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a cyborg mug
Mar 8, 2010




Thanks for posting this, watching it with some friends while drinking and it’s a fucken riot

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Wise Fwom Yo Gwave
Jan 9, 2006

Popping up from out of nowhere...


Gaz-L posted:

Marko Stunt's done some wacky poo poo where he springboards, gets caught, tossed, thrown again and then does a DDT.

It was actually Marko Stunt that inspired the question!

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Caught up on this thread and this was a while back, but...

inthesto posted:

What's the rough timeline on the Orange Cassidy character? As in, when did OC switch from "guy in green tights" to "Chuckie T's hungover buddy", and then went from heel to face? Also, did OC and Fire Ant exist at the same time in Chikara?

I want to say that he made the switch in maybe late 2011/early 2012. Looking at Cagematch, that seems to be when his matches get a lot shorter and he starts teaming up with Chuck Taylor and Drew Gulak more. I think that's when the Gentleman's Club YouTube series started up, but that's been scrubbed from YouTube.

OC and Fire Ant very much coexisted in Chikara. For the most part, OC was kind of a side-character who would show up for special occasions as part of Gentleman's Club 8-man tag matches with Chuck Taylor, Drew Gulak and Swamp Monster. Then they did the Challenge of the Immortals season, which was a gigantic double round robin tournament made up of ten 4-man stables. Gentleman's Club was one of the teams, but so was Battle Hive (which had Fire Ant) and BDK (which had Soldier Ant). Since the tournament matches could be anything from one-on-one, tag, trios, or 8-man, there was no danger of being forced into a match featuring both OC and Fire Ant or Gulak and Soldier Ant.

OC stopped showing up in Chikara as Chuck Taylor started straying away from the company in 2016. He remained Fire Ant for another three years.

This does remind me of a funny thing from back in the day. In early 2012, Chikara released a puzzle fighter game for people in the fan club. The storyline was that you'd pick a wrestler and they would meet some mysterious scientist with a time machine. Everyone had some reason to want to go back in time and change history. All the endings were depicted as comedic downers with live-action screenshots of Chikara guys.

Chuck Taylor's story was about he was annoyed about the time FIST (Akuma and Icarus) had to defend the tag titles, but Akuma was injured so Chuck (who had already lost a singles match that show) was forced to take his spot and they lost. After you play through that scenario and rewrite time, it shows that years later, Chuck and Icarus are still tag champs, but Icarus is horribly banged up from all these years of title defenses. So Chuck has Icarus replaced with new FIST member Orange Cassidy. The end.

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
Is there a complete list of who played all the ants?

Beef Jerky Robot
Sep 20, 2009

"And the DICK?"

Benne posted:

Is there a complete list of who played all the ants?

Cassidy was Fire, Drew Gulak was Soldier, Green/Silver was Tracy Williams I think? I don’t know that the rest ever became names.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010

Beef Jerky Robot posted:

Cassidy was Fire, Drew Gulak was Soldier, Green/Silver was Tracy Williams I think? I don’t know that the rest ever became names.

Not an Ant, but John Silver was the Shard

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003



Missile Assault Ant was Missile Assault Man

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

I was thinking about retired/retiring wrestlers.

And I was wondering who are wrestlers who retired "well"? I don't necessarily mean those who retired with lots of money, nor those who did well in the wrestling industry post retirement, (Hogan pre-divorce as an example for the first and Lance Storm for the second).

I am thinking of those who led happy, healthy lives once they had finished in the ring. These two things are very important. Happy and healthy. Because for every Shane Douglas miserably working at Target story there must be a Victoria happily running her Pizza restaurant equivalent.

I know this might be a tricky question, because if they got out of the wrestling industry successfully, and are just living their lives happily somewhere, then they would probably be hard to track down. But I like to think that there are some people happily working in an office, or as a carpenter somewhere with their family and health intact that reminisce about how they used to be famous and pretend to punch people years ago.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010

BrigadierSensible posted:

I was thinking about retired/retiring wrestlers.

And I was wondering who are wrestlers who retired "well"? I don't necessarily mean those who retired with lots of money, nor those who did well in the wrestling industry post retirement, (Hogan pre-divorce as an example for the first and Lance Storm for the second).

I am thinking of those who led happy, healthy lives once they had finished in the ring. These two things are very important. Happy and healthy. Because for every Shane Douglas miserably working at Target story there must be a Victoria happily running her Pizza restaurant equivalent.

I know this might be a tricky question, because if they got out of the wrestling industry successfully, and are just living their lives happily somewhere, then they would probably be hard to track down. But I like to think that there are some people happily working in an office, or as a carpenter somewhere with their family and health intact that reminisce about how they used to be famous and pretend to punch people years ago.

Jerry Lynn. He wrestled ol' Lance T. Storm one last time, then ride off into the sunset.

Rick Martel took the hint after WCW.

Had this been a short time ago, I'd have said Edge & Christian.

I'm glad Mick has seemingly quit for good.

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
Rick Steiner quit to become a real estate agent

Hirez
Feb 3, 2003

Weber scored 49 points?

:allears: :allears: :allears:
Godfather & Disco Inferno as stripclub bouncers?

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
IIRC Godfather was a bouncer before he got into wrestling, hence his "tough guy" rep in the locker room

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Nash seems pretty happy in retirement

well, as happy as he can be. From interviews and stuff, I think he's a bit of a troubled person.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010

Randaconda posted:

Nash seems pretty happy in retirement

well, as happy as he can be. From interviews and stuff, I think he's a bit of a troubled person.

I mean, he's a wrestler.

DeathChicken
Jul 9, 2012

Nonsense. I have not yet begun to defile myself.

Tito Santana quietly retired to be a Spanish teacher, having wrestling matches every couple of years when he feels like it

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer


I don't think Chris Nowinski is HAPPY about his work with CTE, but I think it's definitely satisfying for him.

fatherofmustard
May 15, 2018

Trish

Ganso Bomb
Oct 24, 2005

turn it all around

Steve Blackman, Bounty Hunter seems like he found a happy place though it's not normal in the least.

Victoria, Gail Kim, Stacy Keibler, Torrie Wilson, and AJ Lee come to mind too. Actually a lot of WWE women's wrestlers seem to have left the business and are much happier for it.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


I'm very happy AJ Lee got out with her health and happiness intact, especially considering she was still active when they pulled the bullshit with Punk and sending him his "you're finally out of here" forms on their wedding day. They definitely didn't make it easy on her

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

molly holly and her husband spike dudley

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into Wawa.

Defiance Industries posted:

I don't think Chris Nowinski is HAPPY about his work with CTE, but I think it's definitely satisfying for him.

Secondhand knowledge, but Nowinski is very busy and happy in his field - I had coworkers who knew/worked with him. He was nice, but definitely hit on female coworkers. Their experience was a positive one, so nothing about it came off creepy.

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into Wawa.
What the hell is going on in Virgil’s instagram? It’s complete nonsense about ... meatsauce?

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

BAEST MODE!!!

Red posted:

Secondhand knowledge, but Nowinski is very busy and happy in his field - I had coworkers who knew/worked with him. He was nice, but definitely hit on female coworkers. Their experience was a positive one, so nothing about it came off creepy.

He's also letting himself and his group be used by WWE to white wash things.

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.


BrigadierSensible posted:

I was thinking about retired/retiring wrestlers.

And I was wondering who are wrestlers who retired "well"? I don't necessarily mean those who retired with lots of money, nor those who did well in the wrestling industry post retirement, (Hogan pre-divorce as an example for the first and Lance Storm for the second).

I am thinking of those who led happy, healthy lives once they had finished in the ring. These two things are very important. Happy and healthy. Because for every Shane Douglas miserably working at Target story there must be a Victoria happily running her Pizza restaurant equivalent.

I know this might be a tricky question, because if they got out of the wrestling industry successfully, and are just living their lives happily somewhere, then they would probably be hard to track down. But I like to think that there are some people happily working in an office, or as a carpenter somewhere with their family and health intact that reminisce about how they used to be famous and pretend to punch people years ago.

Tito Santana wrestled, saved his money, semi-retired before his body was wrecked, and is now a Spanish teacher and basketball coach in New Jersey. He trains people at the IWF school when he wants to, and wrestles a few matches a year when he feels like it.

Edit: beaten to it

DeathChicken posted:

Tito Santana quietly retired to be a Spanish teacher, having wrestling matches every couple of years when he feels like it

STING 64
Oct 20, 2006

Hirez posted:

Godfather & Disco Inferno as stripclub bouncers?

Godfather was a club owner, do he was doing well for himself. Disco still works the door at one of the better known Vegas strip clubs on weekdays.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Tito Santana ruled and I'm so glad that he didn't let Rick Martel's cruel and vile breaking up of Strikeforce wreck his life :patriot:

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into Wawa.

MassRafTer posted:

He's also letting himself and his group be used by WWE to white wash things.

Ugh. How bad is it?

Hirez
Feb 3, 2003

Weber scored 49 points?

:allears: :allears: :allears:

Canadian_Death_Tour posted:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canadian_Death_Tour
The Canadian Death Tour or Northern Hell Tour, and sometimes just known as the "Death Tour" is a professional wrestling tour of the northern territories of Canada promoted by Tony Condello annually for over 30 years during the winters. The tour takes wrestlers from all over North America and drives them around the Inuit communities which are rarely exposed to wrestling.

The tour derives its name from the fact that many wrestlers who participate in it found it to be a near-death experience due to how harsh and difficult it was to complete.[1] To complete a death tour is considered a badge of honour and evidence of a wrestlers toughness, similar to having been trained in "the Dungeon".
...
Dorian Vance Nevada has stated that he had always wanted to do the tour because it was such an important piece of Canadian wrestling lore; with its alumni reading like a "who's who" of the business greats.[7]


Never heard of this before and it sounds pretty crazy.

Notes:
Edge - Copeland almost drove a crew van into a football-field sized hole in the ice of a lake.
Don Callis - Got booked to wrestle a murderer.
Matt Hart - Hart turned 23 during the tour, it was otherwise relatively uneventful and he suffered no other steps closer to death :laugh:

Halloween Jack
Sep 12, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 15 hours!
Kenny Omega talked about his death tour experience in his interview with Cabana.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Benne posted:

Is there a complete list of who played all the ants?

Fire Ant = Orange Cassidy

Soldier Ant = Drew Gulak

Worker Ant = Unknown. He only wrestled for about two years before retiring.

Carpenter/Pink Ant = Pinkie Sanchez. Identity was part of the story.

Green/Silver Ant = Tracy Williams

assailANT/Worker Ant II = Most I could find was that he briefly wrestled elsewhere as "Zito," but mostly just did the Worker Ant gimmick.

combatANT = Unknown. Was only active for six months. Came back briefly for the Ashes storyline, then vanished without explanation.

deviANT = Unknown.

Missile Assault Ant = RB Banks/Victor Vigilante

Orbit Adventure Ant = Unknown. Was only around on and off for two years.

Arctic Rescue Ant/Bullet Ant = Jixx/Magod Ali. Also wrestled as Ursa Minor in the Night Sky in Chikara.

Thief Ant = Unknown. A Wrestle Factory student who used the gimmick elsewhere.

Green Ant II = Unknown. Same deal.

jesus WEP
Oct 17, 2004


Was Swamp Monster multiple people? I always thought it was Gulak too but they tagged a few times

Admiral Joeslop
Jul 8, 2010




There wasn't a Queen Ant?

CombineThresher
Apr 10, 2006

GIT R DONNE

jesus WEP posted:

Was Swamp Monster multiple people? I always thought it was Gulak too but they tagged a few times

I think Swamp Monster was originally a trainee who Quack described as "moving like some kind of swamp monster," inspiring Chuck Taylor to drunkenly purchase a ghillie suit from Amazon for said trainee.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010
What would you guys say is the most egregious instance of Jeff Jarrett going over when he should not have in TNA? Raven? AJ Styles? Monty Brown?

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

BAEST MODE!!!

El Gallinero Gros posted:

What would you guys say is the most egregious instance of Jeff Jarrett going over when he should not have in TNA? Raven? AJ Styles? Monty Brown?

Raven as that match actually did their highest PPV number to date and there was interest in Raven in a way none of the other people he beat really had. AJ wasn't so much not winning the big one it was not winning it the right way.

Neodoomium
Jun 20, 2001

You are now hearing this
noise in your head.



There was a period of time where Jarrett would take some unreal amount of punishment and then win with a single Stroke so all of those

bartok
May 10, 2006



Jeff Jarrett going over Monty Brown is the one that upset me at the time. I was all in on The Alpha Male being The Guy in TNA and eventually WWE. The guy could cut amazing promos and the Pounce is an amazing finisher.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Admiral Joeslop posted:

There wasn't a Queen Ant?

Strangely, there was never a woman with the ant gimmick considering Chikara's love for intergender wrestling.

Now that Chikara's all done with and I'm incredibly bored, here's the summary of the Colony and its spinoffs and bizarre roster changes:

Starts off with Fire Ant and Soldier Ant as a tag team in 2006. Fire speaks in pumped up grunts and Soldier only yells the occasional military catch phrase. At the end of 2006, they're joined by Worker Ant, who becomes the mouthpiece. He becomes a parody of indie wrestlers in general with his fanny pack, limp handshake to the fans, Ribera Steakhouse jacket, rolling suitcase, etc. For a little while, he alters his gimmick to Stan ANTson. Due to mounting injuries, Worker Ant is written out with a career-ending injury angle in early 2009.

The Colony's new third man is Green Ant, named because of his rookie status. There's a storyline in 2009 where Pinkie Sanchez finds himself unable to find acceptance with anyone as a tag partner. Suddenly, a mysterious guy named Carpenter Ant starts showing up to aid the Colony. The Colony ends up accepting him for the most part, but he proves himself a bit too dickish in the ring for their tastes and they start to keep their distance. Carpenter Ant unmasks as Pinkie during the initial BDK reveal at the end of 2009 and then starts dressing up as Pink Ant as a way to mock the Colony.

The Fire/Soldier/Green roster makes it to the finals in the 2010 King of Trios, only to lose to the BDK A-Team. They instead win the 2011 tournament. Then everything gets weird.

In 2012, an invading faction shows up called Gekido that's made up of 17 (evil Quack), Shard (evil Jigsaw) and the Swarm, which is assailANT, deviANT and combatANT. The Swarm is explained to be "Jose and the two Franks," a trio of Wrestle Factory washouts who put up a website about how Chikara was bullshit for making its students pay their dues. In the middle of the year, the main Chikara guys get a decisive win against Gekido in a ten-man tag.

At the time, the company is run by Wink Vavaseur, a parody of Dixie Carter. He comes up with his own Money Ball system that involves mixing and matching stables for reasons that only make sense to him. This includes having Soldier Ant and assailANT switch teams going into KOT 2012. Both teams lose in the first round. They write out combatANT by having Quack (who is morally fed up with Gekido) snap his neck.

The two ant stables are still forced to keep their traded rosters. deviANT and Soldier Ant continue to team up, but it's not working. Instead, Wink decides to franchise the Colony concept and puts Soldier Ant in charge of three new wrestlers called the Colony XTREME Force with gimmicks based on special edition action figure novelties. There's Missile Assault Ant, Orbit Adventure Ant and Arctic Rescue Ant. The insinuation is that these guys are hired mercenaries playing along with ridiculously stupid gimmicks. Eventually, Soldier Ant quits the company out of frustration and goes AWOL. deviANT becomes the leader of the XTREME Force.

Meanwhile, Fire and Green are stuck with assailANT, who is earnestly trying to get fans to cheer him and the other ants to let him help with their team-up moves. Near the end of 2012, it seems like they're warming up to him.

Then Chikara does its big Ashes storyline through 2013-2014. deviANT, combatANT (complete with neck brace), and the XTREME Force are part of the anti-Chikara contingent called the Flood. Fire and Green are off trying to find Soldier, but with no luck. They also come across a wheelchair-bound Worker Ant who suggests Green take over his moniker (he's no longer a rookie by this point, after all). It's also apparent that Fire and Green actually don't trust assailANT whatsoever. In the end, assailANT proves himself as a good dude and is bestowed the Worker Ant persona.

As Chikara returns, they do the big Chikara vs. Flood storyline with a mind-controlled Soldier Ant on the Flood's side. He has kind of a "Winter Soldier Ant" gimmick where he barely sells anything and the Colony can't seem to get through to him. combatANT vanishes from the angle without explanation. deviANT loses a tag match and is MURDERED by Flood leader Deucalion for his failure. Orbit Adventure Ant and Arctic Rescue Ant sort of stop showing up for a while, which is fine, as Missile Assault Ant is the breakout player of the trio.

In 2015, Missile Assault Ant drops the ant gimmick when Kevin Condron confronts him and talks about how he knows that Missile Assault Ant blew up a bus full of children in Zimbabwe. He becomes Missile Assault Man and his gimmick is that he's really good at wrestling, but he also has crippling PTSD. That... that's it. During the King of Trios Tag Gauntlet, Orbit Adventure and Arctic Rescue return. Condron wants Missile Assault Man to kill Orbit Adventure, but he refuses. Condron does the deed instead.

2015 is the Challenge of the Immortals tournament and while the Flood is no more, Soldier Ant has defaulted to being part of the BDK, under the influence of Jakob Hammermeier. Notably, Fire and Worker II are part of Amasis' team the Battle Hive. At King of Trios, they enter together with Amasis being "EgyptiANT." The season ends with Fire vs. Soldier, where Jakob accidentally punches Soldier so hard that Soldier remembers who he is and reunites with the Colony.

In 2016, the big angle is the HeXed Men stable. Worker Ant II becomes friends with Arctic Rescue Ant and has him rebrand as Bullet Ant. Worker Ant II puts together a team called Just a Lot of Ants (JLA) made up of current and former ants (including Pink Ant, EgyptiANT, Missile Assault Ant) to stop the HeXed Men, but it doesn't work out. Also, over the course of the end of 2016 and early 2017, Frightmare delivers various career-ending injuries to Soldier Ant, Silver Ant, Worker Ant II and Bullet Ant. All that's left of the Colony is a really pissed off Fire Ant.

Fire Ant and Ophidian try to put together an anti-invader group called the Furies to protect Chikara. It absolutely fails. At King of Trios 2017, a frustrated Fire Ant gets his team disqualified because he won't stop beating the utter poo poo out of Frightmare, which puts Frightmare on the shelf for the rest of the year. Soon after, Fire starts violently lashing out at others, including his own allies.

In 2018, two new rookies show up named Green Ant II and Thief Ant. They do okay enough, but Fire Ant angrily beats them down. Either he's insulted by their choice in gimmicks or he feels like he's saving them from a horrible fate. Worker Ant II makes his return to mentor the duo and tries to get Fire Ant to listen to reason. Even Soldier Ant (blind due to having both antennae torn off) appears before the rookies to advise that they keep at it and save Fire from himself. Fire is reluctantly put with Green and Thief at King of Trios. Throughout the tournament, he gradually gains respect for them and as they win, he accepts them as the Colony.

Fire Ant's last appearance in Chikara is King of Trios 2019 where they lose the semis. Thief and Green have done random matches here and there with no real story. No idea if they're going to be keeping those gimmicks on the indies going forward. Worker II did announce that Chikara's real deal downfall is a good enough time as any to announce his retirement.

Resident Idiot
May 11, 2007

Maxine13
Grimey Drawer

Gavok posted:

Also wrestled as Ursa Minor in the Night Sky in Chikara.
.

That may be the greatest wrestling name of all time.

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Price Check
Oct 9, 2012

Wise Fwom Yo Gwave posted:

You know how there’s the John MorrisonKofi Kingston “Royal Rumble” spot?

Can anybody set me up with the longest transition from leaving their feet and being the “deliverer” of a DDT? I’m looking for that Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4 chain-move revert-into-manual-into-grind-into-caveman bullshit.

Pretty sure Jody Fleish used to do some kind of ridiculous armwringer-springboard-floating-twisting DDT spot.

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