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oh but seriously I
Sep 26, 2019

Do you ever wonder if there are other planets out there
(source)

God they love them some lovely quasi-metal

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Mr. Squishy
Mar 22, 2010

A country where you can always get richer.

I think I'm the person who enjoys this Allie story. I hope they lose to jobbers sometime due to them hating each other. That was a really nasty drop on Lo Rida. You can hear Audrey telling everyone to wrap it up after that. I was legit uncomfortable when Butcher threw him again a moment later. I enjoy Ricky's music almost as much as he does. Brandon and Peter continue to rule.

explosivo
May 23, 2004

Fueled by Satan

I'm just now catching up on Dark and I have to say holy poo poo Ricky Starks' spear was loving awesome

Duke Pukem
Oct 23, 2010

Three cheers for dark beer!



that was a good Dark, but that backdrop driver was reeaal close to being a career ender

Xerzes
May 16, 2012




What was that thing behind Blade's left ear?

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.




Darkthoughts

Opening with a Brandon / Librarians segment. Good stuff. Leva is so lovely and excited. Love the Impact ref and "I read it to her, she read it to me"

1) Max Caster vs Shawn Dean. Been looking forward to this since his diss track. Love the platinum sign on Max's tights. Caster peacocks well. Spears doesn't look at all bad here and has some good power moves. The spinebuster / C4 sequence is great. Not really enough time to see Caster's potential, but I liked what I saw
2) Pineapple Pete versus Lance Archer. I was expecting a mugging and was glad to see Suge D get some good lion heart offense in before the inevitable murder. Archer looked good, but for a few minutes Suge looked great. Props to Jake for participating in the bump spot. Suge fighting out of the blackout was great. Janela with a leafblower was great.
3) Ricky Starks vs Spare Jungle Boy. Love Ricky's entrance. Starks has such ring presence, and feels like one of those guys where everything looks good. That standing dropkick is just exquisite. I don't know what they're going to do with him in future, but I would absolutely buy something in the "Latino Nature Boy" mold. Loved him fistbumping Taz but not Excalibur
4) Brady Pierce vs Scorpio Sky. Swole Treat Williams makes his way to the ring. New tunes for Sky, signs of a singles push. Wow, does he look good. Pierce doesn't look bad here, just unformed, but Sky looks like a goddamn superstar. Put this guy in a title chase immediately.
5) Brandi and Allie vs Kilynn King and Skyler Moore. I liked the little hand slap between King and Moore. Establish them as friends. Hi Big Biceps Brandi (it's a bit weird for your brother in law to kiss your biceps). The Nightmare Sisters thing was also a bit weird. King is a bit sloppy early on. Get the sense this won't be a Workrate match. Allie isn't looking too bad in the ring. I like King and Moore as a team. Wow, that apron bump King took was great. The psychology at the end was interesting.
6) Fuego Del Sol y Low Rider vs the Butcher and the Blade. This is going to be an absolute gubbing. They've finally made B&B look like the monsters they need to be. HOLY gently caress that throw into the corner! This was just a straightforward fun rear end kicking. Christ almighty that backdrop driver from Blade had me worried that Low Rida was dead. Very good fun despite wondering if pepper parks had murdered someone.
7) Bucks vs Player's Handbook. Looking forward to Brandon picking up his first win here against- I'm sorry, couldn't keep a straight face any longer. This is going to be a fun rear end kicking. Cutler has got significantly better of late. Some of the combo stuff the Bucks were doing here was significantly enhanced by how good Cutler is. The fun thing about this match was that even though the Bucks got all the offense, the story was all Player's Handbook. The shine for Avalon and Cutler at the end was great. This was really enjoyable.

A fun hour of wrestling television.

smarxist
Jul 26, 2018

POSTING RONIN




i feel like we're gonna see Avalon/Cutler against something like a Herb Dean/Lee Johnson and finally pick up a W, maybe on Dynamite

Lone Goat
Apr 16, 2003

When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.






smarxist posted:

i feel like we're gonna see Avalon/Cutler against something like a Herb Dean/Lee Johnson and finally pick up a W, maybe on Dynamite

that's some weird fantasy booking that you want to get the UFC ref involved in this

smarxist
Jul 26, 2018

POSTING RONIN




Lone Goat posted:

that's some weird fantasy booking that you want to get the UFC ref involved in this

lol SHAWN DEAN

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.




Fantasy booking:

keep the Cutler / Avalon team going for a while but then have the team bitterly break up in a way where Avalon starts interfering in Cutler's matches and vice versa. Build towards a Cutler / Avalon singles match at the first live Dynamite.

Give them a long, funny match with Leva almost getting involved and then backing off. Then, just as the match is building to its conclusion, a pair of rear end in a top hat heels cause a no contest. I'm thinking Spears and Sabian maybe, a team that are assholes, are above Cutler and Avalon in the standings, but wouldn't be hurt by losing to them, because what happens next is that we get the band back together.

Cutler and Avalon vs the heels at the next Dynamite, and here Cutler and Avalon win by working together. They get a double pin, in fact. After the match, Leva is delighted because her boys can now be friends, but they start bickering over who got the win.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?


Dark was really drat good this week. I loved that look on Avalon and Cutler's face when they started working together and realized it was effective

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida





smarxist posted:

i feel like we're gonna see Avalon/Cutler against something like a Herb Dean/Lee Johnson and finally pick up a W, maybe on Dynamite

it absolutely needs to be against an established team when they get their first win

beggar
Mar 6, 2008

Smoking Makes You Impotent


Fallen Rib

I hope Brandon Cutler never smartens up and gimmicks his dice roll, I look forward to him shrugging off his sad Charlie Brown face every time he looks down and sees he rolled a 4

Wintermutant
Oct 2, 2009



Dinosaur Gum

So it has to be a rib at this point with the camera never actually showing Brandon's rolls, right? Small die, camera doesn't pick it up. Gets a bigger die, camera still doesn't pick it up. Leva actually grabs it and points it at the camera, still doesn't get picked up.

Lanky_Nibz
Apr 30, 2008

We will never be rid of these stars. But I hope they live forever.

Alright time for day-late Dark!

- Cutler, Leva, and Avalon have way too much chemistry. Also, cool of The Young Bucks to help out on the promo.

- Thanks to the diss track and based on his presence, I'm already WAY more into Max Caster than stupid Shawn Spears and his dumb fake-Eminem entrance music. Stop fiddling with your glove you mohwaked buffoon! Having been watching Lucha Underground, I wish the refs here would be more liberal with their use of DQs.

- Lance's braided mohawk is far, FAR superior to Spear's weak poo poo. I'm glad that Pineapple got some time to play this episode. "Where in the hell'd he get that leafblowa?!"

- Starks is serving me classic heel energy, I can't wait to see more of him. Glad he's signed!

- Brady Pearce is really tall. He towered over Scorpio Sky!

- KiLynn King moved the best out of all four ladies imho. Skyler had a ton of strength too. Allie is a better instigator than wrestler haha. Brandi did ok.

- "Taz looking for that all important comped dinner!" Butcher and Blade ooze raw brutality better than just about anyone on the roster, I can see them becoming the mid-card assassins of the AEW.

- I love Avalon's bedazzled robe. And how Taz referred to the d20 as a "magic orb". And how Avalon got "spooked" by the pyro. Great match, perfectly paced and had good storytelling beats: this could have been on Dynamite.

Mr. Squishy
Mar 22, 2010

A country where you can always get richer.

Lanky_Nibz posted:

Lance's braided mohawk is far, FAR superior to Spear's weak poo poo.

Oh, you mean his murderhawk? (I think it took until Double or Nothing for his name to click into place for me. Jake should have explained it the second week)

Lanky_Nibz
Apr 30, 2008

We will never be rid of these stars. But I hope they live forever.

Mr. Squishy posted:

Oh, you mean his murderhawk? (I think it took until Double or Nothing for his name to click into place for me. Jake should have explained it the second week)



I feel enlightened and a little

smarxist
Jul 26, 2018

POSTING RONIN




it is Tuesday my dudes!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ui5uFQM3xG0

Crapple!
Nov 1, 2019




extremely hype for this episode.

ShallNoiseUpon
Sep 10, 2010




Grimey Drawer


extremely thank you for the reminder

xbilkis
Apr 11, 2005

god qb
me
jay hova


oh but seriously I
Sep 26, 2019

Do you ever wonder if there are other planets out there
(source)


Luther was off his game on last weeks dynamite. Barely any tongue n' finger work.

Elaborate video for Pillboy

Crapple!
Nov 1, 2019




surprised the pillman/spears match is on first

ShallNoiseUpon
Sep 10, 2010




Grimey Drawer

Tully making that mask look so cool

xbilkis
Apr 11, 2005

god qb
me
jay hova


Gotta respect Pillman's flow

Barry Bluejeans
Feb 2, 2017

HERE COMES DEATH RIDER

Pillman's doing a good job just not looking completely ridiculous with that haircut. Most guys can't pull off a feathered mullet with highlights

Oil!
Nov 5, 2008

Der's e'rl in dem der hills!




Ham Wrangler

ShallNoiseUpon posted:

Tully making that mask look so cool

I am supposed no one has used a mask as a weapon yet.

oh but seriously I
Sep 26, 2019

Do you ever wonder if there are other planets out there
(source)

That was cute

smarxist
Jul 26, 2018

POSTING RONIN




this is the oldest school match I've ever seen

oh but seriously I
Sep 26, 2019

Do you ever wonder if there are other planets out there
(source)

smarxist posted:

this is the oldest school match I've ever seen

cosy WCW c-show vibes. I liked it!

Barry Bluejeans
Feb 2, 2017

HERE COMES DEATH RIDER

Pillman still seems green as grass but he's certainly got a striking look and seems to have the basics down

xbilkis
Apr 11, 2005

god qb
me
jay hova


Stop trying to make Serious Shawn Spears work!!!

smarxist
Jul 26, 2018

POSTING RONIN




Swollleeee

Wiltsghost
Mar 27, 2011




SWOOOLLLEE

Wiltsghost
Mar 27, 2011




this is a bit odd

ShallNoiseUpon
Sep 10, 2010




Grimey Drawer

SWOLE!

Crapple!
Nov 1, 2019




lmao who the hell is this

Dr. Abysmal
Feb 17, 2010

We're all doomed

This sure is a wacky gimmick

smarxist
Jul 26, 2018

POSTING RONIN




oh my God get well soon Kris / Britt

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oh but seriously I
Sep 26, 2019

Do you ever wonder if there are other planets out there
(source)

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