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It is said that if you give ten monkeys ten typewriters, eventually they will write a decent episode of WWE Raw. I decided to put that to the test. Here is what the monkeys came up with: #1. I'm a little embarrassed to say, but I had to give it to the monkeys, at least in terms of content. "A very long letter to WWE." #2. "Hey, it's John Cena" is probably the worst line the monkeys could come up with. If they want to complain about John Cena being too loud, why not say "hey, it's John Cena and he is loud and you know he is?" #3. "I'm not going to say a word here and you can go back to being angry with me." If only the monkeys could come up with a better "I'm not going to say a word" line. I like how the monkeys are saying "you are going to be angry" and "I
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# ? Nov 18, 2019 18:32 |
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# ? Apr 19, 2024 22:09 |
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quote:"HONOR-LESS CUR" shouted The Miz.
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# ? Nov 18, 2019 20:15 |
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quote:"CHRISTOPHER" shouted grandma, "THAT'S AGAINST THE LAW!". Chris Jericho whimpered.
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# ? Nov 19, 2019 19:08 |
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We head backstage to the WWE boiler room, where Jaysen Kruger (formerly Darby Allin) is apparently masturbating. Rey Mysterio Jr. is in the same locker room and is doing the same. After a few minutes, he goes out to get a beer from the cooler. The show gets a bit more bizarre and creepy as the crowd starts chanting "BAD MOB" at the top of its lungs. We head to the back of the arena to a room where the match between Rey and Rey Mysterio Jr. is being taped. It's pretty weird that this segment is being taped in this room. Rey gets out to face Rey Mysterio Jr. The two lock up but then Rey Mysterio Jr. kicks out at one point. Rey Mysterio Jr. then kicks Rey back to the floor. Rey's head hits the top of the stairs but Rey is able
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# ? Nov 19, 2019 19:24 |
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quote:Luchasaurus passed the jam across the table before going through it himself, and said it was a great idea.
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# ? Nov 19, 2019 19:26 |
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quote:Scott Steiner started, he was team look at these bombs, then he flexed. Then Chris Somethingorother said "Osama Bin Fuckin Ladin took down those towers not Saddam Hussein this poo poo is for oil brother" and Scott Steiner high fived him and he said "gently caress no" then he took it back. Then another one of the team said "Bin Ladin is the real one. He is the one that killed the Kennedys" and then he took a step back, and then he got down on all fours and his eyes got real big and he looked like he was about to puke. He was just really angry at that point. Then they all started going crazy. Scott Steiner said "I am not gonna be the one to tell you guys what to do, and I am not gonna try and make it seem like I'm going to make a decision
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# ? Nov 19, 2019 20:48 |
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quote:Gene Okerlund stood frozen in terror as Randy Savage pulled creamer after creamer out of thin air: first from Gene’s pockets, then his shirt, then his ears, then ???? from his mouth, then he opened his mouth, the "creamer" exploded in an ethereal cloud, and Gene’s body was enveloped by the cloud and disappeared. The crowd went absolutely nuts. It was a weird moment in a weird week. quote:Gene Okerlund stood frozen in terror as Randy Savage pulled creamer after creamer out of thin air: first from Gene’s pockets, then his shirt, then his ears, then iced tea in his hair, then the ice and water he had been holding. Then, to Gene’s horror, Savage reached down and started to pour his entire cup of coffee over his ear. quote:Gene Okerlund stood frozen in terror as Randy Savage pulled creamer after creamer out of thin air: first from Gene’s pockets, then his shirt, then his ears, then ersatz organs from a nearby trash can. He knew that Savage could only have been seeing it all. And yet, in that instant, the world was saved. A few of the people in the crowd were horrified; others went nuts with glee, hugging and slapping Savage and then running at him and hugging him again, until at last Savage began laughing, then sobbing, then sobbing some more, before he was finally ushered to a waiting ambulance. Gene was inconsolable. "I have to apologize," Gene said to the assembled reporters. "I just couldn't stand there and do nothing." quote:Gene Okerlund stood frozen in terror as Randy Savage pulled creamer after creamer out of thin air: first from Gene’s pockets, then his shirt, then his ears, then Ă¢â'¬Ă"¢ his eyes. Then, an experiment: quote:Gene Okerlund
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# ? Nov 19, 2019 21:39 |
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quote:WWE's Undertaker didn't know it, but his brother Kane had a convoluted plan spanning decades to destroy him forever. First, he had a massive heart attack. Then, in a last-ditch attempt to kill his brother, Kane tried to murder his own family, all in an effort to force his brother to become a true monster. That's how much his brother hated him. But this was still his brother, right? I like how the randomized plan is actually what Kane did and then out of loving nowhere the Rock's stomach becomes a snake
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# ? Nov 20, 2019 02:57 |
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quote:Once known as Chad Gable, a convoluted storyline involving Baron Corbin forced him to change his name to Shorty G. Today, though, Chad Gable announced his newest name: the "King of the Cocks," for his love of all things cock.
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# ? Nov 20, 2019 03:22 |
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quote:Triple H was wearing Kane's mask and having sex with a mannequin. When he was finished, Triple H said "This is why I don't talk about my dick anymore." This was then followed by a shot of Kane's face with his hair in a knot with a mannequin underneath. Then Triple H said "He was a man, so of course he'd want to get a piece of it" and cut the mask off of Kane's head. Triple H then said "I'm not done with this, but I won't lie, I was a little turned on watching Kane get his revenge on me." Then Kane cut a shot of his cock. Triple H came back into the ring and said "You like my cock, don't you? I bet you do. I bet you like getting hosed by a man, don't you? You like getting your rear end hosed by a man, don quote:Rob Van Dam's new theme song goes:
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# ? Nov 20, 2019 03:44 |
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quote:for like a month HHH would say “Dave when I hit the pedigree we know it’s over. The pedigree Dave Dave the pedigree the pedigree” and then Batista kicked out. So then it was the same old. The first match that I had ever wrestled, it wasn't me. It wasn't me and the guy. It was me and some kid and he was like 10. And then, I started losing. And then it was the other night. It was like it's been a month and I'm just tired. And the thing I was like, I really want to wrestle that kid again but he's too bad. I was like, I'm just tired. And I just don't want to put him in that position again. It's bad. I don't want to do that again. So that's what made me want to stop. That's the thing. So that's when I got hurt. I didn't think I was that hurt.
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# ? Nov 20, 2019 09:19 |
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quote:Adolf Hitler escaped Germany, and became a famous luchador in Mexico and Brazil. He then returned to Germany in 1931 and began working at the Munich Zoo. He was later hired by the German government as a zookeeper, and in 1934 he was given command of the zoo in Berlin. He worked there from 1936 to 1945. quote:Seth Rollins challenged CM Punk to a match, but instead, CM Punk challenged John Cena to a match for the WWE Championship, to be held at SummerSlam, and Rollins challenged Cena to the rematch. Cena accepted and the match was set. Shayna Baszler fucked around with this message at 09:42 on Nov 20, 2019 |
# ? Nov 20, 2019 09:36 |
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The ring was burning, but Kane was the one putting it out. He had made the move that night and would make more on it. He was now the man, the legend, the face of the WWE and one of the most feared men in the world. WWE With his face on the line, he went back and got the help he needed. He took it and it was all over. A month later, Kane won the world title at Hell in a Cell. Kane had won. That was it for Kane. A man who was born and raised in the WWE, who had won all the major titles of the company, had lived through some of the most brutal matches of all time. His body was gone but his spirit was forever. The only problem was, he was dead. The legend had risen from the dead, and he would have it for a lifetime. This is the first part of a two-part episode
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# ? Nov 20, 2019 15:41 |
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quote:you're back in college, and you're taking the final exam in a cultural anthropology class, and CM Punk is your professor, and you just realized you aren't wearing pants because CM Punk wore them to the exam and you realized, hey, that CM Punk has this cool kid-look in his wrestling days but now he looks like a less chic and cool guy but he's still cool, he's still fun, and he's still still doing cool stuff, so, you know, go with it, man, and you tell everyone you're in for the finals, go and throw a downpour on him, and the sports psychologist sees and feels and hears and everything, so I recommend that you also wear a cool-looking sweater or hoodie and breathe heavily and go out there and try to throw your voice across the microphone because the guy's class is 90 minutes long, and you think that maybe the instructor is making fun of
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# ? Nov 21, 2019 09:01 |
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As Sonny Kiss worked it for Billy Gunn during the Battle Royal, Orange Cassidy lowered his sunglasses in appreciation as Billy won it. The crowd chanted "Set! Set! Set! Kiss!". Billy grinned and faced the heavens. The next night, he attempted to make good on that moment and got it again by replacing Bobby with a more appropriate villain. After leaving his knuckles in a ready position, the tree appeared to have been touched by a million cars. When The Giant had already taken a victory lap around the ring, set up his backdrops and set his bats, Liam interrupted and said that the standard of the show had changed and he and others felt uncomfortable. His words were interrupted by the Giant, who said it was completely different than what it had been two years before. There would no longer be a storyline, gimmick or his fear and anger, because there was a new "Joey Sags" now --- Kinda nuts that Cody got the trademark for The Nasty BoysTM
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# ? Nov 21, 2019 09:16 |
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quote:Completely out of options, Vince commands his own roster change their names to try and fool the fans into thinking they are watching AEW. Roman Reigns becomes Chris Jerkicho, Kevin Owens becomes Darby Allout, The Miz becomes hang-ten adam page, Neville becomes The Yeti, Sasha Banks becomes 8-Ball and Baby Doll, Chad Gable becomes the Silence of the Lambs, R-Truth becomes the young hunter, Shinsuke Nakamura becomes the Torture Chamber, and other rosters shake and adjust at the smallest of
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 08:21 |
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The following team will represent NXT during Survivor Series: Keith Lee Triple H Bray Wyatt Curtis Axel Erick Rowan Dolph Ziggler John Cena Vince McMahon Chyna AJ Lee Bray Wyatt Big E Langston Neville Cesaro Chris Jericho The Miz Isaac Yankem Dolph Ziggler Chris Jericho Trish Stratus Jay Briscoe Kane
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 14:46 |
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WWE has had to pull out all the stops to beat AEW in the ratings war, and their latest stunt is just as bizarre as it is painfully stupid. As noted last week, the show recently debuted a new intro starring Dwayne Johnson. In it, WWE stars Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston are shown playing in a toy store. In one scene, Ziggler is called a "sick little brat" and Big E calls him "another hot little fukin' ole boy." Aww.
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 14:54 |
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I'm impressed by Transformer nailing Creep E's style
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 15:30 |
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The Big Boss Man invited Al Snow over to dinner. After Al Snow started to take a few bites, The Boss Man revealed that the dish was made up of iced watermelon and yellow pepper. After Al Snow confirmed this, The Boss Man said he had a few things to tell him. Al Snow was scared and hurriedly left the kitchen. The Boss Man then came out of his house and told him that he had a target on his back and that one day he would kill him. Al Snow requested the Boss Man to spare him and spared him, but The Boss Man drew his
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 16:48 |
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quote:'No vince you can't do this! Think of the calories!'
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 19:08 |
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quote:Matt Hardy: “Brother Neeeeeroooooo! 〜Яьное! quote:Matt Hardy: “Brother Neeeeeroooooo! ʇŴᴀᴄᴀɪɴɢsᴛᴏɪᴛʜ! ʜᴀʟʟᴀs ʏᴏʟʟᴀʏs ᴀᴜɪᴇɴɢs ɪᴏ ᴏʀs ʟᴏʟʟᴀ quote:Matt Hardy: “Brother Neeeeeroooooo! 𝘀𝘀𝘁𝘁𝘁𝘂! 𝘀𝘀𝘀𝘀𝘁𝘁𝘂✅!! *Niiiiiiiiiinds 𝘀𝘀𝘁𝘁𝘁𝘂✅!!* quote:Matt Hardy: “Brother Neeeeeroooooo! 今天 竹晚 是 I can't even! We'll just need to... plz no... Da taichi god give me Da spirits of the gods!!! ...please! I am indeed Da father of one of them!!! A bonafide sushi master that can recreate the original food! If you give me gaijin men, I'll serve them! These gaijin men are my children. Let them serve me. I will never give you up! Da power of the gods Pollyanna fucked around with this message at 22:37 on Nov 22, 2019 |
# ? Nov 22, 2019 22:27 |
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Ahmed Johnson: If you think you can STEP UP TO PUNCHY and face the might of the SAND RIPPER, then you are delusional. The sand ripners can KO the sh*t out of me, a little WV2 all over my front, cause I can start with WV1. If you don't see what I'm talking about then you don't know sh*t. I can drop a SAMPA shot up to KINCHOUSE then look at someone, sprint up the hill at full sprint and just SHOOT them in the back of
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# ? Nov 22, 2019 22:34 |
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quote:The Undisputed Era all turned to see who would be making their entrance as the fourth member of Ciampa's team. Then the music hit, and out came former WWE Raw member Jey Uso, brand new and already voted to be on the Showcase of the Immortals. quote:The Undisputed Era all turned to see who would be making their entrance as the fourth member of Ciampa's team. Then the music hit, and out came former WWE Raw member Enzo Amore in full Kimora Lee skins to a simple dance routine. quote:The Undisputed Era all turned to see who would be making their entrance as the fourth member of Ciampa's team. Then the music hit, and out came former WWE Raw member AJ Styles, who had won a highly controversial Tables Match in the main event of this year's WrestleMania 33.
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# ? Nov 24, 2019 22:47 |
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"That's the Butcher, the Butcher and the Blade!" shouted Excalibur as the two wrestlers emerged from the ring. Jim Ross was still none the wiser. WHO were The Butcher and the Blade? Had he forgotten? Was that horrible day finally here? Jim Ross – realizing they were The Butcher and the Blade and that time was up – was gracious enough to turn back the clock as Kevin Sullivan leaned over and showed Jim Ross an image of The Butcher and The Blade. Sullivan reached down and pat Sullivan on the back in the way a dog might pat a cat. --- Stands to reason
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# ? Nov 29, 2019 05:53 |
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Didn't Cena drink some mamajuana juice on a PPV during a backstage skit because he was worried he wouldn't have the stamina to have sex with Eva Marie? I don't believe it. Eva Marie isn't going to have sexual intercourse with Cena, she is going to sit on his face like a huge horn dog. Advertisement Oh wow. You know where this is going, don't you? "Eva Marie is going to sit on his face like a huge horn dog" "Would you like some mamajuana
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# ? Nov 29, 2019 08:20 |
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That was a hosed up episode of The Boys.
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# ? Nov 29, 2019 12:46 |
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Asuka sprayed the green mist at Charlotte once again. This time, the temperature of the mist surrounding her disappeared. A scene filled with colors was to be seen: crimson, yellow, pink, purple, blue, and white all combined to form an almost always vibrant color. And she had the only smile on her face. The last: It wasn't a "goodbye" smile. It was a "I love you" smile. A man and a woman stood next to each other, perhaps jogging, laughing, and conversing. They were complete strangers.
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# ? Nov 29, 2019 13:54 |
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quote:Hulk Hogan was about to throw down with a literal garbage incinerator, but he and Hulkster take to the ring to figure out how they're gonna beat the Hulkster. Their journey ends in a huge fight and Hulkster is standing on top of the incinerator after tossing a water balloon in the face of a garbage incinerator.
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# ? Nov 29, 2019 20:47 |
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the butcher and the blade and the bunny and the mouse and the doll and the princess and the jerry-rigged television and the rotund gentleman who wins an auto-immune disease lottery after getting bitten by a radioactive spider
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# ? Nov 29, 2019 22:51 |
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Wyatt dragged Bryan into the hole in the ring and pulled out Bryan's dick. At first, Wyatt was the only one to notice. "I didn't mean to do it to you," Wyatt whispered to Bryan in the heart of the cage as Bryan stared up in the rafters, almost comically blank and stony-faced. "Don't be like that. I'm sorry," Bryan whispered back, backing up as if facing his date for the first time. "Your rear end belongs to me now," Wyatt whispered. The ring became pitch black,
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# ? Nov 30, 2019 06:27 |
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quote:wwe: what do you want
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# ? Nov 30, 2019 23:08 |
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quote:an indie wrestling veteran, The Kentucky Gentleman Chuck Taylor loving rules because he's the only one I can trust to ignore the words of three of his fellow wrestlers who would like to see him dead. A flashy European wrestler-turned-headliner for the Chinese style of match-fixing (read: magic) called bingo-a-rama, Taylor made his debut in February of 2002 and the world, and his competitors, were surprised. Inspired by their flashy antics, a new group of competitors have formed. Standing at 5'7", Taylor lives up to his moniker by having the quote:a New Japan Pro Wrestling wrestler, The Stone Pitbull Tomohiro Ishii loving rules because he has a deal with F4W. It's not like you could tell when they were joking at night and they are doing anything serious. We have to come in during the day to find it or it's worthless. Being in college, I'm always on the lookout for, maybe someone there that has a stock and can do something like that. In the other notes I'm going to keep track of those guys that I'm still in the dark about, but if I ever quote:a wrestler working for some bad company, Bryan Danielson loving rules because he can gently caress his way through badcalls and continue his PPV title run. This is the most prestigious heavyweight championship the WWE has. Hell, WrestleMania is such a celebration of itself that they allow it to be owned by the largest number of middle-of-the-pack talent. Daniel Bryan is the guy that decides who the "Mr. WrestleMania" is. quote:a modern day folk hero, Nick loving Gage loving rules because of his conquests, victories and domination. Although he's humble about his achievements, Nick doesn't take any poo poo, winning and then forcing each opponent to fight him to a dead heat, and then loving winning so much that no one will ever dare to beat him again. Here's the video that sums him up in a nutshell - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSLnGp98P88
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# ? Nov 30, 2019 23:27 |
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quote:Jon Moxley calls his squire "Shooter" because the land he lives on has four rivers running through it. "Yes, the two of them make a nice deal," he said, because the squire can keep one as a place to pitch a tent, but shooting means he can dump it, grab a bag, and continue hiking. quote:Jon Moxley calls his squire "Shooter" because of his stealth abilities. All round, he has some of the best survival and self-preservation skills in the game. He can kill an unarmed enemy with his axe, or any enemy you do not see if he gets close enough. Take him out of combat with your sword, but use your staff to take him out of combat with his stealth ability (which is not designed to be counteracted by sword). You can never run out of ammo in Fallout 2. The only reason to use a bow is for ranged weapons
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# ? Dec 1, 2019 01:13 |
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quote:Times had gotten tough but Finn Balor still owned and operated a hover craft. I only posted this one because Joe Jitsu is my new pro wrestling gimmick
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# ? Dec 1, 2019 03:20 |
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quote:During the match, Mr. Wrestling III interfered and badly injured Mr. T. The match was restarted with Mr. T trapped in a steel cage, and Mr. Wrestling III and Mr. T took turns executing the impaling on a spike piledriver (the chicken wing's greatest enemy) on the unsuspecting Mr. Irikematsu. quote:Scheduled for WCW Uncensored 1995, the King of the Road match took place on a now-defunct Raw from June 8th to the 11th. quote:Hulk Hogan: Slaughter's reign is going to be a temporary one like Sudan Hussein's reign over in Kuwait, brother. quote:Hulk Hogan: Slaughter's reign is going to be a temporary one like Sudan Hussein's reign over in Kuwait, brother.
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# ? Dec 3, 2019 18:05 |
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I.. I'm sorry fellows. I wanted to take us all the way to wrestlehut 2000 which was going to be a surprise appearance by our very own secret forums wrestler and mayor of Knox county Kane but that is in major jeopardy now!
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# ? Dec 5, 2019 04:48 |
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quote:A member from the audience said they wanted to join Brandi Rhodes and Awesome Kong's Nightmare Coalition. They entered the ring and then Brandi and Kong iced them with a Batista/D-Generation X heel turn. At this time, The Legion of Doom (Jax, Jason, Lita, and Perry Saturn) were causing a bit of a stir on the broadcast booth. They were members of the Covenant of Doom. They ran through the 2-minute match and Beast Boy and Stu revealed the true identity of the Menace. They beat them down and they were finally joined quote:A member from the audience said they wanted to join Brandi Rhodes and Awesome Kong's Nightmare Coalition. They entered the ring and then Brandi and Kong began to chant "Hold them, Baby! Hold them, Baby!" which the crowd did as they hit the rope for a buttslam. Awesome Kong and Little Kong were then attacked and the two officials were then taken out of the ring, and immediately afterwards Brandi and Kong attacked them.
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# ? Dec 5, 2019 05:02 |
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The Butcher and the Blade and the Bunny The Dark Order The Nightmare Collective The Shambling Empath The Spider's Landing The Final Rage The Asphodel Orcs The Jack of Blades The Death of Akrisae The Not Yet Book The Perfect Church (Dark Maelstrom) The Shrine of Infinity The Underrise
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# ? Dec 5, 2019 05:29 |
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# ? Apr 19, 2024 22:09 |
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quote:The card for WWE TLC: Tables, Ladder, and Chairs is as follows (card subject to change):
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# ? Dec 6, 2019 06:15 |