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A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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CoolCab posted:

why do so many of these look like those loving memes lol
memes are genetic memories resurfacing

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A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Jazerus posted:

ancient peoples by and large were acutely aware of class, it just didn't bother them in the same way. kind of like the british
How do we know? Wouldn’t most writing on the subject be from the people on top?

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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260 days calendar? this must mean it was delivered to them by people from the year 9,000,000,000.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Speleothing posted:

It's certainly an interesting question as to why 260 days for a calendar, since it's not really connectable to any periodicity of the year.

But it's also an interesting question as to why we have weeks and months that don't line up with the year. Why is it that my birthday falls on Thursday, then Friday, then Saturday, then Tuesday?
I mean, the core issue is that actual days and years simply don't line up, due to our orbit and rotation. You could fix the year at 364 days, to make dates and days always match up, but then the time of day would become unsynced from the sun and by the end of May, midnight and midday would have swapped times on the clock, before slowly shifting back again and lining up near mid October. Given that this doesn't line up with the year, this timeshift would still change year to year, so you wouldn't even deal with a consistent offset on your birthday.

If you absolutely have to make it sensible and fit the year, the only real solution is having custom names for the final day and leap days. Something like this:

Week 52: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Week 53: Endday
Week 0 (only leap years): Leapday
Week 1: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Azathoth posted:

Divide the year up into 10 months of 6 weeks with 6 days a week, and then have a 5 day intercalendar period between years. Beep boop perfect system.
I feel 12 months of six weeks, with 5 day weeks would be better. You want the bigger units to be the most divisible, as that gives you more flexibility for dividing up the year, plus you need an odd number of days in a week for the bodybuilders.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Speleothing posted:

You're overthinking it. Having the weeks not line up with the months is good, that way my birthday doesn't always fall on a Wednesday every year.
As long as you have a year that's not a whole number of days long, this will always happen. Even the "perfect" 73 week system has your birthday shift a day each leap year. And really, have you considered what you're giving up by not switching to a month-week synced system?

15 months/year
3 weeks/month
8 days/week

--> the calendar year becomes offset by five days from the solar year, each solar year, meaning the average person will get to have their birthday in every season.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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indigi posted:

is that really how they thought Japan was proportioned or is it stylistic
Java suffers from similar bloat. Though at least in that case, it kind of seems like they've attached the bottom of Borneo to it, like someone misidentified the island when drawing the map.

That said, I feel like it should be seen as at least somewhat similar to a subway map though, where certain features are emphasized because they're more relevant. So Japan is a bunch of islands on either end of the big central island where the things you should care about are.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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lollontee posted:

collected about two litres of snails from moms garden on the weekend, and thought about the english as i did the needful
snails, or slugs??

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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lollontee posted:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arianta_arbustorum

these motherfuckers. the local birds seemingly refuse to eat them
I think this means your mom either shits in her garden or has buried a body in it.

Inspector Hound posted:

To better understand stuff like this, I try to figure out what we have today that are analogous to it.

What the hell do we even have today like that. sports team mascots maybe?

e the cool S everyone drew in the third grade, but for monks
The modern analogue is drawing cool battle scenes between monsters and fighter planes.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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lollontee posted:

it is an old mansion that once belonged to the owner of nearby factory. you bet your rear end theres corpses down there
time to make some content for the modern history thread

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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can't believe these people hate the queen that much. a real royalist would've painted it.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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War and Pieces posted:

hmm this looks too complex for Europeans I think they may have had extraterrestrial help.
The vikings are descendants of Nordic aliens, some of whom migrated to the Mediterranean where they taught the Greeks how to make boats.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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fermun posted:

I know it's a throwaway joke, but the difference in how they built boats is super interesting, i think. They both started with the outside of the boat and once that was complete built a frame inside. The Scandinavians made boats in the clinker style, each plank having significant overlap with the plank above it and the plank below it.

Each plank is secured with either a nail hammered through two overlapping planks and rivet or a nail that is hammered through is bent over and the tip hammered back in on the inside

The Greeks made their boats with the planks matching up end-to-end and latched together with mortise and tenon, small holes drilled into both adjacent planks then a wooden dowel hammered into one side and the next plank hammered flush onto the dowels, then held tight through additional holes cut down from near the end of a plank to the edge, then laced together over another dowel.


Scandinavian ships were much sturdier in harsh weather, and waves that came at the side of the boat, the design allowed slightly more shifting and frame flexibility without leakage.
The Greek method seems like a hassle, though I suppose it requires less wood, there being no overlap between planks? Was getting nice long and straight planks a limiting factor in Greek/Mediterranean ship design? Or is perhaps down to the evolution of ships, with Greek ships coming out of tradition where lace made a lot of sense? Thinking of those papyrus boats the Egyptians used to make, in contrast to old Scandinavian hollowed out tree trunks.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Jazerus posted:

compared to the near-inexhaustible forests of sweden? yes, absolutely
I mean, I get that we had more trees up here, but they might still have had enough for another style of boat. Though perhaps not, given the Romans stripped Crete bare.

fermun posted:

i have no idea why the Greeks went that way, but they did eventually switch to the Phoenician Joint method. Phoenicians built their ships using Lebanon cypress and then used rectangular oak tenons with holes in them and oak dowels to lock the tenons in place, then chiseled little tunnels about halfway through the planks to use vertical lacing to hold planks that much tighter together. The Greeks switched to this method incredibly suddenly at some point, and the Romans copied this method after conquering Greece. idk if they all used cypress from Lebanon though or if that was just the preferred lumber


Literally never considered the idea of lacing a boat together, and now I find out they did it multiple ways.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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i say swears online posted:

oops turns out the design is so dumb you can only afford six and are annihilated
i feel like if you were gonna use any modernish thing, it'd be like frag grenades. just lob a bunch of them into the opposing regiment and shatter their formation.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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i say swears online posted:

even by ~1600 closing within 30 yards for a grenade would have been deadly. i think with your intent you'd be looking at grapeshot. grenades wouldn't have been as viable in the black powder era either
but you'd be shielded by a bunch of dudes all mushed together. i'm sure it'd be safer than staying in combat.

alternatively, make molotovs

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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i say swears online posted:

massed infantry does not shield each other from artillery with their protective limbs!!
i don't think a fragmentation grenade has the power of artillery shot!

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Cerebral Bore posted:

they literally started doing this in the back half of the 1600s. basically they took the biggest and strongest dudes and put them in the front to hurl small grenades at the enemy, its where the term grenadier comes from
wow, can't believe i'm going to invent a time machine and go back to the 1600s

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Weka posted:

Y'all are missing the point and thinking an empire needs to be a monarchy. Consider the phrase "the American empire". Whether or not you think it is an empire, it's a coherent concept. An empire is a collection of polities ruled by a central government, maybe with an element of unwillingness.

I do agree with people's claims that senate continued to exercise significant power under the emperors, which is the general historical rule for monarchies. I'm not overly familiar with the history of the french absolute monarchy but I'd put money on the nobility exercising significant power then and absolute monarchies are exceedingly rare.
America is a monarchy.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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dinosaur 9/11

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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War and Pieces posted:

The type of racist who loves Greeks but hates people from SWANA has obviously never read any of the hundreds of Greek stories about their founders and inventions all coming from Egypt, Anatolia Persia and Scythia
hosed up that anyone would hate people from the Solid Waste Association of North America.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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In conclusion: Slavery was forced upon America by the Dutch.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Grevling posted:

It's pretty astounding to think about how millions today could (mostly) descend from only a few hundred people who lived hundreds, not thousands of years ago.

I saw some population figures for medieval Finland and it was estimated to just 20,000–40,000 people. That's just a small town nowadays.
Granted, that figure is probably on the very low end.
You sure they did not mean withing the borders at the time? The Duchy of Finland was initially just the southwestern tip of what would become Finland.

That, or it matters a lot exactly what you mean by medieval Finland. Finland apparently grew spectacularly compared to Sweden between AD 1000 and 1500, so it really might just have been near empty the years you were looking at.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Sherbert Hoover posted:

Was there any real difference between Flavius Aetius and Ricimer aside from their ethnicity? Seems like the whole nefarious barbarian general trope of late antiquity is more of an institutional problem than anything to do with the migration.
Only one of them ended up having a huge meltdown in the Forum.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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He was obviously trying to create a love potion/perfume by distilling his manly essence.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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mawarannahr posted:

Socrates: right or wrong?
Impossible to say, as all we have is writing.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Grevling posted:

People could just go by their own definitions of modern and premodern since most people interested will be reading both threads anyway. For example I draw the line at the accession of Fredrick III of Denmark in 1536 in accordance with the current Norwegian history textbook.
That's a very reasonable position, as he was the first lawfully absolute monarch in Europe. This puts him squarely in the same category as the despots of WW2; Stalin, Hitler and Roosevelt, where before the states were at the mercy of powerful land/warlords like in Rome.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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indigi posted:

except for a couple very lucky instances (including the study of reformation and pre-reformation anti-papal imagery) my degree was all history ~1715-present with a focus on America (lol) so I come to this thread to escape. I'd be very sad if I had to read poo poo about, fuckin, commodore Perry opening Japan or the constitutional Ottoman Empire
just make an american history thread and make it illegal to mention america anywhere else

ma i married a tuna posted:

A few centuries earlier the Brits made the CofE for tax reasons, although it was more analogous to the catholic church with one big difference being its subjugation to the state, whereas the Catholic church in the late middle ages is more of a parallel state that exchanges legitimizing secular government for the right to hold lands and collect taxes.

In other words, Catholic moneygrabbing had already caused some stirrings at other former limits of the Roman empire.
? The Church of England happened after the Luther started the reformation.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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War and Pieces posted:

That move where the general just pockets the pay of slain soldiers instead of reporting their death ensuring he gets rewarded for "winning" every battle and that the unit is under manned when the mongols come in force
a heroic move, given that the mongols would probably win anyway. far better then to keep as few men under arms as possible.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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CoolCab posted:

if it's south america i assume they are referring to obsidian, which when carefully mounted as a sword or blade actually is fairly easy to get sharper than surgical instruments iirc.
yeah, the difference as i understand it is that it's not anywhere near as durable, with shards breaking off quite easily.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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500excf type r posted:

I never understood the timeline for New world human populations arriving because if the mastodons and what not started crossing 200kya, the people hunting and eating them for food would have followed them. I think there's plenty of evidence in Siberia going back a long ways of neanderthal and homo sapien habitation contemporary with when those animals began crossing as well.
That presupposes that they were already there at that point. Isn't the current accepted view that humans only left Africa like 100kya? Hard to follow an animal you haven't met yet. Of course that doesn't mean older types of homos might not have crossed earlier.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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ikanreed posted:

I think the record was 40,000, and hundreds upon hundreds was not atypical
easily solved by asking them all to order themselves from hottest to ugliest

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Some Guy TT posted:

this is what really irritates me about the tone of stuff like that article i quoted is that theres a strong moralist element at play that incels are just mad because women who are extremely smart and cool only choose objectively awesome partners and like have you ever met a guy whos had lots of sex partners theyre literally loving assholes
i don't think it's a given that they're having anal sex just because they have a lot of partners

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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War and Pieces posted:

it is so funny how extremely online incels and feminists are incapable of accepting that straight women are attracted to attractive men
isn't the whole idea with any kind of incels that they are perfectly aware that straight women are attracted to attractive men, they're just extremely mad about not being attractive themselves. also possibly not aware what is actually attractive to straight women.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Agean90 posted:

ea-nasir had a room where he collected all his complaint letters, he definitely was on board with being a poo poo bag and he loved it. Exact opposite of a nice guy
he was the ultimate sigma male

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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bedpan posted:

In Britain, the mechanisms put in place to raise enough silver to pay danegeld was immediately converted into regular taxation once the danes took their money and departed
The vikings truly were amazing, teaching their neighbors statecraft free of charge.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Azathoth posted:

Gonna speculate wildly here and say that they might have brought whatever was in the pot to a boil directly over the fire and then put it on the outer part to simmer? Could also just be that they didn't boil stuff and cooked it for longer at a lower temp. Doesn't work for everything of course but isn't that basically what sous vide is?
Braising bad cuts of meat over a long period of time at a lower temperature helps break down collagen that would otherwise make eating it a bad experience. Sous vide is basically just bringing meat that, from a texture point of view, could be eaten raw, up to a temperature that's safe to eat.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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my dad posted:

Fun fact: One of my formative internet experiences was a friend showing me a... I forgot if it was a Paradox or Total War forums thread where there was a 'nationalist balkans slapfight' between 3 guys, and then following the accounts' history and demonstrating that all 3 of them were actually Finnish dudes pretending to be something else - not even in a coordinated manner since they didn't seem to have earlier interactions, they seemed to have all thought that the other two were the real deal.
I think this means you're likely Finnish. Just like there's a 50% chance that Dutch posters are Swiss.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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Armadillo Tank posted:

Don't post your sissy hypno fetish in the history thread please (unless it's ancient Greece related idk)
sissy? reported for anti-illyrianism

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A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

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AnimeIsTrash posted:

When I was a teenager I used to play a lot of maplestory. Some guy in my guild used to say all kinds of weird stuff I never understood about stuff from the balkans. Don't know what happened but one day he broke down and admitted he was just a teen from Michigan.

Lol
And what is special about Michigan? It has the only counties in the US in which Finns are the largest ethnic group.

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