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Wise Learned Man
Apr 22, 2008

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS


Lipstick Apathy

I wonder if the Fyre Festival-style postmortem documentary about this debacle will be called Star Citisn't or Citizen Con.

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AbstractNapper
Jun 5, 2011

I can help

Enchanted Hat posted:

I heard that Star Citizen is bad

Oh, have some heart.
It's pre-alpha for Chris shake

Meridian
Nov 7, 2014





Dogeh posted:

So if Store Citizer is in the Games section now, it must mean that it is a game now.








When did that happen?

He is beginning to believe.

Dogeh
Aug 30, 2017

ShitMeter: -------------|- 99%


Are we still doing taxxe?

Sandepande
Aug 19, 2018


Shiny thread.

Dogeh posted:

Are we still doing taxxe?



YES

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

No hunks allowed, ya dangus

JazzFlight posted:

Alright, now that we're on a new thread, can I finally find out where the hell this crazy story originated in the first place?

From the fevered brain of one of the backers. This game attracts a lot of cool, normal people. And Nazis.

Shazback
Jan 26, 2013


Is there an official recipe for the Hairy Roberts?

Dogeh
Aug 30, 2017

ShitMeter: -------------|- 99%


Shazback posted:

Is there an official recipe for the Hairy Roberts?

Mostly made from whale milk.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

C-Bangin' it



Ahhhh, I knew I sensed a disturbance.

SirViver
Oct 22, 2008


!raffle

Some dumb idiot
Jun 6, 2012

Step by step
Hop the mountain
Step by step
Hop the ocean
Step by step
Hop the rainbow
I'll be running


Getting my foot in the door of a new thread, here's to lurking another 3 years in here as this ride never ever ends.

One day we will discover the sickening truths behind this project.

Tippis
Mar 21, 2008

It's yet another day in the wasteland.


Zazz Razzamatazz posted:

From the fevered brain of one of the backers. This game attracts a lot of cool, normal people. And Nazis.

Now, now. Let's not be exclusionary — there's also a lot of paedos (community managers, community favourites, contest winners etc).

MedicineHut
Feb 25, 2016



Burns posted:

We already have an SC thread in GBS.

Yeah, it does not have the same fidelity and ambition though. Does that thread punch about its weight yet?

rePool
Apr 18, 2019

Undercover Goon.

So long and thanks for all the fish




Here's to another decade of showing tojal how to be more positive.

AbstractNapper
Jun 5, 2011

I can help

You know how you can tell this game is the real deal?

The referral contests.

Jonny Shiloh
Mar 7, 2019
You 'orrible little man


rePool posted:



Here's to another decade of showing tojal how to be more positive.

Nice to see Erin getting a hug off his brother there.

Ashrik
Feb 9, 2009

WILL AMOUNT TO NOTHING IN LIFE.

Oh, I think I've bought access to this thing many many years ago. Can I install something and/or play it?

Bargearse
Nov 27, 2006

Don't get your pen, son, you won't be needing that. My order's simple, a shitload of dim sims. And I want a bucket of soya sauce.


Just been going through some really old emails and it turns out I backed this dumpster fire early enough that I got a VIP golden ticket, and still no game

Neurotic Roleplay
May 20, 2005



jesus christ how broke is your brain if you keep up with and talk about this dumb loving game. and no, you aren't doing it "ironically"

Anticheese
Feb 13, 2008

$60,000,000 sexbot




Ashrik posted:

Oh, I think I've bought access to this thing many many years ago. Can I install something and/or play it?

It's basically unplayable. You can certainly install something though and your trip report will be welcomed.

iospace
Jan 19, 2038




Fun Shoe

Neurotic Roleplay posted:

jesus christ how broke is your brain if you keep up with and talk about this dumb loving game. and no, you aren't doing it "ironically"

Tell us how mad you aren't, thanks.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

C-Bangin' it



Bargearse posted:

Just been going through some really old emails and it turns out I backed this dumpster fire early enough that I got a VIP golden ticket, and still no game

That golden ticket might actually go for something on the market.

SolusLunes
Oct 10, 2011

I now have several regrets.



Neurotic Roleplay posted:

jesus christ how broke is your brain if you keep up with and talk about this dumb loving game. and no, you aren't doing it "ironically"

friend you're posting in the games forum

i don't know what you were expecting

we're all brokebrains down here

Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life

Fallen Rib

Ashrik posted:

Oh, I think I've bought access to this thing many many years ago. Can I install something and/or play it?

Yeah sure. You need this or this add-on and then go here. Make sure your credit card is at hand. Seriously 725 $? for a JPEG?

Ashrik
Feb 9, 2009

WILL AMOUNT TO NOTHING IN LIFE.

Anticheese posted:

It's basically unplayable. You can certainly install something though and your trip report will be welcomed.

Well the installer seems normal. Here I go

e: wow I made this star citizen account in 2013.

Ashrik fucked around with this message at 13:59 on Sep 6, 2019

Bargearse
Nov 27, 2006

Don't get your pen, son, you won't be needing that. My order's simple, a shitload of dim sims. And I want a bucket of soya sauce.


Colostomy Bag posted:

That golden ticket might actually go for something on the market.

Since they’re not giving me a refund any time soon I might look into that.

SolusLunes
Oct 10, 2011

I now have several regrets.



Ashrik posted:

Well the installer seems normal. Here I go

where you go, we cannot follow

mostly because you're going to crash to your own desktop

Tippis
Mar 21, 2008

It's yet another day in the wasteland.


Ashrik posted:

Oh, I think I've bought access to this thing many many years ago. Can I install something and/or play it?

Anticheese posted:

It's basically unplayable. You can certainly install something though and your trip report will be welcomed.

Just note, previous versions of their patcher have essentially being DDoS tools (except you aim it at your own network), and their FAQ to deal with installing and patching issues starts out with a guide on how to disable UAC, as if that's the most sensible immediate remedial action they can think of.

So it's definitely one of those can ≠ should deals.

ZekeNY
Jun 13, 2013

Probably AFK

The SCAM is dead, long love the scam.

monkeytek
Jun 7, 2010

It wasn't an ELE that wiped out the backer funds. It was Tristan Timothy Taylor.


I demand The Titanic be rechristened with a bottle of Commandos tears for the successful the launching of this thread!

I understand her hull may be a little compromised after all these years, but compared to the average SC ship you at least don't fall through the floor and ramps don't get me started about ramps.

Tolth
Mar 16, 2008

PÄDOPHILIE MACHT FREI


What the hell is wrong with people who fall for this? How much of a mark do you have to be?

monkeytek
Jun 7, 2010

It wasn't an ELE that wiped out the backer funds. It was Tristan Timothy Taylor.


Neurotic Roleplay posted:

jesus christ how broke is your brain if you keep up with and talk about this dumb loving game. and no, you aren't doing it "ironically"

How much are you in for commando?

Hav
Dec 11, 2009



Fun Shoe

Neurotic Roleplay posted:

jesus christ how broke is your brain if you keep up with and talk about this dumb loving game. and no, you aren't doing it "ironically"

All of these people, doing things I don't agree with. It's literally tyranny. I'm going to tell you all exactly what I think, and the devil take every last one of you.

Also, have you checked where you are?

iospace posted:

Tell us how mad you aren't, thanks.

Page 2. A new record.

Meanwhile...
'Report: on GTA V sales, "Rockstar North has apparently not paid any corporate tax in the United Kingdom and has claimed 42 million UK pounds in tax credits" from a fund meant for “culturally British” games and "small and medium sized businesses"'



Tolth posted:

What the hell is wrong with people who fall for this? How much of a mark do you have to be?

I can sell you a small pamphlet for $10.

Dogeh
Aug 30, 2017

ShitMeter: -------------|- 99%


Neurotic Roleplay posted:

jesus christ how broke is your brain if you keep up with and talk about this dumb loving game. and no, you aren't doing it "ironically"

This IS the game.
You choose a side.
If you go with "Backers" side, you have to buy a jpeg or the $27,000 completionist package.
If you go with "Dead Gay Comedy Forums", you have to mercilessly follow and harass the "Backers" until they refund or complain bitterly about it in .

The only winner is Chris Roberts' bank account.

monkeytek
Jun 7, 2010

It wasn't an ELE that wiped out the backer funds. It was Tristan Timothy Taylor.


Tolth posted:

What the hell is wrong with people who fall for this? How much of a mark do you have to be?

The scariest part is they actually get mad when people ask for accountability.

The feeling is, among the most faithful, they are lucky to be part of the journey and they have no "right" to any expectations.

intardnation
Feb 18, 2016

I'm going to space!



AbstractNapper posted:

They have been laying, cleaning out and streamlining the pipelines for years.

So, currently they have lots of pipelines.

But have they been refactored.

Star
Jul 15, 2005

Guerilla war struggle is a new entertainment.


Fallen Rib

The release of this week’s roadmaps has quickly become one of my favorite things about Fridays. I hope they will still continue with that despite the revolutionary “staggered” development.

Orange Fluffy Sheep
Jul 26, 2008

Bad EXP received


I haven't checked on this thing in ages, seems to mostly be in the same state it was before, a barely-functioning pre-alpha with the devs still making wild promises about the ship jpgs.

Hav
Dec 11, 2009



Fun Shoe

monkeytek posted:

How much are you in for commando?

Nonono, you misunderstand; Neurotic Roleplay is actually giving a medical diagnosis and has wandered into the somethingawful.com games section by accident, wandering past the awful Skyrim mods and terrible hentai games on Steam to point out that enjoying the slow-motion collapse of the largest crowd-funding 'game' is somehow more broken-brained than....<checks notes>....'tit spikes'? Do I have that right?

It makes you really think.

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Tippis
Mar 21, 2008

It's yet another day in the wasteland.


Tolth posted:

What the hell is wrong with people who fall for this? How much of a mark do you have to be?

To be fair, irrespective of the backers' protestations to the contrary, it's quite likely they're no longer accumulating new suckers at any useful rate. If they were, it would still be a prominent part of their marketing like it was in the early years (2012–2017 or so), but now it's all about the total sum raised. So the people who fell for it did so long ago and are now just stuck in a deep sunk-cost hole where they must believe it to be true because the alternative is too horrible to contemplate.


After all, this timeframe is completely normal and you know nothing of game development.




For the newcomers: CIG has consistently gotten the same tax credit for a game that's roughly as “culturally British” as… oh, let's say bratwurst. The payday loan the OP mentions happened a couple of years back when they were running dry close to account reporting time because they couldn't quite be sleazy enough to go full Enron and report uncertain future backer funds as income, and instead got Coutts to cover them until the tax rebate for that year kicked in. Their financial position was so solid that they had to throw in the entirety of their main IP rights as a collateral to cover that £3M shotfall for about 6 months.

Tippis fucked around with this message at 14:05 on Sep 6, 2019

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