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Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."

Lynneth posted:

Magnificent.
Soon, it will be time to worldbuild more. :allears:

I will have votes on potential outcomes for the rest of the world.

I will also need flags.

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Xelkelvos
Dec 19, 2012

Kangxi posted:

I will have votes on potential outcomes for the rest of the world.

I will also need flags.

What kind of flags?

megane
Jun 20, 2008



Kangxi posted:

I will also need flags.

The words have been spoken. The ancient horror Flagchat stirs within its dark prison.

Freudian
Mar 23, 2011

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1yYHVTdViA

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."

megane posted:

The words have been spoken. The ancient horror Flagchat stirs within its dark prison.

The Demon Empress has willed it, it must be so...


Xelkelvos posted:

What kind of flags?

Without spoiling all of my plans for the EU4 conversion, I will at least need the following, off the top of my head:
-Tibet (although I may keep a variant of the old snow lion flag. Nothing with the swastika on it, please.)
-Later Jin China
-Scandinavia
-Norse England
-Norse Ireland
-Germany?
-Norse-Nahua France
-Hindu Abyssinia
-The remnants of the Tibetan kingdoms in the West
-Mongolian Byzantium, or what's left of it
-Ethopian Sunni Anatolia
-Buddhist states in Egypt
-Carantania
-The Jerusalem Raj
-Sunni Vladimir
-the Khazars (Karaites/Rabbinic/Samaritan?)

edit 128 x 128 in whatever format, I can convert them to TGA pretty easily

edit 2: germany is sunni now

Kangxi fucked around with this message at 18:41 on Dec 22, 2019

Complications
Jun 19, 2014

Is lpix down for anyone else or is it just me? I haven't been able to see the screenshots of the last update at all since it went up.

idhrendur
Aug 20, 2016

Complications posted:

Is lpix down for anyone else or is it just me? I haven't been able to see the screenshots of the last update at all since it went up.

It's fine for me.

Complications
Jun 19, 2014

idhrendur posted:

It's fine for me.

I'll see what else I can mess with then. Thanks.

EDIT: Apparently something about Firefox's use of DNS over HTTPS broke it. Switching the setting off fixed it.

Complications fucked around with this message at 20:17 on Dec 21, 2019

Luhood
Nov 13, 2012

megane posted:

The words have been spoken. The ancient horror Flagchat stirs within its dark prison.

So sayeth the ancient tome, the Vexillonomicon.

Kangxi posted:

Without spoiling all of my plans for the EU4 conversion, I will at least need the following, off the top of my head:

Has the game given us anything to work with? Or are we more or less free to produce something useful?

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."

Luhood posted:

So sayeth the ancient tome, the Vexillonomicon.

Has the game given us anything to work with? Or are we more or less free to produce something useful?

Lots of very generic flags and ones that don't really match how the world has changed. I'll have everything posted for the final state of the world update.

Kangxi fucked around with this message at 00:39 on Dec 23, 2019

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."
Chapter 56: 1376 to 1400: Tsenmo Purgyal Lasya 'the Holy', then 'the Griffin'

As told by Her Majesty the Emperor


Uppity Buddhists or not, we are still at the very top of the mountain. Nobody dares challenge Tibet, because nobody can. I had accomplished the greatest feat of military conquest by anyone, in centuries, faster than the Mongols. Now it'll be up to whoever comes after to hold it all together.

Good luck, you poor bastards.


By the way, I'm taxing all these gaudy court rituals and firing about a third of the staff. You'll need to get rid of your rear end-wipers.


I know you all will try and squeeze people so I'll need to put a stop to that for a while. All this plunder out of China was a singular event and there won't be anything this big ever again, so you have to live like it.


The empire wants for nothing, but it's not infinite. I will at least keep your hands out of my pockets. Enrich yourselves, I understand, but not at my expense.


For now and all eternity we will still have to find something to do. I still have my plans.


What are we going to go, go west? Hahaha! What could anybody do there? Anything west of Jerusalem is just cannibalism, plagues, and mosquitos.


Besides, I have enough ungrateful people to deal with.


I have to keep my plans secret and to focus my mind constantly. I cannot reveal anything.

Gyalyum the Benevolent, I heard, could simply stroll into a monastery and in a manner of days could have made all the nuns forget their vows and throw themselves at her, but that's not me. I cannot make them love me but I can make them fear the sight of me.


I mean other people can justify it to themselves. But the act itself is reason enough.


Let the bastards try. They would not dare.


I live and die by the threat of fear. Let he who inconveniences me for a day suffer for the rest of his life.


But I must observe the rest of the world, too. Not to show off at noble gatherings but because I have to. This man, Timur, he is worth keeping an eye on.


I mean -- my god, nobody else has big ideas for things anymore. Picking flies?


I will compose my own story. This will be the truth.



Any inconveniences aside.


What else did Gyalyum do - oh yes, get a better sword. I need one of those. What happened to the original one, anyway? The Archpriestess Tse, the second one, I mean, had it, so the Sacred Hierarchs have it now?


I ask about Timur and he's already taken all of Arabia. This guy is somebody to watch out for.


I keep shuffling people around, but Esclarmonde -- she's staying around. I'll put her in charge of my medicines from now on. You can't be too careful with people like this. You need people you've known for years, else...


Anyway. China is ours. Who else is worth invading? The Mongols of course. They will pay tribute, or I will take it from them.


This Timur, he sides with the Mongolians. Now things will be interesting. I send him a letter about what I really think. What does he think about ruling -- history -- where to find good people -- could we have a chat sometime? This is someone I could really work with.


He sent a gracious letter back.

I do hope we could meet someday. This is not exactly a time of demigods but he might come close.


My council all think so. They'll agree with me anyway.


We find ruins on the way out, discovered by a camp follower. They look too old to have been from the empire -- could they have been from before? Could the Zhangzhung have made them? And where are they now?


We march the army as far west as we can go -- the Mongolians are moving south from the Kazakh Steppe - and we catch and smother them in a river village near the major pass. Too slow, too slow. I can't be too slow.


My general, the one who came from China, asks me for part of the Western Protectorate. Maybe, if he keeps his mouth shut and does his job.


We find the Mongolians and their allies near these little mountain villages and entomb them. This is why other people will remember this place.


I've never even heard of half these places myself before the campaign. Tibet is truly vast...


And the world itself is even greater. How much of it is really worth fighting over?

I should have expected this.


When I'm out in the remotest regions the vassal kings find some distant relative that isn't in China or that hasn't died and they demand she sit on the throne instead of me.

I'm going to find this vassal queen and make her eat her father's corpse.


The Mongols have found themselves at peace. They will offer many things to their gods for this.


And Timur... Timur has died, and his great empire is split among his children. A shame, a shame. The world is less interesting without him in it.


And it's all the vassal kings in the west, in the mountains, and in the desert. Bad timing considering I just moved the whole loving army to the west because of the Mongols.


Let them flee in terror.


Even in a time of treason, there are those who will fight for me.


I march my army back southeast and catch part of them in the mountain spur.. The armies of Alexander once mined gold here. Now he is gone.


My other generals have marched an army south to the Ganges, and I will march east to catch up with them and sweep aside anything in my path.


We find and overwhelm them near a city the Bengalis once built. The Bengalis...


Then north to the Rock of Gahanj..


Then - I get the news - witches plan their treason. Witches! Never trust a goddamned witch...


I march the army back watch to Rajputana, in a long path. The traitor's capital falls. I burn every loving tree around Ranthambore.


And again, that rat-faced general demands I give him his own land for assistance.

What philosopher said it? "The act of committing treason is an art, to be handled delicately and with skill; but the traitor themselves are filth."


Well, I've built him a palace. Slightly smaller than he is tall. He stopped screaming after a week.


My cousins in China sent a letter in protest, but you know, gently caress them too.


We find the remnants of their army again at some village.. I don't remember. It's going in the book.


Then -- then. The traitors ask for peace, clemency, so they can go home. They say there will be more dead if this doesn't stop.

I don't want it to stop.


I'll march the army northwest again and end this beyond any hope of their recovery.


One...


And two.

Then I get the news from the Sacred Hierarch-


He wants a war for Perm. Across the furthest mountain range we know, next to the Mongolians. Yeah, that's going to work out.


I don't have time to deal with these things anymore. Life is too drat short.


I march the army west and lead the last charge.


Then that's it. She surrenders. And then nobody will hear from them ever again.


I hear that the witch, having marched west with her army, has declared an unending vendetta upon us.

And then -- nothing. She vanished.

I'll give it a decade or two before she tries to crawl back. Else all that is left of her are stories to scare disobedient children. I mean the second Tse got herself stabbed to death, and then nothing happened... predicting who is and isn't divine and what the gods want is a tough business. I'm willing to pay a great deal for anyone who can...


I feel sick of it all.


loving hell - now the Sunnis are going against the son of Timur in Arabia.


The war in Perm falters. Well of course not. Nobody else wants to go to the rear end-end of nowhere. The Mongols could have done it, they'd like more grazing land, but they all were kicked out of the church, remember?


I have to do everything myself, and every day I waste means the empire dies a year earlier.


After all this time, though, I feel at ease. About the strain of it. I just - don't - think about it.


Other people may want their peace. I've done well enough everywhere else.


But at last. I have my book. I have the story of the greatest dynasty the world has ever known, and I shall have it copied and the morals of text inscribed on stone pillars in every language of the empire, from the Tarim Basin to Lanka, from Makran to the Yellow Sea.


Every day, I hear the emperors of old whispering to me. I cling to the visions of them and their sacred words because that's all I ever learned from. All there was to guide me...

Kangxi fucked around with this message at 22:32 on Dec 22, 2019

Deadmeat5150
Nov 21, 2005

OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN
So the Empress who read the Necronomicon has penned her own book? Excellent.

winterwerefox
Apr 23, 2010

The next movie better not make me shave anything :(

At least the General got that little place he was asking for :allears:

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."

winterwerefox posted:

At least the General got that little place he was asking for :allears:

A story like his needs closure

verbal enema
May 23, 2009

onlymarfans.com
sturdy solid tibetan stonework closure

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
Long live Lasya,
she loves you.
Do what she says,
or you know what she'll do!

i81icu812
Dec 5, 2006

Deadmeat5150 posted:

So the Empress who read the Necronomicon has penned her own book? Excellent.

Lunatic werewolf satan-spawn necronomicon-reading empress

Snipee
Mar 27, 2010

i81icu812 posted:

Lunatic werewolf satan-spawn necronomicon-reading empress

An empress who also conquered China in record time. I’m curious what history books will say of her.

And Kangxi, this has been an incredible ride. I kept hoping for us to see Tibet fall as much as she has risen, but you managed to keep it interesting despite having blobbed over a third of Asia. Well done!

i81icu812
Dec 5, 2006

Snipee posted:

An empress who also conquered China in record time. I’m curious what history books will say of her.

And Kangxi, this has been an incredible ride. I kept hoping for us to see Tibet fall as much as she has risen, but you managed to keep it interesting despite having blobbed over a third of Asia. Well done!

I mean she literally wrote the history book herself

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

Honestly you could probably just cut CK2 to off the second Laysa dies. It'd be a good story cut off and it would leave a buffer to excuse interim cleanup.

Wes Warhammer
Oct 19, 2012

:sueme:

Rody One Half posted:

Honestly you could probably just cut CK2 to off the second Laysa dies. It'd be a good story cut off and it would leave a buffer to excuse interim cleanup.
:agreed:

Plus, we're close enough to the end of CK2 that whatever the ruler(s) after Lasya bring will probably end up being overshadowed by all the absurd poo poo she's done during her reign.

verbal enema
May 23, 2009

onlymarfans.com
Isnt if someone is alive at the end they carry over to eu4?

super-redguy
Jan 24, 2019

verbal enema posted:

Isnt if someone is alive at the end they carry over to eu4?

They do.

Let's see how many of the next 44 years she can survive.

i81icu812
Dec 5, 2006

Wes Warhammer posted:

:agreed:

Plus, we're close enough to the end of CK2 that whatever the ruler(s) after Lasya bring will probably end up being overshadowed by all the absurd poo poo she's done during her reign.

On the other hand the empire is liable to come apart violently upon her death since she’s killed all potential successors and has shown no interest in children

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

She hasn't killed all potential successors. The dynasty should still number in the hundreds, it'll just go to another branch.

i81icu812
Dec 5, 2006

Rody One Half posted:

She hasn't killed all potential successors. The dynasty should still number in the hundreds, it'll just go to another branch.

Right, that’s the problem. There’s no obvious close family member with a strong claim and power base—they’re all dead.



Instead there’s hundreds of distant relatives all ready to claim the throne or independence.

i81icu812 fucked around with this message at 15:12 on Dec 23, 2019

GunnerJ
Aug 1, 2005

Do you think this is funny?
Last minute immortality play lets gooooo

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."

Rody One Half posted:

Honestly you could probably just cut CK2 to off the second Laysa dies. It'd be a good story cut off and it would leave a buffer to excuse interim cleanup.

I am in fact going to do this; I'll have a very special interlude post ready for 1400 and make the last state of the world post if or when Lasya bites it before 1453.

vanity slug
Jul 20, 2010

Can't wait for Lasya to become an immortal lunatic werewolf satan-spawn necronomicon-reading empress

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

If she did get immortality we'd be in a pretty good situation in EU4 because she'd be a monarch point generating machine

Snipee
Mar 27, 2010

GunnerJ posted:

Last minute immortality play lets gooooo

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."
INTERLUDE - 1400

Philip K. Dick, VALIS posted:

To fight the Empire is to be infected by its derangement. This is a paradox; whoever defeats a segment of the Empire becomes the Empire; it proliferates like a virus, imposing its form on its enemies. Thereby it becomes its enemies.

Light snow settles on the dark cobblestones, and the cold brightness of the day ebbs into a forbidding night; on the distant countryside, skin reddens and numbs in the space of minutes.

For all the great cities of the world, all the glittering imperial capitals with statues, grand squares, and monuments, there is only the one Lhasa, to make another is impossible. So bedecked with temples and the accumulation of houses and stalls in this valley's harsh geometry, with the bulk of Potala looming above the rest, its size and angles suggesting hostility and indifference. Nowhere else would have the seat of an empire in a place this remote, this isolated. Simply to arrive here is a holy act, and those who perish along the way are noble martyrs.


The empress herself wore the crimson robes of a monk, and the people said she could change her head to that of a great mastiff.


Lasya surveyed her empire with detachment, for detachment itself means power. The scar was a new addition -- dueling accident -- but her face remained sharp, distorted, bestial, in the low light.


Her thoughts turned to Esclarmonde, the loyal servant, the cupbearer, the court inquisitor, who died in her sleep years ago. All her life, she served.

Her chambers are quiet. The new servants never get her tea right. They steep it too long and it tastes like chalk.


Her courtiers chatter about the latest rumors of wealth unending, of still more hidden stores of gold and jade, of new treasures, luxuries defined by their novelty and their scarcity, and of course -- the most desired treasure of any hoarder, life eternal. Now they gape agog at a Mongol who rants about a winged horse, swift as lightning and with hoofbeats like thunder. This novelty, perhaps, is worth pursuing in an idle moment.


The Sunnis - split between Mongolians along the Volga and the distant reaches of the Malian Empire, fail to retake the Arabian Peninsula and their holy cities from the armies of Timur. While the conquering king himself had a reputation for treating them and their beliefs with fairness and dignity, his sons have not given that same consideration, and so the relationship between them and the inhabitants of the holy cities have devolved into further war.


As for the empress of Tibet, her palace far removed from holy warfare, she orders the construction of a new holy mountain in the south, near Taktse.


She dreams. Most are not worth discussing. She lingers over a long vision she had of a city encircled by black iron, of clifflike buildings ashen-grey and green with pallid grime, and with dark poisonous clouds aloft, and ships of black iron, powered across the oceans by bonfires and pouring plumes of steam from belowdecks.


She no longer pretends to entertain those dignitaries and petty nobles who are beneath her - a menagerie of grotesque climbers - and she bolts away from them to perform any profane act or bestial calling that demands her.


But to her east, the Purgyals she has installed on the dragon throne are ready to resume the old networks of tribute and supplication that their predecessors so valued. Nyemets, or whatever the Carantanians call them. But what crosses over their minds? It can't be more than a token tribute.... or an attempt to encircle the Mongols...? Or... how long could it have taken for Jin ships to sail all the way across...


What was there left for her to do, except to preserve what was already hers?


Just sit in a quiet room with her thoughts, alone? Every moment idle was a void.

She rifles through her sorted stacks of manuscript paper to find the list of the emperors of Tibet, those who came before her. A court artist had sent her preliminary etchings of the portraits to be used for the printing blocks. The lives of the dead reduced to the memories and incomplete recollections of others.


There was herself, of course, conqueror of China, the inimitable, the genius, the terrible. The Greeks in her kingdom called her Griffin, the Chinese called her something more profane. Before her was her father, Zungtsen, a sturdy caretaker who fumbled an invasion of the Western Protectorate yet survived an outbreak of madness. His mother, Choden, held sway over fifty years of prosperity and was talked out of invading the Han as revenge. Before her was her mother Fuyuan, a pugilist, steadfast, a model ruler, who had seized back the throne from usurpers and tragically was ruined against the walls of the Western Protectorate.

Before her were the two usurpers, may their names and house be obliterated.

Trisong II reigned for barely a year, and lost the throne due to his total incompetence. Lha II enjoyed peace and good feelings with the Han, and led a failed journey to immortality. Before her was Pongza the Just, who killed the second Tse and promulgated absurd laws on the outlawing of all violence. Before her was the placid Pelmo II, who discovered the second Tse and brought her to court.


Before Pelmo II was Khrimalod, who with a frail body possessed an indomitable spirit and led the last conquests of the south. Before her was Chokey, who fell off the roof. Before him was Pelmo I, who oversaw turmoil and struggle and narrowly avoided a second era of disintegration. Before her was Ngawang II, the last survivor of the great plague, and died in an attempt to keep everything together. Her father was Gyal, who died of the Great Plague that scoured the world. His mother was Ngawang I, who took the throne in a civil war from Shonnu the Mutilator.

Before her was Dagmo, stoic, uncouth, strategist and survivor of the Mongolian invasions. Her mother Shonnu had died in battle against them. Her father was Sumnang, a good king who fell into drink and his wife, a Jurchen, held it together.


He took the throne from Palkhorre II, who failed to defend his rights in battle. Before him was Trinle, a good empress yet easily overwhelmed. Before her was Palhorre Blood-Axe, who died of disease, the nephew of the great

Gyalyum, the Benevolent, the Restorer of the Second Tibetan Empire, the Builder of the Church with her beloved Pakmodru Tse. Before her a century of chaos.

Then shame. She glances at the last emperors of the First Tibetan Empire and sets the paper aside. She recalls the histories of the last days of the first empire, with emperors debased their bodies dragged in the mud, the soldiers of the Tang and the once-great Caliphate hurling filth at them in the streets.

Where were they now? Tang Dynasty, Abbasid Caliphate, Empires all.


She turns a page and goes further back down the last, heading further back in time, to Songtsen Gampo, founder of the First Empire, devoted follower of Buddha, sponsor of the Tibetan alphabet, founder of archives, first collector of taxes, founder of the army, and opener of Tibet to the outside world. Buddhist though he was, his achievements were still considerable. Lhasa had barely existed at this time, and the court was still semi-nomadic.

Then the kings before the empire, mostly confined to the Yarlung Valley, each growing fainter and fainter and moving beyond history into transcendent myth. The Five Later Tsen Kings, the first to marry with other human beings and not divinities or dragons. The last of them was Thothori Nyantsen. Then before them the Eight De Kings of which there was barely anything at all but their names; then before them the Six Lek Kings, where even the order of their reigns was confused and uncertain; before them, the two middle kings, like Drigum Tsenpo, the first to die and be buried on earth and not pulled back to heaven. Then before them the Seven Heavenly Kings, who could soar over mountains, and ascended to heaven before they would die. The first of these, Nyatri Tsenpo, built the first house and tilled the first farms in all of Tibet in the Yarlung Valley.

How many of these would be remembered in two thousand years time, as she looked back on the life of Nyatri Tsenpo? Songtsen Gampo, sure, Gyalyum the Benevolent, certainly, but perhaps herself? How many of these others would fade and become as confused as the Eight De Kings, each remembered in their time?

When would the Second Empire fall? Could she know?

Could she divine this -- would she -- she had to. It would be better than not knowing.

She, without hesitation, not even calling a priest, performs a few preliminary meditations and recites the sacred utterances. She calls to the benevolent tutelary deity and calls for his guidance toward truth and away from delusion. She recites his incantation three times and then the sacred words of organization. She fixes, in her mind's eye, all the empire and its fate. She breathes softly on the die and they fall from her hands.

NA RA - bDud. The demon of the heavenly son. A demonic, deadening influence. An entity that tempted holy people to delusion... Danger, enemies, and wealth shall fade into the grey ashes of burnt silk. If the fire of desire blazes, oneself is burnt.

A bad sign. But not inevitably bad. If the die were reversed and she divines RA NA, then the negative effect is canceled. She recites the mantras -- seven times, hurriedly, blows on the dice and casts them again.

RA PA - The Demon of Death. The activity that accompanies destruction. All work is clasped by the Lord of Death. The signs are of killing, death, and destruction. As a spark of fire is extinguished by a small tint of water, all work is futile as it is clasped by the Lord of Death.

Lasya bolts up and shoves the table away with both hands, sending dice, copper inkpot, and quill clattering to the floor. Servants run in, asking if she is all right, and she shoos them. She wipes the sweat beaded on her forehead. Two different outcomes -- the possibility of negation -- there has to be. There has to be an alternate. She'd consult the state oracle...

The empress feels uneasy, the hair standing on her neck. She draws her sword and turns in a single gesture, stopping short of cutting a woman with an ageless face seated, legs crossed, on the floor.



"I am at peace with eternity. Do it if you will."

Lasya, not saying a word, sheaths her sword, makes the usual gestures and phrases of greeting, and then pours her guest a cup of tea, presenting it with both hands.

"Your presence, you're not the only -- visitor. That giant that called itself revenge, then before that your wife."

"She tells me of everything."

"How- how is she, by the way? Is she well?"

"Yes. Thank you for asking."

Lasya does not really know what to do. Tse drinks hungrily from her bowl, and Lasya tries to keep it from ever getting empty.

"May I ask why you're here?"

"Yes, let's get about it. I have something of use for your book." From her sleeves, she produces a thin squat codex, bound in rough cloth and set on even white paper, titled "A History of Tibet". "This is for your research."

Lasya takes it, with gratitude. The lines are so even. She'd need to find whatever woodcarver did the boards for printing. She flips to a random page and finds words, places, names she does not recognize. The spelling is different, the grammar is wrong. Was it written in dialect? She flips to the table of contents and finds chapters such as "The Introduction of Buddhism -- The Fall of the Empire -- Monastic Feudalism -- Jurchen Conquest -- the Tian Empire" and snaps the book shut.

"What is this?"

"A history of a different Tibet. Where there was no Second Empire and the Era of Fragmentation continued for centuries."

"How?"

"Yumtan, Gyalyum's grandfather, dies earlier, and the empire passes to his son, Palkhorre, who fails in reunifying it. Buddhism takes root and spreads, and is firmly established. Four hundred years later, the Jurchens and Mongolians, united, invade and conquer all of China and Tibet. After a century of their rule, then the Han Chinese revolt against Jurchen rule and after some decades of infighting establish their own dynasty, the Tian, which lasts for five centuries. During this time, they invade Tibet, administering it as one of their own provinces and suppress the theocratic government."

"Then what?"

"The Tian Dynasty rules for five centuries and then collapses after an invasion from foreign powers from across the eastern ocean. They murder the imperial family and establish outposts in the port cities. Tibet is again independent for a brief time under Buddhist rule."

"How brief?"

"Fifteen years. Then a Chinese warlord invades it and it is never independent again. After a brief moment of prosperity, the world sinks deeper into poverty, famine, and war and the time of the empire is looked at as a time of prosperity that will never be achieved again. "

Lasya shuddered. "So, a collection of stories. It is a morality play. A warning about this world, and that the dissolution of the First Empire was a tragedy."

"What else do you think it would be?"

"Your Presence, who would invent an entire false history? What kind of fool would do something like that?"

Pakmodru Tse blows on her hot tea and stares into it. "In that world, Tibet becomes a symbol of moral righteousness and a worthy cause, a promised land."

Lasya snorts. "What good is that if everyone's dead? It is a consolation to the defeated and a moral salve to those who claim to save others."

"Even if moral law is unachievable, it is still a goal to aspire towards."

Lasya dismisses the answer with a wave of the hand. She leans forward, her narrow eyes fixed on her guest. "Where did you get this, your presence?"

"I have to keep some secrets, your imperial majesty."

"Where have you been? Who have you spoken to? Gods or other apparitions? Who else could have told you this?"

Her face is so impassive that whatever happened was so beyond the scope of the questioner's understanding that no answer is conceivable.

"You know, your presence, I think I realize what you might be. If that was you a century ago, and that was you who founded the church. You are like one of those wandering spirits that go from world to world, or at least cursed to exile like Chang'e in the moon. In that case, you've gone to observe that corrupted world and are demanding justice in ours. But you first make the assumption that that world is more perfected than ours and is so worth imitating. And secondly, I only rule most of this world, not that. History cannot be amended. And if you want justice, it can add to your world's history, but it can not bring back the dead. You, of course, excepted."

"You do recall what my wife said to you, all those years ago. And vengeance too."

"Of course."

"Does it not trouble you?"

"No. If anything else, it is a motivation."

"Then you would not strike me down if I passed along my message."

"No, of course not."

The archrpriestess rises. She looks furtively around the room and whispers her message into the empress' ear. The empress laughs.

Meinberg
Oct 9, 2011

inspired by but legally distinct from CATS (2019)
“I wear the chain I forged in life,” replied the Ghost. “I made it link by link, and yard by yard; I girded it on of my own free will, and of my own free will I wore it. Is its pattern strange to you?”

Snipee
Mar 27, 2010
drat it, I guess we weren't blessed enough for the immortality event to trigger. Our empress will eventually die, and she leaves behind no children to continue her bloodline.

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.
"Remember, you too will die."

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.

Kangxi posted:

The archpriestess rises. She looks furtively around the room and whispers her message into the empress' ear.

"Help me Obi Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope."

The empress laughs.

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker

Kangxi posted:

The archpriestess rises. She looks furtively around the room and whispers her message into the empress' ear.

"Hold down Alt, press numpad 2, numpad 1."

The empress laughs.

xthetenth
Dec 30, 2012

Mario wasn't sure if this Jeb guy was a good influence on Yoshi.

Danny Glands posted:

Forget about Judaism, I wanna know what the latest flavor of cannibal Christianity is.

They've got tomatoes from the new world, so the main thing they're missing for proper barbecue sauce is peppers. So that's a fun side mission for EU4.

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."

Danny Glands posted:

Forget about Judaism, I wanna know what the latest flavor of cannibal Christianity is.

It changes several times during the last update. The results may surprise you

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xthetenth
Dec 30, 2012

Mario wasn't sure if this Jeb guy was a good influence on Yoshi.

Considering the desolation of Europe, I wonder how the trade routes will look.

Will they be able to get their seasonings? Will the western communion taste good?

Tune in next time I guess.

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