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Car wreck just like my sister
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Apr 29, 2019 02:55
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I die of a broken heart after reading the depressing posts ITT.
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Apr 29, 2019 03:05
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It's the second coming and my aging body's refractory period is too much to bear.
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Apr 29, 2019 03:07
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with a goddamn goldfinch lodged in my windpipe just like that loving gypsy lady said 
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Apr 29, 2019 03:15
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low speed car accident third degree paper cut staring intently down the barrel of elmer fudd's gun
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Apr 29, 2019 03:17
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Fatal butt accident. Not like Elvis!
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Apr 29, 2019 03:21
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Mauled to death by some sort of big cat.
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Apr 29, 2019 03:26
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Prolapsed penis
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Apr 29, 2019 04:51
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Aspirating on my own vomit. gently caress you I don't have a drinking problem.
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Apr 29, 2019 04:52
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Slipped on ice on remote driveway, hit head, passed out, die to cold temps. This is not a "could", this is a "will".
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Apr 29, 2019 04:52
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Eaten alive by a pack of rabid weasels
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Apr 29, 2019 04:56
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drunkenly falling face first into that damned sarlacc pit ur mom calls a vagine
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Apr 29, 2019 08:04
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forgetting to turn on a fume hood
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Apr 29, 2019 08:08
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Resting Lich Face posted:Aspirating on my own vomit. You have a drinking problem
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Apr 29, 2019 08:27
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One of my first MSPaints:
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Apr 29, 2019 08:29
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On top of some hooker in 20-30 years
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Apr 29, 2019 08:30
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knowing my luck it will be in a car crash. I will be on the way to pick up my winning jackpot lottery cheque
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Apr 29, 2019 09:11
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Sleeping wrong Falling down some stairs Eating expired food Rounding error Getting stuck in a tar pit
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Apr 29, 2019 09:45
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Asphyxiate due to lungs coated with cornnut dust.
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Apr 29, 2019 10:33
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alone
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Apr 29, 2019 10:34
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I’ll probably die of a spleen rupture while a gangbang Sasquatch sucks off 100 guys as the only media on the internet and comes to my house and demands I father her child because I clicked on her porn once. Or just have more than two drinks with her and die faster from liver failure.  Jokes on her tho, my spleen was already hosed up and overactive, she just made it so I can’t digest grains and hearty vegetables. ClamdestineBoyster fucked around with this message at 11:29 on Apr 29, 2019 |
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Apr 29, 2019 11:19
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OMFG FURRY posted:forgetting to turn on a fume hood There are so many ways to die in lab I can't pick one.
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Apr 29, 2019 11:54
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I’m gonna die of a hectic push to the east because some rear end in a top hat thinks they are my personal savior and intervenes every time I try to neutralize the problem either because they think my tool is a personal threat to them or because they are under some delusion that their tool can offer protection against this. I will probably never know which one it is or ever care.
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Apr 29, 2019 12:26
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bad poster syndrome
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Apr 29, 2019 12:35
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Apr 29, 2019 13:38
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Influenza
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Apr 29, 2019 13:50
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shot by john oates' bodyguards after my cheap daryl hall wig falls off, revealing the charade i've been keeping up since 1972
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Apr 29, 2019 13:51
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also lung cancer
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Apr 29, 2019 13:59
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It will involve a shitload of alcohol, I can promise you that. I've been smoking heavily for almost thirty years as well but I believe the booze will get me before my lungs give out.
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Apr 29, 2019 14:09
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I already have cancer, but it won’t be that thanks to the hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of immuno drugs coursing through my veins, probably. I’m gonna go with drug overdose, but not the cool kind where you just nod off on too much Demerol. More like bloated and constipated on the john like Elvis.
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Apr 29, 2019 14:23
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I am in the privileged position of knowing exactly how I will die. A year or so ago I ordered a lovely grappling hook from China, and I'm dead certain it will be my doom, one way or another. You see, I am not a ninja, but a fat old man posting online, and occasionally trying to climb poo poo with said hook and a cheap rope.
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Apr 29, 2019 14:24
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Accidentally electrocute myself decorating for Halloween, my lifeless body remains in the front yard for 2-3 weeks as everybody says "Dang that guy really went overboard with the decorations again."
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Apr 29, 2019 14:32
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The first four replies to the OP bundled up into one response.
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Apr 29, 2019 15:20
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Heart attack while half way through effort posting on a dead, gay website. Corpse discovered weeks later and used by insurance company employees to run a scam 'Weekend at Bernies' style before being thrown in a sewer/ditch.
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Apr 29, 2019 15:31
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Boomerang
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Apr 29, 2019 15:48
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Getting swatted by an angry racist twitch streamer because I keep typing "BALLS!" in varying colors and font sizes into their live chat.
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Apr 29, 2019 17:20
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Doing drugs while sitting on the train tracks and passing out . Dying of respiratory arrest before the train hits me.
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Apr 29, 2019 17:25
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Wallrod posted:alone and with many regrets
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Apr 29, 2019 17:31
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Knowing I didn't try since 2006, that I should not have chickened out, it was all a total waste and needless suffering
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Apr 29, 2019 17:35
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 05:37 |
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Wallrod posted:alone and with many regrets 
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Apr 29, 2019 17:35
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