MLB Offseason N/V: I fucking bang, dude. Are you kidding me?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > MLB Offseason N/V: I fucking bang, dude. Are you kidding me?

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Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

would baseball please just start already i'm getting antsy

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:26

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 23:22

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

Baseball has already ended.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:27

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

Pitchers and catchers report today, so at least there is that.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:27

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

idk if anyone posted this but the dodgers DFA'd White and Garlick get their 40-man in shape.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:30

IcePhoenix: Sep 18, 2005; Take me to your Shida

Popete posted:

Pitchers and catchers report today, so at least there is that.

tomorrow

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:33

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

IcePhoenix posted:

tomorrow

Depends

https://www.springtrainingonline.com/reporting-dates/

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:34

IcePhoenix: Sep 18, 2005; Take me to your Shida

Popete posted:

Depends

https://www.springtrainingonline.com/reporting-dates/

I was going off of this list

https://www.sportingnews.com/us/mlb/news/mlb-spring-training-reporting-dates-2020-pitchers-catchers/1ae9szkq7eby41wtmgcckq7hen

and it's the one I'm saying is more accurate because then I don't have to make a new thread until tomorrow

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:39

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Poque posted:

I think they already do this. It just can't be every series since all the divisions have odd numbers of teams. Cubs only had six non-division games in September 2019. Pirates had more but four of their last five series were divisional.

And we poo poo the bed in September by losing 9 in a row. lol

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:41

habeasdorkus: Nov 3, 2013; Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.

I hope the Red Sox end up at the bottom of their distribution. If I didn't already have tickets to Pedro Martinez Funko Pop night I wouldn't go to a single game.

The Mets are going to stay healthy and kick rear end and win the World Series, and that'll take some sting out of losing Syndergaard in free agency.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:42

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

IcePhoenix posted:

I was going off of this list

https://www.sportingnews.com/us/mlb/news/mlb-spring-training-reporting-dates-2020-pitchers-catchers/1ae9szkq7eby41wtmgcckq7hen

and it's the one I'm saying is more accurate because then I don't have to make a new thread until tomorrow

Yeah I'm seeing different dates from different sites too. Oh well I don't think it really matters much until the games start.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:43

Pancakes: May 21, 2001; Crypto-Rump Roast

Some Cardinals pitchers have already reported so I�ve been anxiously watching 10-second videos of grown men playing catch.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:50

Sydin: Oct 29, 2011; Another spring commute

https://twitter.com/dohyoungpark/status/1227296686025908229

Pretty sure this is the first player to actually come out and legitimately apologize?

# ? Feb 11, 2020 19:56

Salvor_Hardin: Sep 13, 2005; I want to go protest.; Nap Ghost

habeasdorkus posted:

I hope the Red Sox end up at the bottom of their distribution. If I didn't already have tickets to Pedro Martinez Funko Pop night I wouldn't go to a single game.

The Mets are going to stay healthy and kick rear end and win the World Series, and that'll take some sting out of losing Syndergaard in free agency.

A 0.400 record and half-empty Fenway would be a nice response to lovely ownership.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:02

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

I love looking at the players 2017 stats anytime they say something about it.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:03

seiferguy: Jun 9, 2005; FLAWED
INTUITION; Toilet Rascal

Actually the new playoff proposal is good

https://mobile.twitter.com/StoneLarry/status/1226992257644937216

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:06

Darude - Adam Sandstorm: Aug 16, 2012

Popete posted:

I love looking at the players 2017 stats anytime they say something about it.

ya but REMORSEFUL

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:15

Niwrad: Jul 1, 2008

Popete posted:

I love looking at the players 2017 stats anytime they say something about it.

League average hitter his whole career except for the year they cheated and he is magically one of the best in baseball. The guy got a $21m deal out of it so I'm guessing there are no regrets.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:15

mcmagic: Jul 1, 2004; If you see this avatar while scrolling the succ zone, you have been visited by the mcmagic of shitty lib takes! Good luck and prosperity will come to you, but only if you reply "shut the fuck up mcmagic" to this post!

IDK what is more stupid... This new playoff plan or the 3 batter minimum rule.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:18

Niwrad: Jul 1, 2008

Dinosaurs! posted:

IIRC teams are allowed to negotiate their own streaming rights starting 2021. Not that that won�t result in ridiculous gouging for Cubs fans to make their network look like the reasonable choice. But ostensibly it solves mlb.tv blackouts.

Turns out Peter Angelos loving over the Nats might pay off since they won�t be competing against their own TV channel!

It is nice that they realize people under 35 may enjoy their sport.

But doesn't this still mean there are blackout restrictions on MLB.tv? So if I'm in Chicago, I have to buy through the Cubs and can't just get the MLB package?

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:20

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

I'm guessing a lot of teams due to existing deals with providers won't want to or contractually can't provide a standalone streaming option.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:24

FlamingLiberal: Jan 18, 2009; Would you like to play a game?

CarGo got an invite to ST from the Mariners

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:38

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

Former Cub great, Carlos Gonzalez

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:39

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Popete posted:

Former Cub great, Carlos Gonzalez

I was hoping he'd be able to reclaim some of the magic when we signed him.

There was no magic to be had. :smith:

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:43

MrMojok: Jan 28, 2011

Popete posted:

I love looking at the players 2017 stats anytime they say something about it.

I know it's stating the obvious, but the jump in OPS and drop in strikeouts is just obscene

# ? Feb 11, 2020 20:51

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

Ron Roenicke is the new Red Sox manager ... except he has "interim" in his title.

Boston, what are you doing?

# ? Feb 11, 2020 21:13

No Safe Word: Feb 26, 2005

Popete posted:

I love looking at the players 2017 stats anytime they say something about it.

Now do it for literally anyone else on the roster. Reddick and Marisnick had a huge bump but pretty much everyone else is maybe just a little better (which, when your teammates are better can elevate you) or the same or worse. It was Bregman and Yuli's first seasons but they had even better years this year. Correa had his best year but he's still just good overall and his whole story year-to-year is weird and inconsistent anyway. Altuve was already amazing, Springer did even better this year, etc.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 21:13

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

No Safe Word posted:

Now do it for literally anyone else on the roster. Reddick and Marisnick had a huge bump but pretty much everyone else is maybe just a little better (which, when your teammates are better can elevate you) or the same or worse. It was Bregman and Yuli's first seasons but they had even better years this year. Correa had his best year but he's still just good overall and his whole story year-to-year is weird and inconsistent anyway. Altuve was already amazing, Springer did even better this year, etc.

Hmmmm so what you're saying is the Astros got even better at cheating in 2018/2019?

buzz buzz

# ? Feb 11, 2020 21:17

Kirios: Jan 26, 2010

Cubs cheating peaked at 2016.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 21:40

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

No Safe Word posted:

Now do it for literally anyone else on the roster. Reddick and Marisnick had a huge bump but pretty much everyone else is maybe just a little better (which, when your teammates are better can elevate you) or the same or worse. It was Bregman and Yuli's first seasons but they had even better years this year. Correa had his best year but he's still just good overall and his whole story year-to-year is weird and inconsistent anyway. Altuve was already amazing, Springer did even better this year, etc.

Lol you will never stop, it's pretty hilarious.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 21:41

howe_sam: Mar 7, 2013; Creepy little garbage eaters

Timby posted:

Ron Roenicke is the new Red Sox manager ... except he has "interim" in his title.

Boston, what are you doing?

Covering their asses in case the mlb investigation turns up something unexpected about Roenicke's involvement in the sign stealing.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 21:59

Darude - Adam Sandstorm: Aug 16, 2012

Timby posted:

Ron Roenicke is the new Red Sox manager ... except he has "interim" in his title.

Boston, what are you doing?

waiting for Pedroia to retire baby

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:24

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

https://twitter.com/tykelly11/status/1227317157102596097?s=20

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:27

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Ty Kelly is a very pro follow over on yon Twitter.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:28

Kevlar v2.0: Dec 25, 2003; =^•⩊•^=

https://twitter.com/JeffPassan/status/1227341241114906624

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:37

Milovan Drecun: Apr 17, 2007; I masturbate in traffic.

Niwrad posted:

League average hitter his whole career except for the year they cheated and he is magically one of the best in baseball. The guy got a $21m deal out of it so I'm guessing there are no regrets.

Eh the Twins grabbed him late last off-season because his market wasn't all that great. He got paid as the league average hitter, with maybe some small hope he could repeat 2017. Now that's pretty unlikely and nobody is mad about the contract. Twins FO values setting a floor; whenever someone goes down Marwin slots right in. Last year Sano was out before the start of the season, so he was never really even the 10th man.

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:39

bawfuls: Oct 28, 2009

Beltr�n lifetime ban when?

https://twitter.com/jacob_resnick/status/1227340422965612545?s=21

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:45

Sydin: Oct 29, 2011; Another spring commute

Between Kipnis, Descalso, Nico, and Bote, the Cubs almost have a single league average 2B!

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:47

IcePhoenix: Sep 18, 2005; Take me to your Shida

bawfuls posted:

Beltr�n lifetime ban when?

https://twitter.com/jacob_resnick/status/1227340422965612545?s=21

please won't somebody think of the poor impressionable insanely talented rookies

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:52

seiferguy: Jun 9, 2005; FLAWED
INTUITION; Toilet Rascal

bawfuls posted:

Beltrán lifetime ban when?

https://twitter.com/jacob_resnick/status/1227340422965612545?s=21

Beltran had more power over Hinch, lmao

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:53

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 23:22

Bird in a Blender: Nov 17, 2005; It's amazing what they can do with computers these days.

Sydin posted:

Between Kipnis, Descalso, Nico, and Bote, the Cubs almost have a single league average 2B!

How many do we need to form a 2B Voltran?

# ? Feb 11, 2020 22:54

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > MLB Offseason N/V: I fucking bang, dude. Are you kidding me?

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