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BlankSystemDaemon
Mar 13, 2009

System Access Node Not Found



Both England and France still have major hang-ups over their loss of empires, and you'll even find some Danes who think that somehow the Vikings had it all figured out, despite the fact that it was almost a thousand years ago and they thought having slaves were a pretty neat idea (to the shame of most modern-day Danes).
Empire is a bad thing in general.

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Cessna
Feb 20, 2013

KHABAHBLOOOM

Bucnasti posted:

Do modern audiences have any idea what the French Foreign Legion is?
There used to be lots of movies about Legionaries, and it would pop up in cartoons and commercials, but I can't think of any mainstream references to it in decades.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2mEJ4RpeuI

They're still a legit thing you may run into if you're in the military and deployed. The FFL shows up in a lot of wars.

Bucnasti
Aug 14, 2012

Listen to him, men. He's just crazy enough to do it!


I know that the modern FFL still exists and is a thing, but from what I understand they're not all that different from other modern fmilitary forces. What I'm talking about is the Beau Guestes style of legionaires chilling in the sandy desert and wearing funny white hats with flaps on the back.

When I was a kid that was a more recognizable trope then things like ninjas and samurai, but I haven't seen them portrayed in mainstream media since Brendan Fraisers first Mummy movie.

silence_kit
Jul 14, 2011



Iím very impressed with Franceís mighty empire

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat



Grimey Drawer

France still has territories, but itís not killing people over them like it did in Algeria and Southeast Asia. Some I guess are considered part of France like French Guiana, so France shares a borders Brazil. I donít know about their other colonial era possessions.

The point being theyíre not sending the FFL into these regions to kill native people in the name of libertť, egalitť, and fraternitť. Well, not as often anyway.

OctaviusBeaver
Apr 30, 2009

Say what now?

There was a Foreign Legion guy here who did an Ask/Tell thread a number of years ago, I can't find it now though.

Elissimpark
May 20, 2010

The best ideas come out of stupidity.

Oh sure, everyone remembers the FRENCH Foreign Legion, but no-one ever remembers the SPANISH Foreign Legion.

Does the French one march twice as fast as the rest of their armies? Do they have a goat in a little hat as a mascot?

No, I didn't think so.

AKA Pseudonym
May 16, 2004

A dashing and sophisticated young man

Doctor Rope

I don't think the Foreign Legion was referenced in popular culture because it was particular topical, I think it was a recognizable trope that just slid out of common use.

Just about every reference I've ever seen was comical come to think of it, so it wasn't like it was something that was touching any serious nerves.

My Lovely Horse
Aug 21, 2010




Elissimpark posted:

Oh sure, everyone remembers the FRENCH Foreign Legion, but no-one ever remembers the SPANISH Foreign Legion.
Or expects.

Arsenic Lupin
Apr 11, 2012

This particularly rapid unintelligible patter isn't generally heard, and if it is, it doesn't matter.





Bucnasti posted:

When I was a kid that was a more recognizable trope then things like ninjas and samurai, but I haven't seen them portrayed in mainstream media since Brendan Fraisers first Mummy movie.
Maybe Gene Wilder was right when he did The Last Remake of Beau Geste. Seriously that plot hinges on the 'heroine' being a manipulative jerk, and the hero's protecting her from being prosecuted for her crime by nobly destroying his own life. Plus colonialism.

In 1966, Neil Simon, Cy Coleman, Dorothy Fields, and Bob Fosse decided to make a musical based on a Fellini movie, Nights of Cabiria, about a happy-go-lucky and downtrodden prostitute. However, a musical about a prostitute was a bridge too far, so the heroine, Charity Hope Valentine, is a taxi dancer.

A what? You may ask. Well, back in the Barbary Coast days, when women were scarce, a bright soul had the idea of opening a dance hall where men bought drinks in order to dance with women. San Francisco passed a law forbidding alcohol from being sold at dance halls, so the dance halls rebranded to selling tickets to dance with women. The women were called "taxi dancers" because it was seen as like paying for a taxi. This spread across the country (ironically, San Francisco banned taxi dancing in 1921). Taxi dancers weren't sex workers, but they weren't not sex workers, either. Men (always men; women weren't admitted unless they were employees) paid to practice dancing, to have a friendly face to talk to, to rub off against, to make a date for later, all depending on the hall and the person. The Wikipedia writeup is great. Because taxi-dancing might be, but wasn't necessarily, deniable sex work, you could write titillating songs and movies about it; see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXcIEKyiAno "Ten Cents a Dance", as a song and a movie, and many others. In the dance hall, dancers stood behind a rope or a bar, enticing men to come and dance with them.

Now you know the basis behind "Hey, Big Spender". Ironically, taxi dance halls were pretty much dead by the time Sweet Charity premiered. Few people now living remember them, except as they showed up in songs and movies.

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat



Grimey Drawer

We had something like that here when the county revoked liquor licenses from our local strip clubs. One became an 18+ nude juice bar and the other still sold booze, but let you dance/touch clothed ladies. If that sounds creepy, well it was and closed for good a week later after all the women quit.

The other place lasted for years. Itís now a sushi bar which writes its own jokes.

toplitzin
Jun 13, 2003


AKA Pseudonym posted:

I don't think the Foreign Legion was referenced in popular culture because it was particular topical, I think it was a recognizable trope that just slid out of common use.

Just about every reference I've ever seen was comical come to think of it, so it wasn't like it was something that was touching any serious nerves.

I think that there was at least one JCVD movie that started off with him in the FFL for one reason or another.

Tears In A Vial
Jan 13, 2008



toplitzin posted:

I think that there was at least one JCVD movie that started off with him in the FFL for one reason or another.

Legionnaire and Lionheart both feature jcvd in the French foreign legion

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007



I think France still has a law that if you get wounded in action in the FFL you automatically become a french citizen.

Elissimpark
May 20, 2010

The best ideas come out of stupidity.


Dammit.

Imagined
Feb 2, 2007


The Lone Badger posted:

I think France still has a law that if you get wounded in action in the FFL you automatically become a french citizen.

Do you mean serving in the French Foreign Legion and not becoming a citizen is a possibility? Or even, likely? Why the gently caress would anyone do it then?

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!



Usually to disappear.

Fish of hemp
Apr 1, 2011


Some people like war.

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

Delicious and Informative!


Imagined posted:

Do you mean serving in the French Foreign Legion and not becoming a citizen is a possibility? Or even, likely? Why the gently caress would anyone do it then?
I think the point is that getting wounded gets you there immediately, instead of having to serve one or two decades or however long it is.

DACK FAYDEN
Feb 25, 2013

Bear Witness

A Buttery Pastry posted:

I think the point is that getting wounded gets you there immediately, instead of having to serve one or two decades or however long it is.
having looked this up on wikipedia yesterday when this discussion started, it's three years or you can be "French by spilled blood" instantly

A Buttery Pastry
Sep 4, 2011

Delicious and Informative!


DACK FAYDEN posted:

having looked this up on wikipedia yesterday when this discussion started, it's three years or you can be "French by spilled blood" instantly
I might have confused it with the Roman system. Three years doesnít sound that bad, ignoring that itís supposedly not the most pleasant experience.

Bucnasti
Aug 14, 2012

Listen to him, men. He's just crazy enough to do it!


From what I read serving a full term (or getting wounded while serving) automatically makes you eligible to apply for French citizenship, but doesn't automatically make you a citizen. I don't know what the normal criteria are for application but I'm guessing they're stringent or nobody would join the legion.

Ugly In The Morning
Jul 1, 2010

So pat yourself on the back and give yourself a handshake
'Cause everything is not yet lost




Pillbug

Bucnasti posted:

From what I read serving a full term (or getting wounded while serving) automatically makes you eligible to apply for French citizenship, but doesn't automatically make you a citizen. I don't know what the normal criteria are for application but I'm guessing they're stringent or nobody would join the legion.

I did see that citizenship is almost always granted, and you apparently have to be a tremendous fuckup to not get it.

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!



The stereotype or trope is that the Foreign Legion is made up entirely of fuckups and fugitives.

I'm not sure how much truth there is to that but when you see it in old media it's often used to show just how desperate a character is to get away from their situation.

Imagined
Feb 2, 2007


Yeah I've always heard it portrayed it as a sort of permanent, division sized 'Dirty Dozen'.

Imagined fucked around with this message at 23:15 on May 5, 2021

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007



Imagined posted:

Do you mean serving in the French Foreign Legion and not becoming a citizen is a possibility? Or even, likely? Why the gently caress would anyone do it then?

Until 1997 ghurkas were not given british residence even after serving a full career.

Bucnasti
Aug 14, 2012

Listen to him, men. He's just crazy enough to do it!


FreudianSlippers posted:

The stereotype or trope is that the Foreign Legion is made up entirely of fuckups and fugitives.

I'm not sure how much truth there is to that but when you see it in old media it's often used to show just how desperate a character is to get away from their situation.

I don't know if this part is true, but I heard you could sign up under an assumed name and that finishing your service and becoming a citizen basically gave you a new identity.

Carillon
May 9, 2014





I vaguely remember reading that used to be true, but it's a lot harder to do these days. You can't just show up with serious warrants and have that be ignored. But I should actually check before potentially being more wrong.

DACK FAYDEN
Feb 25, 2013

Bear Witness

A Buttery Pastry posted:

I might have confused it with the Roman system. Three years doesnít sound that bad, ignoring that itís supposedly not the most pleasant experience.
Yeah, Romans were twenty (well, later imperial-period Romans.)

Bucnasti posted:

I don't know if this part is true, but I heard you could sign up under an assumed name and that finishing your service and becoming a citizen basically gave you a new identity.
Again based on that skim, you now have to voluntarily give them your real name for the citizenship, but you can do so after a year of service under an assumed name. So you can't get away from everything, but you can do a pretty good job disappearing first...

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat



Grimey Drawer

The downside is that no one is going to miss the soldier for hire working under an assumed identity.

I have no data to back this up, but Iím going to assume the mortality rate for the FFL is higher than the French Army*.

* minus that massive outlier that was WW1

tight aspirations
Jul 13, 2009



Do shoe-shine guys expert in nuances in complex cardio/theological cases still exist?

shelley
Nov 7, 2010


OctaviusBeaver posted:

There was a Foreign Legion guy here who did an Ask/Tell thread a number of years ago, I can't find it now though.

Itís been a couple of days, but I happened to run across that thread today, so here it is:

Ask me about the French Foreign Legion

DeadlyMuffin
Jul 3, 2007




DACK FAYDEN posted:

Total derail but holy poo poo are you the oldest goon now that we banned the pedophile Chicago cop some years back?

Holy poo poo the cop was a pedophile? The guy who did the cops on the beat threads?

Lemniscate Blue
Apr 21, 2006

Here we go again.

DeadlyMuffin posted:

Holy poo poo the cop was a pedophile? The guy who did the cops on the beat threads?

As I recall he made a few too many comments about "of course it's perfectly normal to get horned up over teenaged girls, that's when they're most attractive!" and the mods just got sick of it.

Shine
Feb 26, 2007

No Muscles For The Majority


Here's the post the old goon cop made about how fuckable teenage girls are: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?noseen=0&threadid=3663270&pagenumber=108&perpage=40#post435397851

And here's some choice commentary:

Triticum Guzzler posted:

First, I am 72. Second, technically it's ephebophilia.

Triticum Guzzler posted:

Three years removed from 69 here, so I can address this with the seriousness it deserves: I have a pokemon ranking scheme for paedophiles and actually what this guy did? It's super effective.

Triticum Guzzler posted:

TOKAII: When I was born-
JOE ROGAN: In 1942.
TOKAII: In 1942, yes. When I was born there were no cellphones or internet
JOE ROGAN: Wow...
TOKAII: You basically had to gently caress children from the neighbourhood. Iceland? Forget it.
JOE ROGAN: Tghat's loving CRAZY...

Triticum Guzzler posted:

As a grandfather, here are my thoughts on child molestation: that's a 10-4 (police officer for please gently caress children)

DeadlyMuffin
Jul 3, 2007




loving gross. Thanks for the background, I always wondered what happened to those threads

Cessna
Feb 20, 2013

KHABAHBLOOOM

quote:

technically it's ephebophilia.

There's a red flag the size of a stadium.

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat



Grimey Drawer

I feel like knowing how to spell the different types of pedos is a red flag visible from space.

Mr. Fall Down Terror
Jan 24, 2018


Elissimpark posted:

Oh sure, everyone remembers the FRENCH Foreign Legion, but no-one ever remembers the SPANISH Foreign Legion.

Does the French one march twice as fast as the rest of their armies? Do they have a goat in a little hat as a mascot?

No, I didn't think so.

who can forget the spanish foreign legion once they see their uniforms

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Lemniscate Blue
Apr 21, 2006

Here we go again.

Mr. Fall Down Terror posted:

who can forget the spanish foreign legion once they see their uniforms



It's also important to know just what kind of creepy fascist motherfuckers the Spanish Legion are.

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