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SyNack Sassimov
May 4, 2006

Let the robot win.
            --Captain James T. Vader

RobotCoupeDetat posted:

e: found the photos and remembered I mostly steamed my toes. I'll post photos tomorrow, it's past my bedtime.

Mmm, steamed toes! Old family recipe!

Oh you wouldn't have heard it in Utica, no, it's an Albany expression.

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Stack Machine
Mar 6, 2016

I can see through time!


Fun Shoe

My first actual job was at Burger King and we sliced tomatoes on something like this, but without the convenient hand guard plate thing:



It was maybe a bit dull and ripe tomatoes benefitted from a bit of momentum. They'd squish if you went slow and steady. Luckily the one time I did gently caress up and catch the tip of my index finger in it the tomatoes were relatively firm and so I wasn't just slamming them through as fast as I could. It still both bled a lot and stung like a motherfucker on account of being a series of deep parallel cuts smothered in fresh tomato juice.

PainterofCrap
Oct 17, 2002

hey bebe




Not a kitchen injury but stupid nonetheless.

I managed to make it to age 53 without learning that one should not take an entire box of sparklers and ignite them while holding them in your hand.

I had no idea the heat would reach critical in about .000021 seconds and it was a lovely flash burn.

Hurt like a motherfucker. Got ice on it immediately and kept it iced all night.



I debated getting medical attention, but it kept hurting at a reasonable level, so I figured there was no nerve damage. I was able to wrap it using strategically-placed medical foam and wrapped my hand around a tennis ball to keep the skin stretched without breaking any of the blisters. Was able to keep it that way for ten days. Healed up fine with no scarring, but it took a year for the skin to return to the same shade.

PainterofCrap fucked around with this message at 04:01 on Apr 8, 2021

goatsestretchgoals
Jun 4, 2011

in soviet russia, you shove robot

Spinz posted:

Mandolins should be illegal or like a licensed thing

I work in a machine shop and mandolins scare the poo poo out of me.

E: Like that machine exists to slice part of your finger off. Even worse: most chain supermarkets have the mandolin within view of the customers and if you're understaffed and someone asks you a question...

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010


We real cool. We
Left school. We

Lurk late. We
Strike straight. We

Sing sin. We
Thin gin. We

Jazz June. We
Die soon.



I'm surprised I didn't see more airbags deploy in that one

Dr.Smasher
Nov 27, 2002

Cyberpunk 1987


Uthor posted:

Stupidest kitchen injury, go!


I had cooked some bacon and was cutting it up for mac n cheese n bacon. I had a hand on top of the blade to apply extra pressure, and it slipped off into the pointy business end of the knife and gashed up my finger. Bled for a good five minutes.

No blood in the bacon though, so it went right into that mac n cheese.


Every couple of years I apparently need to give myself a reminder that you should never rub your eyes right after handling hot peppers, but I don't know if that counts as an injury.

big dyke energy
Jul 29, 2006

Football? Yaaaay


Stack Machine posted:

My first actual job was at Burger King and we sliced tomatoes on something like this, but without the convenient hand guard plate thing:



It was maybe a bit dull and ripe tomatoes benefitted from a bit of momentum. They'd squish if you went slow and steady. Luckily the one time I did gently caress up and catch the tip of my index finger in it the tomatoes were relatively firm and so I wasn't just slamming them through as fast as I could. It still both bled a lot and stung like a motherfucker on account of being a series of deep parallel cuts smothered in fresh tomato juice.

Ohhh I hate this motherfucker!! Subway uses it too, also without that big guard thing. It never got fully cleaned properly because we were all terrified of destroying our hands in it.

Speaking of hand destruction, I got a mandoline for christmas one year. I then drank a whole bottle of champagne with breakfast and decided hey, I'll make scalloped potatoes and try this thing out!

I got one potato in before I realized, oh poo poo I'm very drunk I am going to kill myself on this, so I proceeded to just...slice the rest of the potatoes but extremely slowly so it took me ages. Still have 100% of all my fingers! ...but I cut myself peeling the potatoes.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009




Bleak Gremlin

The thing with a mandolin slicer, especially when it's brand new, is people don't realise how fast it eats through whatever you're putting into it. So you think "Oh I don't need the little guard thingy, I can just keep going back and forth with my carrot until I'm down to the last third, then I'll get the guard out, why is there blood everywhere"

Elviscat
Jan 1, 2008

MESS WITH THE OWL GET DISEMBOWEL





RobotCoupeDetat posted:

I was having some really bad lower leg pain following an ACL reconstruction surgery. Switched to tennis-shoe style kitchen shoes. When draining the steam jacket kettle into the drain beneath it, we'd use a bucket with a hole cut in the side to redirect the stream of water into the drain without splashing. I was draining boiling water out of it, I still can't remember what for, and the bucket was misaligned by an inch or two. With very breathable, lace-up shoes, and lovely proprioception following the surgery, I kicked the bucket with my bad leg to get the water directed properly. I missed and my foot went directly into the water stream.

I steamed the gently caress out of my foot and had a very impressive blister covering most of the one of my toes. My exec and I had a blast making the sous dry-heave with disgusting commentary on the wound. RIP Chef Ed, I miss you every day.

I'll have to look for the photos tomorrow or Friday.

e: found the photos and remembered I mostly steamed my toes. I'll post photos tomorrow, it's past my bedtime.

You're lucky.

Onboard submarines we have a steam jacket kettle, used for pasta and whatnot, the steam in the kettle body gets up to like 400F, so it liked to burn pasta and rice and stuff. Also we wear sneakers when underway because of the whole "sneak" factor.

So I'm "cranking" in the galley (washing dishes basically) and I hear this blood-curdling scream, I run into the galley, and one of our cooks had accidentally released the kettle while shaking it to prevent burning, and dumped the whole thing on his feet, problem was it was hot enough to melt his socks into his feet. I called for doc, and then got the bonus duty of holding this dude down, after a big shot of morphine, while he screamed as Doc debrided the melted polyester off his ruined loving feet, the whole top layer of skin was gone. It was horrifying, fortunately we were close to the coast of the US, so a Coast Guard helicopter came and picked him up within a couple hours, only helo medivac I ever got to see.

He never came back, I assume the Navy medically retired him.

Leather boots were required in the galley after that.

E: we also had two more mundane medivacs based on sailors shattering their teeth on burnt rice, so that's 3 total victims to the Steam Kettles From Hell.

Jabor
Jul 16, 2010

#1 Loser at SpaceChem

how often are submariners cranking it in the galley anyway

Elviscat
Jan 1, 2008

MESS WITH THE OWL GET DISEMBOWEL





Oh pretty much all the time, it's a rite of passage really.

Have you really lived if you haven't crawled into a coffin rack to sleep with the scent of another man in your nostrils, a maxim magazine open to Katie Perry and three used pairs of underwear in it?

A song relevant to this thread https://youtu.be/edAxujKev1I

AzureSkys
Apr 27, 2003



If breakroom kitchens count, when working night shift on the ramp at an airline at a big airport I put some pop tarts in the toaster for lunch. I then went to the restroom foolishly leaving it unattended. I returned to see smoke billowing out of the toaster and learned it was broke. The timer thing didn't work to pop up whatever you were toasting so it just kept cooking away.

The sink was right next to it so I manually popped them up and went to dump them in water, but the tarts basically disintegrated in my hand and molten jelly burned the hell out of it. It happened to be snowing so I just kept holding snowballs to try to alleviate the burn. I was too embarrassed to go to the medical place.

Mostly, I'm super grateful the smoke alarms didn't get set off and the whole breakroom area and who knows where else get drenched in that aged fire suppression water due to a burning pop tart.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009




Bleak Gremlin

https://i.imgur.com/SXzUndJ.mp4

Wait for it.

RabbitWizard
Oct 21, 2008



Muldoon

Uthor posted:

Stupidest kitchen injury, go!
Oh hey I once made a short thread about that. PSA about glasses with a small crack and hand washing them (Don't!!!!) There's an imgur album linked in there showing the results: https://imgur.com/a/YrqgzQL

Humphreys
Jan 26, 2013

We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule



I was a cook at a Chinese Buffet restaurant when I was a teenager and would kick one of the swinging kitchen doors open while loaded up with trays mid rushed stride. One time I missed the left door, kicking the right one and I just straight up ran into the closed left door, chipping a front tooth and breaking my nose. Some low-key burns from Mongolian Beef sauce as I fell but the highlight was the face in the door.

New Secret life video! It's LONG and as dry as everything else but great.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q43tZ6DjuIE

Pickled Tink
Apr 28, 2012

Have you heard about First Dog? It's a very good comic I just love.

Also, wear your bike helmets kids. I copped several blows to the head but my helmet left me totally unscathed.

Finally you should check out First Dog as it's a good comic I like it very much.

Fun Shoe

As an adult, the worst I have done to myself in a kitchen was slice the very tip of a finger off while cutting a capsicum in half (Bell pepper to you american weirdos). I bandaged it, then stretched an old plastic bag over it and secured it with a rubber band before finishing my food prep (To keep blood out of my food. Hygiene is important). Before this comes off as me being some kind of tough person, I was swearing the entire time.

As a kid, I was extremely young and pulled a pot of hot water off the stove and onto me. My mother ripped my shirt off over my head, getting the water off me before I could burn all over, but I have a scar just above my left elbow joint where water actually made contact with skin and burned me.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009




Bleak Gremlin

Pickled Tink posted:

As a kid, I was extremely young and pulled a pot of hot water off the stove and onto me.

I did basically the same thing. ~18 months old, toddling around the place, reached up to a coffee table to steady myself, pulled a pot of boiling coffee down on me. My mother, who was a nurse before she was married, got me straight into the bathroom sluicing cold water on me for half an hour then to hospital. No skin grafts, fortunately, just a crinkly scar on my right foot that I completely forget about until someone reminds me of it.

Jokerpilled Drudge
Jan 27, 2010

Level: 3

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZPDfZArP_Q

Fruits of the sea
Dec 1, 2010


Pickled Tink posted:

As an adult, the worst I have done to myself in a kitchen was slice the very tip of a finger off while cutting a capsicum in half (Bell pepper to you american weirdos). I bandaged it, then stretched an old plastic bag over it and secured it with a rubber band before finishing my food prep (To keep blood out of my food. Hygiene is important). Before this comes off as me being some kind of tough person, I was swearing the entire time.

Eh, it happens occasionally. Standard practice at one of my old kitchens was to cut a finger off a latex glove and tape it on. Like a tiny little condom

The OSHA/unsanitary part here is that the owner never sourced some proper tape that didn't come loose in water and folks wouldn't wear another glove on top.

E: this is also more a collection of health violations, but jesus christ I have seen and been told to do some sketchy poo poo at some restaurants. Cook a frozen steak straight from the freezer (this was only for one regular customer, but still), the boss' family cooking up food in their kitchen at home instead of using the proper kitchen, just... not keeping records on daily date/hygiene checks, washing salad greens in the same sink used for rinsing mussels...

Probably the worst was a totally checked out chef telling me that most of the mussels were closed but just to serve them anyways.

Fruits of the sea fucked around with this message at 11:49 on Apr 8, 2021

Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004

Nyah hah hah hah hah!


https://i.imgur.com/NNiSOrT.mp4

aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009

kiss kiss



Pillbug

Life WILL find a motherfucking way

Skellybones
May 31, 2011






Fun Shoe


Thatís a load bearing drain now.

a hot gujju bhabhi
Apr 5, 2007


Sorry for such a dumb question, but what is OSHA? What does it stand for?

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004


here he comes
and he's gone again


Nap Ghost

Occasionally Stuff Harms All

BlackIronHeart
Aug 1, 2004

The Oath Breaker's about to hit warphead nine Kaptain!


Oh poo poo, Him Again.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009




Bleak Gremlin

a hot gujju bhabhi posted:

Sorry for such a dumb question, but what is OSHA? What does it stand for?

Regardless of the things it really means, it stands for the Occupational Safety and Health Administration, the regulatory agency of the US Department of Labor that is responsible for workplace safety.

Unless you work in a mine, in which case the agency responsible is the MSHA, the Mine Safety and Health Administration. Mines have their own particular lethal hazards and need a separate regulatory body.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007



In Australia it's OH&S (Occupation Health & Safety).

Ravendas
Sep 29, 2001






Looks like Taiwan, there's a lot of trees on top of buildings that really shouldn't be. You'll see root networks from trees going down sides of buildings and through drains like that, it's great. People love putting trees in pots on roofs or balconies, and they just keep growing. Post-apocalyptic, pre-apocalypse.





Can't find my favorite one, a tree on the top of a 6th story building in Taipei's XimenDing with roots going down the pipes, similar to the video

thomawesome
Jul 19, 2009


OSHA stands for a thing you can pay off if you're hiring temp workers

Wolfsbane
Jul 29, 2009

What time is it, Eccles?



UK version is HSE (Health and Safety Executive)

Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004

Nyah hah hah hah hah!


Antigravitas
Dec 8, 2019

Outside Context Problem


I, for one, welcome more trees in cities.

Nenonen
Oct 22, 2009



Fallen Rib


I see Evergreen has wisened up

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

I hated your old avatar so much I paid for this one from a gay furry visual novel. gay rights and smoke weed every day

Just watched an episode of deadly roads and these dudes flipped a truck and had to just wait there for over a week for assistance, even had to hitchhike out to get stitches then return to the truck to just wait forever for help. poo poo is beyond osha.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tj2WBbA4dM4

The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004




Ultra Carp

Memento posted:

Regardless of the things it really means, it stands for the Occupational Safety and Health Administration, the regulatory agency of the US Department of Labor that is responsible for workplace safety.

Unless you work in a mine, in which case the agency responsible is the MSHA, the Mine Safety and Health Administration. Mines have their own particular lethal hazards and need a separate regulatory body.

Osha and Msha were my favorite part of OG Magic Cards

fins
May 31, 2011



Floss Finder

Caribbean version is ???

fake edit: looked it up for my country. The legislation is 50-70 years old, predates independence, and prohibits the employment of women in factories.

solarNativity
Nov 11, 2012



Nenonen posted:

I see Evergreen has wisened up

RoastBeef
Jul 10, 2008



Going to end up with a broken box if they're not careful.

haveblue
Aug 15, 2005




Toilet Rascal

For the past three days the Suez Creek has been blocked, impacting 0.000001% of global trade

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Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004

Nyah hah hah hah hah!



Lmao

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