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looking forward to the ten-hour video blogs detailing crimes hitherto unknown to humanity
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Mar 29, 2023 19:47
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Trillhouse posted:he's going to pissed when it's not a gaming laptop finally a use for those OLPC devices (one laptop per criminal)
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Mar 29, 2023 19:50
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Trillhouse posted:he's going to pissed when it's not a gaming laptop i thought the thing about league was it would run on a literal potato computer
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Mar 29, 2023 19:52
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give him one of these and let him loose
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Mar 29, 2023 20:10
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Just-In-Timeberlake posted:give him one of these and let him loose is he supposed to eat that fancy urinal cake?
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Mar 29, 2023 20:15
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Paladinus posted:He will only be allowed to play unranked and against bots in League. cruel and unusual, but i like it
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Mar 29, 2023 20:37
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quote:Sam Bankman-Fried, founder of fallen cryptocurrency exchange FTX who claimed to have just $100,000 in his bank account last November, is preparing for trial in October backed by a roster of powerful attorneys. But it has remained unclear, until now, how the former billionaire would afford his pricey defense. Forbes has learned that Bankman-Fried has been paying legal fees from a multi-million dollar gift he gave his father with money borrowed from FTX's sister company. In 2021, while CEO of FTX, Bankman-Fried made a large monetary gift to his father, Stanford Law professor Joseph Bankman, two sources with operational knowledge of both companies told Forbes. It was funded by a loan from the exchange's trading firm, Alameda Research, they said. https://www.forbes.com/sites/sarahemerson/2023/03/29/sam-bankman-fried-legal-fees-funded-by-alameda-money-gifted-to-father-joe-bankman/
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Mar 29, 2023 23:29
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qirex posted:https://www.forbes.com/sites/sarahemerson/2023/03/29/sam-bankman-fried-legal-fees-funded-by-alameda-money-gifted-to-father-joe-bankman/ lmao quote:Bankman-Fried is currently represented by Mark Cohen and Christian Everdell of Cohen & Gresser, both former federal prosecutors who were part of a defense team that advised Jeffrey Epstein associate Ghislaine Maxwell, who was convicted in 2021 of sex trafficking a minor. sam's gonna be executed
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Mar 29, 2023 23:33
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Beeftweeter posted:lmao Sam Bankman-Lethal-Injected
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Mar 29, 2023 23:51
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Lol he's going to get his parents locked up too
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Mar 29, 2023 23:57
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Gubbinal Girl posted:Lol he's going to get his parents locked up too Yeah, they absolutely signed up for that when they used the stolen money to pay for his legal defense.
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Mar 30, 2023 00:06
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they can't arrest a mother father, son trio for the same mountain of crimes
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Mar 30, 2023 00:20
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he did buy his parents a mansion funded with crime money and they were somehow just cool with that happening, so I'm gonna assume that they were in on, and that they also think they're too smart and too good white of people to get in trouble
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Mar 30, 2023 00:55
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Boxturret posted:they can't arrest a mother father, son trio for the same mountain of crimes this ain't double jeopardy it's family feud
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Mar 30, 2023 00:56
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Mercury_Storm posted:he did buy his parents a mansion funded with crime money and they were somehow just cool with that happening, so I'm gonna assume that they were in on, and that they also think they're too smart and too good white of people to get in trouble reminder that his mother was seen laughing in court she found how few of her son's crimes they had uncovered hilarious
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Mar 30, 2023 01:13
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smellmycheese posted:https://twitter.com/unusual_whales/status/1641110718278664192?s=46&t=m_nNbkNoHG4lLitcpyHReg you're grounded, young man!
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Mar 30, 2023 01:27
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Boxturret posted:reminder that his mother was seen laughing in court She raised a Bankman-Fried after all
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Mar 30, 2023 01:32
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divabot posted:looking forward to the ten-hour video blogs detailing crimes hitherto unknown to humanity like I said before, he's gonna become a pioneer in criming via gopher, telnet, et al.
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Mar 30, 2023 01:37
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sbf gonna learn Atreides hand language to confess his crimes
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Mar 30, 2023 01:54
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Vincent Van Goatse posted:like I said before, he's gonna become a pioneer in criming via gopher, telnet, et al. SBF found in possession of a Gameboy Game Link Cable
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Mar 30, 2023 01:56
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sam has been taking vocal lessons so that he can imitate modem signals in preparation for this. his crimes are always 2 steps ahead
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Mar 30, 2023 02:02
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Beeftweeter posted:sam has been taking vocal lessons so that he can imitate modem signals in preparation for this. his crimes are always 2 steps ahead they were worried about mitnick hacking the pentagon over a prison pay phone but they had no idea he was merely a herald.
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Mar 30, 2023 02:59
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the only way of safely keeping sbf from committing crimes is to have his eyes and mouth covered so he can't speak or blink, and his body incased in resin so he can't move it to tap out morse code.
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Mar 30, 2023 03:04
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I have no mouth and I must scream (about my crimes)
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Mar 30, 2023 03:05
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there will be a special sect of deaf monks created to feed him, they will be train explicitly to not read lips
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Mar 30, 2023 03:07
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they are going to use t-shirt cannon robots to deliver his uber eats orders last mile to him (and also t-shirts)
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Mar 30, 2023 03:16
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reclusive sbf "cannot wear pants"
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Mar 30, 2023 03:17
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they will breed a special type of shrimp that throw themselves in to his mouth
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Mar 30, 2023 03:31
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sbf is the chuck norris of crimes
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Mar 30, 2023 03:37
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Vincent Van Goatse posted:like I said before, he's gonna become a pioneer in criming via gopher, telnet, et al. It could work... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xR5rKr-p6lc
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Mar 30, 2023 03:58
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smellmycheese posted:https://twitter.com/unusual_whales/status/1641110718278664192?s=46&t=m_nNbkNoHG4lLitcpyHReg isn't he living with his parents? are they gonna be banned from owning phones or is the guard just going to be camped out on the stairs to the basement/"man cave"?
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Mar 30, 2023 04:41
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sbf either walking out a free boy or somehow bringing his parents down with him are both equally funny outcomes and i hope we get to see one of them. or both
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Mar 30, 2023 04:52
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RPATDO_LAMD posted:isn't he living with his parents? are they gonna be banned from owning phones or is the guard just going to be camped out on the stairs to the basement/"man cave"? you see, his parents are very good lawyers that would never dream of committing crimes. similarly they cannot fathom sam — an extremely good boy — doing anything illegal. it's laughable, really. ha, ha! ha! hear the laughter? i'm sure this will all be cleared up and we can then get some ice cream cake for sam because he's been such a good sport, and a very good boy, about these continued misunderstandings
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Mar 30, 2023 04:53
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RPATDO_LAMD posted:isn't he living with his parents? are they gonna be banned from owning phones or is the guard just going to be camped out on the stairs to the basement/"man cave"? Your honor, he's but a boy. It's more of a pillow fort!
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Mar 30, 2023 05:03
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Deep Dish Fuckfest posted:sbf either walking out a free boy or somehow bringing his parents down with him are both equally funny outcomes and i hope we get to see one of them. or both when the judge runs the numbers through the sentencing guidelines spreadsheet there are so many crimes it overflows the sentence and he has to serve -2,147,483,648 years
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Mar 30, 2023 05:03
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Beeftweeter posted:you see, his parents are very good lawyers that would never dream of committing crimes. similarly they cannot fathom sam — an extremely good boy — doing anything illegal. it's laughable, really. ha, ha! ha! hear the laughter? i'm sure this will all be cleared up and we can then get some ice cream cake for sam because he's been such a good sport, and a very good boy, about these continued misunderstandings *several pojnds of crimes out of from SBF’s parents’ pockets and purse* Ah! Well, other than that,
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Mar 30, 2023 05:24
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i just realised, if mark did nothing wrong and sam did everything wrong, what happens when they approach each other? cosmic level attraction followed by slamming into each other so fast that all living beings on two continents go deaf? or matter-antimatter style anhilation?
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Mar 30, 2023 06:47
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trucutru posted:SBF found in possession of a Gameboy Game Link Cable MFer gonna wonder trade Pokemon nicknamed as his confessions.
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Mar 30, 2023 06:57
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Weatherman posted:i just realised, if mark did nothing wrong and sam did everything wrong, what happens when they approach each other? cosmic level attraction followed by slamming into each other so fast that all living beings on two continents go deaf? or matter-antimatter style anhilation? they neutralize into a creature that does things that are technically not wrong but seem like they should be
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Mar 30, 2023 06:58
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FAUXTON posted:this ain't double jeopardy it's family feud
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Mar 30, 2023 07:33
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