Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




i turned 35 this year and it was like my body had a built in switch to automatically slow my metabolism by 90%

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




one time during a slow day at work i yawned so hard i pulled a muscle in my neck

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Notorious b.s.d. posted:

the who recommends vaccination

i hope you dont die before you get old (talkin' bout your vaccination)

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




i was shown the gutter content of Tik Tok for the first time tonight, and i fear i've turned full ray smuckles how come you kids are so god damned stupid every single second of the god damned day

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




i noticed i have several grey hairs now in my beard

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




every time i pull a nose hair i sneeze, so it's not ideal

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Uptime Sinclair posted:

tomhanksyouvegotmail.gif

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




graph posted:

i had this done in high school on both toes. the procedure was absolutely gruesome

i got ingrowns on both big toes in high school and my soccer coach thought i was being a pussy for missing practice

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Jerry Cotton posted:

Watch this, fuckers:

GOUTSE.CX

ow my back

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




when i started dating again a few years ago i tried tinder for the first time. that was wild. i suddenly felt very old.

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




echinopsis posted:

pretty sure my diabetic body wonít even last that long, Iíve been diabetic since 21 so heart attack in 40s is likely, especially since I live pretty self destructively most of the time.

people around me donít really like hearing it but thereís no use also fantasising about a world where I am a helpful grandparent or long lasting companion. this way I can use the little life I have left to pass on my wisdom asap

my diabetic father who is like 72 and has broken eyes and feet and heart keeps saying ďone day iíll tell you and your brother these cool stories from when I was an undercover cop in the 70sĒ. like why are you waiting dad? tell the cool undercover drug cop in the 70s stories now

my grandfather did "cleanup" duty in germany towards the end of the war in 45, and i never got to hear a story. i assume he was picking up debris and sweeping floors.

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




NoneMoreNegative posted:

Man I got the 'Golfers Elbow' on the inside of my right arm and its totally ruining my sikk gainz at the gym... Srs its a weird affliction as it's a really exact and specific range of motion that will trigger it, every other exercise is fine but anything bicep-curl based, here come the pain. I'm going to look like one of those bros who skip leg day, only inverted :o:

if a saw a guy with 30" quads, big meaty calves, and then just a twinky little torso and arms, i don't know what i'd do

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Jerry Cotton posted:

literally feat. a band called "Pensioners"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zk_jvr0dm0E

:nms: for pubes



i'd forgotten what they look like lmao

they look like penn & teller got split into a five person band

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




i enjoy watching reruns of Jacques Pepin Heart & Soul on the local public channel that they play sometimes on the television in the residence social area

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




can you OD on melatonin?

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.





ok

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Gentle Autist posted:

biggest risk of death from getting high af at dance parties is dying from embarassment the next day when you think back on the poo poo you said/did, the way you danced, etc

while this is true, tragically most deaths could be prevented by realizing that nobody really gives a poo poo

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Jerry Cotton posted:

So why exactly do you have a BDSM-gear-cock on your chin.

Oh wait that's a drat fool question isn't it :doh:

oh poo poo

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




echinopsis posted:

what do you do with them like bath or some poo poo

yeah or just soak your old feet. feels good man

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




eschaton posted:

embrace it

boots
cargo pants
commando sweater
wool beanie

youíd be all set to do a knolling pic of your geriatric edc

be sure to include the Palm Prē

none of this works unless you also have the dumb mustache and 2 week stubble of an embedded special forces commando

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




i have an actual geriatric next door neighbor who likes to scold me every now and then about the bird feeder because it attracts deer and is illegal. he is my personal squirrel foe

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




https://blueridgediscoverycenter.org/blueridgediscoverycenterblog/2018/10/1/mountain-boomer

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Achmed Jones posted:

my doctor scheduled a bunch of tests and stuff to see if I have arthritis or what. also wants me to do a sleep study for apnea cause I guess my palate, much like the rest of me, has a dumb shape

i went to the doctor yesterday. he said "sounds like we've got a lot going on and not a lot of time." i told him i was having trouble sleeping, i've gained a lot of weight, and i think i might depressed. he renewed my blood pressure scrip and sent me on my way.

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




prefect posted:

i'm not sure it's good to tell everybody to bang one guy's wife

fuckin lmao

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.





posting in yospos a post from twitter about posters posting in yospos

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




prefect posted:

what are "akuma" and "dan"?

the search is over the olds thread has finally found its king

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




prefect posted:

street fighter characters i know: ken, ryu, blanka, dhalsim, guile, raul julia, m bison, mike tyson, that spanish guy who climbs the fence, the sumo guy with the hands, the girl with the kicking-real-fast thing...

i think that's it?

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




tekken: roger

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




rotor posted:

the real question is who is this Mal person and what makes his seizures so loving great

grand

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




this morning i got up and my hip hurt really bad. that's it. went to bed fine, woke up, and my hip hurt. now i'm limping around like an old pug

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




get a real massage from a human imo

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




prefect posted:

also gross: chiropractors doing their thing on pets

but i used to be able to crack my own neck all the time, and it felt great. it was better than just a stretch :sigh:

when my gf was a kid, her dad had a chiropractor do his thing on a horse

i guess it fixed the problem though. hoerses are weird

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

I've never had a gout attack, what are you people eating

roast squab, beluga caviar, and protein powder

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




here come all the dads to chat about decks and deck maintenance :rolleyes:

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Trig Discipline posted:

yesterday was my birthday so now i am even older

wtf

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




i regularly take long breaks from my computing career to go power lift with my bros and sneer at laborers

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




prefect posted:

pistachio is the best ice cream flavor

although i can't think of any that aren't good

i always thought rum raisin ice cream sounded horrible

rotor posted:

heath bars in it

correct

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




rotor posted:

beep doesn't know about boats, pass it on

lol does he know about the cars that fly?

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




Achmed Jones posted:

my lower back has been really painful lately, waking me up at night and keeping me from sleeping. I hope it's just the extra belly or the lack of stretching and that losing weight and stretching will fix it. otherwise rip me

stretch your legs like hamstrings back of the legs etc. even if it's just a lazy stretch it helps me

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Roosevelt
Jul 18, 2009

I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.




rotor posted:

can we please not use phrases like "new pus sack" please? tia.

old pus sack

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply