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Binged this thread in a week, what a ride. Does anyone else think it's kind of gruesome that Meyer's tie-in novella focuses on a child who only exists to gets murdered? It's like 200 pages of first-person narrative that ends with her literally being ripped to shreds. That's hosed up.
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Mar 1, 2020 19:52
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The evil vampire children bit is the clunkiest piece of foreshadowing ever, and it's done so hamfistedly. "This clan's coming to the wedding. Oh, and by the way, there used to be another clan member we never mentioned. And she just happened to be one of the reasons vampire children are illegal. Did I mentioned vampire children are illegal? They're really really illegal. Anyway, that clan's coming. Vampire children are illegal."
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Apr 24, 2020 00:16
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MrNemo posted:The exploration of vampire society generally is just massively disappointing. There feels like a lot of potential and some really interesting ideas regarding how vampirism works and how they are forced to structure themselves to survive. And all Meyer wants to write about is teen melodrama. I really do get that take that it's romantic self insert fan fic set in a much richer world. quote:It was after lunchtime when Rosalie glided past the bathroom door in a shimmery silver gown with her golden hair piled up in a soft crown on top of her head. She was so beautiful it made me want to cry. What was even the point of dressing up with Rosalie around? She does remember the last time Rosalie wore a wedding dress, right? It seems incredibly self-centered to worry about Rosalie out-shinning her, when the entire thing must remind Rosalie of her gang rape and murder. hyperhazard fucked around with this message at 21:49 on Apr 24, 2020 |
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Apr 24, 2020 21:30
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Jacob's reaction really comes out of nowhere. I think Meyer meant for it to be some sort of dramatic irony, since he ends up imprinting on Bella and Edward's kid  , but it comes out of nowhere. Rough sex is by far the least dangerous thing Bella has done in the entire series. (Spoilered in case anyone is blessedly unaware of how the love triangle resolves itself)
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Apr 28, 2020 03:12
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Grammarchist posted:I could "kinda" buy Jacob's character shift stemming from him becoming a monster himself, but that doesn't seem to be Meyer's intent, and the unsettling body horror element seems to have given way to mild annoyances. Apart from poor Leah, I guess, who has a lot more to deal with. I would love this whole series from Leah's point of view. She's the only girl in a super duper manly old boys' club, and her backstory is legitimately tragic. Imagine her gaining confidence in her abilities, coming to peace with her breakup, and showing the tribe that women can be powerful protectors as well. That's not exactly a ground-breaking hero's journey, but at least it would be interesting. But nope, she's a bitter harpy and we're stuck with a protagonist whose MO is to launch into hysterics every time the plot moves forward.
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Apr 28, 2020 19:50
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Taking your wife to your parents' loveshack island for your honeymoon seems like a weird flex, but ok.
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Apr 29, 2020 14:06
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So here's a fun tidbit for anyone who hasn't had the pleasure of reading the 50 Shades books: the corresponding scene in that series (book 3) involves involuntary bruising on their honeymoon as well. However because it's a garbage fire of a book, it plays out like this: - Ana decides to wear a bikini since they're vacationing in the south of France. - Christian gets angry because she's showing too much skin around strangers. He takes her back to the yacht for rough sex. He doesn't tell her it's going to be as rough as it is. He purposely bruises her entire body so that she'll be too embarrassed to show skin in public again. - Ana finds out the next morning, throws things at him in anger. - Christian placates her by buying her an expensive bracelet. She forgives him and assures him that the sex was great and he shouldn't feel bad. As emo and drawn out as this is in Breaking Dawn, I don't think anything can ever be as bad as that scene.
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May 1, 2020 03:49
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It's your body, girl! If you don't want an abortion, don't get one! Open your mouth and tell your husband. Unless you think he'll make you get one, in which case... jesus christ. Also, that movie montage from the last page was surprisingly cute. It was much more "husband and wife teasing each other" and less "emotionally manipulating my husband to have sex with me when he doesn't want to." hyperhazard fucked around with this message at 18:34 on May 5, 2020 |
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May 5, 2020 18:32
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Grammarchist posted:The random shade casually thrown at Leah is bizarre, especially when she's not even around or shown to be a bother to anyone. Sure, Paul is being a huge rear end in a top hat and thrusting himself into your family, but Billy has to spend time around LEAH. I think Leah was one of the characters named after Meyer's siblings in law. I'm starting to wonder if it was real-life Leah who leaked her unpublished book.
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May 7, 2020 20:43
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I think what gets me most about the imprinting (besides the pedophilia, good god) is that the women seem to have no say in it and Meyer's okay with that. She just kind of handwaves it away like "oh, you can't help but fall in love with someone who loves you so much." It doesn't matter if you're attracted to his personality, have similar goals in life, have shared interests or friends, actually enjoy being around him...nope, it's meant to be. Like, if my husband was the sweetest, most adoring person to me and treated everyone else in my life like poo poo, no amount of love could make me stay in that relationship. But according to these books, it's fine if your soulmate's an rear end in a top hat because he looooves you.
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May 7, 2020 21:42
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I thought it would be impossible to find a main character as loathsome as the 50 Shades ones, but I was wrong.
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May 12, 2020 18:15
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Anias posted:Maybe this is supposed to be about male gaze and how it reinforces the patriarchy. IDK, taking it at face value as it is feels gross so my brain is really trying to come up with some sort of authorial intent to deconstruct the larger ideas of selling/valuing women for their child bearing potential and all the side arguments by men about abortion while the women are strangely silenced and just do their thing as best they can. It's lazy, lazy writing, and sentences like "His black eyes burned in their sockets, out of focus, or seeing things that weren’t there. His mouth opened like he was going to scream, but nothing came out" remind me of the totally dark and edgy stories I used to write when I was 14-15.
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May 13, 2020 16:17
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chitoryu12 posted:Turns out Bella and Edward put "Berth ell pup" on all the wedding invitations. I hate that I get this.
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May 13, 2020 23:57
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Midjack posted:I did some googling and it's eluding me. https://archive.is/OBpSU Update, with the famous line: http://archive.is/wu9O5
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May 14, 2020 00:48
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chitoryu12 posted:From Meyer's perspective, Bella is in the right and will turn out to be vindicated. From a realistic perspective, Edward and Jacob are right: they don't even know if this is going to be less "viable pregnancy" and more "actual superpowered monster." Read the room. I haven't watched the movies, so I'm just picturing the scene in Frisky Dingo where Antagone gives birth to Cody 2, and Wendell rides it around the city as it crushes everyone.
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May 14, 2020 19:03
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Proteus Jones posted:He's loving savage and pulls zero punches on how much he hates the Twilight series. I used to think it was kind of crappy of him to poo poo all over the movies that launched his multi-million dollar career. Then I read that recent GQ story and realized that becoming a megastar at 20 basically ruined his life. It stopped him from having the career that he wanted, and turned him into a hermit. e: if anyone hasn't read it or seen it on twitter, absolutely read that article, especially the bit about Piccolini Cuscino. hyperhazard fucked around with this message at 17:37 on May 19, 2020 |
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May 19, 2020 17:32
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chitoryu12 posted:[Leah bares her feelings.] 
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May 20, 2020 20:07
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Isn't Meyer a mother? How do you give birth multiple times and not know how fetal nutrition works? Does she think a fetus is literally in a woman's stomach, gobbling up food? Even worse, why does her doctor character seem to think that fetuses have access to the digestive system? Is it poking a straw through the amniotic sac and into the stomach? Is Mormon sex ed this bad?
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May 21, 2020 19:54
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I'm still wondering how the hell this plot point got past the editors. Of course the fetus wants blood -- literally every fetus ever wants blood because that is how fetuses eat. If Bella is being sucked dry by monsterbaby, the answer isn't to drink some O negative. There's a reason blood transfusions aren't done with styrofoam cups and bendy straws.
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May 23, 2020 00:42
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Midjack posted:No see this magic vampire baby is just I couldn't help myself. 
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May 23, 2020 18:55
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chitoryu12 posted:Nudity was an inconvenient but unavoidable part of pack life. We’d all thought nothing of it before Leah came along. Then it got awkward. Yeah, as someone who did a bunch of sports in high school, I call bullshit on this. Sure, there's always that one person who doesn't care what they look like, and is fine walking around and chatting, but most everyone looks down at their clothes or turns so they're facing the lockers, or goes into a stall to change underwear. Teenagers are not known for being comfortable with their own bodies.
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May 25, 2020 22:54
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Midjack posted:This story seems like it’s building towards a chestburster self-C-section birth scene and we’re suddenly plunged into an Alien fanfic but I know that can’t be what happens. Alien: chestburster scene Meyer: hold my (non-alcoholic) beer
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May 26, 2020 17:26
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She was friends with Jake for like 2 months while he was normal and funny and actually supportive. Then he turned into a complete rear end in a top hat and she mourned the loss of her friend. That made sense. I've also had toxic friends, and "breaking up" with them sucks. But that was like a year ago. At this point in the timeline, he's been an rear end in a top hat for much longer than he was a friend. I don't think they've had a single conversation in the last book and a half that didn't turn into a fight or an argument over his feelings for her. He hates her husband and inlaws and makes every single event in her life, including her wedding, about himself. Why the hell would she want him around?
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May 29, 2020 23:56
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There's...a lot to unpack in that chapter. Jake's absolutely right that imprinting is creepy as hell. Even if it helps you forget about your ex, it does so by wiping out any free will. Imagine how easy it would be to take advantage of someone who was forced to love you no matter what. "Do the dishes or I'll leave." "Buy me an Audi R8 or I'll leave." "Break off all contact with your family and friends or I'll leave." "Have sex now or I'll leave." That's some Ella Enchanted poo poo right there. Hell, even take it to extremes: "I know for a fact that you love me more than our children, so kill them or I'll leave."
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Jun 1, 2020 19:47
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Dienes posted:Considering Sam nearly killed Emily, I'm thinking the imprinter will be fine. That's a good point, and very very depressing. Hell Jacob's halfway there -- he had to be restrained during the wedding to stop from hulking out and killing people. It's only a short jump to "Be with me or I'll hurt your husband and family."
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Jun 2, 2020 05:03
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chitoryu12 posted:That's the stupidest loving name I've ever heard! You need to find a clip of this scene in the movie, because it's worth watching. She says the name and none of the actors can keep a straight face. (Also, Jake's response is literally "uhhhhh...")
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Jun 2, 2020 22:07
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HopperUK posted:Why do all the Native Americans have very Biblical names? Jacob, Seth, Leah, Rachel. She named a lot of side characters after people she knows irl. Which is why I'm still convinced that it was real-life Leah that leaked her pages.
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Jun 3, 2020 01:18
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chitoryu12 posted:Lizzie So did someone win a contest or something? What the hell is this fluff? This could have been summed up in one sentence: "As my dark, bleeding, manly soul ached, I thought back to the time when I traveled two hours to Wherever Town, hoping to find my soul mate in the crowd -- but no luck." Done.
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Jun 3, 2020 19:33
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I'm still confused why a one-scene character gets a name and more detailed physical description than any of the main characters. Was there one more family member that she just had to squeeze in? Did a friend die and this is how she's immortalizing them? Did a fan win a raffle to be included?
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Jun 3, 2020 22:00
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chitoryu12 posted:“It’s a bit more than that,” he murmured. “Now that I can make out the child’s thoughts, it’s apparent that he or she has remarkably developed mental facilities. He can understand us, to an extent.” Take that, all you harlots out there aborting your
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Jun 4, 2020 20:03
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I read that to the tune of "Miss Suzie had a steamboat" until the last line, and now that's all I can hear it as.
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Jun 5, 2020 05:44
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MrNemo posted:Ah good point. I think they don't exist in the same way colonists discovered the Americas, Terra nullius and all that. The human-vampire hybrids get touched on more later, and it's important to the climax (if you can call it that, since it all builds up to nothing).
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Jun 6, 2020 17:57
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Everything about Bella in this book has pissed me off. We like martyred characters in fiction not because they martyred themselves, but because of who they were beforehand. We don't care about Johnny because he told Ponyboy to stay golden on his deathbed, we care about him because even though he's a murderer, he's the kind of person to risk his life to save children from a fire. We care about Sydney Carton because his entire arc is about redeeming himself, and he's come far enough that he's willing to give his life for his rival. Hell, if you want to go the Biblical route, the whole point of the story of Jesus' crucifixion is that he could have run away or fought back, but he didn't because that would betray the things he'd taught. Instead, Meyer treats this like an entry in a Christian martyrology. Saint Agnes: Martyred for refusing to give up her virginity. Saint Lucy: Martyred for giving her riches to the poor. Saint Bella: Martyred for keeping her child even when it threatened her life.
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Jun 8, 2020 19:13
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chitoryu12 posted:And it's not even really a "martyrdom" because she's been arranging everything for over a year to end with her being revived through vampirism anyway. Considerations of who she could be harming or what she could be sacrificing come and go within a paragraph or two, and the book comes pretty close to implying that it's a worthy sacrifice for her True Love anyway.
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Jun 8, 2020 21:37
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If you watched the movies but haven't read the book, prepare to be disappointed. The studio must have realized towards the end that the series needed some sort of dramatic climax, so the last movie just starts adding stuff, including an entire 20 minute battle sequence. It's probably the most watchable of the movies, and it includes Bella beating the poo poo out mountain lions, other vampires, and Jake.
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Jun 10, 2020 05:17
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Grammarchist posted:You know, I'm starting to think there are no stakes in this vampire story. I was going to make a pun about her being thirsty all right, but this is better.
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Jun 10, 2020 18:30
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Oh no, one of her lips is fuller than the other. Her worst flaw is apparently looking like Scarlett Johansson. What happens to people who are uglier than Bella "my lips are too big and I'm slender but not bony" Swan? Would a Mama June become a Charlize Theron? Would a Steve Buscemi turn into a George Clooney? The fact that she lost her pregnancy weight immediately and can't recognize her face seems to point towards vampires instantly becoming the standard Western ideal of beauty. Now I'm imagining some Paleolithic vampire being horrified that they're suddenly thin and white.
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Jun 11, 2020 17:28
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I hate the plot device where a heroine is in an outfit that just happens to rip the right way. Oh no, Padme was hit by a chain (??) and the bottom of her shirt was torn off. Oh no, Bella had someone put her in stilettos (lol) and a flimsy dress and has no choice but to rip it to mid thigh in order to walk. It's ok to have a female character dress sexy and confident! You don't need to come up with excuses for how she got that way!
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Jun 15, 2020 18:02
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Someone pointed out that Bella could be replaced by a camera that's dragged everywhere, and usually that's a sign that your story shouldn't be in first person. First person is hard to write well, since you have an unreliable narrator who's filtering the events through their own personality. Newbie writers like first person because it's easy to write out what you'd do in a situation, but that makes for a poo poo main character. Unless you're Somerset Maugham or something, having you be the main character in your own fictional story is boring as hell.
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Jun 23, 2020 14:46
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Nice little bit of wish fulfillment here -- no matter how busy you are, you never have to miss a second of your child's development because they'll ESP it directly to your brain later. Free babysitter, free house, a baby that can automatically express its needs and never cries, no pumping milk, no sleepless nights...this is like new parent porn.
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Jun 24, 2020 19:23
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