Idiots Thread - From the Balls of Montezuma - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Idiots Thread - From the Balls of Montezuma

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Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

That had to be like getting bitch slapped by god himself.

# ¿ Sep 10, 2019 16:48

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 05:12

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Didn't they also have a missile locked on a hot dog stand as well?

# ¿ Jan 1, 2020 22:10

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Technology is allowing us to be stupid faster.

It's also letting stupid people find large groups of other stupid people easily.

# ¿ Jan 12, 2020 06:12

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

The fact that you care enough to try is a good thing. Notice when the douchebaggery happens, see if there's a trigger for it, try to break the habit.

The sheer fact you want to should be a sign to you that you can do it.

# ¿ Jan 22, 2020 06:55

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Was that the one where the terrists took over a mall or something so the main character kills em, runs to a sports store and grabs a football, and then runs back to one of the dying terrists to put it in his hands and therefore he's not going to heaven cause he's touching pigskin?

Which, they haven't been made of pigskin in literal decades but what the hell, it's played entirely serious.

# ¿ Feb 14, 2020 19:52

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Cyrano4747 posted:

Richard Pryor has a pretty good bit on exactly that blase poo poo (lol "pretty good" it's Richard loving Pryor) from back in the 70s. And choke holds. Like gently caress the dude was joking about them choking black men to death forty years ago.

This isn't the whole thing but it's the punchline that applies to this thread.

edit : First minute or so is the bit on choke holds and police just going "whoops"

edit 2: iirc the part immediately before this has him making a joke about having a magnum pistol to kill cars for some Richard Pryor reason. Annoying kids tuning poo poo in their driveway? Street racers? Dunno. Anyways dude has a car killer magnum and then the cops get called and he peaces out for reasons that he elaborates on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWulvchFpYs

The reason is he was drunk as gently caress and the wife said she was leaving him, and taking the car. That idea was annoying to him, therefore the car needed to die, and if you are gonna kill a car, you need a big gun.

Stupid_Sexy_Flander fucked around with this message at 04:28 on Jul 8, 2020

# ¿ Jul 8, 2020 00:16

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Ah, the ol' colombian bolo tie.

# ¿ Jul 15, 2020 17:48

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

https://www.military.com/daily-news/2020/07/28/tiktok-showing-soldier-pointing-loaded-pistol-buddy-prompts-army-probe.html

# ¿ Jul 29, 2020 00:57

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

It smells like bigfoot's dick, so he might have had an adventure while camping :colbert:

# ¿ Sep 8, 2020 20:31

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

The sad thing is I forgot what thread I was in, and thought I was in the book forum, so I thought sf means sci-fi authors, and it still made sense when you consider baen's entire catalog.

# ¿ Sep 17, 2020 03:06

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Yea, the blowback from potentially undercooked chicken is pretty nasty. I don't blame anyone for sticking to what they know.

# ¿ Sep 29, 2020 02:54

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Sounds like he beat you to the punch and compressed his own chest before you medical guys could charge him for it. :colbert:

# ¿ Oct 17, 2020 23:52

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Sprinkle a little yellowcake on him and then calmly walk away.

# ¿ Oct 21, 2020 08:52

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Wouldn't just a single claymore work better than chaining a bunch together? Seems like you gotta have some serious faith in how tough your ride is if you are ok with detonating one of them, much less like a half dozen.

^^^I'm not an explosives dude at all, but there's a LOT of explosive energy directed backwards. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. One might just ruin the door or crack the radiator or something. 6 might just tip the vehicle over, depending on where they are placed, or shear the motor mounts and force the engine into the comparatively extremely squishy driver and passenger.

Stupid_Sexy_Flander fucked around with this message at 06:05 on Nov 8, 2020

# ¿ Nov 8, 2020 06:03

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Jesus. When I went to get some cream for a rash in my hand the pharmacist said "NOT FOR INTERNAL USE" and was really insistent about only using it on my hands. Now I know he was potentially ex military and knew some dumbfuck tried to lube with it.

# ¿ Dec 8, 2020 14:27

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Jesus gently caress that's horrible. The weird thing is the first song on my random playlist was "You've lost that loving feeling" when I opened the thread. Lil too on the nose for theme music.

# ¿ Dec 8, 2020 20:56

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Sounded like a good idea at the time?

# ¿ Dec 8, 2020 23:35

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Random question since we are talking about gunsmithing, how much would it be to have a custom revolver made? I know the answer is "a lot", but I'm wondering what range that lot can be. Think the revolver from Trigun. I'd imagine that would be almost a complete custom build.

Gunsmithing always fascinated me, but I never got into it.

# ¿ Dec 9, 2020 22:46

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

drat, at that point I think it'd be cheaper just to have the whole thing made to spec as opposed to reworking another pistol.

# ¿ Dec 10, 2020 03:13

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

It was just a thought experiment. I have a 3d printer and the files for printing up a 1:1 Trigun revolver, and I was struck with the thought of "Oh poo poo, what if this fired real bullets?"

I've always wanted to mod out a mauser for a solo blaster, but I rarely go shooting at the range.

Had a friend do it, even with the scope on the side that's a tank scope that you can't see poo poo through when you are holding the gun. Fun to shoot though.

# ¿ Dec 10, 2020 04:30

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Oh, god no. I'm not gonna print up a pistol and then attempt to actually shoot it. I enjoy having fingers and not being blind too much to ever endanger that.

I meant it kickstarted the idea of "I want one of these, but in metal, that goes bang bang... I wonder how much it'd be to have one just machined out?". That's all.

# ¿ Dec 10, 2020 06:40

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

I'm not in the military but over the last few pages I've learned not to use neosporin internally and also weird people shove strange things in their dickholes. So, I guess I've learned to discuss the fetish ideas BEFORE the blindfold goes on or the cuffs snap shut.

# ¿ Dec 13, 2020 05:13

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

"Wanna know how I got these scars?"

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 05:32

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Wonder if he drove a Nii-san?

# ¿ Dec 25, 2020 08:14

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

There's an entire nation state of the dramatic idiots in The Belgariad and Mallorean book series by David Eddings. They don't appear often (one's a main character) but when they do, it's normally in the middle of a big fight/war because of some inane bullshit.

# ¿ Dec 30, 2020 16:26

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

drat, one air force vet getting shot and another who mysteriously finds zip ties so he carries em around with him.

Bad week for the af.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2021 06:57

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

My favorite (if you can have one, I guess) civil war casualty was the guy who stood up and yelled "They couldn't hit an elephant from here!" and promptly got sniped by said guys who apparently could, in fact, hit many creatures at that distance.

# ¿ Jan 14, 2021 15:07

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

bulletsponge13 posted:

My favorite story is absolutely true. In AFG on a HVT mission, a Gurkha brought back the head and a hand that he lopped off when they were counter attacked and had to withdrawal. Why? PID. He told his commander, "I'm sorry I didn't get the other hand."

Took me a minute, was wondering what the gently caress pelvic inflammatory disease had to do with a head and hands, and decided I didn't wanna know...

# ¿ Jan 23, 2021 00:03

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

He said difficult, not impossible.

# ¿ Jan 26, 2021 19:38

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Big fan of his cake too.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2021 15:19

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

When the answer to "where are you from" "where are you going" and "what are your plans" is one simple sentence.

# ¿ Feb 14, 2021 17:16

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

It's the Indian cobra economy all over again.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2021 08:33

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Not gonna lie, I'd read a book about dumbasses in charge of pretty much anybody, except Sears cause I already know that one all too well.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2021 09:10

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Those sinister fucks...

# ¿ Apr 14, 2021 07:52

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

I dunno, seems like it'd channel that shockwave right into his prostate.

# ¿ Apr 24, 2021 01:26

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Basically the .500 exists to kill cars, engine blocks, that pesky feeling your dick is too small, bears, the tree behind the bear, etc.

# ¿ Apr 25, 2021 04:02

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Bonus fun of potentially losing fingers if you fire it and have your hands near the cylinder.

# ¿ Apr 26, 2021 16:34

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

I think the problem is you'd need a new pistol that can fire that load without causing the gun to gently caress up and not cycle properly.

# ¿ May 13, 2021 04:51

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

EvenWorseOpinions posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QVtsO7MmMM&t=4260s

This whole video is good, but you may not have an hour and a half so here's a portion with a good retelling of Project X-Ray, and exactly how the USAAF base got burned down

Kinda sad that project x ray didn't manage to see the problem after all.

# ¿ May 18, 2021 04:13

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 05:12

Stupid_Sexy_Flander: Mar 14, 2007; Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?; Grimey Drawer

Hey. You guys need to be nice. He lost his girlfriend in the bombing < :mad:

# ¿ Jun 12, 2021 21:46

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Idiots Thread - From the Balls of Montezuma

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