaw makes her drop down onto one knee. Vanenthe rolls with it and takes Paelas into mount, and starts hammering away with elbows. Paelas is defending intelligently, but clearly in trouble. She spins around and lets Vanenthe take her back, eating more shots, and finally gets back to half guard, where she clings to her opponent as she recovers. Vanenthe breaks the grip, and starts swinging again. Paelas is hurt, but swinging back and trying to improve her position. Vanenthe is breathing hard, and abandons her attack in favor of a kimura. Paelas makes a mistake with her free arm, and Vanenthe secures it between her legs and begins dropping elbows onto Paelas’s face. The Guide gives Paelas every chance, but she’s too tired to overcome the position, and the fight is stopped. Vanenthe Floshern wins over Paelas Orandus by Technical Knockout due to Strikes at four minutes and fifty seconds of the second round. Paelas Orandus: Career -1, Experience +1. Vanenthe Floshern: Career +1, Experience +4. Thumisa (Golden Hoard) vs Emmeline Kirk (Path of Fire and Shadow) Both fighters feel each other out for the first minute, before exchanging a series of elbows and punches that leave both fighters bleeding. Wiping the blood out of their eyes, they continue to stalk each other around the ring, neither one landing anything definitive. Thumisa begins to build momentum, scoring an elbow and a solid tail strike, and while Emmeline finds a few strikes of her own, it continues to build. Emmeline is clearly trying to line up a counter, but Thumisa isn’t giving her the opportunity, and clinches her against the cage. Thumisa steadily works in blows while Emmeline tries to escape, and Emmeline finally secures an out with seconds to go. Thumisa circles away, but Emmeline charges with a flying kick, and Thumisa takes it straight on, rolls across the mat just before the gong, but it’s not enough. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Thumisa. The two fighters come out strong, but rock each other with solid blows to the head, and both back off. Emmeline is still trying to find the counter, but Thumisa isn’t giving her anything to work with, and they circle fruitlessly against the cage for two minutes. Finally, Thumisa loads up too heavily on a wild tail swipe, and Emmeline circles out and into a hook that staggers Thumisa. She recovers well and sends some fast shots Emmeline’s way, but leaves herself open to a devastating counterpunch. Thumisa continues swinging, but Emmeline trades her blow for blow and then some, and the Guide has to break them apart at the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Emmeline Kirk. Emmeline opens with an aggressive clinch attempt, but this time it is Thumisa who counters with a smart elbow. Emmeline appears slightly dazed, but maneuvers out of range quickly, and Thumisa denies to pursue her. Emmeline circles back in with a hook and closes into the clinch, and Thumisa tosses her to the side and brings the fight to the ground for the first time. Thumisa tries working an arm, but Emmeline is actively striking off her back, and Thumisa abandons the arm and postures up. The two of them exchange blows, Emmeline throws her back and lands an upkick, but Thumisa dives right back into Emmeline’s guard. Emmeline starts to fade, and is unable to escape back to her feet, but hangs in the fight. Thumisa simply can’t put her away, and eats another upkick, and the two of them stay locked where they are until the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Thumisa, making the aggregate score 29-28 for Thumisa. Thumisa wins over Emmeline Kirk by Unanimous Decision after three rounds. Thumisa: Experience +3. Emmeline Kirk: Career -1, Experience +2. Addressing the crowd after the card, the Herald of the House promised to release a further statement on the Melorel/Haurineth draw, the controversial disqualification of Traula Netyoive, Wobbles Timbers’s shocking third-round comeback over Umper Gobblefern, and the proposed matchups for the next leg of the Alabaster Stage. The Master of the House appeared pensive, as he boarded the House’s junk for the return trip to Goresbergh proper, as befits such an eventful night. The four fighters honored for their performances tonight (Bebe, Clunk, Shautha Rudescar, and Paatrin of Vartheturgys) received on this occasion a sculpted white stone rabbit of the lop-eared variety, in what Brutality Magazine is reliably informed is called a “loaf” pose, sculpted by the Friends of Gaia druidic circle, who may be contacted at 4144 Hottentrot Lane in the Western District. OMNIVISION™ recordings of tonight’s fights are available directly from the House of Spirit, and from licensed OMNIVISION™ dealers. Unauthorized copies of these recordings may be punishable by a civil fine or referral to the Guild of Assassins. Oswalt Porridgepot for Brutality Magazine Remora fucked around with this message at 00:26 on May 8, 2019 |
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May 8, 2019 00:11
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You're drat right Clunk. Atta boy. Too bad no woman will ever love you. Go shave your back and get ready for the next round.
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May 8, 2019 00:39
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 That was quite a match--it was looking close there at the end. How do you feel about your performance tonight? Tonight'ssss piece wasss titled "The Transssitivity of Infinity", and I feel that I did a peerlesssss job of communicating my messssage. You ssseeee, in the first round, by examining the ambiguity and origination via retakessss and variationssss, I wassss increassssing the dynamic between audience and author by objectifying emotionssss and invessssstigating the duality that developsssss through different interpretationssss of art. Furthermore, when-- I'm sorry, what was that? --ssssignificationssss are inverssssed and form and content merge. Shapessss are dissssssociated from their original meaning, by which the sssssyssssstem in which they normally function is exposed. Initially unambiguousss meaningssss are shattered and dissssssseminate endlessssssly. By thissss, I prove that-- Um, Thumisa? Yessss? What was... any of that? I wasss explaining the artisssstic ssssignificance of the fight, and the ssssymbolisssm I wasss using. So... what was the symbolism of that clinch against the wall in the first round? That wassss a ssssignifier of me beating the sssssshit out of her. Uh... Uh-huh. Anywayssss, as I wassss ssssaying... Oh, uh, sorry, but we're out of time for this interview. We'll be looking forward to your next fight! My next piece sssshall impressss, thisss I promisssse.
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May 8, 2019 00:52
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 Da Biggest's belly jiggles with glle. "You gone did it Hagren! All the pie you want tonight!"  Hagren smiles somewhat sheepishly. "Thanks boss."
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May 8, 2019 02:10
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The Order Of The Emerald Flame As the first members of the stable with a match, Sandy dragged the rest of the Order out to cheer Shautha and Illuya on. They were absolutely not disappointed, and as soon as the Guide called the match they rushed the ring and to carry the rather startled young ork off to celebrate her win. OMNIVISION™ managed to catch the Fight of the Night winner and the rest of the Order for a quick interview before the festivities ensued. Shautha, can you tell our viewers at home what it's like to win Fight of the Night on your first professional fight? Sandy: The world is in a state of shock right now, yeah! They didn't know what was coming for 'em, but now they see the power in my Order, oh yeah. Shautha: Uh, yeah. I did not expect to find that this would be as enjoyable as it was, and am humbled that the judges found my efforts to be the best of the night. Do you have any message to the viewers at home? Shautha: Um. Life isn't always what you expect it to be, but if you do your best you can succeed in whatever it brings? Sandy: I dig it! If there's one guarantee in life, it's that there ain't no guarantees. I'm real proud of how hard my girl here trained for this, and it paid off in spades. <Shautha is obviously taken aback, staring at the Mistress of the Order, who just grins toothily at her.> Any comment's on Illuya's loss? <The Yuan-Ti simply stares silently at the reporter until he shudders and turns to Sandy for comment instead.> Sandy: That was a rough loss, but it ain't the end. We all get knocked down sometimes, and it ain't about how much that happens. It's about how you get back up and fight. I got faith that our favorite snake'll be looking to bite back pretty soon. Illuya: Ssssoooon. Sandy, any thoughts on upcoming fights? Sandy: Ohhh yeah. Next up is the Ruby openers, and Muruk's gonna be poundin' the pain outta some big lizard with too many Z's in his name. It's gonna be the fight to watch!
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May 8, 2019 04:38
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The Ruby Openers at the Central Theatre (Grautreme 10th, 1219) The quiet gravitas of the Central Theatre is no match for the screaming fans here tonight. Some of the nobbiest nobs in the city are here tonight, peering quietly from the opera boxes, and the floor seating has been traditionally dismantled for the evening. The acoustics here are second to none, letting you hear every muffled swear word in the cage - or at least they would, if people would remember not to talk at the theater. The  Master of the House has a few announcements before the beginning of the card. “Tonight, history continues, but as is the way of things, we must sadly improve upon it.’ “In the heat of battle, even the greatest warrior can lose his way. Victory drowns the sonorous melody of honor beneath a sweet perfume of promises. But it is sickly, and it tainted our great enterprise this past week. Who can say what is worth the sacrifice of honor?” “I can. Chadei Haurineth shall proceed in this tournament, and Traula Netyoive shall be given the opportunity to lessen her dishonor in the eyes of the House. But these mercies shall not be extended to them again.” “Now, we begin, and I bid you all to raise the doughnuts of anticipation, and firmly dunk them in the brandy of realization!”Tonight’s judges are  Kali Laughter,  Caspian, and  Agatha Butler. The Certified Independent Diviner this evening has come back with a crookedness coefficient of 3 two-headed coins out of 10.Daniel Fatrabbit (Shepherd of the House) versus Kevin Warmwater (Rough and Tumbles) Daniel scores in the opening exchange with a hard straight left, but Kevin closes to a clinch and scores a slick trip into half guard. He starts working for a choke, but Daniel is defending well, and works his way back to full guard. They exchange strikes, each looking to create an opportunity, and Daniel finds it by pushing away and getting back to his feet. Kevin starts working leg kicks, while Daniel loads up on his punches and wades in. He’s winning the fight on the feet, but Kevin shoots as Daniel overextends himself and scores another takedown, bringing Daniel down hard into side control. Kevin turns up the ground and pound, hitting with hard knees and elbows, and while Daniel is firing back, he can’t get to a position to make those strikes effective. Both fighters are very active, but Kevin closes out the round by switching to a very convincing armbar. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Kevin Warmwater. Daniel comes out hard again, and Kevin clinches back up. Daniel keeps the fight standing a little longer, working some good elbows and knees to Kevin’s legs, but Kevin hauls Daniel over his hip and takes him to side control. He starts working on Daniel’s far arm right away, and Daniel scores with a few knees, but they’re not heavy shots. Kevin nearly passes to mount, and loses the arm in the attempt, and Kevin defends the position well enough to get out and back to his feet. Daniel goes straight back to throwing heavy leather, and Kevin can’t close the distance. He settles for sparring at range, and Daniel starts making up ground, scoring an excellent kick to the stomach before the end of the round. Agatha Butler scores the round 10-9 for Daniel Fatrabbit, and the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Kevin Warmwater. Daniel sticks to the apparent game plan, and catches Kevin with a hard uppercut as he closes in. He tries to land a vicious knee to the body, but goes low. Kevin goes down and the Guide waves for a stop. After a minute’s deliberation, Kevin’s cup turns out to be cracked and in need of replacement, and after five minutes, he is still unable to continue. The Guide calls a stop to the fight and deliberates briefly ringside with the Master and Herald, before returning with their decision. Daniel Fatrabbit and Kevin Warmwater fight to a No Contest at thirty-second seconds of the third round. Daniel Fatrabbit: Experience +2. Kevin Warmwater: Experience +2. Griel (Circus of Fools) versus Aerdeth Orfandrus (Infinite Dragon Blood Typhoon Dojo) Both fighters come out slowly, feeling each other out for an extended period. Griel breaks the dance with a body blow from long range, and Aerdeth moves forward and seizes a double-leg takedown into full guard. Griel defends several attempts to pass guard, and Aerdeth postures up and starts raining down hands. Griel answers with punishing elbows, but Aerdeth is hitting a lot of body shots, and Griel starts to slow down. Aerdeth creates a bit too much distance, and Griel seizes the opportunity to escape back to his feet, but it’s a trap - Aerdeth grabs him by the midsection and suplexes him into a turtle. Aerdeth goes for a few more strikes, and then goes for a Lolthian necktie. It’s in tight, and Griel is too tired to fight it off. The Guide grabs Griel’s arm, pauses, and shoves Aerdeth away. Aerdeth Orfandrus wins over Griel by Technical Submission due to a Lolthian Necktie at three minutes and eighteen seconds of the first round. Griel: Career -1, Experience +1. Aerdeth Ofrandrus: Career +1, Experience +5. Sazadonhiel (Most Noble Order of the Squared Circle) versus Elashil (Infinite Dragon Blood Typhoon Dojo) Both fighters come out and immediately go to the ground. They’re scrambling on the ground, Sazadonhiel is being very aggressive, but Elashil is playing a very smart counter game and putting Sazadonhiel on the back foot. Elashil is working an arm lock for the better part of a minute from top half guard, but Sazadonhiel escapes and takes his back. He’s not really doing much with it, though, and Elashil flips him off in both senses. Elashil starts ground-and-pound from fullguard, but Sazadonhiel grabs a punch and throws up his legs. It’s a tight triangle armbar, and Elashil takes a long time to finally work his way free. He somehow channels his frustration into a sitting haymaker that hits Sazadonhiel in the face. It looks like Sazadonhiel put all his hopes into that triangle, and he’s slowed down significantly. Elashil passes to half guard and ground-and-pounds comfortably for the last minute of the round. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Elashil. They both agree to continue the fight on the ground. After the initial scramble, Sazadonhiel winds up on top in half guard, working an arm. Elashil wiggle-waggles his way over to the cage and flips his way back on top, trying very hard but not effectively to grab Sazadonhiel’s neck and do... something probably quite violent to it, but he can’t get it. Sazadonhiel hurriedly works his way back to guard before Elashil figures anything out, and tries to spin for a leg before remembering that tail-locks are very difficult and giving up. Elashil punches him in the face, more out of a commentary on how silly that was than a sincere desire to do harm, but decides it worked last round and hunkers down to do some work with elbows. Sazadonhiel spins again, this time to try to escape, and winds up getting a cut opened up over his right eye. Elashil’s eyes can only be described as hungry, and he cranks up the elbows, aiming right for Sazadonhiel’s cut. He’s trying to defend, but the bleeding is getting worse, and worse, and the Guide pauses the fight to look at the cut... and signals the stop. Elashil wins over Sazadonhiel by Technical Knockout due to a Cut at three minutes and fifty-one seconds of the second round. Sazadonhiel: Career -1, Experience +1. Elashil: Career +1, Experience +4. Igden Cobblebob (WWWF) versus Grugtik (Slamonomicon) Igden wins the initial exchange on the feet, and Grugtik backs away. Igden is expecting retaliation and is clearly waiting to counter, but Grugtik is waiting him out. Igden finally goes back to aggression, and hits Grugtik with a jab. Grugtik mistimes the counter and Igden catches it in his guard. Now Grugtik is looking for the counter, and Igden isn’t giving him anything to work with. Kali Laughter appears to be trying to tie a cherry stem into a knot with her tongue, head in her hands, dead-eyed, watching what can be loosely termed a fight. Igden and Grugtik meet for a solid exchange, and then back away and circle each other for a full thirty seconds. There is an audible sigh from someone in the crowd. Igden dives in for a takedown, but Grugtik sprawls and gets in a good series of hooks, before Igden releases and scrambles back to his feet, where they continue circling. A few more tepid exchanges occur before the gong mercifully rings. All three judges score the round a draw, almost as if in protest. Every cornerman in attendance has yelled at their fighter, and Igden comes out swinging. Grugtik ducks the worst of it, but his attempts to fire back miss until he and Igden hit each other at the same time, Igden with a haymaker and Grugtik with a knee to the stomach. Igden winces and creates some distance, and Grugtik presses the advantage with a big flying knee that knocks Igden to the floor. He’s awake, but Grugtik dives on top of him, catching an upkick and holding position on top of Igden. Igden is working elbows, and Grugtik is just holding on. He finally bothers to defend some of those elbows, and Igden starts trying to work to a better position. They spend some time working, but the round is already leagues better than the last one, so they get away with it. Igden scores a reversal and starts dropping fists on Grugtik, but he escapes and it’s back to the feet. Both go at each other hard, crossing the cage twice in an unceasing mutual barrage of punches, and Igden ends the round with a big knockdown punch on Grugtik’s chin. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Igden Cobblebob. Both fighters come out hard again, and Grugtik catches Igden with another good knee. Igden backs away and Grugtik chases him, clinching up and throwing more knees, pressing him against the cage. Igden slips and Grugtik follows him down, working for an arm. They’re struggling hard against the cage, and Igden is tying Grugtik’s offense up in knots. They’re not getting a lot done, but that’s because they’re both trying so hard. Igden finally escapes back to his feet and keeps Grugtik at range with leg kicks before rushing in and pasting Grugtik across the jaw, but Grugtik seizes him around the midsection and throws him into side control, working big elbows. Igden is trying to escape, but Grugtik scoots him back to the center of the cage and keeps active. He’s not dropping huge shots, but Igden keeps letting them land and can’t get away. They spend over a minute in the center of the cage, Igden wiggling, Grugtik punching, before Igden finally gets back to the feet. Igden catches him with one good hook, and the gong bangs the round to a close. All three judges shamefacedly score the round 10-9 for Grugtik, making the aggregate score 29-29. The Master is laughing himself sick as the decision is read. Igden Cobblebob and Grugtik fight to a Draw after three rounds. Igden Cobblebob: Experience +2. Grugtik: Experience +2. Giselle Dale (Path of Fire and Shadow) versus Theren Mellerelel (Rough and Tumbles) Giselle starts things off with a quick jab, snapping Theren’s head back, but Theren turns it on after that. They circle the ring, keeping active, but Theren is landing all the good shots, first a straight right that stumbles her, then a left hook that bounces her off the cage. After two minutes, Giselle has had enough and shoots in, winding up in fifty-fifty guard, with both fighters working for leg locks. Theren gives up working for the submission and tries to get top guard, but Giselle escapes and they’re back to their feet. Giselle tries for the takedown almost immediately, but Theren has her number and springs forward with a flying knee that makes an audible pop against her skull, and she stumbles back, hands in motion, but Theren still has her timing down and counters with a tremendous haymaker, and she drops like a stuffed animal. The Guide doesn’t even have to step in, Theren is raising his arms in victory. Theren Mellerelel wins over Giselle Dale by Knockout due to a Punch at three minutes and fifty-three seconds of the first round. Giselle Dale: Career -1, Experience +1. Theren Mellerelel: Knockout of the Night! Career +2, Experience +5. Harael (Demon Clergy Traveling Tavern) versus Finellen Rubyeye (Golden Hoard) Finellen swings twice, not connecting, but it doesn’t look like he intended to, because he ducks down into a double-leg and immediately drops back into a heel hook. Harael escapes, but that was tight. He scrambles on top of Finellen and has both arms around his head, but Finellen pops his head out and grabs an arm. They’re working hard on the ground, chaining submissions into each other. Harael escapes and tries for that heel hook again, but Finellen thrashes his way to north-south and clings on trying to find a choke. Harael pushes him off and they’re back to their feet just long enough for Finellen’s left hand to find Harael’s chin and shoot in to get back to the ground. Harael is working an active guard, but Finellen is delivering tons of body shots and Harael is slowing down. The Guide is eying the clock, and Harael’s entire body jerks as a punch finds something important. Finellen postures up and starts hammering Harael with hordes of heavy hands, and they’re hitting hard. Harael is covering up but he’s not blocking enough. The Guide yells a warning, and Harael’s head bounces off the canvas once, twice, and the Guide steps in. Finellen Rubyeye wins over Harael by Technical Knockout due to Strikes at four minutes and forty-six seconds of the first round. Harael: Career -1, Experience +1. Finellen Rubyeye: Career +1, Experience +4. Nissa Burgur (Circus of Fools) versus Vees (Stakehouse) Nissa hits at the tail end of a combination to start the fight off, and Vees is bleeding from the forehead. She clinches up and forces Nissa against the cage, and hits her with a knee to the body, but Nissa pastes her right in the cut with an elbow and she falls backward. Nissa follows, throwing vicious right hands, and the blood splatters over the canvas. The Guide pauses the fight to check the cut, and when he turns Vees’s head to get a better look, the blood pools over his wrist like paint. He waves the fight to a stop, and Vees doesn’t even look mad about it. Nissa Burgur wins over Vees by Technical Knockout due to a Cut at forty-five seconds of the first round. Nissa Burgur: Career +1, Experience +4. Vees: Career -1, Experience +1. Drusilia Ethanasath (Slam Sector) versus Plume of Smoke over the Bleak Fjord (WWWF) Drusilia slips a jab from Smoke and clinches up, then switches to a flying armbar. Smoke drops to his knees and spins out of it, and spends a bit trying to find a way through Drusilia’s guard before he her back to her feet. Drusilia lets go with a wild haymaker and Smoke sends a huge hook into Drusilia’s side, and Drusilia crashes to the canvas, holding her ribs. The Guide steps in, and confirms that Drusilia cannot continue. Smoke flexes for the crowd over her dry heaving. Plume of Smoke over the Bleak Fjord wins over Drusilia Ethanasath by Knockout due to a Liver Punch at one minute and twelve seconds of the first round. Drusilia Ethanasath: Career -1, Experience +1. Plume of Smoke over the Bleak Fjord: Career +1, Experience +5. Zsuolia (Stoned People's Army) versus Barend Fireforge (Stakehouse) Zsuolia weaves her way into the clinch, and tries valiantly to secure a takedown, but Barend is agily keeping on his feet, bopping Zsuolia on the temples with light hooks. She pulls back to defend herself, but Barend is having excellent luck getting through her guard. He puts an uppercut on her chin, and a great hook onto her left side. Zsuolia finally finds a path to a takedown, tossing Barend to the side, and he immediately gets back to guard and starts working for an omoplata. She finally gets him to let go with an authoritative slam, but he responds with hard elbows to the top of her head. She tries to posture up, but Barend has been waiting for it and sweeps her into side control, lining up hard knees to the body. She can’t make anything happen, but she stays in the game, taking knees until the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Barend Fireforge. Zsuolia tries again for the clinch, and Barend settles for body shots while she looks for an opportunity. He tries to mix things up with a knee, but she was waiting for it and down to the ground they go. He continues working body shots from the bottom until she drops back for a leglock. It’s tight, and looks painful, but after almost a minute of working against it, Barend escapes back to the feet. Zsuolia eats a solid front kick while they circle the cage, and Barend is the one who moves into the clinch this time. Zsusolia gets the Druish Plum around his head, but she doesn’t have knees to take full advantage. She lights him up with elbows, but Barend is still working those body shots, and manages to find an uppercut in the bargain. She finally secures a takedown into side control, and Barend gives up a decent-looking kimura almost immediately, but he manages to keep it together until the end of the round. Caspian scores the round 10-9 for Zsuolia, and the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Barend Fireforge. Both fighters are starting the round cautiously, trading jabs and finding the range. Barend pumps a double-jab that finds its target, but Zsuolia shoots under it and secures the takedown. She finds his back and starts working a choke, but Barend is defending well and escapes into full guard, where Zsuolia finds the heel hook again. Barend escapes again and dives on top of Zsuolia, starting to work ground and pound, but Zsusolia works her tail around him. Zsuolia is working on an armlock from the bottom, but Barend is landing knees, and neither one has an advantage. Zsuolia finally has to let go of the arm, and Barend locks down in side control, working knees and hammerfists. With thirty seconds left, Zsuolia gets her tail under and her arm around his neck, and seizes a hard guillotine choke. It’s tight, but Barend manages to wait out the gong. Kali Laughter scores the round 10-9 for Barend Fireforge, and the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Zsuolia. Across all three rounds, Kali Laughter scores the fight 30-27 for Barend Fireforge, Caspian scores the fight 29-28 for Zsuolia, and Agatha Butler scores the fight 29-28 for Barend Fireforge. The Herald side-eyes the judges’ station, but shrugs. Barend Fireforge wins over Zsuolia by Split Decision after three rounds. Barend Fireforge: Fight of the Night! Career +1, Experience +3. Zsuolia: Fight of the Night! Experience +2. Wubbex (Stoned People's Army) versus Osborn Smoothhands (Hero Souls) Both fighters come out active, tagging each other several times in the opening exchanges, but Osborn probably comes out ahead. Wubbex clinches up with double underhooks and tries to lever Osborn off the mat for the throw, but Osborn is defending well, despite hard stomps from Wubbex. Both fighters wrestle uneventfully for a little while, and try to knee each other in the body at the same time, resulting in some reasonably comical footwork as they both try to work the position. Osborn scores with another knee, but loses it and Wubbex slams him to the mat, working a neck crank to try to pass guard. Osborn secures a reasonable triangle, but Wubbex just starts putting elbows into his face in response. Osborn manages to escape to the feet, and keeps Wubbex at range with good straights. As the ten-second warning clatters, Wubbex rushes Osborn, and receives a kick that puts him straight onto his bottom. Osborn waves him to his feet just in time for the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Osborn Smoothhands. Both fighters come out cautiously, working light jabs, but Wubbex moves in with a counter hook that lands right on the button, and Osborn pirouettes to the canvas. He looks like he’s getting back up for a split-second, but he slackens out, and the Guide body-checks Wubbex, who is rushing to finish the job that’s already done. Wubbex wins over Osborn Smoothhands by Knockout due to a Punch at fourteen seconds of the second round. Wubbex: Career +1, Experience +5. Osborn Smoothhands: Career -1, Experience +1. Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains (Toolbox) versus Game of Chance by the Far Dune (Shepherd of the House) Owl wins the first tentative exchange, and starts turning up the pressure. He scores with a big right hand, and Game clinches up. They work against the cage for a minute, and Game jumps up and tries for a flying armbar, but Owl shakes him off almost immediately. Game tries to push Owl off-balance with some aggressive exchanges, but nothing is really landing. Owl shoots in and secures a takedown into full guard, but Game escapes back to his feet quickly and tags Owl with a head kick as he’s getting up. Owl staggers, and Game jumps onto his back, but is quickly shaken off. They circle each other around the cage until the gong. Caspian scores the round 10-9 for Game of Chance by the Far Dune, and the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains. Both fighters come out more urgently in the second round, with some rapid footwork and exchanges. Owl scores with a big body kick, and Game lands a good uppercut. Owl is trying to land the counter, but Game isn’t giving him much to work with, and Owl tries for an inside leg kick that goes high. The Guide issues a verbal warning and both fighters tap gloves before continuing. Owl lands a big outside leg kick, and Game counters with a smooth takedown into half guard, and starts working on an arm. Owl works back to full guard and pushes free, and Game scores an excellent body kick as he’s recovering. They exchange actively on the feet, Game finding success with an overhand left, and Owl finding some good uppercuts. Both fighters are slowing down, and Game clinches against the cage until the gong. All three judges score the round 10-9 for Game of Chance by the Far Dune. Both fighters come out blazing right from the start. Owl spins as he sees Game coming in hot and scores with a big back fist, but Game gets the takedown he was after. He drops back and starts working on a kneebar, but Owl scrambles over the top and secures side control, starting with powerful knees and hammer fists. Owl tries to set up an armbar, but Game escapes and they’re back to their feet, and they start exchanging aggressively. There’s no defense at all, they’re just throwing wild, heavy leather. They wind up in a half-and-half clinch and start teeing off on each other, Owl with uppercuts and Game with hooks, until Game hits Owl in the stomach with a hard knee and opens the distance. Owl starts working leg kick combinations from distance, and Game responds with magic missile-accurate jabs. Owl shoots into the clinch off of a hard leg kick and drives into Game with a knee, and Game puts his whole torso into an elbow right on Owl’s jaw. He staggers away, and Game chases him with jabs as the ten-second warning sounds. Owl takes a running start and jumps into a flying head kick that drops Game to the canvas, and the gong sounds as Game is trying to scramble to his feet. It’s a razor thin round, and definitely the most active of the night so far. The Master of the House is standing and applauding as the fighters return to their corners. Caspian scores the round 10-9 for Game of Chance by the Far Dune, and the other two judges score the round 10-9 for Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains. The overall scores are 30-27 for Game of Chance by the Far Dune from Caspian, and 29-28 for Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains from the other two judges. The Master is whispering urgently to the Herald as the next fight is set up. Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains wins over Game of Chance by the Far Dune by Split Decision after three rounds. Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains: Round of the Night! Career +1, Experience +3. Game of Chance by the Far Dune: Round of the Night! Experience +2. Muruk Blackarrow (Order of the Emerald Flame) versus Doudra of Zzyzznaaxyroth (Slam Sector) Muruk starts things off with a crossbow bolt of a straight right, staggering Doudra right out of the gate. He chases her down with jabs, and she’s not defending well at all. Muruk shoots in for the takedown and gets to side control, and starts working for an arm triangle. She defends it, but poorly, and as he repositions himself for ground and pound, she spins out into north-south and locks in the north-south choke. She curls into it, and Muruk is trying to defend, but it’s in so tight. Muruk’s fist hits her once, twice... and opens up, to urgently tap out. Doudra of Zzyzznaaxyroth wins over Muruk Blackarrow by Submission due to a North-South Choke at one minute and twenty-one seconds of the first round. Muruk Blackarrow: Career -1, Experience +1. Doudra of Zzyzznaaxyroth: Submission of the Night! Career +2, Experience +5. The Herald of the House announced forthcoming statements on the outcomes of Fatrabbit/Warmwater and Cobblebob/Grugtik, pending OMNIVISION™ review and internal consultation. He also announced an additional, discretionary “Round of the Night” award to be given to Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains and Game of Chance by the Far Dune to recognize an extraordinary close to their contest. The fighters recognized for their exceptional performances tonight (Barend Fireforge, Doudra of Zzyzznaaxyroth, Game of Chance by the Far Dune, Owl in the Morning in the Whispering Mountains, Theren Mellerelel, and Zsuolia) shall receive porcelain masks from the Actors Guild, painted by the renowned abstract artist Cake of Chocolate on the Faraway Shore, who may be contacted through the Illuminated Agents at 1 Contrivance Circle in the Knackers for speaking engagements, teaching packages, and financial domination opportunities. No haggling, serious inquiries only, please. OMNIVISION™ recordings of tonight’s fights are available directly from the House of Spirit, and from licensed OMNIVISION™ dealers. Unauthorized copies of these recordings may be punishable by a civil fine or referral to the Guild of Assassins. If you have recently become unable to distinguish between multiple realities that appear to all be happening to you simultaneously, please contact your nearest OMNIVISION™ dealer to sign a retroactive waiver of liability. Oswalt Porridgepot for Brutality Magazine Remora fucked around with this message at 20:18 on May 19, 2019 |
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May 19, 2019 19:21
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Grugtik didn't like meetings, given the choice between fighting an owlbear with his fists or sitting in on a long meeting he would choose the Owlbear every single time. And as someone who in the words of his old elder of the Druid Circle 'leaned a little too closely to the violent side of nature' meetings about this little incident or that small thing that got turned into a big thing seemed to happen a lot. Sitting across from the looming presence of Nedrazeer the Lich as he quietly wrote into his book of strangely non-animal looking leather, that he was called to attend almost immediately after the fight with Igden, and then was taken there in the night when he was asleep by his bed - very literally - was making him wish for several Owlbears at this point. "Can I-" He began, and then the Lich raised a warning finger, as he dotted the last sentence he was writing. His cold eyes moved from the page to the increasingly nervous Goblin as the tome was pushed to one side. [GRUGTIK, MAY I REMIND YOU THE DETAILS OF OUR CONTRACT?] The jaw never moved, the sound just seemed to come out of the air itself but it was obvious who was speaking. "I perform for the best of me abilities, and work hard for the company, ser." [IT DID NOT LOOK LIKE THAT IN THE RING GRUGTIK] "I mean, I pulled it back in the 3rd round sir so I haven't lost-" [BUT YOU DIDN'T WIN EITHER, DID YOU GRUGTIK?] "Not, exactly, but I could win? Right?" [COULD HAVES AND WOULDS HAVES ARE NOT THE CERTAINTY THIS COMPANY WAS BUILT UPON GRUGTIK] The Mister steeped his fingers as he looked at the Goblin. [AN UNCERTAIN RESULT CANNOT BE PLANNED AROUND, I DISLIKE IT WHEN I CAN'T PLAN FOR THE FUTURE, IT MAKES IT HARDER TO DO THE PAPERWORK. I DO NOT LIKE THINGS BEING MADE HARDER FOR ME THEN THEY HAVE TO BE. ARE WE IN ACCORD?] Grugtik just nodded, it was the only he felt he might actually get out of this room. [GOOD, AND YOU HAVE A FULL MONTH TO REFLECT UPON THESE MISTAKES AND PERHAPS REDEEM YOURSELF, WE HAVE SCOUTED A PROMISING RECRUIT WE WISH FOR YOU TO MAKE INTRODUCTIONS] A small imp like creature having finished with the letter written only moments ago, handed a sealed ebony black envelope to Grugtik. It was affixed with the pure white wax seal of the company and was addressed to... "Eh? Isn't this one already in a stable?" [NOT FOR LONG, CIRCUMSTANCES MAY HAVE CAUSED SOME STABLES TO DROP OUT OF THE COMPETITION EARLIER THAN EXPECTED. THIS IS UNFORTUNATE, BUT THIS ONE HAS A PLACE IN OUR COMPANY. I WOULD SEE YOU GET THE OFFER TO HER FIRST AND FOREMOST] 'Wait how do you know some stables are about to go under?' was what Grugtik would have said but... He decided he liked being a temporary errand boy and keeping his mouth shut, better than voicing his suspicions in front of his boss. The moment Nedrazeer excused him from the meeting he was out there like a shot, he didn't even see the bed returning to his room after the fact. TheNabster fucked around with this message at 21:35 on May 26, 2019 |
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May 26, 2019 13:17
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 Congratulations on the win, Finellen, that was an impressive bout! Thank you! I'm glad to have won, but I have to admit, I'm disappointed. Disappointed? By a first round victory? I know, it sounds a bit ridiculous when you put it like that. But... I guess I wasn't able to demonstrate what I was hoping to. This isn't an art thing, is it? Because Thumisa... Gods, no! No, no no.The opposite, really. I'm here for the science of it. I'm a Rubyeye, after all. It's what we do. ...Science? Kinesiology, specifically. The study of body movements. I won't bore you with the details, but I think it has a lot of promise for medicine, and rehab... and, yes, for fighting. I won by strikes, as you saw, but it's grappling that I really consider valuable for learning about the limits of the body. I was able to get the fight to the ground, but Harael was slippery--I just couldn't get a hold to stick. So it's a win, but I've still got a long ways to go to reach my goals. Huh. That's... actually interesting. So you'll be focusing on improving your ground game, then? Well, that depends on what Skurrg has in store for me. Being part of the Hoard is... well, it's educational, let's put it like that. I'm sure that more grappling will be part of it, but if I let myself get one-dimensional, that's not exactly going to make research easy. But hopefully I'll have some new tricks for the next round. It was good talking to you, Finellen! Good luck! Thanks! And to all my family out there... I think this is going to work out. Thanks for your support all these years.
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May 27, 2019 03:21
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Anamaxia Chaine, reporter for the CoF fanzine, 'Big Top Full of Idiots': Griel, Nissa, thank you for joining us. Mixed results for the Circus of Fools today. Griel: "In some ways, this is the ideal situation for us. Do too well and foolishness is perceived as wisdom. Do too poorly and foolishness is all too easily dismissed to fester. We are all bound by fate, and by fate were the evenness of the outcomes decided. That, an underdark clincher and a whole lot of blood loss, at any rate." Nissa: "It was fun making the goblin sailor bleed, but it was all over so quickly. Foolish to end a bout so soon, but then again it's foolish to have a bout at all. Anyway, the big takeaway is, this is so much better than being a freelance carnivaler. Never forget that, all the wannabe fools out there." AC: Master Two Suns is always going on about foolishness, and it seems you've both picked up the habit. Is it a philosophy? A way of perceiving the world? Just a bunch of random idiocy with no real rhyme or reason? G: "All of these, and none. He, she or they who seek to be foolish, or to make a fool of themselves, will succeed. Those who seek not to be foolish, and to not make a fool of themselves, will sometimes fail. Is it better to be on a path that you know you will reach the destination on, or to risk a road that may end you up precisely where you do not wish to be?" N: "Let's face it, it's all a load of meaningless gibberish, but it's meaningless gibberish that sounds cool." AC: Quite. So, where do you go from here? Planning to build up towards the Ruby Cloak, or to learn how to escape the Lolthian Necktie? G: "Trying to predict the future, or second-guess the vicissitudes of Fate, is a fool's errand in the truest sense of the word. Why make plans when they go out the window the moment there's opposition? Better instead to be open and ready, to play the hand we are dealt." N: "Course I'm going for the big one. I'd be a fool not to. I'd be a fool anyway, but that's beside the point." AC: Griel, Nissa, thank you for your time. G: "You're welcome." N: "Sure. Not like I've got anything better to do."
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May 27, 2019 14:59
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All right, so, probably every two weeks looks like the schedule I’m going to be able to keep. I’ll go faster if I can, of course. To keep interest and the thread going in the meantime, I’m instituting Fame. Every time you make an effortpost in this thread, you get a point of Fame. The manager at the end of each in-game month (4 cards, more or less) gets something - not sure what yet, but it’ll affect fights in your favor for the next month. At the end of each in-game month, Fame turns into Influence, which you will be able to trade for stuff. I want to get a month’s worth of post data in before I establish exchange rates, but I’m betting it’ll be 1:1 to exchange Influence for Experience for any fighter, and 1 point of Influence to improve your position in a draft by one place. Any suggestions for other cool stuff to do with Fame or Influence are welcomed. Fame will be retroactive, I'll put a tracker of current Fame and Influence levels at the end of every card from here on out. Remora fucked around with this message at 21:50 on May 28, 2019 |
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May 28, 2019 17:22
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