Idiots Thread - From the Balls of Montezuma - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Idiots Thread - From the Balls of Montezuma

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Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Syrian Lannister posted:

https://twitter.com/DuffelBlog/status/1169928541414273024?s=09

It would save time and transport costs.

# ¿ Sep 7, 2019 17:44

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 23:27

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Excellent Cat Owner

Terrible Troop...

# ¿ Nov 4, 2019 06:49

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Cyrano4747 posted:

If you think Clancy is bad go read some John Ringo.

He makes Clancy look like the love child of William Shakespeare and Karl Marx.

Go read Tom Kratman...No...don't.

# ¿ Feb 16, 2020 00:34

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

bulletsponge13 posted:

No MRE that I've had has been worse than Country Captain Chicken.

Dehydrated Pork and Beef Patties...

I was in when that poo poo was first issued and if you didn't rehydrate the gently caress out of them, they would absorb every ounce of water in your body and never give it back. Also, I stand by my belief that the Chocolate Covered Brownie was a candle from Pier 1 that somehow snuck itself on to the menu.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2020 17:05

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Midjack posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-VsmF9m_Nt8

Check out Benny Benassi's remix, seriously.

# ¿ Apr 5, 2020 19:34

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

brains posted:

had the typical army stress dream last night

It took me twenty years of being out of service before those finally stopped.

# ¿ Apr 20, 2020 21:15

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Cenen posted:

*Most* of the DLC missions. They should not be charging money for that weird CIA island one unless that was the one that also introduced bounties.

It was and the music in 3 is fantastic.

# ¿ May 9, 2020 04:20

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Absurd Alhazred posted:

https://twitter.com/TheWTFNation/status/1269996636421394432

No pawn shop or payday loan?

# ¿ Jun 9, 2020 05:27

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Kith posted:

Probably a repost, but, y'know. Some poo poo you just gotta post whenever you see it.

gently caress no. Just no.

# ¿ Apr 19, 2021 16:42

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

Basically the .500 exists to kill cars, engine blocks, that pesky feeling your dick is too small, bears, the tree behind the bear, etc.

cans of gravy and nacho cheese...

# ¿ Apr 25, 2021 04:06

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

At least Johnston's Atoll's in the middle of the Pacific.

# ¿ May 29, 2021 15:50

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Itchy_Grundle posted:

DOD is missing 25 mortars? How the hell does that even happen? I can see missing some BII tools or some poo poo at change of command, but weapons?

When I was at Bragg in the 80s, various White Nationalist groups were hitting platoons on FTXs and stealing their hardware M16s, M203s, M60s. I'm sure some tubes got lifted too.

# ¿ Jun 16, 2021 16:15

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Godholio posted:

I'm not saying it's the best thing ever, and there are plenty of legit reasons to dislike it. But it does bring some useful capabilities to certain areas where they're desperately needed.

I'm not really a fan of it for a lot of missions, but CSAR is one of the good jobs for it, and it has killed fewer of my friends than Blackhawks have, so I have to give it some leeway.

V-22 Crashes

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Accidents_and_incidents_involving_the_V-22_Osprey

42 fatalities in 26 years

UH-60 crashes

https://aviation-safety.net/wikibase/type/H60

The Blackhawk had 49 fatalities in its first 12 years...

# ¿ Jun 21, 2021 15:00

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

GD_American posted:

There have been literally 10 times as many Blackhawks made.

Sure, but meeting or exceeding the number of fatalities in less than 1/2 the time? Especially since I included the fatalities since it was in trials in that number (five deaths before it was even officially adopted, and the V-22 had 30 fatalities in its trial period). There were about 1,500 A-Models(the ones I was counting the fatalities on) built versus 400 V-22. Total reported fatalities on US-operated UH-60As (Not the MH-60L variant) is 160 over 22 years.

EDIT That calculates out to about 9.5 deaths per airframe for the production run of the V-22 vs. about 9 for the UH-60A. I'm not saying that the V-22 is the best, just that the numbers are a lot closer than you might think.

Humbug Scoolbus fucked around with this message at 15:38 on Jun 21, 2021

# ¿ Jun 21, 2021 15:34

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

First, I am in no way an Osprey fanboy. I just get really annoyed when people go anecdotally rather than actually looking at the facts. After that absolutely horrible string of crashes during its development, the V-22 has had 12 deaths in 14 years of service or .03 per airframe. The UH-60A in its first 14 years had 109, or .07 per frame.

Both of those numbers include shootdowns as well as crashes.

# ¿ Jun 21, 2021 16:46

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

I saw the Airborne Test Board try a heavy drop with a Sheridan and a new parachute package on Sicily DZ back in 1987. The chutes all had catastrophic failure and an AFV burned in from about a 1000'. I swear to God, every component inside the vehicle was squeezed up and out through the turret ring like a mechanical fountain.

# ¿ Jun 21, 2021 22:32

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

bulletsponge13 posted:

I wish this was on video.
I've got to see a Howitzer (whatever kind they used in the 82d in 03) and a couple Humvees burn in, in person. It's always awesome.

I also got to watch a pair of slingloaded Humvees get dropped from 150-200 feet, because it was rigged wrong, and shifted. Cut sling load, cue sad NCO noises.

I'm sure it is on video. The ACE Board filmed everything and had a couple of prop planes with aerial cameras and a thing that looked like an old AA gun trailer with cameras instead of weapons. Every time I was DZSNCO, I hoped the Board would be kicking stuff out or doing LAPES.

Some of the things I saw.
A 5-ton that had one cute fail and the other tangle so it burned in hood first, leaving a loving huge crater.
A road grader on LAPES breaking free of its tiedowns and zooming down Sicily DZ's runway under sheer momentum until it rolled across Longstreet and into the woods on the south side.
GAMA Goats and 151s being used as test weights to see just how much load a chute can actually carry and those failures were pretty exciting too.
A water bladder of some unimaginable fuckton capacity breaking free from its rigging, hitting the DZ, bouncing way too far up in the air, and rupturing at the apex, making it rain for about a minute.

# ¿ Jun 22, 2021 15:19

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

mllaneza posted:

And then there's the M-class...

That's the K with a 12" deck gun, right?

# ¿ Jun 27, 2021 15:45

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Wasabi the J posted:

Watchdogs 2 was such a good game by virtue of not being watchdogs 1.

The protagonist of Watch Dogs 1 was so unpleasant I was actually rooting for him to die at the end. Marcus in Watch Dogs 2 is awesome on the otherhand.

# ¿ Jul 12, 2021 20:56

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

CMYK BLYAT! posted:

she's 25 according to twitch profile and im calculating poo poo... so she would have joined at min in 2014 and ended in 2018?

dear god i feel old, forever war is so long

She was born after I loving ETSed after a ten year stint...I am loving old.

# ¿ Jul 19, 2021 03:02

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Somewhere there's a photo of me for my E7 board.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2021 21:04

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Wasabi the J posted:

Oh yeah that makes sense. I only took the "don't do anything let the real big dicks do everything" SERE-100 training.

I took the 'A' level and the 'C' level Army SERE back in the late-80s/early-90s, and everything that idiot did, proved he must have willfully ignored everything he was taught.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2021 19:00

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Wasabi the J posted:

My god if just saying "I'm gonna burn this fucker down," is the smoking gun, they got me on any future destruction on Ft Hood, both Joint Bases Lewis AND McCord, and the entire state of NV.

gently caress Fort Lewis

# ¿ Aug 5, 2021 03:00

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Godholio posted:

It's weird how many people in the military dip. I don't think I've got any regular smokers in my unit, now that I'm thinking about it. But the loving snack bar stocks some kind of dip packet thing.

I smoked until I was on Jump Status, then was dipping or chewing for the next nine years because you can't smoke near aircraft. Green Ramp was always a sea of spit, and you could tell where the sticks were by the lines on the tarmac. McChord wasn't nearly as bad because of fewer airborne ops.

# ¿ Aug 6, 2021 19:49

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

I've staged off of every parachute rated helo in the US Army inventory from 1988-1995 and I still love to fly in them. I can't hear worth a poo poo anymore, but I love riding in helos.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 02:31

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

MrUnderbridge posted:

Hope you're not one of the guys who did a Cobra jump at Benning.

Nope. but I have skid jumped a Little Bird.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 18:44

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Woof Blitzer posted:

That reminds me of poor guys on Sill who signed up to go to the 75th waiting like 3-4 months in the lovely rear end barracks to go to Bragg.

At least I was already on Bragg when I did that.

# ¿ Sep 1, 2021 21:06

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Vengarr posted:

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/10/10/us/politics/espionage-nuclear-submarine-fbi.HTML

It always amazes me how cheap spies are. Some light treason for 20,000 dollars in bitcoin? Your wife could make more opening an OnlyFans.

Politicians are a cheap investment too. 5 or 10K in campaign contributions and you have a Rep.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2021 20:41

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

bulletsponge13 posted:

Someone typically gets poked by a bayonet every year at division review at Bragg.

Truth. Back in 1987 that was done by one of my squadmates to the 1/325's CSM

# ¿ Oct 12, 2021 20:00

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Sparky is just loving crazy in love with M113. Don't get upset at such pure adoration. :swoon:

# ¿ Oct 14, 2021 15:58

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Is that the SA grenade on that window?

# ¿ Oct 15, 2021 17:20

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Internet Wizard posted:

Radio Bn isn�t comm, it�s SIGINT.

Which explains a lot more.

What the gently caress happens at Goodfellow? Is it the water quality or something?

# ¿ Oct 30, 2021 19:24

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Hillary 2024 posted:

https://twitter.com/spoogemane/status/1472315876242116612?s=20

That had better be a joke post I know it's not...

# ¿ Dec 20, 2021 02:33

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

canyoneer posted:

You can have it all
My empire of BRRRT

# ¿ Feb 21, 2022 01:12

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

MarcusSA posted:

At least give me another 30 drat seconds!

Yeah, there was going to be a legendary smoking coming up

# ¿ Mar 20, 2022 05:35

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

No Doctor for me, I am a Master!!!!! Bwah haha hah!

# ¿ Mar 31, 2022 06:04

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Itchy_Grundle posted:

My dad did a bunch of enlisted time in the reserves before getting a commission. As a result he was an O-1 when he decided to stop playing Army. I did the usual post ROTC commitment and got out as an O-3.

Whenever he orders soup or chowder I make sure to tell him that he's not allowed to have the Captain's Wafers.

Officers always gotta be pulling rank. Shameful.

# ¿ Apr 3, 2022 16:30

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Dick Burglar posted:

mmm milk sweat

tbf monotremes are kinda cheating

Lickin' them hot hot milk pad-dies!

# ¿ Apr 14, 2022 16:11

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

The Golden Knights are all assholes.

# ¿ Apr 21, 2022 02:05

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 23:27

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

piL posted:

I think ghee guys are a bit more trendy these days.

I'm partial to lubed lads, but there's oily gents for every taste

# ¿ Apr 23, 2022 15:24

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Idiots Thread - From the Balls of Montezuma

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