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TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Alaois posted:

shawn michaels is like 5' 10"

Oh nononono

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TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Drew McIntyre posted:

Enzo Amore was technically a wrestler

*Sports Entertainer

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Wrestling loves the mirror gimmick. Remember when they did it with Fake Kane?

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Gavok posted:

I recall WWECW having a bit where Zack Ryder saw Rosa Mendes for the first time backstage, then we got to see him fantasizing about them being a couple.

Also, there was that major WTF segment about Mark Henry, JBL and El Torito that I'm not going to begin to describe.

I just remembered they did another mirror thing with the Wyatt family at some points. I think they even did one with Daniel Bryan and Kane.

Then of course the time Adam Rose did a bit with the mirror from Oculus.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Nehru the Damaja posted:

Where the hell has Aleister Black been

like I haven't been watching WWE for months but generally I at least get what's going on from twitter people and gif accounts and stuff

Did he piss someone off?

He sits in a dark room and gets mad about people knocking on his door. He had a squash simulated combat on Raw last Monday and I think is supposed to sports entertain against Buddy Murphy at TLC.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

El Gallinero Gros posted:

Don Callis had a promotion that ran Winnipeg and Thunder Bay (where I live). He had:

Krizstof Szozynski (who competed on TUF)

Well I'll be damned. I had no idea that guy did pro wrestling AND he learned holds and junk from Bad News Brown. That's crazy.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

jesus WEP posted:

My brain is short circuiting trying to picture either Hogan successfully executing a powerbomb, or Hogan successfully taking a rana

The only bombs Hogan executed were in the box office. Zing!

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

TNA had a little person named "Puppet The Midget Killer" masturbating in a trash can and threatening to rape a female interviewer. It's not a good comparison.

I didn't know Rob Zombie booked TNA.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Bad Wolf posted:

Oooh, that reminds me, second dumbest elimination is Finlay, being disqualified for using a foreign object, which has never happened before or since.

My mind instantly jumps to Raven pushing a shopping cart of bullshit down to the ring in Royal Rumble 2001

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

I just remembered Apollo works for WWE. What a sad waste.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

super macho dude posted:

Serious question: What are the qualities that Okada possesses that make him one of the biggest and best performers in wrestling today? Like, if you were going to roll him up as a DnD character, what would his perks and skills be?

I'm no Okada expert, but when I watch him I just look and think, "This guy is a drat STAR." He's got an aura that tells you he's important and the poo poo he's about to do is important. The closest thing I can think in this moment is a Paladin's auras or the Discipline of Presence from Vampire the Masquerade.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Vince obviously only hired Alberto because he was tall.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Dell_Zincht posted:

He's not. He's largely seen in the industry as a lying, backstabbing, thieving piece of poo poo by wrestlers and promoters alike.

As posted above though, he was THE referee in WWF/WWE, back when referees actually had names and were often part of storylines.

He even had actual matches with Nick Patrick during the Invasion. poo poo was shameful.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Nehru the Damaja posted:

It still blows my mind that WWE saw some broke-rear end TV show make Alberto white-hot and they didn't follow in that path. MexAmerica was just throwing money into a loving incinerator.

Milking the American public for dumb patriotism is a classic WWE move.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Hedgehog Pie posted:

I'm still a bit unclear about his Seven character in WCW due to reading so much conflicting information about it. Was it intended as a legit spooky character along the lines of, say, Bray Wyatt until Turner S&P got involved? Was it always going to end with a worked shoot, or was this something added in by the recently arrived Vince Russo (he might not have even got there yet, I'm confused with my timelines)? Were the promos really supposed to imply that he was a child molester of sorts?

Either way it was bad.

And they put so much effort into the debut. With him floating to the ring and all the fire and then... oh... welp never mind.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

extradite THIS! posted:

Blampied repeatedly slid into the DMs of several women asking for nudes and generally being a creep. He then apologized and voluntarily disappeared for a few years. I guess he feels like he’s been in his self-imposed internet jail for long enough now :shrug:

He is a naturally charming guy with a knack for telling stories, be it summarizing someone’s career or fantasy booking an angle. So make of this all what you will, I’m sure you’ll come across him and his work if you follow even a couple of wrestling youtubers

Oh poo poo I had no idea I'd seen this guy until I googled him and at the time I thought he gave some serious creep vibes. Yiiiikes.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

Any excuse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aj1ScIBpUq0

Also it's important to note that Meanie was being 'punished' for breaking a dumbass rule that he didn't know existed with a plane ticket that was purchased for him by the company. He had been busted open hardway by accident a few nights before and JBL specifically targeted the staples Meanie still had in the back of his head. JBL got socked multiple times in retaliation by a team of Sandman and Tracy Smothers of all people. Tracy didn't even know what had happened he just wanted to beat JBL for being a dickhead.

I hate all the flashes at the moment of impact. I wanna be able to slow everything down and watch his spine compress like the Zapruder film.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

fatherofmustard posted:

What's the most overbooked match ever?

Mankind winning the title on Raw has to be up there.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Admiral Joeslop posted:

That's probably the one I was thinking of. DX, Austin, maybe Rikishi, all running in, probably more. If I remember right, the crowd was basically screaming the entire time and somehow popped even bigger when that glass break hit.

Yeah I wanna say The Corporation was involved? I don't think they were called that at the time of course.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Halloween Jack posted:

At its worst, matches were being won by people who weren't in the match or according to the wrong stipulations.

For all timers, though, it's hard to beat the Doomsday Cage Match in 96. An expensive match gimmick, huge amount of star power, all made to look like crap. The audience doesn't know what's going on, and then the Booty Man shows up with weapons.

Aw poo poo this is the one where Macho and Hogan are tapping dudes on the head with frying pans. What a trash match.

edit: The whole match is so ridiculous and gross. The Final Ultimate Solution, the attempt to bury Pillman, ripping the crowd off with such a bad view of the match.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Visual Basic Bitch posted:

Was Sting/HHH the match where kevin nash ran in and (kayfabe) blew his quads? Because that was hilarious and cool.

Yes and I think he tweeted a joke about it after.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Vandar posted:

And then they had segments on Raw where Leslie Nielsen was looking in grocery stores and delis trying to find the Undertaker!

Which led us to the incredible FAKE UNDERTAKER story.

Man, wrestling is amazing. :allears:

Yo, I saw the Undertaker order three dozen coffin shaped donuts.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Ganso Bomb posted:

Now I want a Steiner Brothers reality show where they go around the south fixing up failing Shoney's.

I want Rick Steiner to be in the next Child's Play movie.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

El Gallinero Gros posted:

I'm going to need to know more about this dinner party

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Randaconda posted:

Was the Patriot's real name a secret? I feel like I remember always knowing his name was Del WIlkes.

I could swear I remember commentary calling him The Patriot and Del Wilkes.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

I still remember the crowd chanting "You suck dick!" at Angle and his response being, "Your mother taught me how!"

Which honestly just raises even more questions.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

In a roundabout way Flair getting hammered and going way off script cost JR his job.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Admiral Joeslop posted:

Crowe: WHAT

Undertaker: Say what if you sleep with your sister.

Crowe: WHA-BOOOOO

Was also a good one and a highlight in Taker's otherwise boring and plodding promos.

What was the Dusty and Stephanie thing? Were they doing a promo for some reason?

Dusty was going back and forth with HHH and they had a stare down. Stephanie put her face between theirs on the hard camera to leech the heat and Dusty did a talk to the hand on her.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Schneider Heim posted:

I read Bret's take that he begged Goldberg backstage not to hit him really hard, and he did anyway, but that's one side of the story.

I'm inclined to believe the guy that tried to kill people with his spear every time probably went a little stiff.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Pope Corky the IX posted:

I honestly have no idea, that’s why I’m asking.

I also know they asked about Ultimate Warrior and demanded proof that he’s dead.

*Vince sighs and has Warriors bone saw dismembered corpse brought in*

"Just how ya like 'em, pal!"

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Halloween Jack posted:

I always liked Goldust.

Same, I was too young and naive to understand the negative parts of the character and thought he owned for using homophobia against people.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

SG Bamboo posted:

I'm going to go with Journey into Darkness' continuity and say that the Brothers of Destruction are Glen (portrayed by Glenn Jacobs) and Mark Callaway (portrayed by Mark Calaway). See, it's the subtle differences in spelling that make all the difference to maintaining kayfabe

Love a dose of that hot JiD

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Low Desert Punk posted:

all Shawn Michaels matches are overrated

Not an empty quote

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Breitbart Is Rightbart posted:

What have been some decent face turns? Like Batista in 05 was really natural and cool. And what have been some garbage ones?

Daniel Bryan turning back face on the Wyatt Family was great even if the heel turn it reversed was insanely stupid.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Dejan Bimble posted:

What sort of 70s/80s steroids would a guy need to get a Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorf physique?

Basically all the stuff listed in the steroid trial depositions and court documents.

Oh and also good genetics because Mr Wonderful looked amazing and not just anyone can do that.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Would you say you can’t teach that?

*starts sweating*

I dunno what you're talking about, bro.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

They'd still make him wear Goldust's wig.

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Admiral Joeslop posted:

Speaking of WWE Champion Khali; who would you consider the worst pushed champions of WWE/WCW? Not angles like David Arquette or Vince Russo winning but people they actually put the title on to be The Champion.

Criteria can be pretty much anything as long as the wrestler was seriously pushed.

Edit: Second question! Did Sting do any wrestling at all during that year or however long before he wrestled Hogan? House shows, dark matches, anything?

^Yeah what that guy said.

Jinder. They wanted that guy to be a star in India but still booked him as a chickenshit heel. Like... what?

TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

Something that really stands out to me about WWE and it being garbage is all the wrestlers feel so drat phony. Yes, wrestling is fake, but the WWE talent doesn't feel like they have any kind of swagger or badass attitude. I don't get the impression even they believe in what they're doing.

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TheKingslayer
Sep 3, 2008

I hate Jeff Jarrett with a passion but even I can't help but love the absurdity of calling people slapnuts. It's not cool or a sick burn, it's just so loving stupid it wraps around to hilarious.

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